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Advent HOPE Sabbath School

The God-Arranged and Blessed Marriage

Dan Augsburger

The God-Arranged Match

I'd like to read a word of scripture before Rose and I pray together from Isaiah 55, 8 and 9.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord.

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

And verse 11, so shall my word be that goes forth from my mouth.

It shall not return to me void, but it shall accomplish what I please.

It shall prosper in the thing for which I sent it.

Father in heaven, rose kneel before you this evening out of our awareness that Unless you're present and blessing, much time will have been wasted.

Lord, you know the plans you have this evening, and I just wanna ask that your spirit will move freely among us.

I really believe that it's for such a time as this you have a message for at least somebody here tonight.

And I pray that every person will receive your message for them.

It's a privilege to be here this evening.

I've heard much about Advent Hope, and you play, I think, quite a ministry from right here at Loma Linda to all the rest of us in the rest of the country.

And I'm not here to suggest that we have any secrets in and of ourselves.

We're just going to share what God seems to have done in our own experience that is quite instructive.

And then look at what the scripture says on the same subject.

And then share some other things that we feel will be helpful.

And so in terms of the schedule, and you notice the title, finding God's needle in God's haystack.

For those of you that are single and looking, would you like to believe that God can find you that person who is truly suited to whatever you've been called to?

And that you'd have a really good marriage.

I think good marriages should be the rule, not the exception in the Adventist church.

Now, I will freely confess, I've been married and it didn't work out.

That's not a negative, that's not throwing stone, not dispersions.

But the second time around, I literally remember meeting 2 students of mine.

And I said, I'm getting married in August.

And I responded and said, actually, I just found out myself.

I know that seems surreal, crazy, and it is.

And I do not necessarily recommend what happened for us as the norm for anyone else.

But we're going to show you some substance to help you understand how I can make that kind of statement.

But what I will tell you is we've had an amazing marriage.

And God was merciful to me in that Dan was clueless most of the time.

So this evening we want to talk about finding God's needle in God's haystack, because you do not know who is that needle, nor do you necessarily know where to find that individual.

You're looking for the person that God has prepared for you.

God knows who that person is and where you will find that person.

Many in seeking to find something on their own, discover later they really needed God's wisdom instead of their own because from the hour of marriage, many date their success or failure.

But marriage is that strange thing which is either the best or the worst.

And if you're not going to be happily married, trust me, you'd rather be single.

So, tonight we're talking about finding God's needle and God's haystack.

Sabbath morning, it's a study from the Bible on guidance.

Let her be the 1 from the story of Eliezer searching for a wife for Isaac.

And finally, principles for a God-blessed marriage.

And I don't know if you realize how much Ellen White speaks of principles.

If you look in her writings, there's around 19, 000 quotations where she speaks of principles.

And she makes a statement that is dramatic, where she says, men scheme, but God plants a principle.

I don't know if you understand the profundity of that, but but we scheme we devise But God plans certain principles, and if we follow his principles we will succeed So we're talking about the God arranged marriage look at the Bible the spirit of prophecy We have a handout that I believe has been handed out to you folks or will be That's for you to study in your own and then we have a website called the cybel heart And there is a QR code Which I will show you right there, And you can take a picture of that because there are more resources there that would be very helpful.

And so we want to talk about finding God's needle in a haystack.

And just to give you some background, Rose was a Bible worker before, living 14 hours away from me, and I had a ministry that took me many places, and I didn't think anyone would want to marry me with what I did.

So there's the verse, but here's the statement that we want you to think about as well.

Marriage is something that will influence and affect your life both in this world and in the world to come.

A sincere Christian will not advance his plan in this direction without the knowledge that God approves his course.

You will not want to advance your plans without knowing that God approves your course.

He will not want to choose for himself or herself, but will feel that God must choose for him or her.

You know, there are some things we're willing to let God make a choice on, but when it comes to that, most of us say, hold on, hold on.

And it's a really big question, to what degree do you trust God?

I suspect that in some areas of our lives we don't really trust him very much.

And so tonight, we're going to challenge you.

She says, we are not to please ourselves for Christ pleased not himself.

I would not be understood to mean that anyone is to marry 1 whom he does not love, this would be sin, but fancy and the emotional nature must not be allowed to lead on to ruin.

God requires the whole heart, the supreme affections.

So I won't say any more than that tonight.

I was gonna share a story about some missionaries of South Africa, But I think I will turn the time over to Rose.

But if you wonder if God can intervene in specific, mind-boggling ways, you're going to hear a story tonight that you will never forget.

And I hope you have the courage to say, God, I've been looking.

Let Her Be the One

I have to be honest with you, I didn't expect to ever come here.

You know, this is a place well known and doing a ministry all over the world and for which we are very grateful.

And I don't think I would be here unless the Lord wanted me to be here.

For some reason someone put it on someone's heart and I think the Lord was behind that.

And so I want to kneel and offer a word of prayer that everything I say will be what God wants me to say.

But we truly need the Lord, otherwise we will have wasted a lot of time this morning.

Father in heaven, this weekend we've been asked to, we opted to speak on relationships.

We could have spoken on other things, but Lord, you know that from the hour of marriage, Mrs.

White says that for many it is the beginning of their either success or their failure in life.

And it's such a serious, serious decision that we won't want to choose.

Father, this morning it is my task to try and look at this subject from the Bible.

But without the presence and the help of the Holy Spirit, they won't gain what you want them to gain.

And so please forgive us, Lord, of everything that might hinder the presence of the Holy Spirit.

Take over our minds, take over my tongue.

Might I be your representative and your spokesman nothing more nothing less nothing else for Jesus sake and thank you Lord in advance in Jesus name I pray amen I'm here this morning because God did an amazing work in my life in the area of marriage.

You know what I'm referring to Been married twice the first time Came to an end sadly It's a life-changing experience as some of you know It can destroy you or it can help you.

In my case, the Lord, this is honestly true, the Lord brought a healing in my life that I would have never expected.

Now I can tell you that part of what Rose did not talk about last evening is how both of us experienced a profound healing that most people would say you never recover from.

In a moment, we walked away from our past.

And we shared a little bit with another person and she said be sure and mention that so we'll talk about that more later this afternoon in appropriate ways.

But God is still in the business of doing miracles.

And back in 1998 both Rose and I came back to Andrews.

My dad taught at Andrews over the course of 60 years, literally from 1942 to 2002.

And a brother here who speaks the language of heaven, le français, on doit le parler, j'espère qu'on va l'employer au ciel un jour.

I just told him in our language that someday we may speak French up in heaven, we should all learn now to be able to speak it there.

But anyway, in 1998, we both came back to Andrews.

And within 2 years, Rose had the very distinct impression, literally, I'm going to marry you someday.

But we did marry, And as you heard last night, God was working a way that you could not make up.

Okay, this was something that was truly of God and I would urge you to listen to the story if you weren't here last night.

And it's interesting when they tested our compatibility, you know, the Preparing in Religion, some of you know that instrument, It looks at your differences and your and your similarities.

We'd only spent 7 hours in person when we really got serious, you know, to the point of talking marriage.

And her mom, Green, when they did that test we answered 83 to 86 percent of the questions identically and they said you know we've never seen scores so high it's because truly I believe it was a God arranged marriage but God also wants to have a God bless marriage and and Just as 90% of overcoming temptation is avoiding temptation, did you hear me?

90% of overcoming temptation is avoiding temptation.

Much of what makes a good marriage is choosing the right person, and we talked about last night, looking for God's needle in God's haystack.

And I suggested that we don't know what that needle looks like.

And then eventually I realized that God was doing something profound.

And in the mercy to me, God allowed me to be naive and ignorant of what was going on during those many years.

But anyway, we finally did get married and we've enjoyed really a wonderful, wonderful marriage.

I can tell you that there's something better than being single and something worse than single, and that's being married.

If it's with the right person, nothing can compare to it, because you're with your best friend all day and all night.

You don't have to go on a date, you don't have to go to a restaurant, you have a date every day and all the day if you want, And it should be that way.

Why not have a marriage that you look forward to coming home?

Frankly, if you could, you'd stay home all day.

I call her, you know, you speak of My better half, that's sometimes a pejorative term.

Men sometimes speak and say, there's my better half at home.

No, I call her my better equal because she is my equal in every sense of the word.

And she knows that I love her and I believe with all my heart that what comes out of our mouth affects what's in our hearts.

And so we need to, you know, if you have a garden and you want plants, what do you do?

You cover it up with black plastic, right?

And you sneak pesticide underneath all the time, right?

No, you open it to the sunshine, you weed it, you give it good nutrients, and if you want a good marriage, you praise your wife, you love your wife, you do things with your wife, you do stuff for your husband.

And that's where a good marriage comes from, not by criticizing and trying to remake their lives.

Because we've all been made with an individuality, an identity that is ours and belongs to God.

And no 1 has a right to try and change that.

And so the great challenge in marriage, which is what we'll talk about this afternoon, is how do you blend 2 different individuals?

And that's called the work of a lifetime.

When you get married, you enter into a school that you never really get out of, right?

But it becomes wonderful to see how God can bring you together.

You know, when you've prepared and then suddenly someone comes along and says, well, actually I'm going to change all of that, and you kind of take a deep breath and say, well, I guess she's the woman, she has the right to do that.

And eventually you come to so respect that sure, sure.

And so we'd like to suggest this afternoon that marriage is amazing.

I know that there's some people who are not convinced that they want marriage because there's so many examples of bad marriages or poor marriages or less than ideal marriages.

But I want to tell you that I believe good marriages, happy marriages, productive marriages should be the rule, not the exception, because Ellen White also says that the strongest witness, bar none, stronger than anything your pastor might say is a happy family.

And so it's not something you're going to experience by running to this church or that church, and I just need to find a nice person.

I can't find in my own church, so I'll go to the Baptist church down the road.

No, it's where you look for God's needle in God's haystack.

You don't know what the needle looks like, and you don't know where the haystack is, but God knows both.

Principles of the God-Blessed Marriage

It's been wonderful to be here with all of you.

From the feedback we're getting, it sounds like it's touched some of you pretty close to home.

This is a really important area, But I want to say strongly that God is a miracle worker, and he can do great things in any marriage, any situation.

So don't give up, but try to make good choices as much as you can.

And truly, just as victory is not a behavior, it's a person whose presence in my life changes my behavior.

I mean, victory is more than anything else.

The presence of Jesus in my life, it changes my outward behavior.

So a good marriage has to do with the presence of Jesus.

And we're going to talk about it together.

She does extremely well most of the time.

And Rose, why don't you have the opening prayer for us?

I know Josie asked me, but why don't you?

Heavenly Father, thank you so much that we can be here.

We just really want you to do your work among us today.

And so I just ask that you would lead and bless.

And Lord, sometimes the speakers may be sharing something, but you have your own sermon for the heart.

And so I pray that that's what will ultimately take place.

Thank you, by the way, for what you've shared with us.

You've given us taking care of in terms of arrangement.

It's been a blessing for which we are most grateful.

You take good care of people, so whoever makes it possible, please accept our sincere gratitude.

Anyway, the fact that we're here this weekend is a bit of a miracle.

I was supposed to come here a few weeks ago.

And on our way home from actually having been down at 3 ABN pumping gas, I kind of decided to stay out of snow and did a head plunge and landed on my wrist.

And I thought both of my wrists were broken.

And that evening, Josie says, would you consider coming later?

And I'd already been thinking about traveling with suitcases and a little 1 with splints on my arms.

And I'm glad that we have a God that actually, you know, it says, before they call, they will answer while they're yet speaking out here.

And we've been talking about relationships.

And so we want to talk, first of all, about the realities of coming into marriage.

But before we do, Rose, I'm going to share a story about the Coyerth if I can.

Also, let me just make a mention, I have a website, DiscipleHeart.com, it has more than 800 pages of resources.

There's a section on the Christian family, and you'll find articles on raising children, Christian marriages, seeking a partnership, those kinds of things.

Most people do not know that actually in the later years of Ellen White's life, she was going all over Southern California and Northern California, giving sermons on 2 subjects.

1 was how to abide in Christ, and the other was how to raise your children for Christ.

And she actually wrote some and said, or said in 1 speech, she said, I would not be at my age, which would have been 81 then, If you knew how to take care of your children, the Lord said I was to come and teach you.

They were published in 1911, the great controversy in Acts of the Apostle, and because of that most of those sermons are in the unpublished manuscripts, Very available, very available, but there is a wealth of information on how to raise children that really deserves to be better known.

But there's lots of information there that you'll find exceedingly helpful.

On the bottom of the booklets, we've run out of booklets.

You can download, by the way, everything I've shared for free off the website.

We have 1 page, welcome, where there's more than 30 study guides on different subjects that can be downloaded for free.

Another page is just a link of resources within the Adventist Church.

Did you know that you can download more than 4, 000 complete issues of the Youth Instructor and more than 7, 000 issues of the Review and Herald and more than 5, 000 or 6, 000 of Signs of the Times, and all the medical evangelists.

And someone's uploaded on the internet 400 issues of the Junior Guide from 1950-something to 1970.

And on that page, I try to let people know where there are free books and resources.

For parents, and I'll just say this a little longer, and then I'll change.

How many of you have used the materials of My Bible first?

It's absolutely a marvelous, marvelous resource.

It's put together by actually a physician and his wife originally.

And they just put on an evangelistic series.

And she's memorized the books of the Bible she's learned to sing songs from that podcast yes sir my Bible first wonderful resource wonderful wonderful but anyway we came to talk about resources So I'd like to share a story with you of a couple by the name of François and Christine Colliere.

They were missionaries in South Africa, but it's a telling story.

When François, Francis, reached Larrabee, Africa in 1859, he was unmarried.

Not because he wanted to be unmarried, but because that's how things had worked out.

He wanted a wife quite badly, he felt he would need a companion, but he had such a respect for women and such a respect for the work of God in that regard, that he was unwilling to marry merely for the sake of comfort and companionship.

He wanted a wife from the Lord and was willing to wait until God sent him away.

Now he was going to go far away, way off to South Africa.

Before he left, he was invited to the home of a lady by the name of Madame André Walter, a place where many spiritual young people and missionaries came together.

And there he met a lady by the name of Christina McIntosh.

And from the moment he saw her, he knew that she was the 1.

But because he was to sail and he hadn't had really time to pray about it, and wasn't sure that this was an emotional impulse, he left for South Africa, believing she was the 1, but believing that he didn't have the right to say anything to her yet.

How many of you would be sailing off that many hours away in the 1860s when you think you just left the 1 God has chosen?

So he went, and he prayed about and prayed about, and Eventually he wrote back and made a proposal.

And they said, why bury your talents in Africa?

And she liked this more civilized world anyway.

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Series

The God-Arranged and Blessed Marriage

Let Her Be the One

Transcript

Parent Series

Sponsor

Recorded

Parts

The God-Arranged Match

1h 2m

Let Her Be the One

1h 2m

Principles of the God-Blessed Marriage

57m

Sound Doctrine