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Logo of Love in the Making

Single and Satisfied

Eugene Preval

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This session explores the necessity of seeing the beauty of being single and avoiding the haphazard mistakes we create in relationships. We will see the value men need of possessing the healthy mind and self-image of our example Jesus Christ. 

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  • April 21, 2018
    4:15 PM
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My father in heaven I would like to say thank you again for us being here we X. There you can be with us Lord to also see the practical applications things that we can avoid and how we should model our lives after the man Christ Jesus in His name we X. in Jesus' name. Isaiah chapters 3 let's go there were quick the book of Isaiah chapters 3. Now what I did in the 1st 1. I basically summarize the thing that is bombarding men. Same Kes that are preventing us from living up to the image their God designed for us to live. What we saw is that 1 of the key factors that men have trouble being single is because they desire to be with a partner but because we're in 2018 social media it has actually created more pressure for us to enjoy the Christian experience of being single and satisfied it's wrecking our lives secretly. But also too is that when we are constantly wrecking our lives and going to these social websites it is not just then you can go to parties etc But what's happening is 2 is that because we're longing to be with someone especially what happens is that we tend to because we're not receiving that we tend to go into pornography sadly. And as a result we're creating a castle building imagination in our minds of things that are not real we have to live in reality. But also to know that there is a missing link you know that it's really affecting men of having a healthy relationship. With themselves with their Lord Jesus Christ's more poorly with women too in general whether it's you're in a relation with a woman or just with the friendship because we tend to be sneaky you know we were very familiar with women at times and it's not appropriate. And 1 of the key things that I truly believe that can help a man to literally have a good disposition and congregating with both sexes and demonstrating Christianity that is in crisis if 1st stands with his having a healthy relationship with his father you know there's a lot of definitions of the question was X. What is a man for me I truly believe it involves responsibility there's many answers but I truly believe it's a responsibility. A father's 1 of his primary objectives is to teach men how to be a responsible individuals especially when it comes to governance and organization structure as well as security and provided a protection for whatever he's governing whether it's a family whether he has his own business the list goes on that's why man was designed for when God bought Adam to the scene everything was under his dominion this is where we see a blueprint model of authority as well as responsibility. But sadly I want to see a prophecy that the prophet Isaiah saw that God revealed to him and we're seen it today notice what it says in the book of Isaiah chapter story Isaiah chapter 3 and a says in verse 1 this is a very crucial pitcher and he reads For behold the Lord the Lord of Hosts do of take away from Jerusalem and from Judah the stay and a staff the whole stay of bread and the whole stay of water notice verse 2 why God has taken away this the mighty men the men of war the judge the profits the prudent and the agent the captain of 15 the Arnold then the counselor the cunning artificer and the eloquent order ter a nurse's wrist for I will give children to be their princes and they use shall rule over them and the people shall be oppressed everyone by another and every 1 by his neighbor the child behaves himself proudly against the engine other was disrespecting them. And the base against audible when the man shall take hold of his brothers of the house of his father saying that has clothing be there our ruler let us do this let this ruin be under my hand notice as a verse 7 in that day shall he swear saying I will not be a healer for in my house is neither bread nor clothing make me not a ruler of the people what is verse 7 telling us. What is Real 7 telling us here. The absence of leadership men not taking a stand for Drusilla is ruined and Judah is falling because their tongue and their doings are guess the lore to provoke the eyes of his glory notice what is says in verse 12. As for my people. What does say children are their suppressors and what women rule over them of my people which carboy of my people they which lead the cause deter Erm and destroy the way of the i Pad's. The Lord standeth up to plead you know a God is doing his pleading he's begging for the man to take your law and stand up and be a man this is what God is going through do you know that Christ is suffering a lot because of the state of the church. But they are not man standing up to have backbone to say sin is sin and righteousness is righteousness remember Eli. Remember the story of Eli it was because of his sons doing a lot of wickedness that Israel acts God let us have a king like other nations in fact you know it didn't even start with Eli Eli It was a product that Samuel picked up even Samuel himself did not rule over his sons and that's when the people say you know we're tired of this we need a king tool over us we're tired of this leadership this priesthood. Notice what us as it goes forward. In verse 16 when you read all the way down is speaks of the women the daughters of Zion on. They're the ones that are ruling the church now I'll tell you this much I truly believe that women have beautiful area of ministry of doing things I truly believe that they can teach they also can preach except. But when we don't see the men out there as an authoritative figure before the congregation especially for the young ones the young boys that are growing up what they're seeing is not leadership in Christianity they're going to start viewing their minds of leadership that is in the world I want to be that businessman a Wall Street I want to be that rapper I want to be that sports superstar and it's creating a domino effect of not it's having. A stable home you know why could you imagine that a young man who grows up. He doesn't know how to care for his whole his ideology of what a home is is what he's viewing on television his view of how to treat women is according to the movies and television and as a result when he has a home and a whole he brings a child into this world according to what we just saw the statistics the absence of father and then he comes to the position where he cannot take care of that child and you know what happens then that child that grows up in a single home a mother raising and doesn't have the father figure in the whole and you know have has that child because the father's not there they're going to be the son speaking him emotionally unstable specificially mentally so they're going to go in society and trying to discover and explore the world. Literally a bait a prey to Satan and then this consistency of this domino effect do you see those a pattern going over the over and over again is consistent sadly now. Solomon. Counsel his son in Chapter 5 of Proverbs notice what he says to his son which is very very crucial I want to look at this right over here let's go to Proverbs chapters 5 the Book of Proverbs chapters 5 and I want to tell you something a lot of us assume that masculinity involves strength. And masculinity evolves having excellent career. I work for a corporate I'm an executive that's the masculinity in reality and we're going to look at a little later. As a result we try to take advantage of individuals because of our dominance and our power but in reality that was never into God's intention that it's mind frame or that image is how the world operates. Because you say that you don't want to do things this is your way this is how you're going to do it you know what happened is going to cause rain now to try to step up and fill in the gap. Of failure on your part causes ruin in society. Always remember this now I want to look at Proverbs Chapter 5 Notice what is here in verse 1 solid A speaking to his son a father son relationship it reads my son hand until my wisdom bound by ear to my understanding take my wisdom and pay close attention and understand. That you may regard discretion and I your lips may keep knowledge you know what it says in verse 3 this is what he said the 1st thing that a father can tell us on the father who is why Sue have experience of life who he knows what can take out a man the strongest man that ever lived was taken out by 1 of the wisest men that has ever live 2nd to Jesus he his reputation was nearly ruined and it was because of women and praise God he's you know will see him in a king of Solomon but Solomon's give him concrete counsel concerning concerning his mistakes he says this in verse 3 for the what lips of the stranger woman drop as a honeycomb and her mouth is what smoother than oil but her end is bitter as wormwood sharp as a 2 edged sword her feet goes where. Down to death her steps take hold of what Hell less dowsers pondered the path of life her ways are movable that thou canst not know them the 1st thing that a father can tell a son literally beware of the strange woman. I don't care how many degrees or letters you have in a back of your name I don't care how much scriptures you can quote I have seen men personally myself and we all have have been taken down because of this the lack of self control when in contact with a woman. And you know the enemy knows this he knows your weakness he studies you 6000 years this is a scientists in the making Satan he knows your every move because he watches you he knows all this brother likes light skinned girls are right amount to play 1 coming in church oh. OK he likes Hispanics OK He knows everything that you like he's attracted so women who were short skirts Oh he would so he sees everything and everything this is serious now but I want to go through so few passes or scriptures notices 1 right over here. It says this and by the way I also want to set the record that. God in the church we sometime assume that because we're in church that the ladies are harmless but I want to let you know that this terminology present truth has been abused this term and I truly believe that it has its true meaning but at times when you are in a circle of cortical present truth there are people there are literally sheeps and and will scalding actually scuse me was a Seems clothing Thank you. Do not allow the crown of the head to the sole of the feet deceived you the whole long dress and everything do not buy it that's why it is very important for us to seek the Lord and be in tune with the Spirit because I can tell you stories and the Lord altered my eyes be careful and hold my hands because you cannot walk into this world yes with safety notice what it says in providence of resistance 18 as we progress on because I know my time is going to deliver the from a strange woman even from the stranger which flooded with with her words notice what it says right over here proverbs 5 US 3 and 5 we just read that. Are probably 7 verse 5 that die may keep the from the strange woman from the stranger which flatter with her words this as a Proverbs 22 verse 14 the mouth of a strange woman is a deep pit and he'd that is what a horror of the Lord saw for there in the brother who is not connected in Christ's he's going to fall to that will be trap I remind you we are stimulated. By what we see. She can just communicate to you from a distance and get you excited from a distance it's that serious Be careful with her words Now notice this it goes even further now Jesus gives counsel in a book of Matthew's chapters 5 I truly believe that Jesus Christ is 1 of the greatest example of how a man should conduct himself self control. And as a result he says in Matthew's chapters 5 reading from verses 28 is says but I since you the who serve a look at upon a woman to lusts after her. Have committed adultery already with her in his heart and you know what he says of verse 9 and 30 we know the classic statement of verse 28 but in verse 29 of verse 30 he says verse $29.00 and if if Fendi you know is supposed to pluck it out and cast a from do you know what that means it means guard the avenues of your eyes literally shun it and notice what it says even further verse 30 and if I write Hannah Fendi cut it off don't even dare to touch her because you'll be out of control you'll be powerless I'll never forget that experience it's real now notice job 31 verse 1 I have made a covenant with my eyes why Densher I lost fully after young lady I like the N.I.V. looking juice as why this and I think a point to make think means to desire or imagine things. Proverbs chapters 20 Proverbs Chapter 6 verse 24 to 26 as says this key deform the evil within from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman then it says verse 25 loss not after her beauty and dying heart neither let her take the by her islands you know she's going to sea and we catch you. Because yes and then she you know I was literally on my way here at the airport literally I'm waiting for my luggage the baggage is are going to come around you know and if you see a luggage going to pick it up. A very attractive woman she sees me standing there you know as she does she passes by constantly trying to grab my attention. I presume for Jesus because you know what I did I literally moved I moved. I pulled a Joseph of a man that was part of his life you have to have their disposition and it's only in Christ where you can do is because I'm beyond a search you if I'm not in Christ's I'm going to be tempted to try to talk to her. So I'm going to go because the time notice what it says right over here. Now the Bible counsels us in regards to how we supposed to guard the atoms of our souls is says does not is what it says a 1st person such as 5 or $22.00 abstain from all appearance of evil if you see it clear cut the Spirit convicts you take the step to avoid it notice what it says right over here exit is $23.00 verse 7 Keep the FAR from a false matter. And our proverbs such as for verse 14 to 50 and turn not into the path of the wicked and gold not in the way of the evil men of void it pass not by it turn from it and pass away you're the Bible trying to tell us of void putting yourself in your position where this is what's going to happen Proverbs 4 excuse me it's going to this is Roman stuff the 4 for 16 let not then your good be evil spoken off if you do not keep your distance from committing temptation in Christ's your good is going to be evil spoken of notice this 1 right over here this is probably suffers for verse 25 I love this when you know why you know what it says let down eyes look what look right on and let down eyelids look straight before the you know when I was in I think it was a high school yeah you can see me high school you know the brothers we like to turn our necks and whenever a woman passed by I would just like to it's called the breaking of the neck that was a slang right and of that I don't know if they still use those terms break your neck why is going to wobble and wonder you know and especially when you hear the high heels the clicking noise quickly you automatically Tarsus have to pass by you you just look at from afar what she looks like. Yes exactly. And I'll be honest with you. You know you know there was a man he. He wanted. You know a trick the guys or what he did was he wore high heels and he was walking down the hallway also New York all the guys they literally looked internally so it was a medal that Marci. Literally the Bible counsels us. Look straight don't turn to the left or to the right keep your eyes focus. And you notice how the Bible is costly giving us counsel especially to be very careful how you conduct yourself because the enemy knows that you don't have self-control and it goes for 2nd critics of the 6 verse 3 giving no offense in anything that the ministry may not what may not be blamed. You know there's a there's a lot of men that I've respected entire past I still listen to them I've heard stories of how they fall in. But you know it's a sad reality we live in a world where people do not practice forgiveness and as a result do not see them the way they saw them before the fall as a result Paul counsels be careful that the ministry that you're in May not be blame this is serious notices next 1 he's a survivor story before an occasion and uncleanness or coverage is let a not be once name among you as saints they come be a damage to Christ people have been led away from practicing Christianity because they saw someone dead mire and as a result they were disgusted and at times people view crisis in his saints and that's or not be the case. And that ministry is hindered the everlasting Gospel God is pleading with them in Isaiah Chapter 3 constantly I need a man who can stand between the porch and the gap. But there is none and I found none. Now notice where Frederick Douglass said he says this It is easier to build strong boys than is to repair a broken man. This is Psychologists says resource Eola just Peter cos at this fatherless boys spend up to 80 percent of their time with women. They don't know how to act when they grow up this directly affects the relationships between the sexes men become more helpless like big kids and that is so true that's the reason why God goes to the men firsts before he goes to the women where is the flock that I haven't trusted you where are the children that I told you to raise he goes to the men who did it go to the woman or to the men when when they fell in Genesis up a story he went to the man Adam clear as day and you know what Adam did sadly he blamed the woman. You know what men lack responsibility of your faults and accountability too was a while those is next right here a filmmaker in. Jail Waleed this is what she said fatherlessness is the greatest social problem facing society today when you cut off the head of the body falls. That's serious. This is a war of living. And that's a woman. And you know what it is this is how women feel and be honest with you there's nothing painful to a woman. Probably it's 1 of the greatest pains especially if she's in a hole and the Mackinaw exercises leadership she has a lot of burdens she's going through a lot you know growing up you know in my you know when I was I still always not clean my medicine things like that and then 1 day when I get my lighter Christ course convicted me your mom works hard. Won't you wash the dishes before she comes home won't you help her clean want to assist her in those various things you know I did ever since that day when the Spirit spoke to me I have been consistently keeping the house clean making sure my mom doesn't put her finger at anything that is love right there as a son that is an area of love I demonstrate to her. And. You see this vessel is broken. You care a parent the only 1 deck and repair it is Jesus Christ's no counseling session yes but make sure it's being led by Christ. This is this exam we saw in the previous us or it is serious. At time we blame the women we see all this feminist movement the reason why L.G.B. to exist because the father was not there in a life he did not guarded the guarded the heart of his daughter his son. You don't have to have a prestigious position to exercise leadership responsibility. As young as you are where you are right now in life that's where God wants you to exhibit leadership and responsibility do you know why God of all the sons of Jesse he chose the youngest 1 David. Samuel was like this can be the king God says man just from the outward but God judges the heart God saw a man who's going to take responsibility over his people you know the simple lessons of daily duties that we practice from day day to. Is going to help us to be trusted with greater responsibility he that is faithful now which is lease is faithful that which isn't much you see why 40 years tending sheep in the wilderness Moses went through God and trust in him to 10 a massive flock of people for the next 40 years in a wilderness now was a training session for him. And this is what God is doing for us today. And notice this 1 right here like this statement across object lessons page $56.00 and it reads the garden of the heart must be cultivated the soil must be broken up by deep repentance for sin poisonous say tannic plants must be rooted I truly believe that contentment it's is a state of heart it's a mind issue that God is seeing. It's an area of understanding that. When you have realized that you know what. Are the reason why I desire to have this and that etc So I can't control myself because I have a heart problem I have a problem with my imagination I do too much castle building. Castle building my brother this castle building it's fake it's not real it's not reality. Now. Is special testimonies education page $49.00 paragraph. Actually page 49 of 50 you can also see the M.B. like Jesus page 1 of 5 paragraph 5. I want to look at something that's going to make things practical I can go on and on with showing so many statistics and research about this but notice what is right here. That in order for us to clearly understand this area of being single satisfied as many contentment is flourishes as this which I find is very key to know oneself as a great knowledge of self-knowledge leads to humility and to trust in God but it does not take the place of efforts for self improvement you know why because self improvement involves our part. When we realize and see all these deficiencies and defects in our characters and we realize that you know what I need a home of myself and trust God Now is your effort to put into action it goes for the whole who realize their own deficiencies will spare no pains to reach the highest possible standard of physical mental and moral excellence this is the key thing the key ingredient understanding yourself gospel workers page 100 God jealousy the avenues of prayer searching the scriptures and self examination. You have to understand who you are you have to understand your weak points your strong points on the wise if you understand your weak points the enemy is going to get get out you constantly we are counsel to strengthen our weak points and that can be done in Christ's a man now I want us to understand something because Jesus Christ. The Bible said in a fullness of time God sent forth His Son made of a woman made under the law to redeem them that were under the law. I believe Jesus Christ came as a man as a woman because he knows. Now a man. Haves the ability to reconstruct the whole and to bring it influence to impact of members of the family. When you look at the 1st 30 years of Christ's life in the book desire of ages you know what he did he spent time with his father in a carpenter shop the stuff father Joseph but also cater to the to the necessities of Mary in the home life you know I'm sure washing the dishes clean etc Here Christ was learning the areas of what it means to have a home these are the most important lessons to examine inspirations says we always look at the Do we have here ministry but the 3 and a half year ministry was a result of what happened the 1st 30 years of his life. I'm going to read a statement right here notice what it says here. Concerning Christ as Dave Bible Commentary volume 7 page 929. When I started studying righteous by faith and connection to the nature of Christ's I always put Christ in a place where he was really different from me he cannot relate with me but when I saw this I said to myself This is amazing I have victory in him. Christ's says overcoming and obedience is that of a want of a true human being being in our conclusions we make many mistakes because of our own his views of the Human nature of our Lord when we give to his human nature a power that is not possible for man to have in his conflicts with Satan we destroyed the completeness of his humanity. You know what that means when you say that Jesus Christ can relate to me he doesn't know my struggles you know I every time every 5 minutes I think about you know sexual immorality he can't relate to me but I can control myself every time I yell my voice against women I assume that they are because he can't understand me when we say this we destroy his purpose of coming here but also all his human nature did you know the Bible says that Jesus is touch with the feelings of our infirmities and Hebrews you know what that means that means that Jesus knows what a man goes through did you know that temptation he was faced he used the word of God as his defense against the softness trees of Satan right and I know this is not recorded in a scripture but you can see from Scripture how he lived when he said that if any man who saw the last after woman says whoever lusts after a woman in his heart have committed adultery with her I know he lived by everywhere because you know why the scriptures that he was quoting right there in Matisse 528 he saw that men were struggling with it and he was giving us hope that he overcame me I have power to give that to you to possess to overcome Now keep in mind I'm sure it is you got Satan could. Somehow try to allow the Son of God to slip by bringing certain women into the church or in your job would guess what Christ was strong enough to build a defense mechanism he told he this wasn't to say you know he yielded to his father's instructions and when times it was weak you know what he did he went straight to the rule of his father. Literally not my will but I will be done. This is Key He is our example that's why he's called our elder brother that's why I say chapters niver says you know what it says unto us a child is born upon us a son will be a son will be given a government shall be upon his shoulders and then it says and his new shall be called Wonderful Counselor the mighty God and then he says the ever lasting father. He is the father figure the 2nd Adam to the man who did not have that correctly in the whole you can have a father in your home he still doesn't teach you how to be a man you're still fatherless in spirit that can happen at times. Now. I want to share some things that we can possibly do as men. Practically why it is very important for us to understand that knowing yourself taking a time out to see who you are look at your weak points and examine it where you stand as a god you know what I will lack in this area father please help me. I want to share some things now we need to do. The 1st point I want to share. Is that things can change and they will and you have to believe that God has to give you the victory you have to believe that God will make a way of escape the gospel has enough power to give you a victory because the Bible tells me as sin about it grace much more bounded. Knows this number to use time to learn about yourself when we're so distracted we don't have time for ourselves do you know what's the purpose of prayer. It's communion with God But you know what God wants to do God wants to root out all the deficiencies that's in your heart He will surveil the defects that has been concealed from your mind for years that you have not discovered it is preventing us and by the way all the younger brothers here it is a privilege for you to understand who you are now to discover all of this while you have a whole and you're on the verge of literally a divorce is literally tragedy literally I've known men personally you know what they tell me you know we're in a discussion of our relationships and you know I'm you know at that you know I'm single and and you know what they told me enjoy your singleness and I was like enjoy my singleness why. America's misery it's a stress enjoy and when I hear these words you know it's telling me they're not happy they're not happy literally. And they're counseling young men to tell them enjoy or seamless and best guess what that is true but you know what that also says tell me it's telling me that they made mistakes they did not take heed to the leading him pleading of the Holy Spirit tell them I don't think you're ready for this whole relationship but because we're governed by passion and lust it puts us in the position now we have been placed in leadership and a whole in our having arguments and fights with our wives our children out of place you can run the whole and as a result the whole thing is going to collapse you know what Jesus says it's like a man he's building a tower and then the people laugh and that Mark at him look begins to build and he cannot finish you have to plan. Before you witness failure the Man of Tomorrow is forged by his battles to day this is key notices next 1 adult chase and 1 specifically women a lot of guys that are broken by witness depression and we tend to not open up so you know we do we turn to open up our emotions our feelings at times. To the fact you know what I'm going to pause I'm going to go back we tend to not share what we struggle or will we go through and we think that being a man means not expressing who you really are the more you X. the more impressions you have in your mind you feel to express it the further you go to go into depression this is serious. And as a result we can walk around with a nice coat on. Follow it all a suit in church and no one's knows that we're actually secretly at war with ourselves. Knows an excellent and we have no business chasing women if we ourselves are broken. See cannot fill the void in your heart of completeness when God made Adam Adam was not lonely lonely is a state of mind now you're longer facility he was just a lot that's it that was his position I was a state of mind but granted God saw that he needed to help me to further his ministry in the garden I notice this right here for have high standards. If you lower your standards for the sake of peace. You actually compromise your integrity as a man. Desires prestige of the 6 yes and then a says a Christian then it says in the same statement that he was too much of their friends to remain silent. While their life was pursuing a course that will ruin their soul and then it says this a Christianity that is spiritual will be always opposed by the children of disobedience and you know what you know the sentence in the paragraph what is says no man can be true to principle what Alf 1st exciting opposition. If you want to stand true to principle you will always be faced by opposition. There is no 1 has been faced in the face of adversity than Jesus Christ himself. And I'm be honest that you're I remember times in my life in my Christian experience literally. My friends used to laugh at me because I think partake of the activities that they wanted to do in my heart I felt so bad but now when I go to the Word of God. The Word of God gives me comfort and tells me that I have my value and I have my worth I don't have to lower my standards just to bring peace you don't have to lower your standards in order to be with someone notice what it says right here focus on what you have and not what you don't have Let's go to 2nd critique stop as a. The book of 2nd Corinthians chapter use 8. Second British up today I want to quote the scripture. Notice what is as right over here. Reading from verses 12 1st 2nd Corinthians chapter is a verse to all the Bible says this if there be 1st a willing mind. It is acceptable according to that a man to have and not according to that he have nots. God is going to work with you where you are. God is going to use you. You don't need all the accolades in ministry you don't need all the the healthy disposition that someone has that you desire to have you say you know what let me try to fix myself and then I saw So you know it's not going where God wants to work with you where you are this is the reason why we come to Jesus we have to come as we are that's not in a state of closing that is a state of heart bring your heart to Christ let him fix it. Now they've got to you have to acknowledge your saw friends in the context of focus on what you have and not what you don't keep busy with the things that makes you happy number 6 What makes you happy for me I love going to work out I love going to nature of studying the Bible I like hanging out all my friends I like to do research that's my thing I'm a history buff I try to keep myself busy at times I like to go if opportunity permits you know. Go out with the guys and shoot some hoops etc You know I'm a big basketball fan but just get some exercise and bluff only keep yourself busy in the things that makes you happy because you know what's going to happen if you're constantly not keeping yourself busy what's going to happen that I don't miss creeps in 1 of the sons of Saddam it was I don't miss I don't miss kicked in Notice what us as number 7 work on making yourself the kind of person you would want to date or I would say Court. And guess what OK I'll explain to you. A lot of men that I know and guess what there's nothing wrong desire in the marriage life a man I think is beautiful I think is glorious America couple has a powerful effect and given the gospel in a single person you know it's awful but then again you know pauses when you're single you can do more for the Lord however. As a man if you want to if you desire to be with a Christian young woman especially 1 who believes in the 3rd angels message and practice with principle you have to live the thought in his message in practice and principle keep in mind you cannot lower your standard just for the sake of happiness. And I've done many of my mistakes and I've seen it and it's not a pretty picture literally now there's a mix as my brother. OK OK Yeah basically you want to be able to be the person in other words it's not like exactly who you wore but it's also in principle yes in the character of Christ same standards etc Yeah like that you don't want to you know dating yourself you know I know opposites are trucks but I'll be boring if I hadn't dated myself. Yes. There. Used. To. Love me you know. You can't expect a moment and you some sense of security acceptance if you're not willing to be secure in yourself as well so you can only give the women what you have in other lands how we does ask for it on as far as an ability education but we don't have it ourself 1st to have it 1st and then expect to receive it because you have 1st to give. Exactly exactly thank you. Now notice what it says here learn to love your old company you know what that is all boy. Now I'll tell you this much men are good at being alone a lot women are good at going you know girls not out. You know was great for man to help enhance his image go to family reunions we don't like going there every time we go to a family reunion. People are saying you know where's the soul and soul grandma you know something is going to be burnt in the oven women congregate a lot as men if we congregate you know that's what Jesus did a lot you know he had a love for souls he liked mingle he was a friend of sinners if you can do that that's going to help your disposition as a man. This is in yourself from everybody else let me go watch the game that's not going to work that's not healthy. You want to put yourself out there that's going to help you from provide is going to prevent you from having thoughts about yourself negativity remember that we learned today hate in pride that is a serious issue of what the mass of it gave this morning's message notice number 9. Always remember this if you really truly believe that God you know is calling you to an area in life that you desire to have a woman for example if you're in ministry or. You know you also want to are going to see this I don't try to think of something but if you desire to be with someone always remember that there are still good people out there when I mean by this is that sometimes we have because we have went through a lot of pain in the past I know a brother seriously I know of a brother because he went through a bad breakup to rebound that he gets in relationships with other women and then he breaks them too so they can feel how he feels that's what people normally do that's how Satan operates break more people so they can feel my pain because I don't want to be the 1 you want to be broken I want to be less broken by others ha notice what presidents Calvin Coolidge says a 30th. President United States he said the statement. No person was ever on earth for what he received on or has been the reward for what he gave. Jesus Christ's gave his life so they you and I can have a healthy disposition. To be able to live up to the standard that he called us to do the role that he called us to play what he called Moses he trusted Moses he believed in Moses Well Moses didn't believe in himself but God saw a value in you that's what he's saying and Christ gave his life because he saw value in each and every 1 of those we are precious in His sight Moses next 1 right over here in fact I want to read few statements but there is a remarkable book that I would encourage you guys to get it's called Smart love a field guide for single adults by Nancy Van Pelt. And I want to read 1 section. A section that I believe that has been a deterioration for men because keep in mind that at times we tend to compare ourselves with other men because they have a better job than us they speak well excell for and we assume that that puts us in a disadvantage you know and I want to encourage you encourage you wherever you are God can help you does that make sense God can restore his moral image in you in Christ Jesus notice what it says right this is a section entitled There's a chapter called the prerequisites of love and it speaks about comparison is very is this business is that people go through and also just as a scum person. People who feel they are inferior people who feel inferior are always comparing themselves to others and coming up short John was attracted to Becky. Who invited him to go to a party with her jog went but had a miserable time as he felt that other men there had a better jobs or better looking or were better dressed than he even though John desperately wanted to see Becky again he never called her because he felt so inferior. Becky became engaged to 1 of John's best friends. At the dinner 1 evening when discussing old times listen carefully Becky told John how much she had wanted to see him again after that party John last said to another guy because he compared himself. To the competition and accepted the feat. Every time you compare yourself to someone else you will come out 2nd best when you feel 2nd best so you ought act 2nd that it's you know what that means. You are living a life comparing yourselves with people you will never reach the goal the prize the mark that you desire to achieve success belongs to people who believe. That they have the potential to strive for it did you know that when you compare yourself you compare him to that person's standard that's how they live. When you compare yourself to crisis the sky's the limit. Notice what it says right over here the man with the healthy self image and a strong sense of his worth and masculinity is far happier and more competent in coping with life then the male pledged by doubts and feelings of adequacy Yes Do you believe that. You know what happens. Dissociated all rates are higher among men than a woman. Depression if you literally on Heaven's record is really higher on men and women because heaven records the hearts the motives when we hold for all these things because. We have not come in the area of having a good relation with our fathers we allow social media to dictate who we should be with how we should live it is deteriorating the calling of God in your life. I know men they pursue careers in order to strive for the intention that they desire but the last time I check the the man who had more influence than any other human figure in the history of the world Jesus Christ's he literally was a dusty traveler sleeping from hope for home at 12 disciples following him and he had an influence that changed the entire world. Is not where you have been is now what you possess it's who you are in Christ Jesus and God is trying to rebuild that image and they're now. I want to read his last statement is 1 of the most powerful statements in inspiration I believe this is me I believe when it comes to crisis. And what I'm about to read I truly believe that every man if he's in crisis he can come to this position because I believe in perfection of character I believe in victory office and when this character is demonstrated what about sorry. You are going to build a healthy environment not only for your siblings for your parents but also a home that you desire to have on your all is as this this is this day we've got pastes in 263 Christs never murmured never utter discontent displeasure or resentment he was never disheartened discourage ruffled or fright it he was patient calm and self-possessed under the most exciting and trying circumstances all his works were performed with a quiet dignity and ease whatever commotion was around him applause did not elate him he thir not the threats of his enemy and as boldness courage he moved amid the world of excitement of violence and crime as the sun moves above the clouds human passions and commotions and trials were beneath him he sailed like the sun above them all yet he was not indifferent to the walls of men. He can sympathize with us he knows what we're going through his heart was ever touched with the sufferings a necessity of his brother and as though he himself was 1 afflicted he had a cause any were joy of peace which was serene he was ever swallowed up in the will of his father not ma I will but Vine be done was heard from his pale and quivering lips and inspirations says we long and pray that the grace of God may come into your hearts we want you to make a tire surrender to God May God help you all to walk calmly and carefully as our prayer is that your pretty brothers is that you praise to be just like Jesus. You know Christ's wherever he walked he was the frank roles that literally pervaded the atmosphere and it really brought it influence other people when you're an inspiration when people saw him they were not attracted to his of parents more he spoke the words of eternal life they lost so I have as a parents and was drawn to his heart because he minister to the void I was receiving ages they were longing for something to fill that Hearts now with through abuse that went through molestation not having someone to teach you how to be a man. He understands what we go through and by God's amazing grace I pray that 1 of the greatest lessons that I can leave here with us is that take time to understand who we are. Enjoy while it lasts and make the effort to be able to study the life of the humble savior because when you study his life. Little Boy you know by beholding you'll become change and by God's amazing grace when the Lord cause you to marriage you'll be able to be healthy to govern not only her but also the flock the whole in trust you're a man a man let us pray shall we. My father have a lot I would like to say thank you again Lord are there so much things that we could have covered it's very exhaustive. But Lord we also want to understand that if we fail to appreciate the area of being single and also understanding the satisfaction that is in you. We will make mistakes and former Gretz and we don't want to be their statistics we pray Lord that only says to 6 that we want to live after and live up to Lord is that Sister sticks of a son who have been crowned with glory because of the life of Victor he lived in Christ's. We pray Father you me and handsome us help us to model our lives after that man Jesus Christ. We love him and we sing in Jesus name and. 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