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Conquering Addictions: A Personal Testimony

Taariq Patel

Presenter

Taariq Patel has a incredible testimony. As a young child he spent time living in Saudi Arabia, India, and Great Britain. He was heavily trapped in the bondage of drug and alcohol addiction but found that redemptive power of Jesus Christ that restored both his body and mind, to overcome these addictions. Taariq is currently in college studying theology. 

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Recorded

  • August 10, 2013
    11:30 AM
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I said as I counted the highest privilege the highest honor to be here my wife and I been bleeding CPC and I know my lazy and everything I become away from PC and before I began out would like to thank the UIC Southwestern and fascia I want to thank the church members here for your hospitality here warm welcome to pleasure and a privilege you know I was on the plane flying over here and I remembered a couple years ago when I was and I see where God is taking in his places that and things that I'm doing that is on imagine wouldn't have thought about it in a million years are a million different light but when you put your hand in the hand of Jesus you know this morning I was right and out outside the window of beautiful mountains this use mouse was outside the window and was praying among Florida need your help him look at the mountain and I just haul and I said wow the creator of that amount of his God ounce was all we looking at the mouth to keep faith that trusts in the Lord shall boom as Malmö which can be when you got four again you all when I had with me in prayer as the lungs good to come in your own heart as I pray not they together I thought Celestine to small power to say how to create a you give us help us banish evil build this up with you guys strengthen a week when Dennis Miller is to put her mostly in New York Alan and thank you the American and you always good I think the thing what you are doing well and your people you think Jesus will will give thanks unto the Lord for he is good for his mercy and do for that of the Dean of the Lord say so whom he have to redeem from the head nineteen eighty one the sixth of April I was born in Gloucester England my mother is a Jamaican woman my father is Indian and there they met in England and I have a twin brother and unfortunately he's unable to be here we usually give a testimony together but the Lord is gracious and we were all born in England my brother my twin brother and I have a brother that is one year older than my twenty nine Rob landing and an eighty two we came to the United States as I came out when I was about one years old now growing up in my father 's house my father was a devout Muslim and I remember we would call me in my two brothers we would sit there with our legs crossed and our father would sit right in front of us and we would have a little Toby 's on a little and will be rocking back and forth with the Koran open on our last sin our father would sit right in front of is the right like they are never forget where was that big sandal units and big feet to an example right if we messed up on our pronunciation of the Koran one time that sandal as so we learn to read Arabic one we reached the round age of three and four years old reading Arabic any and we were taught to read it correctly proper go to the mosque five times a day especially they just finished having there by the end of the Ramadan right now and during that time of the month will be fasting for about thirty days and will go a lot to the Moscow the mosque to pray all the time you my brothers and we would line up shoulder arm to arm with the brothers in the mosque no separation of the private and average and this is the life I grew up in our limits on my father my mother told me my wife is before you came here she said her used to tell your father I be the best company be it must always was a serious person I still have the series demeanor the Lords help me a lot just and I was serious and I was very devout even when I was seventy years old I was able to memorize chapters and chapters equivalent the college students in the endocrine without able to memorize only chapters of the Koran at such a young age and over a series about Islam growing up in this house this is a solely new my mother who was raised Seventh-day Adventists but when she married my father shoot straight and by the time us three boys came around my father will before we were born wasn't really a practicing Muslim if you will but we came around then he wants to just give this however my mother was digging in her boxes one day she came across a junior book and she pulled it out and it said the desire of ages one of the old books she had in her garage and and she remembers that she would look at her three boys being taught Islam and how we would always get spanked and beat it we got anything wrong or anything was a very strict but loving subtilis that are if we don't make it to heaven that he's been number used to tell us that if we tell a lie the Angel Gabriel given full electric car will put it back in however many lies he told so last vestiges torture so we grew up in this environment my mom said she was the one access when our prayers all day and she this last method for a printable class of billboards and in singing songs of Jesus and and she was going through a conversion experience within the design phases just pick something within our heart and she fell in love with Jesus again she was in a predicament she was married to a Muslim man was raising Muslim children for years now one bottle to work together teaches Christianity at the hospital Bible stories read the Bible to us and I tell you I tell you I tell you when I'm gone up as a Muslim boy but then I stopped reading stories about Daniel and Chelsea and there's a lot of similarities with Islam and Christianity but the love aspect and Christianity was there and he the freedom to pray to God with your own heart emblem on about Jesus it was as a young child my father soon found out what was going on my mother would take us to church on Saturday and he wasn't having they were having serious issues at the house arguing domestic violence you name it it was getting ugly within us with the mouse my mother had chosen to get baptized decided to get baptized and my father said don't even combat she wanted to bring us there in yet a nineties of an Achilles if you get back she woke up that morning she got her clothes ready as if she was in a diaper she decided that she was baptized my father but that will learn this law my mom got baptized my older brother was eight years old at the time so my mother get baptized in his heart was not baptized sooner I know how my father was losing control and he will go to the mosque this is around nineteen eighty nine at the war in Russia and Afghanistan a lot of the soldiers mujahedin are these guys that will go and fight for Afghanistan at the time against rust all these guys will come to the mosque on the time and they would talk to my father my father had a family he wanted to go over there and find a industry hot in August stopping and and these guys atop my father and an annual that he was losing control of his family you're the man you're supposed to assert authority and control as they begins giving suggestions and one guy had a job in the work of Saudi Arabia and he offered my father opposition NASA Google boom the family the Saudi and in Saudi Arabia especially in eighty nine and even now the women have no rights going to this church in Hartford Connecticut time call a church are for Connecticut my sisters were a lot of my family and I they gave us a farewell party my mom was praying and she felt that God was telling her to take the family and go to Saudi Arabia and so in nineteen eighty nine we had a farewell party underneath and the basin of the charts in our member the poster they gave us and then the farewells and we were off to Saudi Arabia at the time I had two of the sisters that were born in Hartford and so it was by kids all five of us my parents flew up the Saudi never forget the plane it was like midnight and I felt like I would also looking down the stairs at the airport I felt like the check engine was like well in on us it was half talked all night wow we got again like Wegmans playing and maybe a cool down the normalized sound you one nine this area July that it was nothing the women at the cover-up when your public when you're in public again walk side-by-side with your husband you will behind her husband admitted menace on Saudi Arabia they have four five whys of all the kids so the man is always in the front with his little tribe in the back and this is the culture and Saudi women soon as you step out on the street at the cover-up can't drive obviously you can watch senior journals whatever you're watching the game watching the show but it is time that saw it during the store it's prayer time they sound this call speakers all throughout the city even on TV that is called Coca-Cola prayer the Oregon and and and and the man was doing the other on you will hear about the speaker when his prayer time they shut the stores dates come down a lap it up even in the malls they have a little section in the mall a little mosque in the mall so they called all the stores and everybody goes into the mosque in the mall and pray I grew up with my father was very strictly we would drive even in America we would drive on the side of the street and he would always have his compass and his run and it didn't matter if it was a thousand people on the street when his prayer time you would find little corner lot his rider 's best days in East was the Mecca and he would pray right there and you have is three boys that behind them playing on the center of the one thing I don't get to the Muslims is that they represent that are afraid to pray infinite by Chris Olympic and I respect that I really respect that during this time Sally my mom had really lost a lot of control and my problem go to work and my mother would still give his violence BC at this time especially eighty nine for hard to sneak any Christian literature into the country without that and I'm not enough take away from her testimony her testimony is beyond powerful not just because he's number God had delivered her so many times was able to sneak a lot of the books through customs some Ellen G White data processing books as well and when my uncle Arthur Maxwell bedtime story books and add on so when my father would go to work me and my brothers and sisters Martha my mother with teachers more stores more about God but a thing is all I was always one of the boys that look out the window and make sure that my father wasn't coming home as soon as we see the call came from the pack him a moment 's national book some of the better web she had a she wrapped him up in the closet he could not catch us or he was going nuts so we will still have these worsens when he would be unworkable at home we weren't escorted the time in an one time though he came to the door and you came to the back way and when he came in the door and saw us in the circle in the middle of the way is I mean it went from the spirit in the room is felt at darkness just came in the room my mom knew that she was good evening to beat down or killed she got ran into the bathroom and lock yourself in we were all jumping on our fathers lest so the know know know he's Dragon at least wanted to down the door be done the door is grabbed all the books all the books that my mom had anything similar what have we not been exhausted so I month now he's gone but she was heartbroken because she had no friends no TV no contact with the family she was not allowed to write letters not allowed to call home restricted access to everything all she had was her Bible and her books and they were taken it have extra Bible to that was not all became shortly to be known afterwards that we went to our father 's job with the network and while we were there at where we notice something very strange we walked into his workplace and we saw all my dad 's coworkers with books in your head and we love and they will all read in my mother 's my father had taken off the books and he had just brought into his job and ultimately please reading all the Smyrna privacy bugs in the councils on Dyson moves everything gone about those books where a woman couldn't bear and so in my arms equipments what pastor my mother 's house essay you need to convert to Islam convert to Islam as she would refuse and that would get the women because women go to other people 's houses you would go and the women will go through the left side it's like different compartments in the house the women will go to one side so they could take off their outer garments and they can be comfortable and the man would always go to the rhino to the other side and so the imams and the other friends of my father would try to get the women convert my mom nothing amongst the firm will so one morning my mother woke up and we worship we had worship on the story of Joseph and as we are blessed on the story of Joseph my father came back afterwards and he says come on guys and then go to the beach just the boys and need to me and both of my brothers is a guy 's got a bring your jackets importance in things like that in the something that is in Saudi Arabia and eleven seconds got what he told us that as we walked in and Adam my twin brother looked at my mom and my mom felt of God feeling so long and and Adam from among the way mom and the door shut without me the last time a mother seen her two little eight -year-old boys toys and have one nine -year-old boy the time for seven months she had no idea where we were seven months my father then took us to the market we got suitcases and supplies and everything and we got on the plane and we should ship docked in the next thing you know my brothers and I would did not displaying and hometown is something about me coming out of planes and experience because when I got on the plane we were assaulted by the smell I mean when they say it does smell is like the greatest trigger your memory man I mean this is not a good because the smell was so strong and so horrible it felt like something it's not like bodies had died mixed with the soon and Emily Garner was horrible for the eight -year-old kid and the country was to sell broken down and the farther we traveled down in Bombay because of the cabinet we were traveling about things now will the media and Western wireless how we soon realized that this is the place the people outside and they would just lock down men women children old young all inside the note 's user they were married women and children will rule with themselves and bleeding for money people our clothes and babies what disfigured and a lot of people are broken physically mentally spiritually all levels it was up more than a culture shock and the conditions they are horrible I mean from the food on the water beasts towels and and monkeys and peacocks and stream slacker zoo and live in their India we stayed in a place a follows intention was the thickest of his boarding school was Islamic boarding school there to learn Islam but the real reason behind it was for him to take us from our mother you see because of why we went in there for seven months in moms were coming to my mother 's house and saying you will not see your children again until you convert to Islam convert to Islam that will tell you what your kids are and everything will be all right but she's the article below and gave up her own kids all remember boys didn't even know they were wearing Indian and my father leaves us as so now horrendous boarding school with people we don't know never seen before while I was there I caught malaria and I remember this guy carrying me through the village about a mile or so deep into the village and our minimizes fading in and out and I was so weak and it just so happened to be ominous is asked the Lord to play this one back because the last Sunderland NEL we had not encountered on that anybody from United States whatsoever but we just happen to be in this boarding school in Northern India and the Balinese and right next to us were these two students one from America and the other guy from Canada we go to speak a language when I got sick one of those guys was approximately out with a fifteen or so pick me up and carried me to that village spousal Ramallah so it is been and there are late on the hospital table would you think what you call a hospital to and the reason why I remember the story so vividly as Kazaa was eight years old and the size of Neil Valen distribute with man now I may have been this big but I was a is so close this day and it was good especially when that thing where they had again like a people to hold me down I was a signal morels waken him I will need testing and stuff with that needle and praise the Lord of the lines we live in conditions where we stayed in the house was made of cow manure and hang out was really cool and in the summer enough we live the most snakes I always had a problem chastened monkeys love to some is to be thousands of them on the rooftop and no voice of not smart boy blue boys are now and what overrides the monkeys they look like that was developed delivered with the Luvox the monkeys in the month is a good thing and sometimes adjacent reservoirs and an those one time the provisional state have you ever written a water buffalo for help you'll hear a yes with that question post it you so was crazy it was his water buffalo change the well and I hopped on the water buffalo oh and my legs were like doing the splits you so very and I have been saying analysis is one of Buffalo is not a riding into the village and all the kids would say Samantha but all the pairs of getting crazy that I like this loan is my fun experiences but also a lot harder we will wave my family are mother and father and we were very thin my my belly was sticking out of all my brothers and we had thousands of lice and I had mosquito bites all over my body my clothes at all bloodstains on and from the bites and scratches and I mean I would take a shower and is public to read by me in the shower would go to the well and this is how we would bathe both love for the majority time we had a well would wake up at six in the morning and we will draw water from the well and we report the water on us and think about it a little bar soap villain is always the wash ourselves in the morning was a bar in the morning is the little girls in the ability we don't want to testify the well in the morning of so have the guys on the circle of the house walk signal to watch the films a hard time you know in India Long story short seven months we were there I experienced a lot of highs and lows over there I see my brothers get beaten front of my eyes and molestation sexual abuse over there and when the loan of praise God that he knows that the and a lot of things when I was a you don't happen to me over there and by the time we got out of there my father had been going through you see in nineteen ninety there was a Gulf War and his job has some financial situations issues and could not support his old anymore and so he had to go himself come get and so get a come get us not only to get a come get us but he couldn't support his family in his own home so we ought to leave the country by the time we got back from India Belmont my brothers and I were so thin how to brush my teeth and now seven months a note there is no hygiene over there you know I used about the musical use the bathroom at the beach before the tide I would receive out there so we just dig a hole use the bathroom and in the title colleges that that was a toilet and also by the time we got back we were pretty banged up to but we got back and is so funny because the last worship we had was on the story it tells the story of a boy who was taken from his family God performed and God was preparing us some even our mother 's prayers to pray for rain and we were able to make she taught us how to pray to my brother and was not here you share that you paid one day mama 's Ukraine when it was hot he tells me the story says he had goosebumps all over his body even though I and he knew that the angel of the Lord 's hand on his shoulder and said Lord 's prayer take us shortly after the vote now let me say something we got Saudi Arabia and what we were Saudi Arabia it was rejoicing taught me about our mother as soon the bombs are going off that bomb alarms in underground bunkers is not itself financial situation the Wally had to get out of the country we got out of the country and we have to go to England why was born my mother 's home country and so while this is the England and while we were there in England not even a month or so I believe is in short I'm just guessing on that but I know my father called my mother and said he everything is back to normal now the job done the Institute finances are good you guys come in my mom a and Lord says whom the Lord has sent me even to be free be not entangled again with that joke about is the procedure as you can go back as she divorced my father at the time and now we were five kids single mother and we were in England now on to say this will quit this is the first time we got to worship it is the first time that we do not look out of the window is the first time but enough to be afraid of getting beat up getting caught up my mom didn't feel the something we could go to church it was case with people our age of the chart family first met my mom 's family baby how this was so much love those soulless different outlook on life State Farm and people gazelles and use the thinnest of me a lot he used to get accustomed to what was going on I didn't feel comfortable around people but I can tell you that a ninety one ninety two ten eleven Arizona had the best time of my life there one of the best time and it was then that I began to learn more about God fall in love with his work as a young kid and I want to share this with you because this is very very special to me they had a children's day in Gloucester England the church and they asked OR pretends to speak and I was one of them and I gave my first sermon of Gloucester church in nineteen ninety one and ninety two and is that his the beautiful part next week my wife and I are flying to England and guess what I'm going to be lost you know and I haven't each other Nelson Emily play the rest of my journey so good he has plans for a few which included his head in your life but if you stray from the low irregular heart gods law is not its protection we were there in England beautiful God has delivered us physically out of bondage and returned us to our mother and after we were in England for about a year and a half to you we then my mom just felt the call to come back to the US of my domicile are the little decisions that are and God had delivered an capable mama is so not my mother was a cold water in the East Coast by herself support piping felt the call to both engines University five kids no money no nothing this is voting Michigan senator 's ears with our five kids and so and God provided a way for us to be at Andrews Park for her to get her degrees so the degree and masters aggrandizing at my stepfather was a pastor passed on or and an American twenty years now praise the Lord while within Michigan we started the Christian school and with marketing expenses while at the public schools there and not a public school you know I was very a solo dry out in like to socialize the people I identify with people nobody knew what I've been through nobody knew my experiences and besides what happened to me how to show our cell and quickly amended out that in American schools are the music and the cool guys and as that of the worship in the word of God I quickly started to take on that nasty needs of the world easily been to the music kind of being at an end and it all started off for me my testimony to citizens of the Christian music I've been being the NCC wine and things like that is that these beings in it and I was captivated with the B is Yahoo open it Islamic homeland in a Christian hall I was not permitted to build things as other people were in the world is suffering means us here in with my version is that you will so can't read them even if it was Christian they captivated eventually I graduated to the real thing I thought it was in the hip-hop and I became so involved in a so that I didn't hip-hop music I started freestyle in rat and selected six centigrade instead of being outside I became inside not only inside the leader of the rebel I was the so-called cool guy school of the tough guy school with hard at the shadow smoking marijuana was addicted to drugs by the time I got in seventh grade and started smoking cigarettes announced fifteen by the time I got out of high school I was a drunk in high mass I was enough to show on Monday for was my music being cool I mean us for that I was a part of the music and in and in and I think about so much because I remember when I was young in those days allows preaching the sermon and I is the tell myself I would never pick up a cigarette I would never smoke I would never do anything but all it took was for me not to occupy my mind of God it took was for me not to be about his compromise Windows that is among you maybe I saw the size of this kind within the next year I added some notes that in the following year and something church what I'm discovering is a Christian is all about momentum it's all about movement if we are not growing in grace your regressing if you look at spiritual life and there is no progress over the years you are Christ's this is about quality and and if I'm not adding and constantly seeking God inconstancy is enormous this is the fight of the year and if were not binding achieving more through God they were falling there is no stagnant middle ground it's either you go on this way of this is that before I knew it I became a drunk high God was not even in my mind didn't think about Sabbath because the more I practice myself and my sin is a sin of the bewitching in a blinding power as well what was once so touching and motivating and moving you can have powerful sermon insurance but if you don't respond to win given again numbness in the fadeaway if you don't apology as in a fadeaway hearkening to us but if you don't I will send you one of and this man or women shall be blessed in his investment senior year with an army going to military and their great time to basic training and I've been this cockiness and me so build with pride everything I've seen thy compilation was nothing I couldn't do and I went to the military I want the basic trainer for banning someone around the US and in and out I went to a wahoo Monday in Hawaii and our space analysis problems among my brother so you know what it's funny because while he was going to his being a little too myopic to have might've seen him while I was in way that the blessings see my brother region for the Lord God is good and I was there in Hawaii at Schofield barracks at the hospital there and while I was there I became a drunk I just intoxicated myself just live day in and day out you know the pothead at first I can smoke weed and army is in the last new system buddies a month or so so I began to experiment with other drugs with methamphetamine cocaine and acid in an you name it LSD must not go along the whole list of them all and get to be this ranted animal I would wake up in the morning of the blood on my wall and I would not remember what happened the night I will wake up in the bushes sure that the phenomena where I have got to get back to the Bears got to get back how was a mess this can lead that God had blessed my mind with a memory that memorize chapters and chapters couldn't recollect what happened in need and you know what ten years of my life is blank it was the same people would tell me what I'd be analysis to myself the thing is that the stormy was my pride because I went up in the morning while a party on my four o'clock in the morning is still one three four miles because I was so young and I felt like I was invincible and nothing can stop me while circles around everybody else he wasn't drinking and smoking crystal meth and about Stalinism on coming back and I could at least with my windpipe and Shane when you are his guffaws unsuitable about the military and now had but all these demons with me on and say something once once I open those doors to these places now now I don't know if there's some somebody in here smoking a cigarette smoking we but I'm here to tell you today I have not met and added anybody who does any harder drugs so to speak who has not started out smoking we talk to Sony people all crack amphetamines cocaine you name it Bosstones local stubbornness would be six the thing is once you start opening these doors these avenues and beatnik being accessed particular mind and your body to a place where it should not go should this warfare is supernatural and you're stepping on Satan Squire Lucifer who was the most powerful angel that was created next to God was Lucifer God was Lucifer highest in power wisdom and glory the seven of the Lord says that a brightness that shone brighter than any of the other angels he is these so I brought these things with me I was still diluted in my mind blinded at the sin and I was destroying my cell on all levels now you see my body was able to call but slowly out of destroying myself and then I got of the cocaine was on cocaine use an identical while the drug episode here but I'm in a part of the because then I got hooked on to OxyContin these synthetic opiate painkillers unlike arrowhead just explained with the dopamine release thing I began to think these narcotic pain meds anything in this medications a cancer patient wanted definitely less severe broken bones and they give it to them for sure I highly addicted my brother and I were taken the highest adults sniffing these pills smoking I know it's Robinson 's raw raw but God is the Savior Austin it doesn't matter how healthy you are is an expert at saving the pseudocode that had as your dirty no way to be clean as they know the Bible says his name shall be called Jesus why save his people he is here because these things to focus on when he was here he hung around send still stuck I got to the point where the jobs leave my system and I will shake my bones be heard in his hundred degrees outside a cold sweat it have to put on a hoodie and a beanie and my body is broken it got to the point where without the drive I couldn't even stand up and go wash and bitch couldn't talk to people my personality my character the strength of my very life was in that bill we see that good feeling Carlos talking about is when dopamine goes off into your reset dopamine receptor good feeling my body was taken so much opiates that it was producing a map the amount of dopamine as a my body in order to compensate all this made a whole bunch more respect as my body can be produced and when I'm synthetically or putting in for it substituting now when I don't have to drive out a bunch of empty receptors we made some feminist sadists you are sure this remember I never understood how truly complex the human body is until I missed until I messed with my body I felt so empty and shaking and destroy I would welcome out of town for three years out on this hose on my shoes and drooling on myself and and him squeak my foot we try to get at here is probably an army invincible man who provide around anybody do anything you want now he is dragging his feet downtown Julie my brother was with an we got to the point where he had two daughters who has two daughters is more now and out my mother called us by the said Adam those two girls are not going to church and animal take care the kids and unfortunately the kid will be around this a lot analyst say to my apartment and I had the Brokaw but it was working still in my mom says I want you to drive those kids off at my place on Friday night so I could think of the church onset is and is not doing his and so I had the car has to take Adam and I take my two nieces who go to mama Southwood Drive on Friday and jump up the kids but would you have them in one half Friday night my person just started up this Friday night via the add our walk in there ha ha to my mind and I'll walked in the kitchen always try to give foodstuff for my mom 's place and adopted kids opted an end of their people and are worshiping and praying for those people my age talking about all the mode is good quality men's years out eyes and people start to talk about the stories in the Bible and my dear I like that are not began to glow like this is a three and a half years my brother and I tried to quit myself in the clinics in China Turkey and restless couldn't sleep for we can always count methadone clinics and name it we went every included quick so when I heard the word of God I didn't believe it but inside me I hope because I wasn't fully aware of my condition but on new homes destroyed I knew a conflict without an deep within my heart was desperate for change so I would drop off the kids have decided and before you know it is not as certain the very high sit there in the background high this into the bowels and I started hearing the same stories and Johnson a foot this time this time it meant a lot more to me why because I was hoping that what they were believing in this show because I was desperate if I did this alternate I have friends who are within drugs with the next day I would go across the mountain boys house big day RIP on the try someone else all the CNS when now you soon enough Galvan people are dying around me doing the same thing on that my brother had a conversion experience and he stayed in my and what I seen him do on God blew my mind is so see a way of trying to quit so many times how and someone I was looking for some five minutes of it he won't my apartment to agency of the eye broken bones burn my body but the worst pain I've ever experienced I can take constantly shaking my nerves a little crazy and slight changes are and when I see my brother do to hold excruciating that is viable and has had the guts the point is I got so there you couldn't reason he's whispering songs in public song another without his testimony that he would quote after two should he still felt at that but he showed he got over the main car park by himself I was astonished because I said my whole life I was always happens when and when he did I do I'm integrated quick between a happy and not to the point where I was civil to these Bible studies ACL is out of work I was on workers comp disability for about a year and a half and a time to come all that is run out I had a hard physical labor job and now I have to report back to work and my job situation my manager Plant manager agent I hatched right with the job I've always argued with the HR manager was always a problem that was such a bit miserable person I like working there waited for them to slip up at a lawsuit against the company and now want to go back into this place back into the back into the space into the lines I did once the lines these were my mind and an I did something very strange I never did a lot I decided to write Sunday night Sunday night and I remember I got on my knees on the side of my said Lorna clinical work Monday morning acid these people can fire me is now talking woke up the stairs without the most expensive and not a lot of pick up fifty pound buckets of pain and boxes now I'm not I mean and I said Lord I'm not in the making I said God my mom is that some of you to go to rehab and I said you know what God and I began to plot my are you anyway I was the God how he was in their view why all this stuff had to happen in my life and in the warmhearted God and I'm getting mad at God and there were in a series of coming out of the last time I cried last them a kind of like uncle died in ninety six and all of a sudden tears coming out of my eyes and I am planning on announcing the bottom sorry I'm sorry for messing up inside not choosing made in the if you can get a list and can be read my Bible and pray everything we do my apartment my cardinal Monday morning I went away still drugged up shake and I step there one of those seem like my enemies I know that I have a meeting with the HR manager Plant manager warehouse manager had been to work in over a year and a hassle than ever refresher meeting if you will and before I sat down and talk to the HR manager her name is Jennifer and I said Jennifer Gossett shortly after we went to office she closed the door and is the hardest thing for my proud part even though I was drooling on myself I still had cry and I sat there she pulled up a chair of economy she said what's going on I said Jennifer addiction addicted to this drug on these that you know the office time to think and this got been no consistent now he's addicted now what's going on she looked at me as you said to the club cards for you to say that both are great looking to speak the process we go to be thought out and I went in the other Roman I had to call on the phone and talk to this guy that got with my job to get me to go to me that so as I'm on the phone am trumpeted as Guyanese gold prices in a gambling is going on is what I pray for I hang up the phone I go back to Jennifer 's as she looks at me as she says see while you were in pain she said she was to do with God Justin is simple as she began to share with you of the Holy Spirit is one case you know that I said to him she started giving testimony at the testimony about her life was reading Galatians and Ephesians at work she apologized me I did anything to you and I apologize her of your hygiene and by the time I left that place I thought I was in a dream missing I pray for God to deliver me but I even I didn't expect that within a ready Scripture assist the sacrifices to the Lord our contrite spirit and a broken old Lord and I realized that my heart was broken and I had is a receipt of billions of prayers going up when you have a contrite and humble broken art classes at the West is crying I hear I hear he that inhabited its currency dwells out of their you know what I had been homeless so nobody could help me with that day I never felt so special God to stop the sun in the work of this patent just talk dirty old guiltily walking on the street can control himself he will have their man in the side of the Golden ale is so cool so crazy to me that I made a deal lesson but I promise out trained me to be down there only promises us that is a drug addict amen I'll pay you back a a God honored my week broken a went to be had on the way to be my twin brother was there company me and he gave me the scripture in the back of his property sentimental and in the description he told me to give it to you Matt is that Psalms one forty three and was little piece of paper and I took it as well don't read that Scripture until you need a tennis court 's time pulled that one out and I my pocket him I was on the places goldens we had a so I'm in the car and I'm never asking me to two punch acquaintance asking the meaning of the song playing in the car and if the sun was going to use us Jesus she's out of the meetings she will then rank in Ukraine and thumbnail we had sat there like that first night my mom and given me this lesson book the quarterly on Monday two thousand eleven January was in St. Helena Hospital and the first lesson in the quarterly the end of table contents that a chapter on addiction I like men are men really common that the money go to page eighty one also I go to page eighty eight on addictions and the first Scripture Iraq was John eight thirty six and it's set in the son therefore shall make you you shall be free peers to support BC when you been in bondage for so many years you've tried everything and it hasn't you that this and you read a Scripture about we about freedom when you've been paying all your life emotionally and still Jonathan you need about freedom that Scripture needs every whole heart and soul is bank owned Citgo this is exactly what I've been crying out for Michael each day and have a Bible study though convicted as amazing because all it took was like one verse of this so it wouldn't install have you believe that Jews and beyond okay I would have to close I can't lord and just to have the micelle Ms. Russell is a New York Times and rest your promissory something I've been looking for my whole life has been right in front of me the whole time when so so I got to the point within the first analysis could now everywhere our way was walking with my Bible of finding Mountain Jews unlike wow Jesus died as subcultural domiciliary visit to any way should admit everything I Nana got one when I was in rehab for the people would look at me and be like that Google is about to some of the year to talk about right I walked with his battle plan is bland and they shall walk to the Lord and I'm just eaten the whole Bible not never met so much of my life didn't know how to navigate the word of God was guiding the inscription was sharp and heavy bombs on who gets a knock on my door eighteen if you can keep peace on how to read the Bible from can continue to spread revival is manning the Gulf and the other young lady name along the company and see I'm having problems with Mark when my father can you can teach me how to pray I see that you praise that can teach me how to pray one of the alumni guys who would give us advice came to me instead brother is something about you man he says you are blowing up never seen nobody can be helpful for the manager of the place that I wanted to interview in a conversation with you because there's something special about you another counselor talk to me is that I am still smoking awards Suboxone medication outweigh the law withdraws and you can tell me I'm blowing on special and everybody's asking me for advice it got to the point where people were not on my door people make an appointment for all and I shut the door and more on on behalf our team and help myself I'm going to help on these people on the mathematics treatment being of a God told me by helping them burn out after Bible Proverbs chapter eleven him Proverbs will wrap another subject I was eleven and we had my Lord and our Lord was given me the basic training on Christianity one oh one in rehab center level we then look at verse twenty fourth you were with me the Bible says there is that scattering and yet what anyone increases and areas that withhold is more than is meet but it tended the poverty the liberal soul shall be made what facts and he that want to it shall be watered also himself as the Bible says there is that scaffold you give it out before I go see and you get the increase but there is those that withhold what they got and it tends the property know God is given is true a man and is a responsibility production mold in which it tends with the liberal soul shall be made what anyone that and he do that want to shut also socially water also so the province of the province will you do then going to try it out has been out steepest through some of us need to be water some of us are dry the Bible is given as a guaranteed ticket to the bank how to get how to get one or someone else you will scratch to people .com even and by the time I got out of there out there who will set the school downstairs and I would go there by myself and by the time I was done almost half the people fifty plus people without there is with me at this at this Bible study is and what my conversion I was questioning God about the saddest Allen Wyatt and God was showing me step-by-step is true I didn't get the memo Jesus Jesus and I said I wouldn't accept nothing less show is the sound of your true colors look at Newport outside the house will sell both now talking a lot every day but the second floor and smoking a cigarette and all of a sudden I hear singing by this chart as Solomon sounds good my mom saved the money in the minds of sickness smoking this is a dismaying and I'm like wow this is graded and then all of a sudden I open the Bible to the Scripture Logan is that about Jesus as it was his custom to go to the synagogue on the Sabbath day chances of that me talking about the snapping and Jesus kept the Sabbath and around amusing smoking despite satisfying online my more convincing speaking everything economy had about a rehab Québec broke apartment but I still have much cause about the shutdown was still in I was brought by the get event archiver and I was praying us okay Lord Lieutenant Meg meets Tuesday she's good my five uneasy not Lord I had the money to disability and is that alternate take two other weeks of maintenance Bible study on child and unlike man I think I got about Joan God and our meeting is going on beside the call this lady can someone hold for thirty minutes reading about Joe and all of a sudden this guy comes on the phone so now this is only a matter of this calling on even one okay limited information visit okay Mister Patel is says on all yeah you got to just compass and what do exactly just been prostatectomy can count you got on your card right now is a guy once at four thirty five hundred and the other one for twenty five hundred men all nested I never had a Muslim life never in my life is Camano got a money order so fast must of been worth it the fact that money will why don't time Mister Lee said I was just about the market name when I got out this route was doing gotten of the team will go door-to-door pretty much every week last week shared my testimony first time I sent my test my also host afraid I was actually in the rehab place and it had to dim the lights and when nobody's looking at the couldn't speak analysis goals like mandolin guitar and the White Sox I pray that it binds to said work and give them a mom put me on the spot of Bible study ousted in the back Arthur came back and she said to the front and she got sure my dad he usually leaves out they got the job had me sit in front and everyone looking like the only people know that I will do an I just finished this into the cerebral spasms called slaves no more so the first thing I said is sleep no more empathetic and in the Lord have included testimony when did net is that church by me sharing share and not God has me my dad legs and learn how to preach and whatnot and economic this team call Chrysler among operation CFO and we've him receiving the sacrament and Sullivan one and coming to be in the service of God could be one of the lowliest directors owners are and to be promoted to the highest service and my mother my prayer for all of the understand understand that God has called us all Ephesians two ten says that God has ordained as he is appointed as all the good work therefore seeing we have this ministry as we have received mercy we think but have renounced the hidden things of dishonesty not walking in craftiness nor handling the word of God distinctly but by manifestation of the truth to be man's conscience in this is the responsibility of all give thanks of the Lord for he is good for his mice and to close out two more stories I was in rehab and I was late to this class and I got into the classroom and and the cheese was speaking as so those two I was in the class and I got the Bible take note friend there when the class is over I walked out to put the Bible back in the classroom and I noticed my friend there is broken down tears he was crying he was an asset was going on reasonable withdrawals like the snake bite in the back of my head he was taken all common things and it was hard I suppose one of walkmans for the wall is only one side of the hospital doubts of this trail would this create was whining is not because the schools in what manner were taken as walking he starts crying he felt about his kids his life and I filled his brother because I'm going to the same result object conducts you unlike now I know Menendez the two dudes crying together on a romantic stroll down the creative I was unable to hold onto the boat but with client and was heard my heart sympathized with him and we got to the end of the Creek were sitting on the rocks and Derek sat down on the rock and when you sat down and he attended Bible on that role with and it opened up the book of song and read that Scripture that my brother gave me Psalms one forty three subcultures so what we do not and he tried to Psalms one forty three through my prayer own give ear to my supplication in thy faithfulness answer and environs at Ensenada the judgment with I said for thy sight shall no man living for the enemy have persecuted my soul he had seen in my life down to the ground it made me to dwell in darkness as those that have been long day there was my spirit overwhelmed within me my heart within me is this I remember the days of old I meditate on all thy works news on the work of the hands I stretch forth my hands unto the my sole source of Bethany is a thirsty land fairly speedily although it must be expended on you I me lest I be like unto them that go down into the pit called me to hear that lovingkindness in the morning when the caused me to know the way wherein I should force myself deliver me oh Lord for minor league into the kitchen do not know for thou art my God my spirit is meeting me into the well Guglielmo for thy namesake for thy righteousness not by Marcy cut up my enemies and destroy all of them benefit once enclosed sheds I remember when I was going through withdrawal had been going to the Bible studies of the time in I was sitting on the couch and I was angry because nobody can feel the pain that I was going I was shaking a cold sweat and the TV was on it I was so a TV with no blurring and now I had antenna but the channels barely big enough but faintly I can see this creature guy preaching on I was able to hear clearly and in the screen shots was showing Jesus on this poll and he was getting wit and certain aromatic as nobody knows what I'm going to the pain I'm feeling and listening to this project because until the store he says that he was at the hospital the going console his mother would just lost her stepson our child and egregious satin of Rome and he was trying to know what to say she had just lost a child is asked to get out of here I will need to a near the company what does God know about losing a and she was consumed no passive insane machine Sydney on the couch listening to this company was not know about all was enormous is to start say no there is not a single thing of the expense that he has one of talk about the less emotional pain is mental strain and agony villas on a physical pain separation loneliness this man Gabriel is all on one page took on us upon initial stroke within my heart as I saw Jesus on his cross on the screen you see because in that moment I've been something special when you know that someone has been through what you are the sort of connection you have with someone when you know they have been all went when she went to bed experience which of the spirit you don't have to say a word and there's a certain connection in that moment on the couch holding because areas ask me I asked the nurse let the redeemed of the Lord studies will be happy on the head and gathered them out of the lands of the peace from the north they wandered in the wilderness and the solitary way they found no city to dwell hungry and thirsty their soul think of it then they cried to the Lord in their trouble and he delivered them out of their distress and he let them forth by the right way that they might go to a city of habitation oh that men would praise the Lord for his goodness and for his wonderful works to the children you satisfy the longing soul in the old such as sit in darkness and in the shadow of death being broken by fiction and not then they climbed on the board and he saved us he brought them out of darkness shadow of death and break them since oh that men would praise the Lord for his goodness and for his wonderful works to the children of men we have broken the gates of grass and cut the bars of iron in Sunday school because of the transgression egos of their iniquities are afflicted and the soul of forth all manner of me and they draw near to the gates of the then they cried to the Lord in their trouble and he's saying that them out of their distresses he sent his word and healed and delivered from the ode that men would praise the Lord for his children had to I my father when I think you will I want to thank you for your mighty hand that delivers savings I want to thank you God for hearing the cry of the present the Bible says the Lord looses prison I thank you God that what we think were alone in their lonely cry out if you and ever ready to say how I'm not only help but empower and deliver to give us a purpose in life and now Lord you have given me a beautiful wife I'm now in college and PC studying theology web before Lord I was on the street dragging my only through the power of cheese I want to thank you my Savior for saving me I want to thank you Lord for showing the people about I want to thank you Lord that you died for us on Calvary on all the pains of the work so that you could bring this up on a naked appeal wanting to appeals with their son in this church today Lebanon the bondage of affliction soon in your life and today the Lord has spoken to your heart that there is freedom there was prosperous success in his word there was that there was a difference in a better life for you the best he has died for you you are the most expensive being in this new God 's blood was spilled the double doesn't want to know what you know your value there is people in here will need to be delivered in all the Bible says this is my hat is short and all that I cannot redeem my no power to deliver behold at my review I tried this I represent what Weldon is before the day was I I am the first I am also the if you want to be delivered whatever Satan has a grip on your life and you want give your life to the Savior you want to submit to Jesus and I would ask you to stand right standards his father to his arms he is waiting praise the Lord hallelujah stand if you want to be delivered you want to try Jesus is the only one that promises freedom and it sticks to his work because if I sent you a you will be free indeed start the Jeep when asked those people be more in the side of heaven today when asked if you want maybe you you never given your life to the Lord and you want to give your life to the Lord this day you want to commit to God this day and I want to say special prayer for you I want to say special prayer for you and if you want to be baptized or rebaptized in him and asked to come to an prime in the side of heaven he will not feel human ethanol is something about stepping out in faith Honolulu there's something about coming up here in the side of having in the side of heaven you know the Bible says that all the angels rejoice when they see he walked under Gabriel Estrella not his heart Jesus is shouting for joy for his children you are so valuable outside he died in agony I was you not believe you your condition to bring you up the sons and is God and daughters of God is so his glory and praise the bottom world would you give your life to Jesus today come to the front the vibrators alone how do you alternately the devil will not have a grip on your life anymore he will not have a grid Jesus has bought your soul any as long as they are he has given you power to be victorious power to overcome the Bible says he got overcome it that Satan shall inherit all things and I will be his God and he shall be my son to him that overcoming the same shall be called in white raiment for they are worthy to walk with me Jesus like the spot of people underside and I promise you will never fail you he promises that my church he says when my spirit is there is liberty there was freedom all you need to know weary and heavy rain come to me and I will give you take my yoke upon you for my burden is light disease and you shall find rest unto your souls he says these things I've spoken that you letting me for end as well you will have tribulation but be of good cheer Jesus has overcome the world and he wants to overcome that Satan is voting your life just let him is there anyone else anybody else wants the common view your life to the captain of the host the little commander I bring you what the someone else these the stand for God all of the status of Jesus I can tell you today I was on the street driving my feet and now operates in the is only because I cried to God that day and he saved me inconsistencies became provided anything but me and I just want to tell you guys of his nobody said would love to me like a silk purse with you here today spirit is coming to consult please come to live a day to waste eleven crime no time to bother with this well there was no peace out here God says I will keep it with a piece if you keep your mind on the visas great peace have they that love my law is anyone else anyone God is in the business of saying I get some of these one more appeal bells who want to commit your life to God I knew today spent with me please if you wanted to commit your life manual against a Lord I want to walk as you walk I want to share with you done for me in my life I want to have a closer walk with you I want to be a better Christian Lord I want to stand on the premises to see victory in my life I spent in the Latin church and ask assault in the open we do that we kneel together communion together thank you hallelujah my father our father our God by your spirit saith the Lord of Lord you are the whole of mankind back on this bonus plan of Lord knowing the pain of loneliness is disparate and Ms. Amanda Bennett has God the father words is Glavine on the handling of government right now deliver us from ourselves Bob help us Lord to see the light of the old learned that there is power is in the one God power to do whatever you set your rebuke you could try to see how my no power to deliver you ask but I want to thank you for your mercies that endure I want to thank you for striving for so long are those stood and walked down the aisle and there are those who got out of his seat and nursing field God I have given my life to you sees us I am falling into the arms think needful take me changed my life so need coordinator spirit surroundings may have practiced comfort may they find the power in your word that is there that will not return unto me void have you not set it in so shall it be withdrawn all things are possible to him that the need to increase their thank my God give them the whole which is in Christ Jesus on Florida paper your spirit is especially unreasonable I pray Lord that your spirit would not leave them between his face and that the decision that they made to stand up here today that your screen would demonstrate God to follow through the singular word for strength Lord the billed amount of Satan in the name you know how that has overcome the world I thank you nor in those the rest of us that have stood Lord who wants to get rid of these habits these strongholds in our life in the name of Jesus Lord relating to match her speed we claim the promises nor we spat on your word and it will be free in Jesus Lord and that we will walk in a determined not to go back with means to be Lord I thank you for your policy thank you for your word that tells us to take hold of your strength I thank you Lord we you have perfect and normal all week but Holly Lelia that your are not deliver these people through the power of your Word in order that it not be lost on us that we must share the children looked on and I live so that we can be watered are so over the solo does the deepest things go this thank you Lord for coming down here in Sabin Russell thank you Lord for Karen about us generation thank you Lord for banding abandoning your throne perhaps the name of Jesus we bless your name on her as I was to Dobbs worth reading sermon audio and much more than he would like to know more about our universe the more so than please visit www. .com universe .org

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