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Logo of Michigan Camp Meeting 2016: The Harvest is Great

School Success

Judy Shull

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  • June 13, 2016
    9:30 AM

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Dear Jesus we're so thankful for the safety thing and storms were so thankful for this time together and as we talk about how our children can be successful in school please be with us lead and guide us in your name you know. Well we're going to talk about school success and we're going to deal with some different concerns that I have had and parents have had talked to me about but I'm wondering what are your concerns about school and being successful. School board member what concerns you have. No Yeah. Yeah. A change of heart yeah. There of the unknown Yeah. Yes terror of the unknown. There's a lot of blame that goes around and if you kind of follow the fingers you come to a starting point or an ending point. And it's known as the blame game and sometimes parents blame the teacher and the teacher blames the parents and everybody blames the curriculum and society and if all we do is blame we're not going to get anywhere so let's take a look at what we can do to improve things Psalms one one starts out with Blessitt as the man I like to. And boy or girl who does not walk in the Council of the wicket or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers and that's what we want our boys and girls to do and. The book education has tremendous. Insight into how we should be having our own academic society and. Trying not to have our children in in with the wicked and but the wicked come into our schools so you know we have to decide how are we going to deal with that. But I highly recommend this book if anybody is looking for something to help their school there's and the really exciting stuff is our research today in education is proving what the Spirit of Prophecy said one hundred years ago was pretty exciting stuff. And. One of the things that I got to attend a class in May because we have a couple of kids at our school who who do not do well academically and we have a student coming in who has some autism we have a student other student who already has been there several years with that and so will our grade teacher and I was saying OK we got to learn how to deal you know what's new out there from the last time we took classes and this is so each went to a different class and one of the things that they brought out was there are interventions now here a teacher you know there are all kinds of interventions that the classroom can do to try and help your child succeed because they gave him you know extended due date and and well and you know we work with different children different ways because none of the children are the same and very few of them are perfect. All right I have yet to find them but still you know Heaven's coming anyway we have children who have A.D.D. attention deficit disorder H.D.A. the hyperactivity attention disorder and O.D.D. oppositional novel Defiant Disorder we've just named all kinds of things a lot of times they really are B R E T disorder and. And. You go look for different ways to to work with these kids'. Medication and we've had for years we've been talking about medication I remember going to a teacher in-service or we had a doctor who surprisingly was for medication but for years he'd been against it and his son had A.D.H. D. and he had done everything he could with his son through good diet and exercise and his son really struggled because it's an imbalance in the brain chemistry and so when the child got to college he was eighteen he went on his own and got medicated knew it from a failing student to a straight A student he said dad. Medications good. Up to a point OK So that was my first time of oh we're not totally up posing medication for kids and I've had students who have been on medication you know the day that they're not on or somebody forgot to give them their pills and a lot of times we'll ask the parent can we have a couple at school so if they forget we can just give them because I talked to one of my former students I never would have guessed she had any eighty she was just a B. student just sweetest could be. A socialite terrific kid when she got an Academy. Her brother's was in college and he. He was one who said I think I've got some problems and through all the testing he needed to have some medication and has his mom said I'm wondering if my daughter has the same issue so she took her in and ran her through some tests and they put them both on to some medication and that girl went from B. to straight A's and she said it was so nice because the buzzing quit in my head. And her older brother said the songs finally quit and I could think and hear what the teacher was saying those are the only kids I really know who can tell me the difference so medication is something that's out there and you know we don't have only promote it but it is there but here was the expressed on a fishing thing to me they said yes. If you're going to medicate it kid. It's not the school who has to change things right now the schools are doing everything that can be done to help your child. The family has to change if the medications that's going to work and then they did a list of what needed to change. Eliminate all alcohol caffeine nicotine and drugs. Caffeine you know I've got. It. I've got some kids at my school sorry you know but they like they like their caffeine not that they can have it at school but you can you can you know what they talk about her going that's not good for you it's stunt your growth you know that it doesn't seem to bother them but. Some of what some of our kids are from non-evidence homes where they're smoking going out at home and that's bothering them and so all of those kind of things have to be eliminated and then we have to not rush them. They have to be protected from being rushed all the time. OK. All right will work on that one more protein less carbohydrates OK because carbohydrates go to sugar and you know what happens there. I be. Avoiding always hurrying them always being late always saying we got to go faster we get kids are moving at a different pace and some kids need to have a different and it's you know we're talking with one family maybe they need to spend two years in a great you know that might be a necessity. Just because. There are some foundational things missing in art class but the children who have eighty and eighty. O.D.D. may need to not be rushed as much not have that time pressure put on by those. And then. They need to get their heart rate up thirty to forty five minutes a day five days a week. Wow You know this is what we've been saying all along you've got the sixty minute group with the football players saying get your kids out there playing hard for sixty minutes a day they're saying unless you can medicate your kid but unless you're doing the rest of these things that medication isn't in a do what it needs to do. But children need to be out getting good exercise thirty to forty five minutes a day and that's outside of school we're not talking about what we do and do with them at school you know we get them going pretty hot and sweaty but. We need to go home and still be active and then. Avoid excess of video games maximum of thirty minutes a day and you know what they're doing instead of getting their exercise so they're saying you got it you got. To limit and that's not something we can go to school as something that has to be done at home and then the next one is no more than two hours of screen time a day so what if they're using an i Pad at school they could easily use up their two hours of screen time they're watching a T.V. or playing a video games that two ours of screen time includes a half hour of video games. So they have to really because they're finding that the screen time is causing sleep issues. As taking away from the exercise is taking away from getting the medicine going through their brain the properly and. Two hours of screen time a day maximum. I'm sitting there going. You know if parents did that I'm not sure they need the medication you know. And they should turn off all screens T.V. I've had I've. Fallen two hours before sleep. If you have a kid and they and that's as good for all children but especially any child who has a medication. They need to be able to do that and then they need to get proper sleep. And I'm looking at that list going. You know that's what we've been telling parents for ever and now we have research to back it up and this was just this was just one slide of an all day presentation on how to deal with its with issues but to me that was it really jumped out now are lower grades teacher also intended. A child brain activity and she said that one of the things they they taught was teach the children how to cope with stress so that may be where you want to be and. I can send you some information if you leave your name and. Address but we need to be teaching kids actively coping strategies so that if they're having meltdowns at school and that happens in some of our lower grades. What is it that we can do to help them cope now I would share all of that with you but it's a book about that big but if you would like a little bit of information leave me a name and an address and I'll send it to but those are things you know it could be a simply as going through that previous list of getting pressure on exercise and and getting to bed and getting funny a sleep in those kind of things and then digestion. Children have problems if their have digestion issues and we have more of this global issues and and nut issues and. Mel allergies and it's all out there and so if your child is having some problems it may be because they are having some digestion issues so that was being something to check on we had a student this year who started having some problems and discover they need to be who prayed and then their concentration went way out because they weren't dealing with the stomach issues this is why I'm excited to be able to share some of these things with you as those are some of the things that can lead to some issues with chips and good for you we we never let our sons I have two grown sons now but when I was teaching early on. I was around I was a young teacher the year that video games came out at Christmas time remember that year at all. And in January I'm watching kids' grades just tank you know A grades to ask B. grades to ask degrades to ask. And I started having parent teacher conferences with these parents saying I'm not sure what's happening your child is doing so well and what I learned is all of the children having academic problems had video games they had all gotten them that Christmas so then I went back and talk to the parents thinking you know that might be an issue and if the parent put the game away until summer the kids grades came back a. One parent put the game away except on weekends and their grades hovered around C. but at least they were up from F. but one parent couldn't get the kid couldn't get his grades back up finally the parents found out that they had moved the game to a station into another room. And he was getting up in the middle of the night and playing while they were sleeping so now or come pounding that imagery plus lack of sleep so they put that one under lock and key when they found that out but you know having experienced that my sons were never allowed to play video games it was OK let's teach you how to touch type for years and then my you know my husband was an architect said well let's let's learn computer programming if you want to do something on the computer now that you can type you can can so they were programming about third third grade and then they said OK dad this is going a little boring OK let me teach you how to CAD draft so they learned how to do computer. Yes and they could do all of that and once they master that then they started doing three D. imaging on their way I have no idea what they're doing but they could do three D. modeling and. Then they went to college and. One of them had a roommate who wants to just play games all day and my older son said nope can't do that and the guy ended up going home. At Christmas because anybody flaking. But he was he was with a group of guys who were there to learn. But you know when they went to college and they had to take a drafting class and had to learn computer aided design there to our labs last about twenty minutes and they said. How could you do that. Well my dad made me learn the some fifth grade you know. But it has held them in good stead and it was not until college that they understood why Mom and Dad had said that for so long so no matter what you're doing you know if the Lord is impressing you hold fast to that and explain you know you might not know this now but one day you're going to appreciate this and I know it doesn't make any sense now but it is going to make a difference. Things to avoid our allergens our kids if they're allergic to something this can this can activate the eighty and eighty eighty the O.D.T. oppositional defiant and allergens can be anything from the hand sanitizer we have of use it could be. Environmental. So if you want fragrance free things if you think that might be an issue it could be the pollens there are so many allergens out there and try and figure out what to do to help your children and the toxins again. Then same thing as we just talked about they've got to exercise and they've got a sleep those are two huge components that need to be occurring with our children and not sleeping in class that's not what we're talking about. I work with a teacher once and he was teaching an academy and he would say well you're either going to come into my. Class and learn something or wake up refreshed. And then let's watch what they take in less washed their nutrient are they getting a good balanced diet and then what kind of drugs you know we've got to be careful with what our kids are taking are they will pay allergy medication are they taking is that causing us on the eighty and eighty H.T. and work with the doctors and a lot of times with diet my younger son huge pollen allergies when like every tree. In the spring he's allergic to and no medication helps but if you get honey. That's produced by the bees locally and you use that honey that helps alleviate a lot of the pollen allergies. And has to be local You can't just go to the grocery store and get it you have to go to a local beekeeper because you got it it's it's the allergy allergens that are in your area but that worked for him nothing else did and we went through a lot but. Another thing that my younger son started doing is he would shower every night and make sure he washed his hair because and then he would cover his pillow during the day make sure that was covered because of you know what comes in you have open windows and. So those are some things that if our kids are struggling those are some things we can do and this one is just to help you remember it's part P. A R.T.. If that helps you at all and I'm going to give you that screen shot and the other one that was before it but the exciting thing was as we looked at them both Mrs Robinson and I had the same thought separate classes separate days but we said. Over one. Or do years. Ellen like you this is the seven keys to happiness and we call it a new start. And let's take a look at how that resembles what we just looked at we know we need to have good nutrition we know we need to have exercise we know we need to have water inside and out whether you know proper bathing plenty of drinking we know we need sunshine did you know that when sunshine shines on. Cancer cells it kills the cancer cells so all this worry about being in the sunshine when we need to go back to what the Spirit prophecy says in moderation and all things but we do need sunshine we need temperance goes right back to you know the alcoholic half being the drugs we need fresh air. We need rest you know and sleep. And we need trust and divine power which I thought was just incredibly exciting to say to differ and lets us Robinson felt the same way she said all I could think of those new start as we went through this. Past. I remember having to memorize that list when I was in Academy this was one of the big Bible class assignment you always had to know this and why it has really paid off to memorize that and have that in front of me. Again so I'm going to take you back to the book education because again science is proving what we were told. Well one of the things I've learned is parents need to be the parent not the child sometimes we have children. Who think they're the boss right you've seen those kids don't let that happen to your little one. Parent psychology. I know if I have I smile at my grandmother she'll do anything for me and. Parents are the leaders of the home and we need to teach our children responsibility and it's it's like teaching my dog that she can only do certain things that she can't go out and bark at the neighbor's dog and their yard you know or she needs to stay close by we do the same thing with the granddaughter you need to take my hand we're going to go cross the street and you need to look both ways and this is a twenty month year old twenty month old child and just trying to start teaching that responsibility if you hold somebody see and you hold on to things. And in the process of teaching them responsibility we're teaching them self-esteem for years self-esteem was a big issue that you know we can't have a person second place we can't have honor society we can't do this because some of these self-esteem is going to be hurt you know if we're teaching our children responsibility and were helping them know that they can excel at something children excel at something they my excel at academics you know. They might excel at social they might be the one who befriends everybody. They might be the one who has the very best help or they can't can't seem to get their schoolwork done they annoy everybody but they're right there to help you every time so where to look for ways to build self-esteem in children individual and not just count academics as one part of it but there's a whole bunch that goes into raising a child. Parents need to be in charge. Too many times I've seen parents leave decision making to their seven or ten year old child. What do you mean you didn't get enough sleep last night well I don't want to go to bed. OK Whose decision is that you know a growing up my kids or a bad because I knew they needed ten to twelve hours of sleep a night. And. So I was just you're going to go to bed and if you lay there in the dark in the quiet. You will get seventy percent of the rest you need because I can't go to sleep OK That's OK as long as it's dark and quiet you're good you can stay awake all night if you want but you're in the dark and in the quiet I may have let him sleep a little too much because I've got one who's six foot five and the other one's six foot. So are a little bit concerned that maybe. And my six foot eight son Academy was sitting next to a girl who really loved her cat. And loved to stay up late in one day finally just looked at her and said you know that stunts are growth no it doesn't and then when they stood up she came to about his waist and he said Are you sure you know but we need to not leave those the surgeons to our kids we've we have more life experience we have more understanding hopefully we have more maturity and being a parent is tough. Yesterday I had the opportunity to go to my twenty one month old granddaughters one in class. Yes you sticking swimming and she has a ten minute some in class every day five days a week and the first time I want was last week and she cried a lot and she screamed you know or. No more and you know grandmother sitting there going. I can't see her you know when the swimming teacher I'm a lifeguard want to go save her she's coughing and spluttering but I'm watching the teacher unhappy with the teacher she knows the want to do what the teacher says. Got to go yesterday. And she was doing everything the teacher said to her bath she can be on her stomach and get Tura back she can grab the side what they're teaching her has to be seen if it was her choice she would never have a sewing lesson. But that's not what her mom and dad said we want you water safe we want we want to be out in Lake Michigan with you we want to go swimming with you we need you to be safe so they were the parents and they made a tremendously difficult decision to put their little girl in a swimming class that she was not enjoying that look like when this when that every baby there when they would get done with their lesson they would put them up on the side on a nice blanket towel and cover them with another towel and pat their back every one of those kids just lay there. Not moving now my granddaughter is always moved. That was a still a side ever seen. OK the first time right how much water did she so hope but you know after about eight or nine minutes she's OK and you know get her dressed and get going. Parents made a really tough decision and that's just the beginning of all the tough decisions that a parent has to make and we need to not have our children in control of our families does that mean they're not a part of the decision making no the older they get the more you want to discuss things with them and have them help you decide this year we took a Muley neat class trip and we got to go up north. To Traverse Bay Area and we actually got on a ship that sailed under full sail and the kids learned how to sail it. But I didn't tell them what their trip was going to be they kept telling me what they wanted to do sometimes it involved in using the carts and so now we're going to do what I want to do and I'll just take you along because I'm going to have fun and you can have fun if you want but what are we going to do should we and the year before we go on down to the Creation Museum now been totally awesome they were ready to go back to that no we did that last year we're going to do something else and it took so working out finally we broke the news to him. And I just sat there and stared at us like. We're not sure about this but afterwards and I talked to him about it they just said it was going to be an unknown they were on permille year with the things they were going to do and at the let you know one of the last things we did was we visit to the Music Museum up at Traverse City. The music museum some of my students said that was the best part of the trip outside of getting to go on the schooner the sailing ship but they had love that. But that was my decision it wasn't their decision on what we were going to do even though I couldn't say you know they said can we bring sport games and have a game night yeah we could do that. You know we can have pizza and yeah we'll go to Taco Bell you know they can have some input alternately who's going to make the choice well because I'm a teacher whatever I do I want to be teaching something and so I wanted to make sure it was a learning activity and I learned a lot as they did too Proverbs tells us in. Chapter thirteen burst twenty four whoever spares the rod hates their children but one who loves their children is careful to discipline them now I'm not in for spanking. Kids I am so glad teachers don't have to spank children I did not even like trying to get my own son's attention and my husband and I one day said to respond in the voice. And you know we came up with maybe four times where the strong willed had to get a little bit of attention but. Spanking as a the only thing that Iraq is a rod is for steering you know a shepherd doesn't go beyond his sheep a step Shepherd will use that rod to guide them and that's what I think that Solomon's telling us is if we're not guiding our children and disciplining them and and disciplining is just another word for disciple ing them if we're not showing them the way then do we really love them as a cut and then and Chapter nineteen verse eighteen discipline your children for that or in that there is hope Do not be willing party to their death parents who do not and I'm going to say teachers who do not if we're not directing our kids we're not going to happen one day they're going to choose a different path. Yes now. What's talk about the hopeless pursuit of perfection. OK this this is a definite issue. And we see it with the kids. It's all or nothing I must be perfect. These children could be your slobs they could be poor students they're usually discouraged perfectionists they give up trying because it hurts too much to fail. Fighting and arguing or acts of cooperation it takes to cooperate. All children need encouragement more than prodding for many learning problems the real issue is attitude and and children who aren't getting things done could be. Depressed perfectionists So it starts out it must be perfect we just had a science fair. You could tell who the kids were who it had to be perfect. Because it was going to be perfect or nothing else. There they were sure they could do anything you'd listen to their projects and you'd say let's break this down a little bit and get a little bit more realistic you know that's really neat. And none of us have a Ph D. in what you're talking about so it's not going to I'm not going be able to help you with this. Then the child gets into and says how to get into this I'll never be able to get it all done. I know it head of been better I could I blew it I am what I do the only thing that counts is results performance and I'll try harder I know I can do better than that and it just is a vicious cycle any of you know any kids like that. Yeah. And they're in our school and they're not getting anything done and this is your second hand up you know that. They can't get anything done because they get stuck and if it's not perfect if it's not phenomenal it's not good enough. And then in order to justify to themselves failure they never finish it I had a student who would never turn in a math paper. Because they were so afraid it would be wrong well you know at least do it so I do two or three problems so I know whether you're doing the right let me look at him I'm here to help you. And and we try to do that we try to look at them closely we try that to get to them but when you have a child who's who's really struggling it could be perfectionism that's getting in their way now Seventh Day Adventists we aim for perfection right we're hoping to be. Good citizens of God's kingdom but are we going to be perfect here on Earth know those that mean we're failures No but our children need to be trained in that and that can we use the failures not so much as. You know or you feel that this but what what have we learned if I waited until I felt I was good enough at something. I would never do anything and and that has been a really good thing for me is I could be frozen in what I'm doing or I could do my best and you know what I've said over and over to kids something's better than the. Do something. And do do you know OK so you're afraid you're not going to be able to do it do something give me something because they're caught in this perfectionism and so not doing it is not her still failure because I just didn't do it I ran out of time. That's not me. Moving on how do you reinforce those disappeared behaviors one is role modeling is is children a look at us how are we doing that with things am I getting stressed about how I got so much to do well then the kids start picking up on that oh I've got so much homework oh dear there I taught that to them that was not what I wanted to teach them. Well and one of the things I started doing. Ninth and tenth grade is for a while when we would do the newsletter. I would have them do the proofreading so when I get all done I say OK I need to prove this nothing brings greater joy than buying the stake the teacher made and I make plenty and they would give it back to me all marked up and I go oh so much I saw appreciate that and that that's one thing with your kids a say OK you know when I when I write it in my head it's real this is the way it is and when I read it it's what I saw in my head but when you read it as what I actually put down the same things happen with you and your assignments so if you get your mom or dad who reads the hoary before you turn it in because in your head you got it the way it should be but that might not be what your fingers did. And you know just teaching them that it's OK You know when that would happen and I would not get upset I just you know I don't want that newsletter to go out like that no no. And so then we can help each other and teach each other let's help each other with this I don't want to send anything out without somebody else looking at it for me because chances are I would overlook something. Good good help is hard to get but when you can find it. I remember an academy I made my dad always read my papers you know look this over make sure that I've got the square magically because he knew all the grammar. And so he could look it over for me and say well you need this. Really appreciate that and in sarcasm need to find somebody who they can say Mom look over this math now. Parents can't look over math so much anymore with our massive Aries but if they come. Is that right down to it but you know you can check the multiplication the division the dition and if you need to pull your calculator do that but go ahead and double check them and say why don't you fix this one in the sun you know because I do that at school I look over their math and go Well these five look really good but I think you want to look at these two again and then I'll check oh you know because the goal is not to mark something wrong the goal is to learn how to do something. And that's what we have to help them understand the goal is to learn how to be successful and to be successful. We have to do the things that we don't want to do like my granddaughter not wanting to put her face in the water not wanting to you know have to turn over a. I when you get to success the joy there is just huge and self-esteem comes along with that but it was the trial and error that got us to that point. We need to be honest with our kids oh you're brilliant maybe you're not. But can you try hard did you do your best it did was it hard. Not was a hard time to have to talk to that teacher because I'm not sending you to that school to just do easy stuff oh I learned this a little less today don't talk to my teacher but. But you know when they come on so. Yes I want you to learn I watch it and when I not understanding it well what a better place to be than at school if you're not understanding it. Yeah. Yeah that one. And it's so easy to go. That was good you're doing you're working hard I'm really proud of how hard you're working even though it was hard you put your effort into it I can tell that took a lot of energy. I think you're doing much better today than yesterday you know and we've got to come up with those creative ways to to help them but one of the the neat things that I was reading about was we've got to help kids so to be willing to do the hard stuff. And so not saying you're a great artist. Tell me about this that's really neat the way you shared that and getting them to give us more feedback and that's hard to retrain ourselves to do those kind of things but when we praise we're looking exactly at how are we praising. Are we praising effort or success we really need to praise effort. Oh wow you did this whole page it all wrong I can see you put a lot of work into it we should have done more at school cause then I could have helped you before it got this bad you know I'm not going to say that to him but it's this is why we do things in class so that when you go home you know how to do that but yeah let's find things to praise you are the best helper. I was just up getting canned goods. Best helper in the world came along to help me. Train in the last five years. But even his boss was saying his amazing helper but you spent a lot of time saying you're so good at helping you. This. Look at what happens you know always will have a job because you know how the hell. Then let's talk about rest I was I was reading. Something. Top one hundred scientific research breakthroughs this last year and one of them is they have found something in the brain that's kind of a cleaner that cleans out but it only does that when we're in sleep not when we're resting but only when we're in sleep and they're beginning to wonder if some of the Alzheimer's and dementia is coming about because people didn't get proper rest and sold all that cleaning that gets done in the brain isn't getting done through the years. And in big trouble I got to get more sleep but that's the only time that happens is when we are sound asleep. In a good sleep not just a nap or rest but good because it takes a couple hours to get into it it starts cleaning out the plaque and things in our brains and our children need to learn that and and we need to role model it this is really tough because as parents and as teachers we need to get proper rest. That time needs to be consistent and the best way to do that is bedtime routines had a have a granddaughter and like to go sleep. That earlier but the routines and the place. Have family were shipped. Go get a bath. Your teeth brushed your dramas on and then you lay down and go to sleep every night same time every day same time. Writing nights same thing set. Same thing and that consistency and that routine then makes bedtime easy and they start getting so tired about that time too because that's what their body has gone into a routine now you and I we love disruptions from routine. The younger the child the more the routine they need. Lack of sleep is a problem does lack of sleep lead to eighty S a question out there sleep deprived children experience abnormal brainwaves. Those brain waves look like the brain waves of an A.T.V. child. So they're saying OK is sleep deprivation leading to our attention is that chemical imbalance disorders. Or. Because the explosion of attention deficit disorder came out about the same time as video games. So kids was not getting as much sleep but when you look at it preschoolers need eleven to thirteen hours they're not getting it all at once because they have naps still but they're needing half their day in sleep school aged kids need ten to eleven hours of sleep a night every night. They're not getting it no wonder they're having some focus issues. Television or screen time we've talked about limiting the amount of that to. Two hours max game time thirty minutes are right I would say television half an hour X.. Yes And if you're going to let your kids watch T.V. you watch whatever they're watching. Just make sure that. My brother. Had a little boy and one time. I was talking to him on the phone and said one of my hearing so much in Barney with my son. Now my brother is not a Barney kind of person. Said yeah we used to watch the teen age Ninja Warrior Tribbles or something and then my son kicked a hole through the drywall Well now we watch porn. So he had taken to heart you've got to watch with your kids what they're watching because two hours of that you're not going to do half an hour I remember sitting with the kids watching it going. To do this for half an hour. Would you guys like to go play a game can we go outside let's go ride bikes you know because it's not it's not me. That's their whole evening. Exactly. Getting enough sleep yeah. Well that's that's what the world is saying is limit it to two hours because kids are watching more than that I'm saying. Half an hour maybe an hour of. Whatever they're doing train them to analyze what they're seeing there is so much lying there's so much wrong that once you go through and say look look what he's doing to tell the truth if she following what the Bible says to do you're going to find less and less to be able to watch but we need to train them to analyze because one day they're going to go out on their own one of my best friends I grew up I entered university we were the evil family in the. Neighborhood because we had a television. So when the moon landing King the whole neighborhood was in. Our basement. But my friend who was never allowed television at her house because they were much better than we were when she got out on her own she became addicted for the next ten years television everything she said I watched everything I could get anything done and it was so absorbing me I grew up knowing there was nothing on T.V. so it wasn't an issue but for her so we need to be training our kids which is why I think maybe half an hour you know for days and weeks is probably OK but we've got to train them with what they're seeing what they're watching so that they learn how to analyze what they're seeing we used to do this with books used to train children how to analyze what they're reading and that's OK to put down a book if it's not appropriate we need to teach them it's OK to turn off the T.V. if it's not appropriate. As a teacher please don't send your kid to school without breakfast it's like starting out on a trip without putting fuel in the car you're not going to get very far. And the best the best piece of advice I had for my own kids was after supper they don't get to eat anymore and you know don't go over to supper so that they can get up and eat breakfast lunch well actually three pack by the parents I know that we try and train our kids to take care of themselves a seven year old doesn't have good sense I had some twelve year olds that I saw this last year who. You put one in your lunch fourteen year olds how many desserts do you have do you have anything besides or Well that's all we had. Parents need to be you know you might put out you've got this this this and this and you can put it in your own lunch and get it there but parents need to be supervising what goes into the lunch not the kids if they're going to come to teach snack. Which they were pretty hard at school they're going to come home hungry I mean we come up we end the day hungry but the kids are going to end up hungry because they've used a lot of mental ability and I'm so glad to see the billboards out there saying Change your child snack for good I love it get out get on the fruit get on the. Carrot celery sticks and things. Oversee that and then supper supper needs to be family time turn the television off sit down as a family asked this is another really good suggestion as talk to them about challenges you face so you can say I had this really tough problem at school and this is how I solved it I went and I talk to this teacher and and then you take them step by step on how you solve the problem so it wasn't just oh everything went well with dad today it was Dad had a problem a school and now you're teaching them the steps on how to solve the problem. Which I thought was a fantastic suggestion. Oh. What a good suggestion. Being a parent is not for the weak their children want your presence they want you around they want their parents' attention in a wrong almost out of time so I'm not going to get lengthy stories in there but kids want their parents even when they say oh you know I don't want you. Around they really do they want memories with you they want to spend time with you. As parents we've got to say no there are too many times where yes would be easier. For now no as no was. Just something we got to do we can find different ways to say it. We need to be that strong routines our success automatically. That which we persist in doing becomes easier not that the nature of the task has changed but our ability to do has has increased and Emerson's share that with us another words when you have a routine when they get home from school and they get their exercise when they sit down with their schoolwork when they eat their supper when they go to the bedtime routines the more you keep them in that cycle the easier it gets I know of what time of day I need to grade papers if I try and grade them at a different time I have to battle for fifteen minutes to get my mind to grading it but if I wait until my regular grading paper time. I'm in I'm done and that's. It schoolwork. Quick because we're almost out of time why you know if you're not sure why your child has that homework check with their teacher where homework should be done under parental supervision don't send them to their room to do it on their own when put it into a routine. Who does the homework the child the parent does not I have you left but I have had parents who have done a parents who have done their child's school work up until they get to sixth grade and then suddenly neither them nor the child can do their math. Because the child never learned and mom had done it for them and that becomes very evident in fifth and sixth grade so make sure the child is doing the whole. More. What are they doing whatever you know it's been assigned again talk to the teacher about it at they if you go home say my fourth graders two hours of homework every night in the teacher need to sit down figure out something different that's too much because they need that playtime. Now you know. You need to you need to get some balance in there because the children we talked about all the things children need to do a good in sleep and that's what's hard with my ninth and tenth graders trying to convince them you need to get to sleep you're actually going to do better if you get up early to finish your homework than if you stay up late try convincing a fifteen year old them that. Needs to be done and neatly timely and regularly. Rolls routines and relationships the last one we talked about parents we talked about routines and here are your partners for success team up with your near family members my kids would have a messy room all I had to do is say your grandmother is coming to visit Of course I call grandmother and make sure she could come over grandmother's coming to visit and take her about an hour to get here and you know that room would always be clean before grandmother got there because there was not a chance they're going to have Grandmother see a messy room mom not a problem I would just I learned to shut the door because that was not worth an argument but any time I mention a grandparent coming. It was spectacular. So teaming up yet your teachers get the coaches get the assistance to help you every kid has somebody who's going to be their hero every find the person who is unbelievably excited about your child because that's the person it could be a sad as cool teacher it could be their schoolteacher somebody is going to just think they're Europe. Child is wonderful and every child needs that person. The pastor saddest co-leaders Pathfinder leaders adventure leaders all of those people can help like I'm an approachable adventures and saddest school in Pathfinders at school we can promote school at their events too and they can say well I have to do this for Pathfinders Well good to talk to your Pathfinder leader and see if we can work this out together so that you know you still have a life. Because let's not be separate entities let's work together for our children say and then. Children's children are crowned the aged in parents are the pride of their children. We want our children us to be proud of them but they want to be proud of us are we doing what God has allowed us to do. Because where do we want to be this is where we want to be with our families and I count the school kids as my families they're there I spend a lot of time with them so they can become very close I want to have prayer so I know some of you need to leave and then if anybody wants their own talk. Their Jesus we thank you for our time together we're looking forward to success and many areas help us to find that with each of the children Lord and there are ways that we can help children more put it on our hearts and minds and give us the strength to be the kind of leaders in our in our schools that you would have us be in your need. 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