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So Late: Stories From the Field

Jessica Trinh

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Recorded

  • December 19, 2020
    4:00 PM
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Their father in heaven we think you for your beautiful step but we thank you for an opportunity to hear the work that you are doing. In many mission fields across the world and especially Yes Because feel that you have called her to well that we ask that we can hear what you have to share the 2nd in Jesus' name. Just kitchen was born and raised in Southern California she grew up in and then is to teach and began her professional relationship with God when He harder in the ministry God bless chair with a job as the court leader for a Bible in photo under the by voice of prophecy Bible school in 2009 but in 2014 God God called her to overseas ministry in Southeast Asia she is now committed to be there until Jesus says otherwise she hopes to inspire as many people as possible to become a part of the overseas work as God keeps open the doors for places that have been difficult to reach Welcome back Jessica we're looking forward to hearing from you then it's been such a blessing to be able to share and speak of just the blessings that God has given to me you know when it comes to work overseas. I know that for myself like it was something that was in my heart and I was interested in but there is a large part of me that was just intimidated and sort of like but scared of this unknown like what does I mean know my going to the jungle and my going to be living in the desert and. It that that intimidation for someone like me very homebodies very introverted it kept me it kept me from really giving God the chance to ask because it felt like such this unreachable I'm touching will come I know. Just task but. And so I hope that what I share is able to encourage somebody and to sort of just give a glimpse and a taste of my experience and that to just really give the. I just really want to if to give the feeling that really anybody can do it if someone like me can do it any body can do it because you are willing and that you have a heart to tell people about Jesus because of what he is of who he is to you. So I have lived I have served a total of 3 years overseas in Southeast Asia. One year I served in a small country and so some of the stories I will be sharing will be 1st from. The No one country 1st They're both close countries and so I'm trying to tread carefully but I served in a small country and also closed country and then I am now presently and I have done now 2 years and in the 2nd in another country right next door and. And being in a close country. It's it's not like you know you can simply just knock on someone's door and hope that by giving them a good track the doors open the doors of heaven will open we had you know I know of experiences of people who who have but I'm it's a little more complicated just because of this the situation of the society and. There's definitely a lot of stigma in terms of what what a Christian is and you know who they have been portrayed because for the average person of where I have served. Being a Christian looks like what you would turn on the t.v.. It's sort of the immodest drinking just very open and brash kind of that's that's what they think of Christian it's what they see on t.v. And so you see you sort of have to work through the stigma and then the other aspects of other things that make it very challenging. In terms of culture and thinking and being able to bridge that and then so you can just hope that maybe you can give thousands of tracks and hope that it will somehow reach people there or there can be miracles but really the way to reach people in these places is through relationships Praise God you know you don't have to be a dog that's there but if you know how to make friends you can share Jesus so let me go ahead and appear. The overall title of my message it's going to be under so late. As I said I served in the 1st country that I served in it it's a small country about just 7000000 very devout Buddhist country there are the type this this picture is actually from a festival that happens yearly where everyone from the entire country will come and they will be there at 5 am they are the kind of it's a devout Buddhism where you are going to see people wake up in the morning to meet you will you have us a line of monks walking down and they will kneel as the monks passed by at 5 in the morning because they are hoping for a blessing from the monks upon their businesses upon the work that they will do that day and. Outside of every house you can see a little little what looks like no bird house it's actually a spirit house in this country and they believe that you need a house for the spirits. You know when you think of a country like this where your you need time. It's I think it's amazing that you don't need to be of any kind of special. Super professional skill how most of the people on the team that I work with when I was there we were able to get in the country simply because we were English speakers or native English speakers and we were there to teach English. And you know just to give you an idea of what it looks like to serve in this place. You know we had we would have been teacher classes and then we would be able to connect with their students are the places where we lived was right next to the English school and after after class every time they'd come over and we teach them how to like that's the inches right there we teach you how to make it with nutritional East likes in the who what is this you know and that is so good teacher it was at the end really you know and there there was a point where you were they were coming to our house and they're staying there for like not 830 until 103011 you know just but the thing is you make yourself available to them and you invite them into your lives like you do that all things like have birthday you know celebrate their birthday with them and just through those interactions of making friends they then invite you into their life and me would. By able being able to talk to them and teach them something better you know this young man in the middle with the birthday cake I remember when I 1st met him and I and he had already been studying at this English school for a couple of years now and I asked him So like what do you think of the school saying I like it here you know it's different you just it's different just even in the atmosphere and in the in the area when I'm in regular school you know it's cutthroat it's competition everybody's trying to step on each other and you know one up each other but here in the classroom the teachers they they make us like help each other up we're there to build each other we don't tear each other down we help each other no one looks at each other to feel stupid. Something so simple as that and he could experience the atmosphere of being and it. Christian influenced English school we were just an English school but the influence of our principals so permeated the atmosphere of the school that students could notice in you know what just some months after I met him this would have been probably about 7 months into my term 6 months into my term there he actually. He's he's over at our house as normal and he looks to his through to his teacher and he tells and he tells her Have you told them yet have you told the other teachers yet that I'm a Christian now and I remember like what were in the world to this come from Turns out he said that months ago one of the teachers invited me to the church and I could only join for the Sabbath school. But when I came into that Sabbath school and I saw a table with surrounded by people who were reading from this book and that the purpose of why they were reading this book was to become better people I knew that was it because in his culture for him when people want something better you pay money to the monks you want they and the monks they promise a better life they press promise better things they say give us more money and we'll give you better things give us more money and things will become better and even this 17 year old he was able to even distinguish and think that's not going to make people better that's not going to make life better. And he comes and compares to the Sabbath School of people still sitting around and he said These people are actually wanting to become better people that's the answer. Praise the Lord you know we are able to invite you know you invite them into your life in that we are able to invite them into blind studies. And in that since the time that I have been there you know just like bible studies when I say it's it's just simply every Friday night they have a little gathering where they eat together they sing songs and they do a Bible study it's that's that's all but through that simple Friday night study this picture on the side those are all the people that have come through the friendships of English teachers who then invited them to be a part of this little community and they became Christians they are baptized. They're all ages from like they're all in their young twenty's you know it's it blows my mind because like this is a country where it costs something to become a Christian you lose family you lose friendships you could be ostracized and you could be put in danger for making that choice. And here these young people make the choice because they find. It find the treasure of the gospel. You know at the young men in the striped shirt. You when you when you meet him he is so lively so gregarious you wouldn't have a clue about his acts story because if you want to know his backstory you'd find out he was a very sad man he was a very sad young man. He. He grew up when he was very on his parents' abandoned him. They at about 3 years old they never spoke to him they never came to see him and they only lived 30 minutes away from him and this tormented his mind to the point that in that country they don't even have really libraries so he would cross the border into the country next door just to go to the library to look up psychology books to try and understand why don't my parents love me how could they abandon me and he felt like he was always in the search for understanding to get it. And he. He started coming someone and one of the English teachers invited him to Friday night studies and he said that the moment that he got there he started reading the Bible he said I found I found what I've been looking for all my life he found it in God and you know at that time he had sort of he was actually just sort of getting into the club scene and he was drinking but when he came to these Friday night studies he stopped going he said that it's not as it doesn't what he gets from those Friday night meetings they were they were so much better than what everyone is looking for and drinking and come and he even changed his work schedule so that he could go at 10 days for the meetings he already was changing his work schedule like a Sabbath keeper for even become the believer. Later less than a year later he got baptized this young lady on the side I remember when I 1st met her and one of our teachers she she worked she was she was really she labored she was a labor of love for the student and. She art our friend the teacher she would she would messages she's like please pray for her please pray for my student you know she's sort of present she's dealing with these thoughts of just depression and suicide and you know our friend. Had her as a student there would be days that the student would come in drunk and to unleash class but she became friends with her and she invested in her and even to the point that you know there would be days there would be times that our friend would go bar to bar to bar looking for the student out of love to go find her. Now. She's left that life she found that God is a father turns out you know why she was so sad and so it was because she she didn't feel like she was getting the love and attention she needed from her parents. But she has Look at that smile on her face she has found Jesus and she has she is now becoming one of the 1st medical missionaries being trained for the country we could tell you a story after story after story you know but this is this picture. In the corner the top corner starting from the one in the blue shirt she was a p.t. the next one she was a professional hairstylist me I didn't really have I was just a religion major next to an English major next one he's a nurse next when she was a hotel events planner next when she was a lawyer next to a psychologist one of those are pastors none of those are at the Angelus were regular people who. Are simple a main inability have suffered a lawyer our main skill level was that we could teach English and we made friends with the people there and by the grace of God God blessed through prayers through their simply our act of willing to be a part of their life and show them a love that you know there's something this is my speculation but in a country where you don't know that there is such thing or believe that there's a deity or someone who cares about you it doesn't just affect you but it seems to seep into the rest of society. And many other relationships their view aren't very communal society but their love and relationships are very shallow I cannot tell you how many students you know I think I showed character to them and they fell over the moon I know of so many students that would say like Teacher Why do you care why you guys care about us care for us more than our friends and for the even closer ones who would tell us and open up and say like Teacher Why do you care about us already care about me more than my own family. They are so hungry and thirsty for love. That they that relationships is is the way to actually reach them it's what they're open to you can open the Bible to them but it's not going to come through but when you open a heart of loved them it finally shows them in a more practical and pragmatic way that what you believe actually makes a difference and matters. You know and so my experiences over in my 1st year experience made such a significant difference in. This going to work here. You know it can be lightning. Maybe it won't work so I finished my one year in that country and it was after I finished that when your that I was asked to actually go to the country where I am now I have now served 2 years in that country and I'm going to be there until she has told me otherwise maybe till he comes I don't know it's a country that is as a population of about 95000000 and it's about the size of California but that's 2 and a half times more people. It's a it's Buddhist but mainly in the country is ancestor worship inside the country itself there are $69.00 people groups of groups of that could be even like up 28002100000 people with their own culture and their own language and sometimes the people groups there can be believers of Animism to. Hindu ism to Buddhism Muslim and the country is also one of the last 5 communist countries there in the same way. Being in that kind of environment. I am actually our team is working with a center of influence when we say a center of influence is a place where we offer services to the community. To help us build relationships with people and then as we build relationships with mention within the gospel to those who are open. This is actually where we're at where I'm serving as a I'm simply teaching English. We also offer cooking classes. This is my English class and. The young men all the way at the end there he is he's like a little brother to me he. When I 1st met him. He you know he didn't know very much English but I actually met him inside the church and I talked to him and I and I'm wondering who this guy is because I'm like oh it's a young guy turns out he's not a believer. In a letter what who comes here and I'm like so you come here for your Saturday morning and like yeah and I was like so baffling because what young person sits through. Well not your typical very you know it's very simple church service. Gives up their Saturday mornings to sit through these meetings and then he actually even participates in the potluck and he actually told me that you know I come here because I can see the people there good people turns out this young men he started coming to the church because he had joined one of the English classes for that were free his English was so little but he became friends with the teachers and they invited him and he started coming to church and that's where I met him. It's He's a 22 year old young man just though a law student and now because of the relationship we have with them like he's not he's now working in our center of influence and he is he just has such a heart of gold but that's pretty much the concept you provide a service build a relationship and you bring them into your circle of influence to know my philosophy. I must have missed it but alongside with the the cooking classes and English class we actually have started up and there we go I've switched up the signs were actually even have a d.b.s.. Now we wouldn't be able to directly say that when we say that we're teaching English to the young kids in the community and we're teaching them how to cook reteaching them how to. Read hard during this year we actually taught them the days of creation and this was actually our 2nd year doing it all this all these kids pretty much they're off in the community not one of them is Christian Our friend who we asked to help she she I remember when she 1st helped us she was like wow I never would have imagined sharing the Bible with these little communist kids. You know. We this is our 2nd year because the 1st year we did it we did a little English camp the abs and we taught them to start the kids loved it so much love the singing with. The cooking and everything else that they said you know are you going to do it again this year I'm going to do it again this year like national identity get is all that's them they're making they're learning how to make better 10 being in food we teach them the health message and this is actually they think they came into our church that Saturday where even some of their parents came in to our church service to watch their kids sing these Christian songs I've got to join with Joy Joy Joy counted my heart or you know they're singing these Christian songs and the pastor is asking them Ok what happened on the 1st in what happened on the 2nd day in creation and they're answering Ok many of these kids have never heard any other story than the evolution story and we have no expose them to something different. Yet the country as I've mentioned it's an ancestor worship in country when we say ancestor worship him it's it's where they believe that you know after you pass you are to offer you offer to the spirits of your ancestors because you believe that they will provide you protection the spirits of your ancestors will provide prosperity and money and good luck and you know what you need for the day so what you can see here is this is actually an altar the picture you see there you can see I don't know if you can you can imagine one of those like communion altar that they haven't said the church about that size a little taller you can see all the food that is on there you see that little curly gray stuff that's all the incense that they burn it and that you know they'll burn one stick every day for prayer to their dead ancestors stick when the next day and they clean it after a whole year they finally clean it on the New Year's. What you see there is actually an altar of a poor family. You can tell you can see if you can see the bricks right there that's their wall there's no insulation there's no paint on it actually slept in there and she doesn't have AC she doesn't have a toilet in the have a heater it's a small. Room it's very small it's actually not even supposed to be there it's illegal because it's cheaper for her to buy a piece of land where you're supposed to only grow and then illegally build a little sort of small house to live on. And even as for poor she has you can see where she does put the money because you're going to put your money into what you can trust into what you think is going to help you get the success that's the altar of a poor family and it almost makes me sometimes I look at the things and it reminds me what do we put our money into what do we trust most to give us protection and success and prosperity. You know. When they offer the offer the food on this big silver platter this is an example fruit and they sort of you know they will put it on the platter put it on the altar pray for the spirits to come eat it that next picture there is looks like you're burning money but it's actually fake money they call it spirit money what they are because what they believe that. You can send money if you burn this money can send to the spirit world and you can send it up to your ancestors the ones that need it and so what you'll do is in on the certain days you'll go speak to a fortune teller knew ask that fortune teller you know what does what does grandma I mean over there the fortune teller will then tell you all grandma needs a new sweater or you know uncle in some. A new i Phone or something and so you'll get the it will buy Spirit money to burn now and now they also have little effigies that easily might have like a little picture of a paper i Phone or clothes of the latest hottest trends and then new sweaters and suits and whatever you'll buy those and bring them and will be sent over. To your dead relatives and just to give you an idea of what that kind of. What kind of war this is that they live in the reality of what the familiar with. There's a lady that I I know she's a very educated the she is one of the few. Women like in the country that has been selected to actually pursue a degree that is considered higher than a ph d. in the country. And she's a very wonderful lady are our staff or center of influence has actually partnered up with her and her staff to do on the charity trip because she wanted to offer clothes and food to the needy for their new years so she's and she's just a she has just a wonderful heart of compassion she's a devout Buddhist. And she is when I say she's a devout Buddhist she is that type with compassion or she is the type that she will stop at great sites where there are unmarked graves because they believe that anyone who doesn't have family or relatives to pray for them while there is deceased and offer them food and burn the money that they will wander the world never able to move on to the next life and well one day. She stops at the cemetery and she prays and then she heads home because she's going to go meet with another friend a very high level educated Buddhist who has the ability to speak to spirits she gets home and she speaks to this friend and as they're speaking a Spirit possesses her enters her and she starts to speak with the voice not of her own and starts to act in not her own mannerisms and the friend then starts to ask the questions Who are you wary from why have you entered and when to call her Mrs. And the Spirit then says we have been watching every day as Mrs Not stops at the gravesite and prays for the. For the wandering spirits we don't have anyone to offer us food we don't have anyone to pray for us and offer incense for us we want you to be certain to offer us a plate of food and make us food the friend then says Ok done we will do it please exit out of Mrs not we will hold the ceremony tomorrow or the next day this is not our friend they cook up the food they put on a silver platter just like that picture and they put it on the floor they then go downstairs and they burn up spirit money burning up money praying for the spirits to come in and bite the invite spirits into the home to eat the food they go back upstairs to that silver platter and they find the platter is on fire in a blaze but while it is an unfair it is not burning anything outside of that platter though the floor is flammable flammable that night Mrs not has a dream she has a dream that the spirits of orphans and all people and all these people look so happy as they are eating the food that they have made for them and she realizes when she wakes up that. I have done it I have accomplished what I needed to serve these needy spirits. You know this is not a standalone story I have a friend who says that oh yeah it's it's not unheard of to see fire just happen out of nowhere near gravesites this is the kind of reality that this country has used to sometimes we forget the kind of spiritual battle that we are in simply because we live in a place where we don't experience in the same way a friends that is a reality. Now most people you know I know that when I was 1st thinking of you know going overseas and I imagined like living with an open sky not sure if I wouldn't have to pump my own water and wondering of snakes going to fall on me from the trees although there are places like that but. If someone were to ask me what serving overseas looks like it's a living and jungles as it seem to blind men see again or dead people coming back to life. There's one story that I think encapsulates what it means to actually serve overseas this is a group of our friends and there's a couple you can see in the middle there I'm going to call them here in town. I met them because of my teammates the Cheney family the Cheney family arrived to the country before I did and they decided that they would make friends with this couple who owned a vegetable stall. They were going to only go to this couple and buy that shows only from them so that they could develop a friendship and a report when I arrived they introduced me to this couple and I decided yeah you know what I want to do the same I want to be friends with this pensionable couple that will sell a couple. Only buy vegetables from them and you know there would be days sometimes I would sit with them and they're just cutting up the pineapples and putting it down in front of their stall and just sitting and chatting with them about different things and they became our friends you know anything that we need it we could go to here in town for you know if we need to find something they knew how to get press and they knew how to get for the best price and. Especially the chain Panteley the chain family became like best friends with them and this couple you know when our other teammates. I'm going to call them the. Smiths. The Smith family in particular his next trip the Smith family there are there at that he makes when they landed it was Hugh and 10 that took their vegetable truck helped us go meet the Smiths pick up their lunch pick up their children pack it in and this was the nose this was way in the evening well out in the airport way from the city drove with us drove them back help unload everything help them get settled in a little bit you know close to midnight when we needed something human Temora there for us they were so helpful unfortunately one day he went to have they lost their vegetable business but you know the Cheney family they really because they were so close they decided you know what we're going to go ahead and hire tamped as a helper in the house and chief and you know at least they can get some income. And so they started going and. One day shortly after the Smith family arrived. I get a phone call from this from the Smith family. And they tell me I think he was stealing from us you know I heard Allen her on there you know they have been so helpful you know it must have been miscommunication maybe there's some kind of translation you know mix up I'm sure whatever happened I'm sure that's not what the case is they said yeah you know you're right they've been so helpful and then a few weeks later the Smith family calls me up in the city and the husband tells me I just saw a huge stealing from my wallet with my own eyes we then gathered together as an as a team in this emergency meeting to discuss what do we do. And from that meeting we decided this is going to be a chance for us to demonstrate God's love and forgiveness so the next day. John Smith talks decides I'm going to go with them and we're going to talk to you about it and I was going to be translator John then says to him I want to speak with you about something I saw on the other day when you were at my house I saw you take my knee from my wallet. He sort of denies it and he's like me and sorry you know I wasn't stealing money it's you know I know in your culture and you shouldn't beast the touching each other stuff but that's that's not what was happening I was just looking at it while it I shouldn't have been touching your stuff I'm sorry. John He then says I saw him take the money and put it in your pocket here and he denies it he sort of joking it's like Are you sure you know are you did you did you count the money in your wallet in China he then he he says I want to still be friends but I need to be able to trust you but you know my daughters love your daughters I still want to invite you over to my house as friends he looks at Hugh in the eye and he says I forgive you I want to still be friends I want to still have your daughters come over to my house and play with my daughters. Here finally quiet and he says I'm sorry what I did was wrong thank you for giving me. You know we were surprised because we weren't sure how this was going to come out and then a few weeks later the chain Fallon family realised that Hugh stole money from them as well and when the chains like approachable and he denied it and you know the chains when I say they became like really good friends family gatherings they were at each other's houses and this was really hard especially for the chains because they had just started reading the Bible with the wife to him. And he was but because of this they were ready they were ready to give up the friendship but. The husband you know as he's thinking and contemplating he looks around him and he sees all the people just burning and praying to the spirits. And he remembers that you know what we're in on land that is that is full of spiritual that is in the spiritual control of demons. And so he comes to our team and he says team I can't do this alone I want to fast and pray for you Will you join me. We said yeah let's fast and pray we're going to pray as and pray for a week for. One week after the day after we finish the week he'll messages in light and he says My heart is telling me to talk to you that night he confesses to you like everything he confesses that you know ever since his family lost their vegetal business the been struggling for money and Hugh admitting that he actually stole from from the change 3 or 4 times already he admits that he did steal from the Smiths. And then in tears he tells and he says I don't want to be this kind of person anymore I know I need change and I know I need God That's the power of fasting and prayer my friends we're not perfect people or any it's because of the Spirit of God pricking through simply on prayers sometimes we forget that we are in a spiritual battle it with evil angels fighting for souls in a territory under the rulership of spirits sometimes it's easy to just work things up and say look that's human nature but no it's big cuz the devil knows how to attack our weaknesses we're not in a battle of flesh and blood and if Imagine if more of our believers were fasting and pray how could the spirit. Ever since that time Hugh started reading like pretty much anything it would give him he knew I would tell him of the verses she would read it gave us that surprise he would read it you know and the thing is though it was a little bit haphazard he just start flipping the Bible so you know you can ask him like oh would you read from today. So we were wondering if he was how much she was understanding she weeks later. Eli learned he was still from him again and this really shook him but our team talked together and he said you know look how many times as Christians do we feel God over and over Hugh hasn't even accepted Jesus yet can you really blame him. Eli then to set decides to talk to Hugh and she was apologetic and he's confessing in his kneeling before him and he's telling him he's telling him like you know I just I'm so sorry you know maybe I just need to go away from you far away from you and stay away from you and you know I shares with him about prayer about how to pray how to confess and how to ask help from Jesus and it's like this light bulb goes off for Hugh and he's like wait I need to ask help from God Oh this whole time I've been trying it in my own strength. And so we decided that you know I'd be good to have a more structured formal Bible study with him and on the 1st day that I go to meet you this guy will shut up you know he's talking and he says he's seeing this when I 1st started reading the Bible there were 2 things that I read in the Bible that were unlike anything else I've ever read. I've you know the 1st is that God treats everybody the same doesn't matter if you're rich or you're poor he treats everybody the same no matter how you treat God He still treats you the same. And the other and the 2nd thing that I found about God is the mercy of forgiveness I've learned that the mercy of God is amazing there is nothing like it in our culture it's very hard to forgive but the mercy of God it's asked his brother see is magnificent God is powerful it's like you know the bad thoughts in your head he gives this power to just knock those bad thoughts out of your head you just need to be real and honest with God and tell him who you are and the moment that you are wholeheartedly honest with God It's like you are stretching out your hand open to him and he can finally take your hand up to pull up and say. You know I. Studied with him but I knew that he hadn't least read Genesis 12 and 3 and so I asked him about Genesis one and he was sharing what he thought he said you know even like I mentioned the importance of being honest before but when I read the 1st chapter it became clear when God spoke everything that he said was true and it was real Let there be light there was light sun and moon there was a sun a moon never was there a time when God said one thing and something else happened. And I realized that you need to be honest when you come to the Bible in all of my 45 years I haven't found anything like the Bible and I feel like I'm coming to God so late I wish I had known that this is what the Bible and God were about when he said that I was humbled and a little rebute I was humbled because sometimes I forget how much of a treasure the Bible is. That there are people who are waiting their whole lives to learn what we know from the Bible and how often we take it for granted and forget how precious precious it is to people who have never had a 2nd when I say I was rebuked because when I think about it it's not really he was fault for coming to God so late he didn't know what was inside or know who God was like How could he come to God if he didn't know the bigger fall is with someone like me who knows who God is knows what God is like and knows it's in the Bible and didn't get to hew sooner Romans 1014 How then shall they call on Him whom they have not believed and how shall they believe in him of whom they have not heard and how shall they hear without a preacher again. Not like you isn't on the Internet it's not like he doesn't know how to use social media even in an age of television and you know he has a Smart Phone He has all those things but it wasn't until there was a person to actually bring him and show him the Gospel that he finally understood what the Bible was all about how many people have we missed that are so hungry and waiting to know what the Bible has waiting for decades because maybe we are caught up in chasing something else that we think is important. You know. And I want to maybe I want to come a little closer to home you know how many times do we also come to God So like so late right unlike you we know who God is we know who what's in the Bible and yet still how many times do we do everything ourselves and still and then come to God last and we come to God so late when the Bible and God are what we should be seeking 1st in all things not only that friends it is really late it is solely for us in the timeline of mankind in its history and so I just want to you know I would like to put that out for us out there maybe there is someone who knows that you you should be putting you should be coming to God 1st and you haven't been and you sort of leave him after the side when you should be coming to God before it becomes too early. Or maybe there is someone who is. You know you know that you are holding on to something and it is keeping you from God. And you want to tell God that you know what it's really like it's so maybe it's time to let this go it's time to let go of whatever is holding us here on this earth because we have been here too long. We think that we're waiting for Christ not Christ is waiting for us to finally let go because it is so that my friends if maybe if any of those 2 things apply to you and like to prepare you for those 2 things. Let's go ahead and pray your heavenly Father God Lord I I want to pray for many of us some of us are just so self-sufficient God and we just what we just want to feel like we do something and we act 1st morn. But how much farther and how much deeper in the work could go if we would simply come to you 1st come to you 1st whether it's through the Bible whether it's to prayer and fasting Father God I want to pray for those of us who struggled to come to you 1st learn and instead we wait to come to you so late when we know who you are God help us to simply humble ourselves to simply trust you and take you at your word that you will never and no ice cast anyone who comes to God then we would simply seek you 1st and put you 1st and give all our heart to see you 1st and I want to pray for for anybody someone that may be struggling to hang on to something in this world that what whoever that one of his Sara trying to surrender and they know that is between you and them God. Were to ask that you give them strength I ask that you give them the courage to keep coming to you and falling before you at your feet to surrender even even though they may not feel that they are willing but you will be willing to admit that he would offer it up to you because Lord it is so only you've been waiting on Lord we think you that you are God. Then though we may come to you so late how merciful you are that so long as we come to you wholeheartedly with our full heart and so earnestly you you take us where we are Lord I ask that you be with each and every person. But the story's main courage them to know that it doesn't take rocket science it doesn't take incredible skills simply takes a willing heart and now to serve and share about you no matter where you are matter where we may be Father God. Me think you for your grace to pray all this in Jesus' name even in. 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