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Cross Roads: The Highway to Healing

Daniel Binus


This lecture will focus on the power of love in restoring the mind and body. We will look at how Christ’s love has the ability to restore the broken heart of anyone willing to come to him for healing. 




  • To review the neurobiology of love.
  • To understand how the love of Christ provides mental, emotional, social and physical healing.
  • To integrate Christ’s love in addressing the mental health needs of patients. For the clinician to learn to apply the principles of the cross to his or her own life to improve competency in mental health treatment. 


Daniel Binus

Clinical Director of Beautiful Minds Medical



  • October 30, 2015
    3:15 PM
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Dear Father in heaven. I thank you so very much for this opportunity now to stand before your people and to give this message of healing. And I pray in a special way that you would open our hearts and our minds to the power of the Holy Spirit. We know that it is the spirit alone. That can change our broken. Deceived. Hearts. It is the spirit alone that can give us wisdom. It is the spirit alone. That can give us the power to heal. For your honor and glory. So I pray now that as we spend these few minutes together that your power would be present. And that you would allow me only to speak those words that you would have me speak. And allow the thoughts and ideas. To come to use to the listener. As he would we pray in Jesus' name amen. All right so let's start by looking at the overview of what this hour is going to be all about. So we're going to look at what is love. So I think most people are interested in this topic right. Most of you have all experienced love. In one shape or form I should say all of us have experienced love. In one way or another. And so this is a hot topic. And why is Love important to us so we're going to explore that how we're actually hardwired for love and. Why we need it and how we have fallen out of love. So we're going to also look at that potentially individually. But also as a society. How have we fallen out of love. And then we're going to look at the cure. So we don't want to leave people hopeless we want to make sure everyone has hope. Leaving from here. So what is love. So this is the topic of many philosophers over the centuries. Many people have. Written poems about love stories books. What is love. Well we're going to look at a couple definitions here. And we're going to start with. The Greeks because they spent a lot of time talking about love. People like Socrates and Plato and other philosophers. So in Greek. You had four types of love. Arrow so got they fill the and store he so what are these different types of. Well I've got a is an unconditional. Self sacrificing love. The type of love that a spouse would have to another spouse or part of our love for our children. A love of God to man in man to God to will the good of another. So that's a gap a type love. Philia on the other hand is affectionate regard. Friendship. Not necessarily unconditional or self-sacrifice. Think of affiliating was somebody that's where that word affiliating comes from right. Philia and arrow us. Is used in regard to mostly sexual passion and store hey this is what they call common or natural empathy. Generally in the context of family. Also known to express mere except and or putting up with situations. So I'm sure most of you that have children can understand this one well you might say you know what. Right now. I'm not feeling that a god say towards you but i'm story a new anyway in other words I'm putting up with you because I love you but boy you're making a really hard for me to love you right now so that's kind of the. The store hates I blubbed. So the acceptance. But not that and conditional love that they got paid. Pertains to you. So the Oxford English Dictionary says that love is an intense feeling of the perfection or fondness for a person or a thing. A sexual passion or sexual relations in general and the scientific literature says that. Love is an emotional bond. To someone for whom one yearns. The satisfaction of a yearning. So the heart that you're for something and then that fulfillment. What about the biblical definition I find it interesting that the definitions we just looked at were actually. I think fairly narrow. Outside of the a gap a love. Definition. When we look at the Biblical definition found in First Corinthians chapter thirteen. And this is a beautiful all encompassing definition that Paul gives us. He says love suffers long and is kind love does not envy. Love does not create itself is not puffed up. Does not behave rudely. Does not seek its own is not provoked thinks. No Evil. And as we go through this less is kind of interesting. When I have read first Corinthians thirteen once in awhile. A look at this and compare it to where I'm at in my life and the like wow. I have a long ways to grow up and you find yourself maybe being provoked by your children or by a spouse or even by a friend or a colleague at work but yeah these things are difficult but this is true love this really is and shows us the kind of love that God has for us. And the kind of love that he wants to develop in this so it does not rejoice in the nick with the. But it rejoices in the truth. So it's not happy when it sees other people fall or getting themselves into trouble but it rejoices what people are doing well. It bears all things believes all things. Hope salty. Indoors all things will never fails. But you know at some point. Humanity always fails. And this is where we need to. Tap into the source of love. If our love will never fail we need to be connected. Deeply with the Lord. In order to be able to share that love with one another all right so now let's go on to looking at not just definitions of love but we're going to look at the neurobiology of love. We want to look at what science is discovering. When people talk about being in love. What actually happens in the brain. And in the body. So there's several phases. That they talk about. When they talk about a love relationship. And even though this is largely focused on a romantic. Type. Stage. It is applicable actually. Not only to romance but in a lot of ways to to maternal love and other types of love as well. So what are some of the things that happen in phase one of that romantic relationship. Have any of you here been in love can I see your hands. All right so what happens during that first phase of. Love is a question. What happens. What kind of things are going on in your body and in your mind. OK you're thinking about that person the law you can't get them out of your mind right. What else does your heart sometimes pitter patter when you get close to that person. Nothing can go wrong right. After us and it is amazing and it doesn't matter what other people tell you that they're wonderful person. So we're going to look at why this is neuro neurochemically actually. So in phase one you have that sense of euphoria and excitement. So it's all. It really is literally like being on a drug people get high. And they get addicted to being around that person. They're like wow I just can't wait to see them again. I don't really need to sleep very much because you have more energy. It's a highly stressful situation. It is a very taxing on the body. And if they is one went on for too long it would actually be very detrimental for the body. And the mind it would actually start destroying brain cells. And you would actually start becoming fatigued and chronically stressed from being in love. Did You Know That. So it's a blessing that phase one is a relatively short. And usually only lasts a maximum of about one year and that's the maximum. Usually it's even shorter than that. And again that's that's actually a blessing because otherwise we would wear our selves out. Being in love. So what's actually going on here. We have some of the. The things that are going on with love in the chemical basis of love and. Let's go the next slide and so we can look at that a little more closely so. Vase so Presson and oxytocin are key players. Now they suppress anoxic Towson or to chemical messengers that are very important. When we talk about attachment. And the love is certainly an attachment process. And it's interesting because they suppress and oxytocin have two different actions on the A Migdal So the middle is right here in this picture. And does anyone know what the Migdal was responsible for in the brain. It has held little to do with memory but so I heard someone say stress and that's true. Basically the I'm a doula is what triggers a fight or flight response it sends a signal down to the hypothalamus through the two cherry going down to the adrenal glands. And then you get what release from the adrenal glands. Adrenaline and also. Epinephrine norepinephrine and then. Cortisol as well. So the A Migdal is very important in that fight or flight response and day suppressing than oxytocin target the a big deal of especially. There's other areas of the brain. But they have a big effect on the make believe. And it's interesting because they have different actions of a suppress press and actually increases. Fear and stress. So you're falling in love and of a suppresses being released by the brain it's hitting the I'm a dilemma. And it's increasing fear and stress and it's warning you. It's a and. I don't know. You don't want to get too close to this person because they might do what they might hurt you right. And so then we keep our guard. So that's the safety mechanism. But oxytocin on the other hand is actually the a little and stress reducing. So do you see how there's opposite effect. So both are being released in phase one. And so you have. The battle going on. OK. Is this going is this relationship. Something to be more afraid of or can I actually start trusting this person. You see. And so over time. If this person proves that they are trustworthy. What do you think happens. Which one wins out does the oxytocin went out or does of a suppress went out. Exactly. So what happens as people start to get closer. And they start trusting that person more. Is that the. Oxytocin actually starts winning out. And the A Migdal starts becoming more calm around that person. And you start being less spastic around that person right. So you're not tripping over things as much when you're when you're seeing them and making a fool of yourself. I mean. Maybe I'm the only person that's done those sorts of things when you fall in love but that's what happens when that. When I fall in the. So interesting Lee as well. Both impact the dopamine reward system. Now. Why is the open. Mean important in the brain. What is doesn't mean do in the brain does anyone know the better than you expect to get I like that. So dope and mean motivates you. And it motivates you a certain direction. So of course is going to motivate you to spend time with that person is going to motivate you to think about that person is going to motivate you to buy flowers for that person. It also is very much involved in this. A sense of euphoria and excitement that we talked about. You know when people use drugs. That's what's happening you're getting that big rush of dopamine. And so. Being in love. Essentially is like being on a drug. You see you actually start getting addicted to that person. So that this is what makes a. Dopamine is usually involved when we talk about ruminating type thoughts. And so you can't get that person out of your head. So you keep obsessing about them keep thinking about them. All right so that's just phase one let's look at phase two phase two is passion will love what they call passionate love. And then phase two love actually starts turning into more of a good thing it's not quite as dangerous for your body. It's actually positive for your body. So that happens after several months to a year. You start feeling safe. Call and balance. And why is that why do you start feeling safe calm and balance to remember the struggle between basal Presson and oxytocin. It's because oxytocin has now won that battle. And you start feeling calm. Around that person and their research says that. Brain activity begins to be normalized whatever that means right. So people start acting a little bit more normal. You're not acting is crazy. The passion however remains high. Intimacy and commitment increased steadily. And the stress levels are actually decreased. Which leads to health benefits. So it's interesting that. At first the stress levels really go up but once you get over the hump and you start building that sense of trust and the oxytocin takes over more. You actually have a decrease in stress because you have someone there to supporting you encouraging you helping you. And again. Like we've been mentioning oxytocin is a key player during this phase. Finally there is Phase three. Which they call. Companion it. Love. Now. Not all long term relationships. Get to this level. And this. So some couples say at least from the research that they remain in that passion will phase of love. But a lot of couples enter into the phase three the companion. Love. And that's after several years. And there's a decrease in passion so they're not feeling as passionate about that person. However the intimacy and commitment to remain high. And in a lot of ways. Becomes similar to friendships. So you've probably seen. Older couples that are alike like this couple here. You know they don't have maybe that passion for each other but boy they love spending time with each other and they're like friends they tease each other and they have a good time. And that would be more of that companion it. Type. Love oxytocin. Again is key. During this phase. All right so we talked about more of the romantic type of love. I want to switch gears a little bit and talk about a mother's love. So how does that differ from romantic love. In the brain. Well the interesting thing is it's actually very very similar the same circuits in the brain are active. The only difference. Really that they found a couple small differences. Is that the brain regions active in sexual arousal. Like the hypothalamus is only involved in a romantic love. And you might say well you know what about that phase one when you have that euphoria and that excitement. And it's stressful. Do you think mothers. Involves a phase one in the relationship as well. It does doesn't it because when you think about it. What happens through that birthing process is that stressful. Greg says and then. After watching my. My for wife to go through that and. By going through it myself I can guarantee that. Yes it is a stressful process. But it's also an exciting and beautiful process too isn't it. And afterwards. You're you have a hard time sleeping sometimes because you just want to go and you want to look at that little baby. So the same sorts of hormones are being released. And again. The only real difference in the in the brain is that that area of sexual arousal. Is not involved. And the other thing that's interesting with mothers is that there's a part of the brain. That is involved with record. Recognition of facial expressions. That's much more active in mother. Mothering type love. As compared to remand to club. And that's interesting to me because mothers need to be what especially attuned to their children's extractions right. They need to be watching OK is my child hungry. Are they happy. Are they angry what's going on here so that I can meet the needs of the child. All true love activates areas of the brain Richen receptors for the attachment mediating neuro hormones oxytocin and base of present. So basically what we're saying here is oxytocin and basal Presson. But especially once you get not long term relationship. Oxytocin is a key player. When it comes to love. And I want you to keep that in mind because that's going to be key to some of the things are going to discuss later on. Now this is kind of interesting when we talk about unity in love and having that sense of oneness. Why is it that when we get married for example and we fall in love that we actually start losing in a lot of ways that sense of self and we almost tend to melt into the other person's personality so to speak and. And we have that sense of unity there's actually a Nero physiological reason for that. There's a theory called theory of mind how many here. Heard of theory of mind. No one now OK so VERY of mind is basically what it is is. We all have theory of mind what that means is. I have a theory. As I look at you. Of what sorts of things you might be thinking about. In other words. Are you are you. Are you. If your pain attention to what I'm saying carefully. Then my theory of mind about your theory of mind is saying OK well she's probably interested in what I'm saying. OK. That's three of mine. Being able to recognise by someone's facial expressions. And being able to basically predict what they're going to how they're going to act what they're going to say what they're thinking. OK. And a classic example for impaired theory of mind is autism or Asperger's. Now these people can often be intelligent. However they have a very difficult time with social interaction. Why. Because of impaired. Theory of Mind. So it's interesting because when they look at someone for example and I have some patients like this they'll be able to look at somebody. But it's almost like they're looking at a blank face instead of being able to read their emotions and what they're be able to guess are they happy are they pleases me are they upset with me. They can't tell. It's like they're looking at a blank face because they have very severely impaired theory of mind and that can. Of course can make interacting with them terrifying in a lot of ways. Now how is that related to the love. Well. So like I said it's the ability to determine other people's emotions and intentions. But theory of mind. Actually also distinguishes self from others. Which is kind of interesting too and that's another reason why people with autism and Asperger's. Often have a difficult time when people around them are upset. For example. It's very easy for them to get upset because they pick up on that energy they have a hard time distinguishing that this is other people's emotions and not my own. But then trysting thing is in love this area of the brain that's responsible for theory of mind is a whole so. Somewhat deactivated. And that's a big reason why we actually have that sense of unity. When we start falling in love. Does that make sense. But it's also why we need to be very careful. How many of you here. Think you can always know what your spouse is thinking or what someone else. Yes. Greg always knows. Well. We need to be very careful because if we have impaired theory of mind and we're the more in love we are then. We're not going to know what they're thinking we might surmise. But were you often going to be incorrect. All right so that was unity in love love is fearless. And here's a quote that said there is no greater warrior. Than a mother protecting her child. So what happens when you're in love is that the middle activity is the creased why because that oxytocin is winning out. And that protective instinct at the same time is increased. And people actually have decreased fear and anxiety. Under stress. Which leads to fearlessness. In love. So it's interesting to understand that of course we see people doing all sorts or craziest things when they love their children for example or when they love a spouse. But this is the reason. So now you can understand as well it's because the Migdal activities actually decreased and that protective instinct is increased. Love is blind. Love is blind Why is love line. Well there's cortical areas that are involved in critical judgments and negative emotions that are actually in in activated. So it's interesting because someone over here or earlier was saying that when you fall in love. What happens you. You basically you have a hard time seeing anything negative about that person. And this is the reason because those critical areas of thinking in your brain. Are actually shut down. But it's also. So it can be a bad thing. If you're if you're not recognizing that this person. Maybe is not the best for me. But it can also be a very good thing because we're not going to be critical we're going to be accepting and unconditionally loving. But it's also a good reason why we should always. When we're falling in love we should always get counsel from other people right and say OK. Is this am I seeing this correctly or am I seeing this inaccurately. Now fortunately. While we're falling in love we can still have good judgment about other things. So it seems to be a situational type of blindfold. And I want to point out one area of the brain that is very important when we talk about love. Which is the A C C. Right here. The anterior cingulate cortex. The anterior cingulate cortex is actually where emotional impulses and prefrontal cortex judgments meet. So in other words you have activity here. From the frontal lobe. Coming down to the anterior cingulate cortex. And then you have brain activity from the emotional center. Coming up to me in the anterior cingulate cortex. Now. Why is that important. Well. Because what the anterior cingulate cortex. Does is it integrates that information in other words. It takes the logic. That's coming in from the frontal lobe. And it takes the emotions that are coming up from the emotional part of the brain. And it basically processes that information. So that it can make a decision about what to do. Based on the situation and the answer single it cortex is actually worse science has found. That's where you make your decisions. Especially moral decisions. So deciding between right and wrong. And so the answer single a cortex is processing all that emotional information all that logical information. And then coming up with a final verdict based on that information. And this is actually where we experience empathy and compassion and love. So it's very interesting when we have that sense of compassion for somebody that sense of empathy. It's because we lodge. Please see that they are in need. But we also feel as well because the emotions and the logic are coming together. And that's in the anterior cingulate cortex. So like I said this is where we to use right from wrong. And when it's a lesion did other words if somebody has damage to the anterior cingulate cortex that actually leads to empathy problems. For example it leads to disturbance in maternal behaviors. Well it's interesting because we're going to talk a little bit about how. If we have the wrong connections coming into the anterior cingulate cortex it's not going to be working properly and other words if are the most if the emotions are Doraine just and and our emotions are more attached or. We have more allegiance to certain things like our values are more. I'm more interested in drinking alcohol for example than spending time with my family. Then the connections will be deranged in sending impulses into the anterior cingulate cortex to say OK decide to go to the bars of decide to go home and spend time with the family. So that could be a functional way that they anterior cingulate cortex but as far as lesion studies I'm not sure I don't know if it was strokes or actually traumatic brain injuries that they're looking at or just or just the malformation to be and it. OK. So as far as. Oh yes this is also where we choose to love or not so based on all the information. The anterior cingulate cortex helps us to decide is this person. Really safe for me to open my heart up to another words. M. I will lean based on logic and also what my emotions are telling me. And integrating that emotion. Am I willing to actually love this person or to allow myself to be loved. All right so what are some of the benefits of love. Well. I don't have to harp on these things I think it's pretty obvious. Yet pleasant feelings that sorority governs behavior motivates us to action. Helps self regulate emotions. So if we truly love somebody we're going to be willing to deny self oftentimes and say I'm going to do this for the good of my child I'm willing to deny myself sleep. So that my child can be fed in night or. I'm willing to forgive forego my meals. So that someone else can eat that's hungry because there's not enough food. So this is a sort of things that governs our behavior and again. Regulates our emotions and that it can even bring joy to self-sacrifice. Something that doesn't maybe feel good but it can feel good if we are in the. It promotes social contact. Reduces stress and improve survival and improves. Overall health. Alright. So we've talked about some of the benefits of love. How we're hardwired for love and really in a lot of ways how we need love. But I want to look at how our culture has really fallen out of love. So that's what we're going to look at now. And I call this section heart broke in a culture of hurt. So what is it. In America that has caused us to fall out of love. What is it that is cause. Love to grow cold. Well. I've identified two problems that I'm sure there are other problems. But these are two problems that I've thought of that have really led to a common destructive pathway in many of our lives and in. Specially many of the people that we see is. And it's very interesting I've done a whole study on what's happened in America since World War two in the advent of consumerism and how it's completely taken over our society. And how it's fractured families and really cause people to become more and more isolated. And then the other thing is trauma. And I would have to say that just about everybody that lives on this earth has been traumatized. In one way or another whether you know it or not because life. Let's face it life hard and life. Brings in its wake. Difficulties and trauma. All right so let's look at this a low closer. So what's the idea of the consumerist. So here we see a consumerist toddler and we can see how overwhelmed he is. And the ideas he who dies with the most toys wins. He who dies with the most toys wins. And you can see this idea like oh. What's going to make me happy if I'm not happy maybe I'll just do what I'll go shopping. And I have patients that do a lot of this they get into shopping addiction right they say well. I had a pretty rough day so I'm just going to go to the mall and buy myself a shirt and. I'll feel better now how how long do you think that that feeling better really last very long right. And what happens is that actually leads to social isolation. And one of the reasons for that is because when you're a consumer and when you're buying all sorts of things and when you have to keep up with the Joneses. Guess what that requires lots of money. Right. Which then requires lots of work. Exactly. And we've seen this shift in our culture from the one nine hundred forty S. through the one nine hundred fifty S. and sixty's were suddenly. Women were entering the work force like crazy. And it really caused a lot of isolation in the family instead of being at home and taking care of the children which look I'm not against mothers. Working at times. But as I'm not saying women should be out in the workforce at all but the mother's primary responsibilities that. To be at home with the children when the children are young children need that. And what does. What happened what happened in America is that what started becoming the babysitter instead. The television right. And kids started watching all sorts of television. And so instead of having their attachment to the family into the members of their family their attachment. Started to form with those things that they saw on television like needing the latest consumer gadgets and all these things and studies are showing that people are more and more socialite socially isolated because they're not spending time with each other they're spending more time with their phones or their gadgets and. It's becoming a big problem in America. That of course leads to emptiness because we need that connectedness. We need that sense of love. And it leads to the common destructive pathway that we're going to talk about here in just a minute. What about trauma. So what happens when someone is traumatized whether it's verbal abuse or physical abuse or something that instills fear and neglect someone says yes. That's also a form of trauma isn't it. So what happens when someone's traumatized. Well. You have the idea that you can't trust anybody right. Because if I can't trust those who were supposed to protect me those who are supposed supposed to take care of me. Then how can I trust anybody in this world. And so what does that lead to. Well. I need to protect myself right. So what happens then. Then people start building a wall around their hearts. And they say. No I'm going to protect myself I'm not going to allow myself to get close to anybody because it's unsafe. Which leads to isolation and leads to feelings of emptiness and leads to the common. Destructive pathway. So what is that pathway of destruction. Well. We talked about the isolation right. So from consumerism or from trauma. And that leads to the emptiness so I have that void in my heart that the toys can't filled the clothes can't fill the houses can't fill. I can't really be filled. Filled with anything. So you have you feel really empty. And that in turn leads to what it leads to addiction right. And by the way when we talk about addiction it's anonymous with another word. And that word is sin. All sin is addiction. So it's interesting how isolation. Leads. Leading to emptiness. Actually leads to sin. And that's how the devil will often. Set up a trap for people to fall into sin. And so one of the worst things that we can do it for R.T. struggling is isolate. Because well. Think about it this way. When a when a lion is trying to catch a prey what pray does it look for the weakest one the one that's away from the herd right the one that's by itself that's the easiest one to take out. And then addiction leads to further isolation. At first it might be like are a great times or doing this or whatever and go to the bar. But out over time the addiction takes over more and more. And leads to further isolation. And it leads to guilt and shame because boy. I understand this is killing me. But I can't stop and I'm ashamed of that. And I and people start drinking alone they start using alone they start shopping secretly start looking at her dog or see all sorts of things that. Try to trying to fill that void. And that leads to self-destruction. Now it's interesting when you look at trauma. The quantity and quality of maternal care actually determines adult social competence so if children are not properly cared for as youngsters. Then they will have a very difficult time being socially. Competent as adults. Neglect and abuse can do what can cause a bonding systems. To develop abnormally. So remember those bonding systems that we're talking about that vase so Presson and oxytocin system that allows us to actually experience healthy love and connectedness with one another if we don't actually develop that. As children. It becomes very very difficult to develop later on in adulthood. At the same time. You have an increased a Migdal or activity and damage to frontal cortical pathways. So remember the megalo is responsible for what. Fight or flight right. So they make the laws or sponsible for children that fight or flight response so basically what happens when you're traumatized. Is that fear that natural fear response is going to be increased dramatically. And I see that all the time with patients where they all come in and they. They look like a scared mouse almost. Because they've been so traumatized by what they've gone through in their past. And at the same time. It also damages the from a court of cool pathways which is the logical part of the brain. So what you end up getting is you have over developed fear circuits. So you have all these. Remember those connections coming into the anterior cingulate cortex from the emotional part of the brain. Those are going to be more fear. Connections and set of love connections and trust connections. And then you also have malformed reason and judgment circuits. It's very easy to be critical of people and their problems. But boy when I talk with people and I realize how much trauma is out there how much abuse is out there. I say wow. I think I should be doing a lot worse. If I if that happened to me. It's amazing. Based on the session when we look at this neuro science. How well that a lot of people actually do end up doing. I think that's only by the grace of God. Because it destroys the brain. And overall you get those underdeveloped love circuits but of course. We have that sense of a need for love. Human beings have an intense need for connectedness and love. Emotional isolation leads to feelings of emptiness. And we seek other sources to fill the void and drugs sex aggression. Gang activity and any addiction I mean there's so many addictions out there nowadays people look for things to fill that emptiness. But you know what they do not. Especially when you've been traumatized. They do not want to turn to the very source that they need which is true love Why is that. Because remember they've been traumatized they've they're afraid to open their hearts because they think I'm going to be hurt again the same thing is going to happen again. I'm not willing to make that decision to trust. So addiction becomes love. Substitute. It's interesting because the same reward pathway to remember we talked about that reward pathway especially in phase one of love how people get that euphoria and that excitement and they have that rush that dopamine rush. Well that's the same reward pathway that takes place when people are engaging in addictive activities. You get that dopamine release. And that leads to temporary exhilaration and euphoria. I'm going to take questions at the end. But where does addiction fall short because obviously addiction doesn't fill that sense of need for love in our hearts. Well. What happens is addictive drugs actually over stimulate the reward center. So basically when you fall in love and especially once you are that stress level kinds of comes down and you're at a more healthy state of love. Not such a stressful sate of love then you still get some dopamine release when you're around that person. But it's not nearly as much as when you're in addiction. Again. Double means not bad it motivates us to do things makes something. Feel exciting and enjoyable. But when you get too much. That's a problem because what is the do it shuts down the frontal lobe. And at the same time it over stimulates that emotional part of your brain. Which leads that emotions to become stronger than your logic and reason. OK so you get that and then afterwards of course so you get that big suit of dopamine. And then afterwards. After the drug wears off or you stop the behavior. Whether it's looking at her dog or fee or cutting yourself or whatever it might be. You get this drastic come down effect. And that feels horrible. So then afterwards. You feel even more empty than you did. To begin with and it damages the frontal lobe. And after the fact. What happens after the fact. After the fact there's no connectedness. Right. So you feel you've been more empty. And that's true even with television and that's why for example with television. People watch the television and stimulating some dopamine release. But then after you shut that T.V.'s The dopamine levels go down and. Especially if you're alone in the room. You actually feel worse. After turning the T.V. off than you did. When you were watching the T.V. Why. Because number one less. The dopamine come down but then also because you're just alone you're you're realizing what I just did. Didn't really bring me connected Dennis. Or fulfillment. So in the end it leads to more intense feelings of loneliness and emptiness and leads to further seeking to fill the void. All right so I promise that we would definitely get to the solution. And that's where we want to talk about how love is the ultimate solution. And how we can actually share that love and experience that love and why. Love is the solution. All right. So. Remember the anterior cingulate cortex is the heart of love. So that's where the emotional impulses. And the prefrontal cortex judgments meet. So remember the motions coming up from the bottom. The frontal lobe. Impulses of logic coming down. And the A.C.C. integrates all that information and makes the best decision on that information. So that's where we decide if we will allow ourselves to be loved or not but what happens if only fear. Impulses are coming into the anterior cingulate cortex and on top of that the frontal lobe is not working very well because you've been traumatized. What's. Panic attacks yes panic attacks especially when you think about getting close to somebody the close and I've seen this where where people are they logically know this is a really healthy relationship for me. And this could actually be in a way a human type of relationship if I would allow myself to get closer. But they have the inability to let their guard down because their fear because the impulses from the A Migdal are so strong those fear impulses that they are overwhelming the anterior cingulate cortex. And the anterior cingulate cortex says No way. Are we going to go there because this is too scary. So what is the deciding factor we basically did discuss that. So how do we break that loop. How do we break that loop. How do we actually fix that problem. When we've been traumatized or when we've gotten into the addiction cycle. For example and we're just our allegiance our values are more focused on buying things are getting things are alcohol or drugs or whatever it might be. Well it's interesting because all drugs of abuse have profound effect. Not only on that dopamine system but also on the oxytocin system. And remember the oxytocin system is the love very much involved in love. Additionally ecstasy and fantasy and these are drugs. Stimulate oxytocin systems. Causing pro-social and pathogenic effects. So these people that sit around and do ecstasy they're often. Massaging each other and and showing this. Faults a love that's not true genuine love but it's a chemically induced sense of love. Recent studies show X Ajah Nestle delivered oxytocin and other words. Oxytocin that they give people as medicine. Inhibit stimulants and alcohol self administration. Alter dopamine. Response. And prevent stress and relapse to drugs. Seeking. So essentially what's that what that saying is when they give people doses of oxytocin. Then people lose the interest in drugs that make sense because they are starting their brain is thinking oh I'm starting to get what I really need I'm sorry to get love even though. I know this is still chemically induced but it's interesting when we start looking at how this could relate to love oxytocin therefore has fascinating potential to reverse the corrosive effects of long term drugs of abuse on social behavior. And to perhaps an ocular it against future vulnerability to addictive. Disorders. So that interesting. So they're studying oxytocin chemically induced oxytocin to get people over addictions. I know a cheaper way of allowing people to get oxytocin Do you by now in the lecture. What is that how could people experience oxytocin exactly by experiencing. True love is not amazing. All right so let's look at this little experiment that they've done on rats. Well. You've probably heard of the war on drugs that was launched in the one nine hundred eighty S.. And basically the war on drugs was based on the premise that drugs drive addiction. People might. If you ask somebody will. Why do people use drugs. Then people. Most people say well of course because drugs are addicting. And they make you want to come back for more. OK But let's look at if that's truly. The full story here. They put rats in a cage. They put him alone with sea water bottles one was laced with one just water. And one laced with cocaine or heroin. So what was the outcome of this experiments. Well. Basically all the rats that were in this cave. Alone. Got addicted to the drugs. And eventually overdosed and killed themselves. OK. But there was a researcher and. He thought about this and he said well this is interesting because these rats. They're all alone. They're all isolated what would happen if we did the same experiments. But we put them with other rats. OK So check this out. So what he did is he built rat park. So rat park was a sponge place for us at all these ramps and enjoyable things and. The rats. Got to enjoy each others and so this was a verse Alexander. So he built rat park and. What was the outcome. So again they had the choice between the drugs or the water. So all rats tried both water bottles so they all tried the drugs right. But most rats actually shunned. The drugged water. Isn't that interesting. So they didn't all the get addicted and die. And less than a quarter of the drugs were consumed. And none of them died. Is not interesting. Why is that because they had the connectedness that they needed. They were isolated. All right Bruce Alexander decided to take the experiment one step further any real ran earlier experiments. And he isolated the rats for fifty seven days so he. He got them addicted basically in the isolated cage with the drug water. And they're there for fifty seven days probably almost to the point where they are about to overdose and kill themselves. But then he put them in rat. Park. So he said what if there are already addicted and then we put them into rat park what happened then. Well. The outcome was that of course there were some withdrawal symptoms. But pretty soon. These rats actually stopped their heavy use of drugs. Why. Because they were being fulfilled. In other ways. And they went back to their normal rat life. And they were essentially saved by the good cage now. You might say well. I'm no rat. And that's true. We're not rats right we're a lot more sophisticated than rats. But you know there's another social experiment that took place in Vietnam. And people were taken out of their comfort zone and they were essentially isolated in a place that they were very uncomfortable and stressed out and. What happened over there is that a lot of people started using heroin. Twenty percent of soldiers became heroin addicts and ninety five percent of the. OK. But here's the amazing thing is that after they came home from Vietnam ninety five percent of the Addicks simply stopped when they returned home is not amazing. Essential because they got back. Connected with their families with their country. The stress level went down when they came home. Heroin obviously is a very addictive substance and they were just able to stop. Like that because they had more of what they needed. All right so I'm seeing them running short of time and I still have a few slides. There was another experiment. I'm not I'm going to cover today. About Portugal as centrally and that experiment. They said OK. You know what we're going to instead of punishing criminals and isolating them for using drugs we're going to focus our money into connecting them with jobs. And with each other and with housing. And guess what the drug use went down dramatically. Compared to when they were throwing them in jail and isolating them. So we can see that in this age of loneliness. What is the opposite of addiction is the opposite of addiction sobriety. What is the opposite of addiction. That's right. It's relational connectedness. So are you sorry. Certain to see how we as human beings crave connectedness and if we don't get it. We're going to look for fulfillment. In all the wrong places. Consumerism and trauma over develop. Addiction and fear circuits while love circuits remain underdeveloped healing requires what. Call me in the fear circuits growing love circuits and empowering. The reason. Center. Abuse is really about distorted relationships when we're talking about trauma earlier. It's about thinking that everyone's out to give me I can't open my heart to anybody. Abuse children even when they're placed into love in my room and still act out because they're afraid to connect so how can we still overcome and reach people. Even when they've been abused. How can we bring those walls down. Well the children and any of us need. The experience of consistent. Impact they could to minute. To the feelings and needs and other words they need consistent love over time. And what what what happens then. Well. Over time. The frontal lobe of the brain as they see. OK this this person is no longer dangerous this person is actually not out for my harm but out for my good. The frontal lobe actually starts to recognize that. And it starts sending signals where is our sense any signals down to the anterior cingulate cortex saying that it's OK to open your heart. It's OK to open your heart. But then those fear circuits from the. Do you think those fear circuits are immediately comes after years of trauma know. So what's happening is that the fear circuits at the same time. Are battling in there say no don't do it at the frontal lobe is saying yes it's OK. And so you have this battle waging in the anterior cingulate cortex should I open my heart and give love a chance. Or should I run away and act out and sabotage the relationship. But over time what happens is that there is a gradual call mean of the fear circuits over time. If there's that consistent love given long enough that the anterior cingulate cortex will actually start sending messages down to the image Dillard's well. Saying you know what it's going to be OK this person really is trustworthy. And there's a gradual willingness to take a chance. First on chapter four says there is no fear in love but perfect love casts out fear why. Because fear involves torment but he who fears has not been made perfect in love. There it is. But the problem is how perfect. How perfect is human love is says perfect love. How many of you here love perfectly. There should not be one hand or is right. Because only God can love perfectly. In all human beings at one point or another will fail. And for every one of us that has been damaged by a life of sin. What do we need more than anything else for healing of our minds and healing of our hearts. We need to connect with the very source of perfect love. In order to calm those fears circuits in order to help us identify that God is not out to get us. But he's out to love us. He's out to redeem us he's out to restore us. In this the love of God was manifested toward us they God has sent His only begotten Son into the world that we might live through him. It is only by pointing people and by pointing. Ourselves by spending time at the foot of the cross and understanding how much God loves us by showing that through his dear son. That we can really start to become not just partially healed but fully healed. And that's what God wants for each one of us and that is the power of the cross. And I just want to spend one minute. Relating maestro. Because you know when I think about Christ method. Ministry of healing page one forty three says. What Christ method alone. Will be successful right what is Christ method. Mingled with men as one who desires for their good showed sympathy for them. Minister to their needs. One their confidence and then bade them follow me. When I think about that. Yes. And my mingling with people. Yes and my showing sympathy for them. Yes and I ministering to their needs. Yes. And I willing their confidence yes my patients keep coming back. They must have confidence in me. But have I taken that final step have I've paid people have I encourage people to say. Follow Jesus. Because he is the one. The only one that can give you the peace that your heart longs for that perfect love. That will cast out fear that will fill the yearning of your heart. It's uncomfortable for me and I've been praying the Lord is been laying that is on my heart saying. DANIEL. You need to present the message of the cross. To your patients you need to lift up Jesus. Don't be ashamed. Paul's efforts for little fruit Nathanson spy amazing arguments that could not be controverted he was having controversy with the philosophers of the day. And they said we can't. We can't say anything. But his arguments for very little for and he learned from this. And I want to ask us has our work at times worn very little fruit. Why is that. Have we tended to use philosophical arguments and reasoning and been been critical and tried. Henceforth Paul adopted a different manner of labor in simplicity. He pointed men and women to Christ as their Savior. He said you know what. It's not entice ing words it's not. Amazing arguments. It's going to be the power of God. The power of love that actually limb. Wins people's hearts. Over. That's what Paul learned for I determined not to know anything among you save Jesus Christ and Him crucified. My speech was in demonstration of the spirit and power. And when we lift up Jesus what that does is it allows God to actually go to work. But when we try to use our own human. Critical Thinking. And our own logic and reasoning to persuade people. We are actually cutting short. The very working of the power of the Holy Spirit because we're trying to do it in what. In our own power. But God is saying no. I want you to step aside. I want you to be a little child and just share your testimony of what Jesus has done for you and that is what is going to open the floodgates for me to use my spirit to convict these people's heart and bring them to their knees and help them to understand. The love that Jesus has for them. Isn't that the way our ministry should be working. If those who today are teaching the Word of God would uplift the cross of Christ. Higher. And still higher. Their ministry would be far more successful. If sinners can be led to give one earnest look at the cross. If they can obtain. Just one look. One look at the cross if they can obtain a full view of the Crucified Savior they will realize the depth of God's compassion. And the sinfulness of sin. So loves tests is am I willing to share. What Jesus has done for me and am I willing to do that. Are you willing to do that even if you think it might be foolish. Even if someone might score new even if it's not popular to do so we must pray for courage. And I was going to share a testimony something that happened just this week when the Lord gave me courage to do that but I know we're out of time. So I'm going to end. But I want to end with. A quote from actually apostles. From the cross. Shines the light of the Savior. And one at the foot of the cross. The center looks up to the one who died to save him he may rejoice with fullness of joy for his sins are pardoned. Kneeling in faith that the cross. He has reached. Highest place to which man can attain. Through the cross we learn that The Heavenly Father loves us with a love that is infinite. Can we wonder that Paul exclaimed God forbid that I should glory. Save in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is our privilege also see glory in the cross. Our privilege to give ourselves wholly to him who gave Himself for us. Then with the light that stream some Calvary. Shining in our faces. We may go forth to reveal this light. To those in darkness. We talk about giving the last message to the world we talk about God's glory. Enveloping the whole earth. What is that glory that is the glory of Christ's love. Shining through his people. And it is only when we're willing to step out of the way and allow God to shine forth through us. As we become sanctified by his love and we're willing to pour that love. Into those people were working with. And were willing to say. It doesn't matter what you think of me. I'm doing this for God. It doesn't matter if I look foolish. I'm willing to speak simple words. So that people's hearts will be touched and healed by the power of God. May God help us to give us courage to do this in these last days. Aspire heads for rid of her. Dear father. I don't know about every heart. Here. But I know my heart has yearning for that Richard experience and each one of us Lord. Needs a richer experience and I plead with you that you would open our hearts to see that need and open our hearts to understand the message of Calvary the message of the cross. Understand what Jesus means to us. Lord give us courage in these days. Give us the face. The humility of a small child. The willingness to be foolish for you the willingness to do whatever it takes to share that love with those that we come into contact with phrasings in Jesus name Amen. This media was brought to you by audio person. A website dedicated to spreading God's word through free sermon audio. And much more. If you would like to know more about audio verse for you would like to listen to more sermon. Leave visit. W W W dot. Audio verse. Dot org.


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