Coming Together Live 2023: Jesus and Wholistic Sexuality

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Coming Out Ministries

Bryce Bowman

Michael Carducci

Judith Davis

Anthony Davis

Patty Jackson

Robert Rice

Tony Scarpino

Daniel Varela

Daniel Varela Sr.

Questions and Answers

Thank you all for being here, we appreciate it.

We now are going to get to a few of the questions you've been sending through the weeks, we've got some of them earlier, but we're going to invite you to text some more if you're interested.

We have a good queue here, but we may be able to get to some more of them, and if not, they'll be useful for the presenters and the ministries that have been here already.

Mike Carducci will be moderating the questions.

He'll be directing them, tying them together a little bit, and then we'll move on to the next question.

And I'm going to ask him if he wouldn't mind introducing, or should we just go down the line really quick?

All right, let's start over here and we'll come this way.

I'm the pastor of the Stevensville Seventh-day Adventist Church right here in the community.

Michael Carducci, speaker for Coming Out Ministries.

Tony Scarpino, no relation to Carducci, Associate Speaker with Coming Out Ministries.

I've come from London, and we gave our testimony about our daughter's redemption.

I'm from New Jersey, and I spoke on sexual addiction, also Daniel's girlfriend.

Gave my testimony and yep, that's where I'm from.

I'm Enid Varela and I am Daniel's mom and we're coming from North Carolina.

And I'm Patty Jackson and you just heard my testimony.

All right, we have a very interesting variety of people to answer questions, theologians, the parents, those going through the struggles themselves, and people who have established ministry track records in this area.

Most of it's going to be from here though, that you all sent in.

So a frequent statement from LGBT people who have a Christian background is that they repeatedly prayed to God, even begging him to change them, but he didn't.

Some such persons now see this as confirmation that it is indeed God will and plan for them to be LGBT.

My question is, why did God not answer their prayers to change them?

I think most people that struggle with same-sex attraction have suffered with, and I mean suffered.

Daniel and I both were praying as teenagers, you know, Lord take this away.

We don't want this thing So those are I think major questions for for someone that is struggling with it And I think that Daniel is probably the most relevant to answer that question if you would okay, sure The The thing that's on my heart to share is we all have an inclination to sin, and I like how someone put it yesterday, how, you know, when someone is tempted to steal or tempted to, you know, overeat or tempted to lie, they don't just identify themselves as, oh, I'm just such a thief.

Like, God, help me to not be a thief anymore.

It's simply refraining from that temptation and not identifying yourself with that sin because that's not our identity.

And it can be discouraging when the urges are strong, and it depends on the circumstances.

I personally had a lust addiction, which was a separate issue in and of itself.

It wasn't because I was struggling with same-sex attraction that I had a lust issue.

And so I would encourage that individual, if you know someone that is struggling with that, to encourage them to know who they are in Christ.

And also, if they're having any other issues, to address the root of those issues.

It's not just, oh, just stop acting out, just stop watching porn, just stop having sex with people.

That's just kind of scratching the surface.

There's deeper issues there that's leading someone to want to act those things out.

So do so in a loving and compassionate way.

We're standing here sharing in order to encourage God's truth and not compromise.

So I don't want to diminish that, but we don't need to fall into sin.

You know, I think that also, Daniel, for you and for me, I would like to know from a pastoral perspective how you would answer that question.

So Pastor Bryce, would you also address why is it that somebody could pray, you know, Lord, take this away and it doesn't go away?

Well, I think both Daniel and Michael are sitting up here because God was focused on changing the heart.

And oftentimes we pray, God, help me with this behavior, help me with this behavior, and I think the prayer that we need to pray is, Lord, give me a new heart.

Because all the behavior stems from the heart.

And if God, that's where he begins the work and that's where he's gonna finish the work.

And the evidence I think is seen, I've been so blessed, even again this evening with Patty's testimony about how merciful God is in changing the heart.

And so I think that needs to be our prayer.

All right, and I think you broadened that out to an appropriate measure, because if we were just to say, it's only 1 people who struggle with a particular sin and God didn't answer that prayer.

It would be unfair to the broad spectrum of sin and we really should treat it just like you would any other.

And if you wanted to help someone in that way, I mean, if he doesn't take it, sometimes God can do miracles, but other times he's gonna teach us through it, and that gives you the ability to teach other people and help them in those situations as well.

So, and we appreciate, that's actually what's happening right here, in part, thank you.

What advice do you have for young people and media consumption?

I think I'd like to pass this 1 to, oh, Tony Scarpino.

I, February I turned off all my social media.

Scott Ritzman made a statement that he met a therapist and the therapist shared that they were working with a young person, a young adult, and she said that it was harder to ask that young adult to get rid of his phone than it was for a meth addict to get off of drugs.

And so parents, if your kids have a phone and you haven't done anything to it, devices, controls, time, they've been slimed already.

As a dad, if you have a kid that is 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, even 16 years old, they don't need a phone, okay?

Now, if you insist, please regulate their phone, their consumption time.

It's very important to keep, they need to keep, you need to keep up with your kid.

You're there to teach them and they need to learn from you, not from their phone and the social media.

A quick resource I'd like to share that may be practical for whoever asked the question or anyone else.

If you haven't heard already, there's an ominous man, I forget his name, but he has this ministry called Media on the Brain.

You guys are already familiar, so I'd encourage you to share the word to whoever may be interested.

He actually just wrote a brand new book that Amazing Facts produced called Media Mania that you can get at afbookstore.com.

If I could add something to this, I don't think that this means that you don't trust your child.

Patty mentioned this tonight, that her parents trusted her.

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