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Key Questions Before Marriage

Phil Mills Sr.

Presenter

Phil Mills Sr.

Dermatologist in Northern Georgia

Sponsor

Recorded

  • April 29, 2006
    3:00 PM
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there is been a pleasure to be with you for this weekend for this important topic relationships dating for future happy marriages we left in the first lecture will look to God I feel in marriage for godly homes producing homes to strengthen our resistance against invitation we saw how Satan hasn't happened there in fact God gave Adam and Eve to strengthen him in his resistance in patients of Satan particularly attacked the weekend and I think I said thereof that strengthen Avenue so in his result is a Satan attacked the weekend Adam and his result so we tax the family and tries to keep her from being a godly influence that could be in this world then last time we look at God 's ideal in advocates on God 's ideal and culture it was revealed in how he had an court before marriage there were three requirements while needed to be able to support a family in an ongoing head home we had a evening alone provided to him without a large mortgage he had basic training done it name the animals he had an occupation he could attend and keep the garden in the then he had this criteria for marriage and that is self-control he had been taught by God not the forbidden tree so you not only a throttle and brakes and necessary for a happy family relationship and then he had the third which was sleep will trust you you know if you don't have the history certainly the first two if you're being awakened it's like a cell we can afford to trust in the Lord of this morning we look good sound predictors of success in this afternoon we want to look at key courtship questions last serious hence father in heaven as we look over this final time forward together looking at the grid that you given us to guide this help protect us from making and in the and the state and bring us great unhappiness right of the Spirit in the year lets from speaking the wrong thing in healthy ears to listen in a way that when I stumble over words go here I meant to say what you meant to have said this despite the weakness of man the strength will come through revealed Jesus to us we thank you for hearing and answering this prayer Christ thing in remember taking a classic physical diagnosis right here in Loma Linda we learned that to make a correct diagnosis of the disease you have to know what questions to ask and understand the significance of the answers learning the right questions of medicine really wasn't the most romantic or exciting part of medicine but it was necessary to get the right diagnosis in asking the right question is also necessary if you want a happy home is not the most exciting or romantic part of our presentation but if you want questions big I assure you of safety assortment of talk about this afternoon Proverbs fourteen fifteen says the simple believe every word but the prudent man look up well that is going there several words for full used in Proverbs Solomon one type of Poole is here translated as simple the simple fool basis is decisions his thoughts his philosophy on superficial knowledge without careful investigation courtship is an area of life immense consequences in this area we can't afford to bid for simple fools we must avoid basing our decisions on superficial appearances trusting our own in impulses or impressions we must establish with careful certainty that our steps are safe our direction good our destiny you can easily be simple it comes quarter advice for those were dating psychologist and author Doctor James Dobson says take time to check your assumptions with your partner before committing yourself the marriage it is surprising how often men and women who are you sure matrimony without ever becoming aware of major differences patient between is a lot better this morning for whole dating requires careful research and investigation beneath the track surface it requires a thorough diligent study of our own habitual thoughts and feelings in habitual thoughts and feelings of one we think may be an appropriate life 's partner Ellen White noted a problem common to young people in portrait they don't have sales resistance when it comes to marriage review Herald January twenty six eighteen eighty six the user trust altogether too much that involves they should not give themselves way too easily or be captivated to readily by the winning exterior rollover those who want a successful marriage must ask the right questions before dating them while they and they must legally have the answers before proceeding book one question at the very top of the list this essential first question underlies all the other questions it was a European boy who taken a fancy to your with eleven different countries and so he sent a letter to Alan light and he said in this letter he said would you investigate this girl for Rome I took that very seriously and socially talking Earl J various investigations into rollback this young man here's the first line letter Mrs. K Young lovers twenty one I knew that you should have a wife that could make your happy home I asked her in the tree goes on to say that the questions that you say she was taking a process seriously but what was her name and the questions more there be happiness for this young man is the online happens she sought to find what is a young lady would have been necessary feminine touches that would bring happiness to a union in the course of questions for the man does he have a necessary manlike touches will make the two a positive happy union the first question that she tells a young man about a perspective life 's partner by five three sixty will the one you Mary bring what happens to the same focus is brought to you in questions of a woman is to ask about a prospective husband we saw that this morning messages for young people for fifty let the woman who desires a peaceful happy union inquire using mindful of begin the mother or happiness why is outlined below Melissa is will it be mindful of what is we learn and this is repeated in another letter to the woman messages via Google four thirty nine has either traits of character that will make her what the new company was also counseled to evaluate the relationship of the genuine components of happiness messages young people four thirty nine will this new relationship prove a source of what you want in these interactions tell us with the prior writing others in her first part of her instruction on home with only three things number one happiness is important number to happiness is possible and number three happiness is often missed the underlying reason for any other request to this happiness will the marriage bring happiness can you bring happiness to a home where the one you Mary bring happiness to your home you see God wants us happy that's his joy our happiness you want to know what really turns got on making somebody happen for the likes of the Satan worked so hard to make us on because even striking God is in heaven because his children Ecclesiastes two twenty six to the man who pleases him God gives wisdom knowledge and what happiness now I like to ask your question here and I don't mean to embarrass anybody over but just if you'd be willing to do this for my instruction put up your hand if you came from a really really happy to really really would apply some a home where both your mother and your father were happy both really how many of you want a home that is happier than your parents it should come as no surprise that many homes are not him after leading the way the Lucy flower professor of sociology and director of the Center on aging at the University of Chicago studied in happy marriages plenty to choose from with colleagues to review the national survey of families and households done by the University of Wisconsin and nineteen eighty seven eighty eight with a follow-up five years later nineteen ninety two through ninety four several of her findings I found particularly interesting first story out of for unhappily married adults are married to someone who is happy with the marriage imagine being in a marriage where one is happy with the relationship all the others miserable it said even imagine such a broken marriage relationship yet that's the best that could be said about the the home of at least one of them was happy whatever that meant it's so important to be able to accurately answer this Western about whether our spouse will bring happiness or whether we will bring happiness into the home not just for a little bit but over time do we know the ingredients that bring lasting happiness in the same study the vast majority of divorces in fact seventy four percent took place in adults who reported that the first of the study that they had happy marriages that was only five years before someone could say well will get married and see if a spouse bring happiness to the home and if they don't will get a divorce and find some video Stilwell unfortunately the latest data suggest that those who divorce are seldom Barry is fighting what people say your best shot at a happy marriage is the first time ever each succeeding trial is more the odds are higher than it will bring in a longitudinal fifteen year study done by editing a University of Illinois psychology professor a specialist in subjective feelings of well-being life satisfaction person can say that psychology of them you have to set that way instead of happiness a study of twenty four thousand people living in Germany until Doctor Dina 's research found that the happiest people all appear to have strong social relationships interestingly his study published in the Journal of personality and social psychology March two thousand three found that most people are no more satisfied with life after marriage than they were prior they were no more happy married and when they were single so the question will you bring will shape brain will he bring happiness to the home is important and happy now if they're not happy now one what are they looking for to make them happy the study found that people who already satisfied with their lives before marriage were more likely to stay for a longer people will get married and stay married are more satisfied than average long before the Manchester remember meeting sharing right your level in just the first girl that I've run into that planning on the as perfectly happy to be single the new somebody else the America to have Jesus Wilson Jimmy and that was one of the key components like persons looking for I wanted to find somebody that was satisfied with Jesus because I knew I couldn't satisfy a person might have been anything in the finding of Doctor Peter is simply documenting what inspiration is previously revealed by four page five oh three is not one marriage in one hundred results with the last word against you are ninety nine is a troubling us and this is because many couples like the pilot on the Titanic ignoring the laws of happiness and warning flags of trouble had to redo what are we seeking to find out why our investigation before and during courtship and dating was home to happy that the question that's how can we know to answer this question we need to understand the ingredients of home happiness what makes one home happy in another unhappy is it just bad karma I miss my wife's bread tastes good visit chance or is it science what makes for happy homes chance for signs like to suggest that some there are ingredients for happiness the recipe to follow if you leave one of the ingredients out it will be like leaving the salt out of the bread that made the nourishment but it pays there won't be happens and so I have to ask when I am considering Mary and the crucial ingredient on my ingredients to make a happy home I will some crucial component the missing and the two combined this is not only an important first question for hardships it's an important first question for remedial problems in troubled marriages sometimes marriages are in trouble and it they don't really know why the couples that understand the women we talking about the South it's the first question to be asked in marriage counseling in my view do the parties understand how happiness results in a bring happiness although it's too bad to ask a question like better late than never how do you determine if someone will bring happiness to the home do you know what brings happiness dog we must not be satisfied with some vague abstract metaphysical concept that brings happiness the home let's look at a few absolute requirements it's by no means a complete list but it's representative I've chosen a major ingredients that you want in a home to be happy CSI narrative that brings happiness the studies are uniformly clear about this marriage doesn't bring some magical like sore that makes you unhappy people who never change suddenly will happily ever after him a him first and most important point in happiness this understand that only cries can bring happiness is the author of joy it is not the center of your life and in the center of a future hall you cannot have happiness in your presence is wireless of joy David saying at your right hand are pleasures for evermore now there are two words that I always come to bread when I either have to say if or when I have to hear these two words are I assume bias the single most important area to explore the first area to explore is this question you can say I assume that she was a Christian I assume that he was a Christian don't take it for granted that because you met them in charge Hinojosa at Ivanhoe Sabbath school where they have Christian I went through Christian schools they are centered in Christ and this is much too important a question we've do I assume or guesswork but how does Explorer how can you know if somebody is truly given their life to the Lord can you know you ask questions and you evaluate if the individual is walking the walk not just talking the talk have both unreservedly surrendered to Christ this is the center of your life the center of your relationship I like Proverbs twenty three twenty six and got translation my son give me your heart to let their eyes find happiness in my ways that's where happiness is about daily praying and studying the Bible and following the Bible 's instruction is their joyfulness in doing this or is it tedious and where is Brooks is it something I can't wait to do but there was found Jeremiah explained in and I deviated my word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of my heart my dad couldn't wait to get up in the morning three of four whenever the sooner the better busy with their spend time talking with the Lord and pray yes Paul's would get sweaty he was so excited about reading his Bible I met a couple who are known to some of this church they they spent and time with my my children right shoulder they had been involved with the ministry but now they're not attending church anywhere they live not too far from us May forty five minutes and we try to get them involved in our local church and listen to their story they were involved with this ministry very active in a ministry not hearing in public but I found out they found it hard to get up Sabbath morning at seven thirty because they had a special Bible study that they were working with had to fix breakfast for this personal they were having people lives with them and enter then hires him the church Christianity focus much better than what they experienced don't live let this type of individual fool you into thinking they are committed Christians if you obey and do right now why will show you the way and Billy with having a Psalm ninety seven eleven hundred nineteen fourteen okay here instructions brings as much happiness as verse twenty seven of the same song I will give them as they bring me happiness in verse seven the Aqua theater I find happiness in your life if they are not finding happiness in the word of God and obeying it there is something wrong Christian then they both attempt area both attempting to be active soul winners white Bible study not from a sense of duty but it is of the favorite activities which engage in Luke fifteen seven I send you that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repetitive you imagine an angel when anything happen to come down to this Earth that's kind of nice in heaven I hear the weather is nice scenery is nice friends are nice there are leaving open and can you imagine Sarah down telling her friend Jerry Bill I hear I go again to go to got to go down there spend some time with Philip is public life can't wait till this miserable thing is over with that's all there there is joy in half over one center that represented their adding the work they're doing they can hardly wait to the wonder of heaven the beauty of having the glory of heaven is not as desirable as the smog of Loma Linda thinking Wenzel visit each support the church with their time and money with a grateful heart wishing they could give more acts twenty thirty five it is more blessed makes one happy anymore to be in the begin of intimacy I like my wife just loves to give she loves the catalogs to get some address that you can give gifts to the poor people and overseas her sister Dena the only reason she has a part-time income is certain she has some money to give and is prayer meeting I have it for both degrees ten twenty five not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together as the matter some is Friday we ate with the Jones and countless telling how this last week he just was anxious and happy to be going to permit it supporting the program wasn't some dirt relisten to I was just interested in it was a joyful duty they believe that it may have a good time supporting doing not reluctant not because well you have to it's their process is no group permitted maybe you make the motion is when you want to know if the one you think to unite your life with with they are going to prayer meeting by going because God is there because you're there if these things don't make them happy their presence of Christ until using the Pharisees were religious but they didn't have the joy and peace of Jesus and worship is their criticism of others down all of this you looking for a friend not a one time here are they seeking to rid themselves of these types of evils though they may trip from time to time Ephesians four thirty one says get rid of all now bitterness rage and anger brawling and sent slander along with every form of malice I was trying to get rid of these to either of a couple syllable over the world by how they spend their time and money type of reading may choose how to dress what music they listen to what foods they eat what sports they engage in and watch first John two fifteen below the world neither the things that are in the world of any man love the world the love of the father is not in him you cannot if they have the love of the father the love below if they don't know what the world and then is either restless lacking in the wicket are like the troubled sea let's just always needing something always sung that everything some music has to be playing some thing going all the time for this piece of themselves is there a problem with moral purity second Timothy two twenty is there anything larger other off-color jokes are suggestive words is there any improper behavior are your second animated twenty fifth Fleet also use the last what is it for you for loss but follow righteousness with them good call on the Lord sure first Peter two eleven abstaining from flashing less which war against the soul is there in temperance to the use addictive drugs such as nicotine alcohol caffeine we can put with their weaknesses and spouses but no devices are the careful with their diet exercise lifestyle and are unhappy doing it it's been about if it kills me busy happiness doesn't come from bearing your spouse most of the time are they living in such a way that they will not prematurely bring sickness and death of the family and leave you without a spouse writing put down is their language help me in counseling and are they loose with their lips using proven for one was look at the next is there an underlying unity between the two of you behold how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity some hundred and thirty three one and so many for the happiness and prosperity of the married life depend upon the unity of the parts how unitedly a marriage this person do you enjoy similar activities you don't need to be identical but they should be complementary the most valuable healthy lifestyle we both what you put in evidence here share similar philosophies views respond to similar speakers are your goals similar similar is their unity and use of time and money you should be united on those things you hold this core values are those core values based on the word of God one Lord one faith one baptism your marriage will be as pleasant as you that is actually what increases the pleasure of a good marriage overtime because over time guess what to get more and more than nine in unity is important part of happiness but unity come from the presence of Christ then is there a habitual courtesy be peaceable gentle showing complete purchasing all Titus three twelve new English translation is there sympathy for others pain or trouble or is there callous and difference allow some sort how to treat animals observe whether there is a gentle Curtis Curtis 's or is there harshness and rudeness to be put down others and just by the insult the next is a very crucial character quality for home happiness are they deferential or are they willful because licensing marriage or so some researchers have concluded that all Americans for health fights and this is just normal some say that these never resolving can't resolve one sedentary marriage is nature 's way preventing us fighting with strangers don't live his life reference fighting and disagreements are not necessary plan you don't need as one suggested to set time every week the site so that you can argue good news saying it tries to get us to accept as normal and in incompatible that which we should reject the evil he does the same thing whatever he said homosexuality and traded normal normal but twice are necessary and this is how God takes care of it deference deference is yielding your preferences and even humans try to think of something that Sherry and I disagree over and I finally bought one for Sherry 's eyes overhead lights glare and it hurts my eyes if I don't have enough light intensity well what do we do stand at room solve the problem we could fight about it I could go over and flip the switch on and she flip it off is that you can have an overhead light on and off same time well here's our settlement in my house on the head of the house I insisted but it's her when when I lose him now when I lose Jesus and become willful you don't have to guess what I read more willfulness not only me but in my family I am planting in my own life and the lives around what does Jesus know plan deference that gentle seed and I like that crop because it yields gentle deference in meeting those around we have trashy neighbors not two miles away on my house in North Georgia apparently there's some drug addiction and others that we are way out in the country where up on a hill you can't see anything around the snow houses we are well hidden but I come to our our road when we have a nine tenths of a mile gravel road fireplace aware of quite isolated but we have to go up a road two miles from us and just fractional road horrible so we first moved in and we could demand our rights supply out who is littering turn them in horse and maybe angry with us we have no influence with them they might come over judiciously be right then right we decided on a different plan we go out we pick up the trash about two miles from home that road comes in first Sunday we dated sixteen bags to quickly drop more drives are the bags were stinky and we have to pay to throw them away the and his affect is that antagonizes the everyday would pick it up as a drive of the road to get out run run great family together and you know other neighbors have now joined in we have been for are you just moved into this place and they have said let's set up a schedule so that we pick this up Abraham was deferential toward lot Abraham was old or deserve a choice but when live in Abraham 's employees were fighting them and said look you just choose the place you want and I'll take them at first Joshua you got to unnecessarily luxurious areas the place that remains negative chosen the first place when he took what was left of studying this aspect of the potential life partner thoroughly willfulness is often seen in those of the moral problem in fact there are often several problems that go along with moral impurity dishonestly almost always if they do if they lie about anger argumentativeness and then willful and this may be accompanied by an apparent religiousness that's what tools people make no friendship with an angry man and with the furious man thou shalt not go second Peter to give them that walk after the flesh and the lust of uncleanness and despise government presumptions are they self-willed they are not afraid to speak evil of dignitaries Titus one seven not self-willed not soon angry Proverbs twenty two five from the new Jerusalem Bible thorns and snares lie in the path of the willful liver values life will stay the distance I would find out if her special friend is deferential do they insist on their own way what happens when the will is crossed I dated a girl for a short time was a very sweet person this is a different person and learn to get her way by the things we know some people try to get their way by the bad anyway when she learned away by vigorously drilling of deference is just a different way of getting your way but when finally she couldn't get her way it became obvious there was a problem how do they relate when things don't go exactly the way they wanted are based on burn or self-willed others easily angered at a critical of authority figures they get along well with others of a friend noticed this comment anonymous home one oh seven do not try to compel each other to do as you wish manifestations of self will destroy the peace and happiness of the home that's what were looking at let not your married life is one of contention if you do you'll both be unhappy the kind and speech and gentle in action knowledge of the notice this next raise what is it saying reopening gives a what your own wishes what important instruction giving out your own wishes Jesus does this all the time for us watch whale your words for they have a powerful influence for good of really talk about that this morning but notice is not only what we say but how we say I allow no sharpness becoming your voice to know Hale and Ray are both the same substance you can say the truth and heard people bringing into your United life the fragrance of Christ likeness this had happened home will you be like this will the one you are dating the likeness and then love you order and organization El Salvador I used to work was always at that time completely clean complaining prepared for any visit ready for surprise and it was impressive under the old covenant uncleanness disorder disorganization work illustration of sin idols could be worshiped haphazardly without regard for neatness certainly our cleanliness you can worship idols you go to the Temple any old getup you wanted but God worship was much different cleanliness order and organization will rigidly enforced the house the house of worshipers big houses of the worshipers lived in were to be completely clean the bodies of the worshipers were to be fully washed in the new covenant we have the slut washing service God wants cleanliness cleanliness is not option for Christian home notice what the in Genesis Jacob said for revival presented was household Genesis thirty five two and all that were with him put away the strange gods are among you and be clean and change second Chronicles nine four I figured that today's English version speaking out for a visitor to Solomon 's son she saw that the food was service table the living quarters for his officials the organization of the palace staff uniforms they wore the clothing of the serpents who waited on him and feast and the sacrifices offered in the Temple it left her breathless and amazed organization detail or King Hezekiah second Chronicles thirty one to reestablish the organization of the priests the Levites under which they each have specific duties and so forth I have to tell you in my Wichita office I didn't have a very neat desktop was a mess I began to come under conviction does not speak well about the God I worship it's not representative that there is a false witness it undercut my witness regretted inviting the patient send there was my desk all clutter one day I determined by God 's grace and not leave my office until the dust was going cleaned up and enjoy that evening I put away or put away our God about I found an untidiness is just another way for me to procrastinate staff noticed it immediately I gave them my testimonial my daughter loves order and organization which of course forced me to continue our hollow must testify to the God we worship we can't be happy notice that at some point in a wife and mother cannot they call agreeable and happy unless he possesses a lover order preserve your dignity and has the government therefore all who fail on these points should begin at once to educate themselves in this directory and cultivate the very things were in is the greatest slap this is so important define determined to find out this information on anyone your thinking of Mary one well ordered well disciplined family tells more in behalf of Christianity and all the sermons the kindergarten or my son will hire such a family gives evidence that the parents have been successful in following God 's directions and that their children will serve him in the church their influence growth for as they embark to receive organ the father and mother find helpers and their children who give to others the instruction received a memo the neighborhood in which they live is help bring that they have become enriched for time and return the whole family is engaged in the service of the master and by the godly example others are inspired to be faithful and true to God in dealing with his flock is beautiful for its own the question is she or he habitually named Heidi orderly and organized how do you know if there's a love for checkout is their planning and scheduling his room neat and tidy is that made things put away I close my Wii mystery on three other areas finances is one of the three common areas of disagreement this is a very important area of all couples should have the fundamentals before marriage John six twelve and they were filled he said his disciples gather up the fragments that remained that nothing be lost you see we are not owners of anything were stewards and so the question is their recognition of God 's ownership in all things is money spent for beneficial or display remember that our actions and thoughts are deeds not words RC document the smart what kind of harvest will vanity produce harms than more will need to be expended as a lever and there will always be something more to display fashionable and expensive clothing for ourselves our children luxury cars extravagant homes of elegant furnishings we must have the later center for all women our membership must be in the finest country club our vacations to exotic places our children will need to be schooled in the most exclusive of the local academies each of these expenditures as a scene with a further harvest Satan will aim to absorb every penny not to benefit our families not to feed the hungry and clothe the naked not give our children the proper education not influence our neighbors were heaven but the increase pride in oneself you know in the wilderness the children of Israel gave up their jewelry to build the house of God in the early Christians did exactly the same thing you said is adoringly not do that outward adorning inflating the hair and wearing of gold are putting on of apparel and Paul said in like manner also that women adorn themselves in modest apparel was shamefacedly some sobriety not with braided hair or gold or pearls or possibly went right though this is fashionable by the world we as Christians looking for the soon a very of Jesus have a much better place to invest our money and engagement and wedding jewelry in place of this we can give it to advance the cause of God this giving his seat so on no produce a harvest time hastening the coming of Christ for his bride in the great wedding of which are women's role in type is money spent on amusement for selfish pleasure is there lover going to shows movies renting videos expensive restaurants professional sports is money expended on the latest video games is money expended for fictitious books and magazines these are the questions you want to evaluate if you want a happiness happy homes so the problem wherefore do you spend money for that which is not bread and your labor for that which satisfy his their self-denial for others needs you both savings is their avoidance of death is their generosity for the poor is their faithfulness and ties and offerings by every penny we spend we shall whether we love God supremely and our neighbor as ourselves were sowing seed and then Haitian village and rural consistency are the parties careless and work habits were as their patient thorough diligence is their only talk about doing better as the follow-through proverbs twenty seven twenty three and be thou diligent to know the state of my flocculant wealth of I heard the details matter brothers and sisters you must find out if the person 's that you're dating a thinking abating if the teachers and the work supervisors give a good recommendation of your potential spouses work habits their industry the reliability that's why it takes two four years to work through this stuff Amy for the dealer for the slack hand but the hand of the diligent maketh rich Proverbs said that enforces proper software for the hand of the diligent shall rule shall bear rule the slothful shall be under tribute the slothful man progress twelve twenty seven roast is not that which he took in hunting but the substance of the diligent man is precious in other words if somebody does something after your dating they follow through with it so they get the results of their labor Proverbs thirteen for the soul the slugger desire can have nothing but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat Proverbs twenty one five the boss of the diligent tend only complaint business in Proverbs twenty two twenty nine Cisco man diligent in his business he shall stand before kings shall not stand before mean men notice how the ingredients for home happiness are not prepared for talents and gifts and intelligence as they were only a few homes would be happy but this is something that everybody can have in thorough patient diligence with consistency is necessary for proper child care like races on the key the gentle firm consistent pressure of consistency molds everything in the mold our home and they bring happiness all and have the presence of Christ which brings units in ditches courtesy and deferent and gives a local order and organization in his love for Christ is awakened all whether rich or poor will be eager to learn to manage money war more wisely and time more wisely will have more to bring others to enjoy it we have Jesus the presence of Christ the motivators for consistent thorough patient diligence like it was with us if there's one more ingredient and happiness we look at a portion of this quote there was that European boy who contacted Ellen White to ask about a person with a life and thought might make a good one so Ellen White agreed investigated investigate in a letter written in Europe in eighteen eighty six eighteen eighty six she said this I had reason to think that she just like domestic labor and I knew that you should have a wife that could make you a happy home know if this girl just like domestic labor she could not make a happy home is not optional is essential solid white for the girl she asked the girls should love the smell of the girls of no you can read all the questions she asked in the book letters the young lovers but I want you to notice the question she asked about homemaking skills I asked her if you have any experience in those duties with my home what experience did you have in running a home cooking cleaning but not very romantic partner exciting things the crucial question what is your experience in running a home visit something like the what is your experience in housekeeping is a something you like to put your favorite part what part do you dislike most these are questions that you need to find out an dialogue what is your experience in cooking and baking is this something you enjoy doing is cooking healthy inexpensive what is your experience installing a government dress in your repair close to being interviewed for a job what questions like this I would be asked about my experience in the job which I was applying you want to know the experience and aptitude interests in the past the going job those are the questions that must be answered before marriage for both sides she answered that you done housework at home in her father 's family was somewhat of an incomplete answer it may have suggested more than was true because all my friends and I ask these questions because as her character had been presented to me she needed special education and practical duties of life but have no taste or inclination previously you see this girl needed special Eleazar had an opportunity to observe Rachel Rebecca saw her taking her responsibilities getting water for the house demanding for breaking for cooking or bathing she knew how to work and practical knowledge of running home is needed Deuteronomy one thirteen says this select wise and practical men those known among your drive my only point is your leaders Psalm one twenty eight verse two when using the labor of their hands usually happy and shall dwell with God design work and homes that don't understand the door for another behalf of health reformer five one eighteen seventy seven upon no account should the marriage relation injured upon until the parties fail in female knowledge of the duties of a practical domestic life letters the young lovers vigilantly before assuming the responsibilities involved in marriage young men and young women should have such an experience and practical life as will prepare them for its duties and have a important areas to explore Rome happiness and eight important areas to explore not only another but to explore yourself you know the sort of the Spirit is two-edged sword abandoned it means it cuts the listener but also cuts the speaker as I was studying this I realized when I was here this weekend I would need to make my bed and keep it tidy I found it in my home when things are just about three months ago is trying to think what could I do Sherry take such good care of wonderful life what can I do this to be a thoughtful thing over every morning and make them she always make the offender to stand down with his car as I was thinking these things through the site I realize there areas in my life that I don't come up to the standard him us home thankfully Jesus changes covers as unthinkable for forgiveness for different for all the things that have made it possible for Sherry to be happy living with me though these areas the presence of Christ are trained in supporting underlying unit habitual courtesy deference lahar order and organization wise money management we might say time management to their patient diligent thorough consistency and practical on skills if you carefully investigate these areas prayerfully both in your own life and the one you're thinking you have all the information you need to make a wise wood bulkhead father in heaven is my attempt to speak plainly because plainness must be given you want people have tried to speak for you are just like I would talk to my own children and large you rebuked me as I've studied these things I want to be a husband and father that brings much greater happiness into my home for more carefulness to provide in control what I say and how I say in my tone of voice Curtis I pray Lord that overall the presence of Christ make a witness that we can bring a blessing the Atlas we're so grateful for this time we had to stand studying your word when him so I pray that you will use this plan in some heart saves that will bring a rich harvest for Jesus thank you for hearing and answering prayer Chrysler and

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