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The Changing Definition of Misogyny and the Making of a Man

Ron Kelly

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Ron Kelly

Senior Pastor, Village SDA Church, Berrien Springs, Michigan

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  • June 8, 2019
    12:00 PM
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Lord we are a mission minded people we want your love the flow through us transforming us as it transforms the world now Lord we are opening our hearts to you to your spirit to your presence in the word and were praying that we would worship you through. A life of obedience willing freely given devotion now bless us Lord as we tackle a tough topic in Jesus' name amen when Title my message this morning the changing definition of massaging me in the making of man and I'm here to tell you my wife does not like my sermon title. What's the word like massaging even mean sounds bad no it is better comes from 2 Greek words meaning the hate and woman so massage iness woman hater. And you hear the word used a lot these days as a matter of fact you're hearing the word more and more which is what I want to talk to you about when I was praying over what I should talk about I realize I'm never here on Father's Day I'm always that can't meeting and that means that I don't naturally circle around the topic of manhood and fatherhood and so this year I felt impressed to take a few moments and talk about this because in my opinion the vacancy of the Father in the lives of the rest of the family especially the children is a detriment that cannot be easily made up for all you single ladies that are trying hard to be both mom and dad to your kids praise the Lord keep up don't give up continue mix them in with the extended family in the church family and May the Lord strengthen you and help you as you attempt to be both in the absence of the dead but in 2012 Joe you Gil are the prime minister of Australia went on kind of a Depending on how you view it some would call it a rant some would call it an impassioned speech in the midst of her speech she looked across the aisle at her opposite in the form of political opposition who had been critiquing one of her one of her members of her cabinet. They both had made inappropriate comments which we would call sexist or massage in a stick whether they were massaging a stick or sexist depends on your definition but for a period of several minutes on a video that went viral on the internet she pulled together several terms and after that the Australian dictionary changed its definition of Misato Ginnie and it started to include the words sexism or sexist Now if you're a sexist you can have a strong prejudice against women or you could be lumped in in the category of those who hold patriarchal views now I want to remind you that as most conservative Christians who still believe in the inspiration of scripture it's very easy to lump evangelicals and other conservative Christians into the category of patriarchal which is barely separated and not at all in the minds of some from the word sexist now it's sexist and massage it's me the same thing pretty soon you've taken those who believe in traditional roles and you've turned them into woman haters and society has just kind of gently broadened their embrace of all those that stand in the way of the new genderless roles now when I came up with my sermon title I was quite surprised to google my subject matter and find all this information out I had been thinking to myself you know the word massage and he is being used to encapsulate a lot more than it probably really means I mean something along these lines and lo and behold when I go and start researching hit one of the 1st things that pops up is a Wall Street Journal article from 2012 on this very topic the changing definition of the we're now it matters. Because you might respectfully disagree with the genderless agenda of modern feminism and secularism you might actually believe that a father and a mother have complimentary but different roles you might actually believe that a woman ought to be paid the same amount as a man if she's doing the same job these are things that should be but you still might actually believe that God designed the people though both recep representing his person and his image to project different components of that image into the home the school the workplace and society it's exceptionally important for you to understand that what makes up this genderless agenda of the far left is an attempt to achieve something that they believe will open up the doors of creativity and a superior light so away with traditional values and away with traditional roles they're all inhibitors to a greater self actualization but I'm here to tell you this morning we are not many years away from a reaction to the secular experiment that is creating more fractured homes more broken homes more broken people than at any time in American history and it won't be too many decades from now if that long before the world will cry out that we need to get back to the things that created some semblance of normalcy in our society yes indeed the word massage any woman hater is enlarging itself to anyone that would stand in the way of an agenda. That distinguishes between male and female and these things are rolling forward they are not something that is static they're dynamic now I was informed by my good work associate pastor Joe that he had been watching a series by Ken Burns called American lives and there are 2 in that chapter that I watched on the woman suffragette movement and they were most interesting what these women had to go through to get the right to vote an amazing journey some true courage but along the way the movement was if you would like to say connected to some might say hijacked by elements and issues underneath that would propel it on farther down the way and even in its infancy to represent things that were beyond the abuses that were in society so as I was dialogue with Pastor Joel made a very excellent observation he said that Ellen White was very careful about which movement she connected herself to and I found it very interesting the woman voting rights movement connected itself to the Women's Christian Temperance organization of which we find Ellen White being a strong supporter. But after thinking about what. Pastor Joe said I decided just to research it a little bit and sure enough what I discovered in the ad ministry view is the N.Y. never attached herself to the woman suffrage movement and I found out part of the reason why. So reading out of an article written by General clean bill surprisingly Ellen White did not endorse or use her influence to promote the woman suffrage movement as far as women suffrage when she personally support of the treatment of women as equals but she saw no reason to spend time money and personal effort in a cause that would not directly build God's Kingdom the smore name I'm here to tell you that I believe his summary is good as far as it goes but now watching. We are seeing that it's not just that it would not build God's Kingdom we can see and will see that many of the elements of the movement stand and direct contradiction to God's movement God's pre-established Kingdom God's plan for the family and God's plan for order in the whole this morning I'd like to take your bullets and I want to read the reflecting Christ statement in there for as much as divided the admin to church on issues of gender as of late one thing stands unequivocally clear that when it comes to the home Ellen White never deviated for a moment from what we would call the Judaic Christian or some might negatively call the patriarchal understanding depending on how you define patriarchy some people would not dare define patriarchy in the ways that it used disparagingly as a dominating dictating aggressive thing I have no interest in that I don't believe the Bible teaches that I don't believe Ellen White teaches it but let there be clarity in regards to the whole she is. She repeats herself over and over again about the basic structure the basic roles the beauty of the harmony between husband and wife but what's here in this bulletin is not a remotely grab little piece of data that flows in the opposite direction of her general tenor of statements this is where it's at and this morning I'm here to tell you we have a crisis I heard once anecdotally of a of a greeting card company that offered greeting cards to all the prisoners on Mother's Day and there was a real rush on the free offer the prisoners all wanted their cards. But when it came Father's Day and the same offer was made very few men wanted or maybe I should say they needed a card because there are prison cells full of people who have either abandoned or were never taught how to grow up to be men there are vacancies in homes where loving men ought to be holding down a beautiful statement and regular ordinary witness of the glory of God when the kindness of God's heart and the service of God's heart along with the proper structure and direction of God's heart is brought in to a little part of society the home had been his home page to 11 to 12 the home is an institution of God. So if you throw out the Bible if you believe that it itself is the original patriarchal document it itself is what is in the way of societal advance. We've already got a problem the whole is an institution of God if this is true maybe the keys to a societal regeneration are to be found here indeed they are. God designed that the God designed that the family circle father mother and children should exist in this world as a firm all members of the family center in the To You seem a little weakly or friends to heaven in front of you all members of the family center in the new the father. So what happens when the father is gone how about what happens when the father is vacant How about what happens when the father's preoccupied How about what happens when the father makes the profession of Christianity but does not have spiritual emotional intimacy with God if this family is centering in the father's leadership and there is no father present mind body and soul what can we expect in a society where the evil flow is a rampant ravaging river waiting to sweep away the ones we love if ever there was a day when we need dads if ever there was a day when we need to teach manhood if ever there was a day when we need to nurture the masculine it's Today our society finds itself awash in the agendas and the activism of feminism and man has been at the whipping boy in and of society's displeasure for about 6 decades now we're a long ways from Mayberry we're a long ways from Leave It to Beaver and my 3 sons we're a so far away that we can find a home after home where the dad has been a Playboy instead of a man and everybody suffering because of it if ever there was a day that we need to reeducate ourselves and what it means to be a man it is today if we are century in the form of leadership in the whole of the Father it superbly important the father is like God. He is the law maker illustrating in his own manly bearing the sterner virtues energy integrity honesty patience courage diligence and practical usefulness the father is in one sense the priest of the household lain upon the altar of God the morning and the evening sacrifice so what's it take to make a man well I've been doing a little bit of looking into this and I want to tell you it's been quite an interesting journey it starts very very young no I'm not going back to the chromosome no beginning but I would like to read a little bit this 1st quote is from Robert Stoller psychologist infant boys and girls are emotionally attached to the mother in psychodynamic language the mother is the 1st love object she meets all their child's primary needs girls can continue to develop on their feminine identification through the relationship with their mothers on the other hand a boy has an additional developmental task to dis identify from the mother and identify with the father the 1st order of business. And being a man according to this analyst is for the boy not to be a woman. You've probably never thought so much about this there is a component of boyhood that is perfectly fine with mom but somewhere along the way the identity connection to masculinity has to take place and it's the father's role to be active in that not as Mr intimidating macho but as a man in his own making he may not be the lumberjack or the builder or the cement worker or the oiled well done. Drill or he may be instead a creative more tender person but that masculinity no matter how it is exhibited has to be meted up with a nurturing man to where the boy is not wounded in the early years connecting with masculinity this identity connection must exist such a boy will then for reasons about temperament and family dynamics He's speaking now this is Nicholas this is Joseph Smith Nicolo see that these boys who are wounded for reasons about temperament and family dynamics will retreat from the challenge of identifying with masculinity so instead of incorporating the masculine when they have a wound from the masculine side there is something that begins to develop that creates what is called a pre homo sexual tendency they are rejecting the emerging male nurse and actually developing a defensive posture against it and here's the deal. A boy who has a wound with masculine identity and connects with the feminine side in puberty in adolescence when romantic love and sexuality come about Will eroticize it. And thus you're on the road to homosexuality and by the way some studies say there's twice as many male homosexuals as female Some say 5 times as many Some say as much as 11 times as many the reason is that a woman never has to dis identify with the mother but a boy has to properly disidentify with the female to connect with the male and the interesting thing is is that along the way this wound on the masculine side is not something that's jettisoned in an age gender or non gender experience it's something that's long for which is why when it comes to personal ads for homosexual men they're often look looking for other men who are straight and they're not bisexual most homosexuals have an amendment homosexuals are completely attracted to men a salient father will interrupt his the mother son symbiosis or this connection that they have because he is stinkingly senses that it's unhealthy if the father wants his son to grow up straight he has to break the mother son Bawn it's a proper bond to infancy but not in the boy's best interest afterwards in this way The Father has to be a model demonstrating that it's possible for a Sunday maintain a loving relationship with this woman his mom while still maintaining his own independence in this sense the father should function as a healthy buffer between the Father and the Son You see it's very important mom's when the father says we're going to go do this that you don't say it's too cold or that's too hard to hear me it's a Dad job to create this kind of confidence in strength in the young man and to have those moments for bonding. Hello Nicolo C goes on to say for too many and for too long professionals have maintained a patronising disregard for parents who expressed concern about their children's sexual orientation these professionals would rather ignore the child symptoms it seems and focus on the parents problems with unenlightened homophobia or hetero heterosexual ism these components these clinicians when they take this approach are replacing genuine helpfulness with the social agenda the conflicts with the values in the concerns of most families this is because Nicholas he says with one undeniable fact remains most parents do not want their children to grow up as homosexuals. It is a lifestyle choice that comes out of a gender identity distortion it is a tendency while not genetically directed it is what we've discovered in time for all that's been written is there is never been found a genetic cause to homosexuality we can see predisposition like we do for alcohol or food or anything else you can find it for this but with all of those things there is still the potential for environment and proper body and proper gender identity to develop their all God's children this is not a homophobic rant here I'm talking with you about the development of gender identity which by the way has gone long farther down the road than when the subject matter and reading reading to you here was written this most of this was written about 15 years ago. But I've researched it out and they've still not found a genetic link to homosexuality. Today in our society it's not quite so easy to help a young man solidify their male identity young boys are not generally expected to go through initiation rites instead with today's confused approach to gender issues the teacher may tell them to embrace their feminine side or their androgynous nature or worse their school council main courage them to identify themselves as gay students of all grade levels may be encouraged by public school educators try on various sexual identities some school gave more mean programs even encourage them to experiment in fact some psychologists now believe. That limiting ourselves to heterosexuality places an unnecessary construction on human potential and when we overcome our fears of bisexuality it will be said that we will discover creative new possibilities friends. We are living in an age of tremendous confusion and the confusion is playing itself out however well most young boys and even more young girls will not have a generally identity distortion moment it is important for us to recognize that the roles given by God are woven into the very biology of who we are and even now as a war is on about whether gender is biologic or self determined we find ourselves as Christian needing to be on embarrassed and unashamed believing that with God instituted is the family with complimentary and cooperative roles but we have with different distinctions in role is a good thing and in the 30 years of pasturing I can assure you just like the psychologists have written. There is something to be found in the form of a genuine happy God ordained a traditional construct to the home you see friends what God ordained he or Dave for joy and pleasure and beauty now. I don't have time to go everything I have I'm holding in my hand some very interesting documentation from the University of South Carolina scholar comments about Victoria Woodhill the 1st feminist presidential candidate folks I know why and white did not embrace the feminist movement because it was associated with free love and spiritual ism as well as women's rights and she understood that those things aren't static and that eventually when the box was opened and the genie was out of the bottle that it was going to move us so far away from the god ideal and the happiness of the home that she could never for a moment lend one little iota of support even though the women's kit temperance organization Christian temperature organization joined ranks with them now let's go to the Scriptures take your Bibles and open up to the Book of Genesis Genesis chapter one. This is the story of the beginning. God you 6 days let's go to chapter 2. He says in verse 7 Then the Lord God for man of the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life and he became a living being we understand that God made male and female in his image my focus this morning is not to diminish female in one small bit but my focus unequivocally is this is that the great vacancy in all of society except in one place. You find a great vacancy of male leadership in society except in one place and that one place is the business world and the feminists would say There you go that's the proof. But there's something about the business world that exempts itself from all the commentary because you see the man who owns the business hopefully a good man but whether good or bad the man who owns the business calls the shots. And he's beyond the reach of societal incrimination largely speaking and I'm not looking for a moment to create an excuse for the immoral inconsiderate unloving Konkan it confident over the top common and cocky unchristian behavior of any man but I'm here to tell you it's time for the whole the church the school and the public place to take back the proper balance and place of a man who understands compassion conviction courage and kindness it's time for the Christian man to come out from behind the veil of the things he's either ballin down to in private or afraid of it's time for an intimacy with God that creates a real sense of God like confidence for proper leadership and proper servant hood in all of these places I want to go to chapter 3 and Chapter 3 we come to the fall verse 6 when the woman saw that the tree was good for food and that it was a delight to the eyes and that the tree was desirable to make one wise she took from the fruit and she ate it and she also gave it to her husband and he a I want to establish in the book of Genesis This is the only book we're going to open this morning all reference to a few others but in this book God holds Adam disproportionally responsible for certain things that happen. Abraham would be the same way Eve was big guy while Adam took the fruit out of her hands without any trickery or any deceit and he said Eve You're more important to me than God and he ate the fruit by the way friends if there is a ploy that the devil is still working to destroy the hall it's when the man or the woman puts one of the other before God and. If you want to be in a respectful beautiful loving relationship you trust that relationship to God's hands and as it says in 1st Peter chapter 3 women be like Sarah don't be afraid you need to know what is the right thing to do a man without a proper accountability of accountability is a dangerous person. And the most powerful person in a married man's life should be his wife but she can abdicate that role out of fear and once she does I'd like to know who the man has to confront his secrets to confront. His potential hypocritical hidden since while he walks about life looking upright and good his soul is Roddy who often knows that it's the wife but if she herself is not confident in Christ as I spoke in the sermon last week if she cannot precipitate a crisis if she cannot create a moment of accountability I pity the poor man because a man is certainly he certainly has feet of clay and he needs somebody that can both love him and encourage him to faithfulness and hold him accountable at the same time Eve is not the reason the race went into the went down the tubes Adam is the one who took the race down the tubes Adam is the one held responsible Adam is the one who sin we must be recovered from Adam is the one who held the reins of choice and the locus of control Adam is the one who decided that I'm not going with God I'm going with her and by the way if they had stayed together none of us would have been and would be in this situation it's a posture of togetherness with complimentary but different roles Adam is held responsible I want to transition now to the story of Abraham of who spiritual lineage we are turn over to chapter 12 Genesis Chapter 12 Abraham becomes the next key man in the journey of faith especially after the flood we can learn a lot about manhood from Abraham. Abraham is a self assured person it's not that he's so sure of himself it's the fact that he is in an emotionally intimate relationship with the Father and His confidence is not in his own manhood his confidence is in his identity in relationship to God The 1st thing a man has to do or a boy to become a man is he has to learn whose image he is making as to learn of the one whose image he is made in when you don't take the time to get to know the God whose image you were made in how can you be what he's called you to be how can you have the courage to stand up to the forces of evil arrayed against you principalities and powers in high places if there is one gross evil if there is one great abomination of neglect it is this that men rush out into their day either pursuing something or running from something and they don't stop to let God be God Thus they are victimized by the adversary and they are bound by their own desires and what today to be bound by your own desires Money Sex Power. Lusting greed of all types and their all can kinds of men there are dead men walking in our midst because they look like they're walking with God but in their private lives they're bowing down to their own evil propensities friends you don't have the power to break that on your own but Glory Hallelujah Jesus can break the shackles of self chosen sin and addiction. There is not a man here today who could not be a self respecting kind large hearted loving generous courageous person if they knelt at the feet of Jesus saying say God whatever you want me to do I'm going to do that's what Abraham did in chapter 12 God says it's time to leave me and I'm here to tell you for some of you it's time to leave it's time for you to leave some of your buddies behind it's time for you to leave some of the allegiances you've made it's time for you to go on to higher spiritual ground and know God and godly men so that you can be a man that your own kids look up to and that the rest of society never have to find out there was some huge gaping hidden spiritual cancer growing on him every single man listening to me here today can be a man who respects himself because he has bowed low before the King of Kings and Eve Can the stand erect and fearless before the monarchs this is the call of Abraham God says I want you to leave some things behind you might need to smash your television. Like they did in that film you know produce there in the south at a Baptist church there might be a sacred T.V. smashing moment or remote smashing moment or we might need to do like that woman and one of the meetings I was in here recently my senior in age but she said in front of a number of other people I have gotten rid of internet in my home glory hallelujah turn off the sceptic that's flowing into your kids and your lives heart and mind and live in cleanliness see. I got internet my home once. Turned all my kids into continual shoppers. And I would imagine that it wanted to do a whole lot more than that and it wasn't too long way until I got it out of my home because as Ellen White says my children grow up like calves in the stall What does she mean by that well cared for without cares innocent happy I lived in 10 acres of woods there was no reason for my kids to be sitting around looking at the screen when they could be outside building things and exploring and experiencing the God of Creation sitting in a field and listening to a bird it's time for some things to go Abraham was called to get up and get out of earth he left there was a reason those cities were becoming increasingly evil but you know today you don't have to live in the city the city found its way into our hearts and minds and there are things in our life that need to be ejected there will be no other way to be free and by the way when it comes to moral purity for a man the Bible doesn't say stand around and fight it says in the New Testament you fleece sexual immorality you don't stand around to see if you're man enough to overcome it you say I'm outta here and that means your wife can look at every device you have that means you never clear the history off your computer because you don't need to that means that every. That means there are no secret chapters none of you want to be a man who strong you go away from the places where the Saints got you ballin down and you admit. You don't deny you admit and it will be an awkward admittance when you have to say to the person you love the most I really hate to tell you this about myself because one thing a man wants is to be respected and sometimes the things he has to say he knows are sealing a death warrant on some measure of respectability but you know what honesty is the journey to recovery it starts with you it gives courage to the one you're talking to even though it wounds them to hear what you have to say but that honesty is the journey to discovery because in effect you're saying I will be accountable so you're going to know and from now on if you want to ask ask. Go the Lord said and he went through. Let's go a little bit farther in the story turn over to Chapter 13 you want to become a man and you can't be greedy lot was a individual who understood very early on his financial security as well as this business of purity was a gift of God And so when he takes his nephew to be like a son and his nephew is blessed under the shadow of his spiritual tree and they have too many animals for everyone to be watering in the same place and feeding in the same field Abraham as a true father as a true man understands that he should do what is noble and right now law should have done what is noble and right to and he should have said No uncle you pick a lot in the midst of a man of integrity and generosity didn't get it. He looks down at the plane which was like Sodom and Gomorrah he says that's where I want to be and he goes down there not only did Sodom and Gomorrah look like the Garden of Eden but he had gone so far from the holy behavior that was in the balance of the Garden of Eden that lot's own family was carried away by the arrogance the hubris the lives of ease and pleasure. But if that's what Lott wants Abraham's going to give it to him there are some of you listening me here today who have learned how to pinch every penny until it bleeds and sometimes it bleeds it bleeds shame on the cause of Christ. You're overreaching You act like you've got to be your own financial security for the future God's men learn to be generous they work hard and they give freely it doesn't mean that they let everything flow through their hands but it does mean that they don't let the idea that their identity is tied up in how big a house they own or how fancy a car or whatever act of accumulating they can do their identity is not their stuff. A Godly man understands what John the Baptist said to His disciples when they said everybody's following Jesus and John the Baptist said a man can only have what God gives him and while thrift and hard work and frugality are important God's people God's men aren't tied to the superficial ality of their stuff or the size of their bank account there are people out there that are chasing money like they're chased like there was no clean water left on the earth and they had to get every last little drop for themselves go ahead like Wesley said and make all you can but do it so you can give all you can. If there is a generous person on the face of the planet in Abraham's day it's him and after he goes and rescue his nephew from the kings of the plane he won't even take he says I don't even want to string off the sandals from his booty because I don't want you saying you made me rich rich is not the goal of a godly man caricature discipleship nurture witness faithfulness these are the directions of a godly man but Abraham makes a few mistakes along the way. He is the man of faith God takes him out one night shows in the stars and while Abraham has no children and he's not a young man when God says look at the look at the star studded black velvet above you your children will be more than this Abraham says he has I believe you'll do that he goes for 10 more years without a child and then he gets a suggestion now I'm here to tell you as my work associates I've told them that there is one person in the world they should ever listen to one it's not me I've told the the individuals I'm working the closes with if there's one person in the world you should ever listen to that your wife know immense. When you've got a Christian wife and she bows low before the King of Kings so she can stand up to you if she needs to you've got the person who loves you the best and knows you the most and she's the safe this one for you to recreate course on to maintain a little bit of dignity maybe a lot. Now if you're married to a godless woman you still out a do a little listening because even a godless woman isn't going to get it wrong all the time. But when you're married to a godly woman she ought to be the 1st place you go for advice. Because I'm here to tell you Abigail save David from our random mistake and how many other unwritten stories are there of wise men who understood they didn't have a monopoly on wisdom. And by the way I practice what I preach you tell me I preach a good sermon so what my wife tells me I preached a bad one I'm going to go back and look at what I did wrong. 10 years without a baby so Sarah who's not perfect either gets herself in the record books a little bit like Eve with a bad suggestion take a go now personally I think that Hagar the name Hagar is not the most beautiful phonetically sounding name in the world but I suspect she was one of the prettiest women you had ever seen because she probably was given by one of the Egyptians in his forays down to the south and while the name Hagar may not rest beautifully on the ears of most westerners My guess is that Hagar rested beautifully on the eyes of Abraham and it was a bad suggestion which it wasn't too terribly hard to take but when it was all said and done God and Sarah held Abraham responsible for a bad decision and later on some 13 years later when the boy is big enough to make fun of Isaac and Sarah says he's got to go and his mom goes with Him God said to Abraham she's right you do it. When you when either of the spouses lose that emotional can spiritual connection with God nobody has the courage to say I'm sorry nobody has the courage to say that's wrong. Nobody has the courage to suffer because suffering hurts and wouldn't we all rather be in one big denial journey together Nami US denies at times you suffer why because you love and you made a commitment and that's what it takes to make it to the other side. Yes God holds Abraham responsible it is his fall we learn as we make it through the journey that Abraham is a mediator he knows how to pray God makes a covenant with him and then God tells him what he's going to do and Abraham says you wouldn't wipe out this city for 50 people would you and confiscate course. You could we keep talking about this because Abraham's really processing he's learning about God. Is that the as more compassion for the 5 cities of the plain than God does let me ask you if you would wipe out that city for 40 people which you could says never. And when this whole thing is all undone not only will God not wipe out anybody for whom there is hope but he will send angelic beings down there to take by the hand and almost drag him out of the city so that they could clean to a little lifeline of hope and still be a part of the promises made Abraham amazing you're too busy to get to know God you're too busy to get to know yourself. You're too busy to get to know your spouse you're too busy to get to know your kids because you need to know them in Christ they have journeys they need to make and they need to sense that you are not only strong as a man but you're safe self-control. I can understand why some of these feminist movements found so much for women beaten and taken advantage of and denied opportunity. But none of this could ever be attributed to the kind of patriarchy that the Bible describes because God's plan although the man is in the home is the center God's plan is for the man to love his wife as he loves himself and there's plenty of men out there who aren't living like that. So friends let this message this morning be a call to examine yourself men and see if you be in the faith because it's easy to walk around and say especially in this community because so much cultural Adventism in this community. That people are being captured. Destroyed and in slaved by an absence of the legitimate legitimate identity in Christ finally. At the end of his life or towards the end of Genesis Chapter $22.00 Abraham has the teth he's failed other times he's lied you've lied Well I hate to say it and I'm glad to say it takes years unfortunately a number of the patriarchs had a problem telling the truth too don't be overly discouraged your fear can drive you to act just like them and if it has follow them to the cross follow them to Jesus be honest and start over what's it take to make a man somebody who can deny himself who can say No Yesterday I was on the internet searching I was at the MIT website now mind you I really don't think MIT has a vested interest in corrupting me but as I scrolled down through all of their articles the 1st of which I had read I came across pornography on a graphic imagery it wasn't video it was just multiple pictures of the same inappropriate still scrolled on. Or turn it off. But don't linger in front of the image it's like that said doctress woman looking to draw you in. What is the end of Abraham look like. He's not done being a dead he knows that for his son to be a good man. He needs a godly wife and so he calls alleys are in. And he says put your hand on my thigh in other words alleys or come get close and I want to tell you if I was Ellie's or and I had to go up my hand and Abraham's thigh I'd be looking right in his face don't take a wife for my son from amongst the people of this land you promise me that you'll go back to my household and you'll find someone who believes in God and you'll find a wife you'll look for a wife there what if I can't find one then you'll be released from this Val but whatever you do don't take my boy back there you listen 7th Day Adventists I'm is slowly sliding backwards when it should be going to higher ground and you know why a failure of leadership we need more all respectable kind courageous convicted men who will commit themselves not only to their self-interest including their family but to the larger family in which there is often an absence of men and to society. I'm going to tell you one thing before I'm done it's not easy to be a man but it is despicable to not be able to respect yourself God made you men with the ability to exercise them emotional independence and say when everybody else is falling apart around you this is the right thing we're going to do it. I talked to one of the fathers not long ago who said sometimes he makes a decision with his wife and the kids grumble but they do it anyway give me such courage give me some more men who know what the right thing is to do and I'll hang on until the feelings change give me some more men who teach their boys to grow into manhood who some day will say Dad I want to be just like you they may not say it when you're confronting them in their life of self-indulgence which the society affirms but you don't and you can't and you won't use to things that should shape your manhood one is duty and one is destiny you figure out what the Destiny is the duty of start lining itself up very clear. The ultimate man Jesus Christ. Who being in the very form God didn't consider it robbery to call themselves God because he was. He knew who he was that's why he could put the towel on his waist when none of the other disciples would do it that's why he could go and stoop down low in a system of caste where he's at the bottom. But I want you to know when Peter says you won't wash my feet Jesus didn't back off and say That's OK said no way if I don't wash your feet you're not with me and when Peter was offended not too many hours later when. He was told by Jesus that he would be denying that he even knew Jesus. Jesus didn't back up and say OK you're right I'm wrong the effective leader in this case the effective male leader. Was made a little bit different than a woman and was made to embody enough emotional independence to say because this is right this is what we will do it is the book education page 57 says stand for the right go the heavens fall off ladies you do have something to do in all of this. It's as if our scripture reading couldn't help but say at least more than once so it says To times remember this. And if you're in doubt go back to 1st Samuel 25 and read it again or 15 times Abigail says to a a madman named David wounded an insecure you don't really want to act like this do you. Feel spy if you didn't get in on the 1st reading the 2nd reading makes it very clear respect your husband now you can't respect everything he does course he can't respect everything anybody does even you. But the general tenor of your relational posture. Cannot be to deny him what God gave him which is proper leadership in the home if you do this. You are shooting him and yourself in the foot but while you're doing it you stand strong in a wreck for Jesus for what's right too because sometimes he may lose his way. I want to say my mother did a fantastic job of this and I want to thank my father for giving me the time and being a safe person for my male ness as a little boy to connect with his male nuss as a man male and this is not exactly the same as female in the US. And while the world tries to push us off Negra falls a new gender identity crisis people are going to anchor down on the rock and say with due respect to all with compassion for all male and female he made them and we will grow and nurture in the unique compliment mentary and cooperative togetherness. No I'm never year on the 2nd Sunday or 2nd Sabbath but I'm here today and I'm here to tell you. The church has as bright a future is your home to us as your home has as bright a future as you want to let Jesus make it but don't expect God to sweep down and do for you what he leaves in your hands to do something with he said I'll listen to you like there's nobody else on the face of the planet but why don't you have time to get to know me the creator Redeemer restore God so I'm almost done except this one thing I will not and I cannot preach a sermon like this and let any young man or any man in this congregation sit on their laurels after they've been called to rise up to higher ground. I want everybody here listening to me to know that it's time to rise up oh man of God God's Kingdom is waiting the kingdom that your house the kingdom in your business the kingdom amongst your friends we're not playing a game this is about eternal loss for son nobody in my home have I contended with more. Than my 3 sons but I'm teaching them. And largely have done it for better or for worse. To be men. The smaller me. There's a whole generation that needs a loving witness from a godly man so I'm calling the married men 1st to make a decision and the decision is this if you practice in secret sin. That before the sun goes down tonight you'll get the kids with somebody else and you'll have time to go for a walk and pray before you do it but just you'll find your wife and you tell her I want to be a true man of God and to do that I'm going to have to open some things up that I've hidden away I'm calling you to do it. I'm calling to those of you that struggle with missed prioritization of time and money to say you know what my family will not be perpetually neglected is I create financial security or significance for myself I'm calling you to recognize your current obligations before you change some huge yourself actual lives potential. Yeah you're going to let that opportunity go by because the opportunity with your boy you're not getting back. Or your daughter. I'm calling those of you whose life has been ruled by fear to make decisions. That the God of heaven could nerve you to actually have some convictions and followed them. Most of all. I'm calling you to a full and complete surrender to Jesus Christ. This is not a good age for cowardice. If ever there was an age we needed a few good men. Is today how do you become one don't read a book except this one and read it every day and give God permission to apply in any way made the world rise up and call you blessed and May the world be a better place because the God of creation and the God of redemption is the God of restoration to whatever chapter you're in for to you let's pray Lord forgive us. When we put people things or desires before you forgive us when we shed the sense of the cross in our lives and any idea of the 10 Szell suffering as we say no and disengage from things of the world that we learn to love things that are in the wrong place. The home suffers the church suffers society suffers forgive us Lord when we've not had enough courage and confidence that if you say go that's the way to go forgive us for neglect and forgive us for obesity and spur bowing down and worshiping at the Gods the altars of this age and I'm praying to learn make this. Like the godly men through the ages who could say they were salaried because they could hear the voice of truth and in their inmost beings they were true like a needle to the poor. These are my brothers they are my friends and clearly Lord to day you've marked out that they be called to higher ground. So never we can only go there with Jesus. We don't have the power to go there are. Were victimized by generational Senate and current choices and just pray now learn set is free set is free. And may we not forget. Though the wrong seems off so strong you are still. The ruler of this world and you can be and long to be ruler of our lives even so the Lord Jesus may have been. A name we pray in this media was brought to you by audiophiles a website dedicated to spreading God's word through free sermon audio and much more if you would like to know more about audio version or you would like to listen to more sermon leave it with W.W.W. audio verse top or.

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