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The Weight of Waiting

Dee Casper

Presenter

Dee Casper

Director of the CORE Evangelism Training Program

Recorded

  • April 13, 2019
    3:00 PM
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Father in heaven thank you for the privilege to address an important topic and I just prayed Lord Jesus that you would do something in this room right now that will minister to each of us and to those who hear it afterwards God in heaven do something wonderful Now we pray and we ask this in Jesus' name amen. Hello welcome Phyllis. All right so 1st off shameless plug I am working with the Pennsylvania conference and we're starting a school of evangelism with multiple tracks so the 1st thing is 9 months in a link that's based in Pennsylvania for 18 plus basically working on a 2nd track during that 9 months of people who come basically in January and go till June 1st with a main emphasis on Bible work with work study options to make it more affordable and we think it can be a life transforming experience here's what you'll do by work canvassing digital media evangelism health of Angeles and we're getting agriculture in the spend about 3 to 4 weeks overseas doing mission work. In address the topic of mental health we see a lot of schools where the training people to be missionaries where the problem is if you have lots of skills in ministry but you can't get out of bed because you're saying with depression what good is it and so we want to address the topic of mental health practical Christianity public speaking and so forth so here's who's teaching We're stoked for this Dwight Nelson Pavol Goya James Rafferty Stephen Grabner skip McCarty Don Mackintosh Randy Siebold Nathan or energy it was our ally Israel Ramos Rico Hill Paul Callan if and Chad Bernard and others so anyone willing to me amazing experience you can find more information on our website conference dot org forward slash core and. There's also a postcard right here so you get access to those and take them with you and if you like to take more back to share with your collegiate age group or your high school age group your church feel free to take more cards with you no problem I'm totally OK with free advertising to places I can't get to and lastly there's a program that we develop for 3 B.N. some friends and I for the demographic of the 15 to 30 age range dealing with raw heavy topics that no one wants to talk about publicly and so we established a process where people can ask their questions anonymously and then they can they can see the answers to their questions anonymously it's all on You Tube Facebook could argue are you. 3 B.N. on Facebook or 2 to 3 B. as You Tube channel is a playlist called Rock questions relevant answers. We're working on a process of planning for season 3 we filmed 26 episodes there are only 14 minutes in length and you can share them easily through Facebook and You Tube with people and the great way that you can ask questions and receive answers in total anonymity so that stuff you may not be comfortable in asking people I hope you do have people your local church you can talk to family pastors and so forth but if you don't this is an option. Giving biblical Christ energy answers and so on this topic I saw a post earlier this week from someone he's an amazing singers name's Vasa and he posts on Facebook last week is that I think it's funny when people ask me for relationship advice if I knew what I was doing it wouldn't be sleeping next to my unfolded laundry hash tag I'm just saying Now I may be a little more neat than Vasa is I put my laundry in my you know I can't leave it on the bed to sleep like I get a full that stuff and put it away but. So we're going to be addressing the topic of singleness was what I was asked to speak on so I have 2 messages or 2 presentations the 1st one is the weight of waiting. The weight of waiting. Now God having his people wait to receive promises from him is not a new idea in fact Scripture is filled with situations like this right so here's some examples Abraham waited 25 years to receive the child that God promised him Isaac was nearly 40 when he got married and seem to dispute totally contents like he's just doing life there's no complaints Abraham is the one that sins as servant to go look for a girl he brings her back and they get married that day boom done game over. Isaac said that Jacob he waited 7 years in 7 days for the girl that he wanted. At least he got to see her but the thing is I was just informed of this this morning the guy was nearly 80 years old when he gets married. Yes look at the genealogies look at how long things took Yeah it's mind boggling no one talks about that so he was pretty pretty old Joseph waited 14 to 20 years for his promise 14 to 20 years that's a decent length of time for something that was an amazing promise from God God said they're going to bow to you and then the stuff that Jacob Joseph goes through for this promise to be fulfilled seems like it's all a waste but the amazing thing is Joseph never would have been the prime minister of Egypt heading up and thrown in prison which tells me there are pain in the waiting must be directional that makes sense it's not futile it's direction there's a purpose in the waiting it that waiting is where we feel that when we're waiting nothing's happening but we're actually on a track it's a conveyor belt it's leading us to something important here with me. I think Shane's hanging out here just because he says he's filming but I think she's hanging out he wants to get these these gyms for the single guys were in this thing together. I won't tell anybody. Anyway having people wait is not something that God is is you know this is a rare thing many people go through the situation and if you're thirsty take the water of life really my brother got you hooked up right thank you that all right in fact some of the 5 talks about this in look at the language that they use says he sent a man before them Joseph who was sold as a slave they hurt his feet with fetters he was laid in irons in the Listen to this until the time that his word came to passed what was it that tested him the word of the Lord the thing that tested juice of while he was waiting was the promise God gave him that he was waiting for and that's very helpful for me to know that again my waiting is not a waste right it's not it's not this act of futility God is up to something God is active in our waiting evil we feel like we're passive you with me and we shouldn't be passive in our waiting we'll get to that but this verse is amazing it's been such a blessing to me until the time that this word came to pass the word of the Lord tested him all right know how vulnerable to be in this I don't really know it was smart and she told him not to record in and she swing in for the fences for the ladies. The will to see where this goes so I went through an experience where in high school 1st of all I. I was in a situation where I was doing more work than I was receiving and if you've been a situation like this relationally where you're doing all the work you're not getting much in response but you're kind of a slave to the infatuation this is before I was converted and it was just a horrible situation for me went on for like 2 and a half years is just not not good and I seem to keep getting myself in these horrible situations relationally and fully understand why. Once I get converted I end up meeting someone a great person godly person comes from a solid evidence family which is important to me because I grew up in a broken home my parents got divorced I was 4 or 5 you know 3 or 4 I guess and around them and my dad got custody of mom didn't Mom Gets had been married once already before the guy mom marries after mom and dad get divorced beat her up really bad I wasn't there when it happened but I was dropped off for one of my visitations with her right afterwards I'm 5 so my parents already been divorced at the 1st trauma that my mom opens the door she's living in the projects my dad's dad lives in a nice neighborhood you know up the way and so he comes to drop me off my grandfather does and mom opens the door she's purple she's blue she's swollen she's not the person I know she told me she fell down the stairs but I wasn't stupid I knew better. But I was scared mediately like I was horrified physically scared and my grandad wasn't stupid he called the cops they threw the guy in prison for like 10 years we never saw him again but I say all of this because these 2 things literally put my life in a tailspin and there were things that came into my life at that early age I was lying perpetually at this stage I was stealing stuff at the age of 5 from stores and no one knew. Myself in a bunch other strongholds and it was because I didn't understand 1st I didn't know Jesus didn't know there were solutions and Jesus was basically an church growing up so I didn't have that experience but the other situation I went through was that I. Never cried myself to sleep never went to counseling so I'm just a messed up kid from then on right couldn't sit still they put me on Ritalin they said I had a D.D. and if I did or not because of what I will basically borderline unteachable was that I wasn't smart I just my head just wasn't there you know I mean when you're when all you're thinking about is knowing pain that you're feeling without even knowing that you're feeling pain you don't think about stuff like that and so these things kind of set me into a tailspin The problem is those things follow me into my conversion into ministry because I never dealt with them because I didn't know was dealing with it it's actually possible to be numbing pain without knowing that you're feeling pain and I was numbing pain for 25 years until I came to understand who I really was and how broken I was and the things that God brought me through to see my brokenness happen to be in this area relationally and waiting on the Lord so I meet someone they have a great godly family that was important to me because I came from a broken home I want someone who values the home and wants to protect the home from nonsense and I spent about a year praying about the situation before I even approached them or their families had a friendship praying praying praying God gave me peace to go forward I have writing a letter to her parents I mean I was Nepal washer stuff on courtship I read all kinds of stuff like I'm just I want to know what God wants and to study it to the deepest degree and there's a lot of things that I wish I didn't know then or didn't do then base most of what I was learning and hearing but I just no one told me so I just ate up every source I could. And so anyway I approach the parents the parents basically say we don't think she's ready we appreciate the way you're going about this and that you're going through us 1st and so they value that but this basic a little hardship because the months went by then they bring it up to her and she just thought like how could he even know me well enough to think of such a thing but like I was paying attention right it wasn't just like all here's a here's a Facebook picture she pleases me we'll get her for me right it wasn't like that like this was a friend of mine that I was in contact with us paying attention their character I had met the mom like I had a decent understanding of where it's coming from but they were thinking of these things so from their experience they just feel like how could you even consider something like that but so I send the letter to the parents and God gives me the promises of Isaiah Chapter 40 verse 31 that those who wait in the Lord shall renewed their strength they show mount up with wings as eagles they shall run and not be weary they shall walk in the faint and God just started hammering me with promises now this stage of my life I really don't know how to hear the voice of God I just got a Bible College and that was how God kind of started teach me how to hear from him for myself and not be dependent upon my dad spiritual experience 911 what my dad up to the fact that he wasn't ready to meet his Lord dad finds Jesus I'm totally clueless because I'm a los messed up teenager nothing is pain all the time and then dad eventually wins me then he encourages me to start watching 3 B.N. that I see David Asher back to stuff that I go to rise to get baptized that arise but like to really know how to hear the voice of God for myself to really know about faith and prayer in these things like I was converted and I was committed and wasn't leaving but there were certain maturity points in my experience that were not mature just because I grew up unchurched you know like there's still a bunch of scripture songs I don't know I don't know whole lot about Pathfinders like setting grow it was culturally Baptist if anything I wasn't attending church and so anyway I'm in a situation where God through this process is teaching me a lot and going to rise as the 1st call word or. God was teaching me not be so depend upon my dad to know what he wanted for my life so though so I waited in the being a 5 year process where prayer Providence Christian council in the ward all were saying the same thing this is the place in weight and the person never saw I die on that that wasn't where they were that was what they were wanting and what do you do when they don't read books on this I wish they did maybe they do and so what do you do when you feel that the will of God is in you one direction but the only remaining variable equation is an OK with that and I made mistakes during this time of waiting because I didn't know what I was doing and I kind of had this friend of mine is kind of phrase it this way of the sense of like relational predestination. You know there's like there's one option and one option only and and nothing can stop it is like once saved always saved but in this is a relationship like once ordained always ordained The problem is we believe in free will and so I cannot tell you even to this day. All of the reasons why what happened happened and that there's still a dark cloud over that friendship that can't go on like I tried to bury the hatchet last year and they just weren't open to that in Ironically I was in the area where they're from They're not there anymore but their family is and I was thinking about them and their family when I was in the area just like 3 days ago preparing for this presentation and of all things someone tells me go check out this place or something like secondhand backpacking camping gear I love the outdoors so I go to this place and of all things there's an alteration shop right next door the mom is walking through the parking lot like I'm in a state that I don't live in and go to this place and I see the mom and it was able to just catch up on your other families doing what we print works I still pray for the family but I made a lot of mistakes guys a whole bunch of mistakes that I wish that I could sit me down 7 years ago and tell me what I know now. I wish I'd gotten that. But what do you do when ever everything seems to go one direction that was doesn't so anyway years go by the promise didn't come to pass and at the end of the day I had to make a choice God gives people free will and love requires freedom and the most loving thing you can do in situations like that is give them what they want if God speaks to them when they come back that's one thing but you just have to move on and so you know I made a lot of mistakes and then I wish I didn't here's the thing that made it hard for me so he gave me this text while I was going through that was a blessing but it also was a bit of a curse because we believe in free will but I felt like I didn't have a free will because I felt like God kept telling me to stay put but they didn't want to join in the situation and make an enemy out of them not at all I wish the best for that family and I think the world of them I don't know why all the things happened as they did maybe it's all my fault I don't know. But it always has and will return to the stronghold it says you prisoners of hope I felt like I was a prisoner of a hope that never came that I couldn't leave my jail cell yet I was still waiting the whole time this is even today I declare that I will restore double to you God promises to restore those situations we go through while being a prisoner of hope and I'm grateful for that but let me let me share some things with you that I wish someone would have told me I did not I knew some of this and so I didn't make all the mistakes that people do make in these situations but here is one of them a big list of never sex or not really but this one never that you should never ever ever in the history of never ever do. God told me to be together never say that are you hearing me I don't care if Gabriel himself shows up to your house tonight shut up and pray and let God do it you don't tell them that that happened and I'll tell you why because what is it happening I'll tell you why she needs to hear from God for herself Gabriel can speak to you he can speak to her. The idea of pursuing someone is one thing but saying the words God told me were to be together is totally unacceptable never do it ever now I knew not to do that in this situation but the problem was I was still acting in a way that made them feel that God told me and so though I never use the words I was still doing things in a way that made them feel pressured spiritually and cause a lot of problems and I wish I didn't do that and if I could ever have an audience with this person again the 1st thing I'm doing is apologizing for that 100 percent I wish I didn't do that again then write books on this no one told me not to do this maybe people do write books eyes never read them but to form a spiritual manipulation if God speaks to you clearly and says this is the person and wait then wait it does ask you to take action take action but never use these words are going to standing express why you have an interest in appreciation of the character still speak with their parents do all of that stuff but never say God told me and never imply God told me because the problem is there are girls who just people in general that may feel like all man will may be and they may go into this thing based upon what you feel God told you and yet they have no answer from the Lord for themselves so what happens if you guys into getting married and then you have difficulties because if you're aware of this but when you get married you're going to have difficulties I don't care what courtship teachers telling you if you just follow this recipe it's amazing they're lying to you you're sinful human beings who both wrestle with stuff and there will be difficulties in your marriage every marriage will have them even God ordained marriages had difficulties and so when you have a situation in which and I'm not saying they're all going to be a disaster either but it does happen guys and I get frustrated with some of the culture on relationships and the way in which they communicate the seeming money back guarantee because it destroys people because they think if I just do this work and things don't work and their whole their whole identities is destroyed. And so we need to be careful with that because we live in a world with free will with sin and so forth we can't guarantee anything what we can do is trust God to make up for whatever goes on so the way in this situation you don't see this because what happens when you get married and you get to that season of difficulty you know she's a start thinking maybe I made the wrong decision because she has no pillar of cloud in her own experience she has no Evan easer in her own experience she's in this thing based of all what you felt that God told you and I'm not saying that God isn't speaking to you I can't know but what I am saying is you don't need to use those words and you don't use that language or use any form of spiritual tactics or manipulation and so there were things that I was doing I was trying to change this person I knew this person was hurting and dealing with some stuff and so here I am sin in quotes in other things trying to fix this person in the name of the Lord that's called spiritual codependency I was finding my worth because what I was really doing was trying to get them to change their mind so I could receive what I felt God was telling me people have to have freedom and what I did not understand because no one told me was that what I was doing just because God is showing me what's going on the things are wrestling with and so forth and show me quotes and things along those lines I believe God was working in this but I didn't understand was that God was showing these things to me not so that I would do something but so that I would pray so that he could do something be with me God was helping me to see some of the situation that underly had with the what the problem was but that was so that I would pray so that he had permission to work because if this person doesn't see it they're probably not praying about it. And I failed as a leader in that sense I was trying to change them instead of trusting God to do what he said he would do so I caused a lot of problems which made them even less inclined to want to be with me and for good reasons I wouldn't want to be with the me that was pursuing them either as much as because I'm a dude I mean like that the things I was doing in the mistakes I was making and the immaturity in my experience but here's the problem I've listened to every poll poll washer sermon are similar in sermon on courtship I know everything there is about relationships are right I want a whole there's a sense of arrogance that comes from knowledge and so we think if you just follow this recipe and follow these steps I know you're fine if you just follow this recipe and follow these steps then you're not going to have any problems that's not true and so I there was a sense of arrogance for sure and a sense of entitlement because you feel if you know we're God is leading that they just need to get with the program not understanding that we're all growing role going through and we need to show the mercy and compassion is God does so I wasn't very merciful I wasn't patient I made a lot of mistakes guys I'm really ashamed of myself and believe in all honesty and then when things kind of crash crash and burn at the end because I got really really really frustrated with me as time went on for good reasons. I spiraled the same time ago in the radical poverty while in ministry and going through depression and loneliness and discouragement and a failed promise and what refers to it as a moment of. Apparent failure and it just put me into depression for like 23 years while in public ministry preaching my guts out most sermons an audio version of me preaching the darkest experience of my life and no one knew I didn't even know how much it was affecting me so anyway because I wasn't discipled in this area and how come my parents give me this they were raised abot to slid along knowing these principles so it isn't Hosea that my people are destroyed because of a lack of knowledge while I relationally was destroyed because of lack of knowledge but that wasn't the only thing so I had a situation so I'm going to give a bit of my story of the timeline your story may not be my story and that's totally fine but I'm going to show you how it comes from the conclusions I have and I'm still growing him in I do not want a Ph D. in singleness and had to ask and I'd like to graduate personally. But all that being said I'm not like desperate for anything either like I got I got standards and stuff and I want God to make that choice not me but still I don't have all the answers for you guys I'm not claiming to like my boy boss or my friend. But so I gave up on looking so I heard this counsel and it's really good counsel someone told me you want to find a wife stop looking and it sounds so counter-intuitive like. OK yeah that makes perfect sense you want to get a job stop looking see how that works out for you still live in a mom's basement you know even cheesy mac and playing video games as I were going for nobody and as Dr Jackson and Eric waltz beat us up today made it abundantly clear ain't nobody need to get married when they don't have a job. Listen he doesn't have a job he's not worth it. And so anyway so this situation I I felt that that council didn't apply to me when I was going through that 5 year span of my life because I felt I knew what God wanted so the idea is very noble even want to find a wife stop looking but I felt that I knew what to do. What I didn't understand was you can surrender the importance of the pursuit even while waiting on the Lord I didn't know that so I go through a situation where I basically disqualified myself from good counsel because we do that right we want to get mine so all explain it away so I can get mine that's what I did and I didn't get mine and then God brought me back I took 40 years of wandering around the wilderness and another user retreat I've gone through a situation where I had that fill through an interest in one person a great person godly person there in ministry didn't work out then another person godly person person ministry didn't work out and after that one god just can I went to a youth retreat the following week and was speaking to my buddy told me how he met his wife and I met his wife when he stopped looking meets this girl great girl the right to have a baby she's mad pregnant and they're about to have a baby and anyway he tells me I was 30 in my thirty's which already is reminding me of me because that's my age he's converted in Adventism I think and then that reminds me of me and he said I just I gave up on looking I told the Lord this is too important me I'm going to give it to you in the Spirit of God just spoke to me and said Listen to this man listen to him I'm speaking to you right now so I did so I surrender the whole thing to God and within a week I had a situation man I don't know if I can tell the story how do I tell it without telling it. So I get a phone call from a guy that I know and the guy says Hey. I was preaching someplace remain nameless and I stayed with his brother of all people and I know the guy and I said Hey I heard you stay to my brother's place last week it's like what really I don't think about the fact the names are the same as the way they pronounce their last name in the way that I thought you pronounce the guy knows last name was not the same that was spelled the same so I think connect the dots and the guy says Hey we start talking let's partner in ministry as working in media and his ministry could benefit from that I guess and then he says have got these daughters I swear to you he told me daughters to this day I believe that's what he said but I was apparently mistaken but he said you have got these daughters and live in the area heard as you're speaking in this area soon so yeah that's true and I don't know what he means like the last he wants me to invest in them but this guy comes from a culture where the parents get their kids married you know and I know this I'm just like all well maybe it's that you know like the parents are going in kind of doing this arranged marriage type situation so I want to do with all this because I'm an introvert 1st of all 2nd of all like I would kind of like some say in the matter like and they think I'm a public figure not by choice I'm going into or I did ask for this it scares me to death but this idea like kind of public figures like I'm not going to go be known as the philandering evangelists is religious like Baskin Robbins you know taking girls hearts all around the country no way and so like it takes longer for me to even get to that point because of what I do. And I'm not all that hip on the situation so in a way I'm back at the place where I stayed with the brother back there for another good 2 weeks later on the other side of the country and I go to the brother and said Hey just so you know don't don't tell your brother told us but your brother is totally trying to set me up with his daughter what I didn't know was it was the brother's idea the people I stayed with all this guy stayed here spiritual What about fill in the blank and then the dad calls there's a whole range maker's type somewhat set and so I'm talking to this guy who tells me a very similar story he went to rise and he met some. And soon after that process it was pursuing them and it didn't work I did a story just like mine and he said I gave up looking at all man the Lord is just reading my mind right now and so he ends up. Telling me they gave up looking in he's an engineer and he's working in a gold mine in Nevada and he finds gold in the gold mine and it's this girl and he tells me the whole love story had all came about in the Lord is behind it is a blessing and all right Lord I hear what you're saying and in that moment I get a message from the daughter of the brother of the guy that I stayed with on Facebook saying hey I see that my dad or my dad said something but anyway if you're in the area let me know I'm like oh snap what do I do because like. I like I'm a people pleaser but I also don't lead people on and I just had this like because I have all these ridiculous courtship presentations in my head I'm not opposed to courtship but there's some versions are kind of appalling to me and so I overthinking everything and so I'm just like oh man what do I do like. But they can see you read the message that you're stuck and so I go I never got your mate like read to 57 pm. And so I don't know what to do so I end up in a situation where I just wrestle and so I said All right. Yeah I don't actually live in the area my mom was in the area but you know I just happened to you know visit but I'm speaking a couple weeks and she said yeah I know my dad told me I have to go and so I go and then anyway. So I text someone that I know that knows her because I don't know her but through Facebook a friend of theirs people who know her and I ask them the whole situation where you know by this person Long story short we end up just having one meal together in then. I kind of get a feel for the situation that well this isn't actually a total disaster like what do we do but here take time for you make up my mind so this is kind of a private pursuit and anyway eventually stuff kind of goes on but through that process at the end started sharing some things with me that I wish they wouldn't told me like so I told them the situation and then I changed the topic immediately and I ran right to women's ordination just to get out of the conversation like all they did had anal counsel you know I can you know the voting for this in my opinions on that yea or nay totally Don't Matter by the way our opinions are basically worth nothing so you just keep them to yourself unless someone ask you directly when I have to prognosticate about them on the internet but. So anyway as I'm leaving the brother's wife chimes in says Oh and by the way she's also the former Miss Teen and then fill in any state in the 50 states I mean thought is don't be shallow don't be shallow don't be shallow in. Any way so I go through the process and though this situation didn't work out there was something that I did learn through this process because imagine I surrender looking within a week I get this call from the dad then the other situation I meet the person is thinking Is this an answer or a test I did know and because in the province around I feel like I owed it to the process to at least see what was going on but didn't start a relationship right we just responding time together trying to figure it other out talked all the time asking each other quite the heavy questions like when you're when you're 30 you don't mess around like do you want kids yes or no. How are we raising our kids like we just went through everything like I'm not I'm not going to mess around and to see if we're not on the same page and let's not go any further you know it's not worth it when I move in the same direction in a way things kind of fall apart around Christmas time and. But this person one thing that happened during that span that God brought me a lot of healing because I've dealt with so much rejection of the topic of relationships in my life that I just it it wasn't easy for me to muster the guts to make another attempt any more because I had 2 such bad experiences the reason why it had such bad experiences is because it was too important to me because I do with all the stuff with my mother bringing with my mom in particular she demanded divorce 7 times she'd get custody but my mom was rejected by 2 moms her biological mother and her adopted mother which led mom to run to relationships to try to find her worth in her purpose and her value she was looking for men to do for her would only God could do but how would she know here's a Makes even worse her parents were bad religion through and through so her parents are in church 8 days a week and every one of the church loves them but the kids really wrestle with them and if you really say that situation or not they will love your parents in church but you struggle because you see what they don't see and so anyway my my mom wrestles all this stuff and so mom's actions led to me feeling rejected so mom being rejected by her mom's led to her living a life that led for her son to feel rejected by her his mom sin does that doesn't it these generational curses and this is a thing when we don't deal with our brokenness we can actually become the very thing that we hate grow up in a home with an abusive father and we find ourselves being short tempered with our wife and we hate it. Or whatever the situation may be and so anyway the put the topic was too important he said God couldn't let me succeed in relationships until he was more important than anything else and I was wrestling through this process and I was a slow learner in this area because we're so much pain for what I went through and so anyway but this girl was different. She called every day after work every single day without fail and every day period and we talked we prayed together do other things and this was a beautiful woman this is a woman of accomplishment right she had a master's degree she was working in a good job like so many a woman of accomplishment and had accomplishment in pageants beforehand and so I felt because of my self hatred all my brokenness from my past and a lot of unworthiness I had a lot of feeling I was a lovable that I wasn't good enough because of all what I've gone through in life and I never went through the process like Martin Luther did of thinking that I had to do stuff to get God to love me it was the love of God that reached me in the very beginning that's been my true north for my compass and I praise God for that I didn't have the baggage of bad religion all this other stuff I knew the gospel I knew that God loved me individually but the problem was I wasn't letting that truth heal this area of my brokenness I got in the process of salvation but I didn't get the process of relationships with me and so I end up in a scenario where. So I didn't go through that Martin Luther went there but I tell my accountability partner one day on the phone is like this girl so different like it's I think I understand what Martin Luther felt like the day he was on his knees climbing the stairs and I realized that I don't have to work to receive God's love because every relational pursuit I had was me doing all the work in getting nothing in response was like relational legalism or something you know my situation but in a situation I didn't have that it was unique kill it was unique and so I end up in as I told like now I must now you know what Martin Luther must've felt like when he got the Gospel and it wrecked me guys totally wrecked me because in that situation I felt like. I don't have to work to receive this person's love I just have it and it's very healing for me to know that I could be loved and accepted by a woman who's beautiful who's successful right a woman who's going places in life because all the self-hatred and worthiness of my own experience it was healing in that sense the relationship wasn't going to work things kind of fell apart before it started fully but I learned a valuable lesson through that process and God led me into that process and I'm thankful for the healing that I received and this is where I have a bit of a concern I believe in courtship Please don't misunderstand me but the way which it can be taught at times kind of implies that like it's one and done you're going to marry the 1st person you date but I don't see that guarantee anywhere in Scripture and you may you may differ with me on that that's fine and it causes a lot of emotional psychological damage to people there are people I love and care about who are wrestling with that still right now because that situation they put all their eggs in there I'm only give of myself emotionally to one person and it could be that that was a means to an end and not an end and I think we need to be a little more open minded to the fact that there's a process that God knows what he's doing if you're following God's leading trust he'll take care of things and you're not damaged goods and it's not all over with and you don't need to be afraid of future relationships just because the 1st one didn't work out and I wish more people knew that because a lot of people are hurting so bad right now who were well intended and it just didn't work what you learned through that process was you were both were following God's leading and God made it clear through that process that this was going to work long term you know and you were honoring God through the process you're not a loser you're not a failure I wish more people knew that which I could hope people who've gone through that through the last phase basically end up leading to healing thankfully and the most recent phase in with another situation that God brought something across my path that I felt totally unworthy of and was fighting hoof and claw that I don't deserve this and I want as many details about that situation but I. I went through a scenario where literally I was wrestling God and told him I don't I don't deserve this this person's way out of my league I don't stand a chance not understanding that God wanted to bless me and and I've only go so far as you know whatever I do conversation with Neville Peters tell them about the situation is person I've met and they will said Brother let me ask you a question because I told this girl where to my leaders has let me ask you a question are you giving the desires of your heart to God and never thinking of myself the heart is really wicked deceitful above all things you know like I'm trying to kind of you know those are that's called fig leaves of piety right you're trying to cover your sinfulness with religion and the real issue is so I say I don't care what I want like what I want like was that matter I just want to God once but here's the issue guys what if God wants to bless me what if God wants to put me in a scenario that's better than what I feel I deserve and I had to deal with that and God wrestled so tenaciously with me for months to accept the fact that I could be loved and accepted by this person and that he wanted to bless me and it was always a hard scenario for me to get to and the same thing is happening with my job when you've been working at the poverty level in ministry for a long time there is this since the Stockholm syndrome in singleness. And loneliness and the Stockholm Syndrome is basically you finding sympathy for your captors right this is why people stay in abusive relationships and so in that situation. I was kind of in this abusive thought life not good enough not lovable never going to be less necessary my life because all the bad stuff that's happened but also happen with my job so I'm offered a job that's going to pay more than I've ever made and get benefits and I'm trying to find ways to excuse myself from the calling of God in my life because their blessings I don't feel I deserve because I had a very negative thought life because all of what I went through and understand how bad it was and I needed friends and other people to speak truth into my life to help me to see what I wasn't seeing so I getting counsel can be so helpful and so I knew I had a friend sister went into one of our colleges went to a fitness center and my friend's sister I told I don't even know I told her but I told her kind of what was going on and I told you guys don't you worry about the situation with this girl or with this job and the girl literally said to me could you not think that way and I was so grateful she said that like I needed to be shaken and it literally guys was if God is telling me I'm not going to let you go into you let me bless you God literally brought me through this area to help me see these things and I was going to risk all that scenario but here's the point what God's been showing me about the reason behind my waiting 1st of all I had idols in my experience I was desperate to be loved and accepted by a woman because all the stuff from my mom and there were strong holes that I was running to to numb that pain of loneliness and so forth they were causing me problems and God had to show me the root structures because the easy thing in Adventism is hey we know what stuff is bad to do on the outside don't eat this don't worry that don't do that the problem is we very rarely talk about why people do what they do. And there on it thing is we back in the medical industry for being drug dealers with a health message they're looking for root causes there's give them drugs that help them with their with their blood pressure whatever you have the problems we do the same thing with behavior modification we'll deal with the root issues we shame people for bad behavior God doesn't work that way God doesn't use shame and sometimes when you're in these situations were in tears you're begging God to take a sin out of your life and it doesn't leave your warning of God is even real Sometimes the reason that happens is because God knows taking the sin of your life won't cause your problems to go away sin isn't the issue there's a pain in your life that you're running to that sin to numb God wants to deal with the pain because you know what happens when you heal of your pain you no longer need the pain pills Jesus did this regularly throughout his ministry he didn't shame people for their behavior he went in on the root issues that underlie their bad behavior and that brought them their freedom and so there were certain things like God Why is this still here like why is this why am I being this selfish why would being this impatient want to be whatever and God showed me here's why my parodies were wrong it was more important to be loved and accepted by a woman than to understand my true security my identity in Christ as a minister of the gospel I was sincere wasn't unconverted But when you got brokenness in your life from family that stuff doesn't go away easy guys can haunt you for life if you don't deal with it and God did not want my future wife to have to deal with that or my kids to deal with that and God kept me from entering the promised land into we dealt with the stuff God promised me marriage but God tell me way to deal with these things 1st and it's only for her benefit if I don't even really do it for my sake I should do it for hers and for the sake of my children and so God can't bring me through that I codependency issues fixing peoples a lot easier than dealing with my own brokenness right minister is easy because everybody else has problems I was a ministry for 5 years before I realized my own problems. I wish someone would have told me well they kind of did but I just made excuses and so I went through a situation where God brought a counsellor friend of mine into my life and he came to my house one day and it just I'd never met the guy before I invited to my house for lunch because I knew was in the area and a friend told me to get to know this guy and the guy said something he said every addiction we have in our lives is seeking to numb pain that we're feeling and immediately I knew that whatever this guy was saying is what I've been looking for my whole life but I don't know what to do about it and so then I had a logical question get worse the pain never saw a counselor never cried myself to sleep do you think God knew or the origins of my pain was yet do you think God wanted me to know where the origin of my pain was yet now am I to a point where I want to give God permission to show me yes I wasn't there before I was in denial about my pain and so they were able to go in and show me all the stuff and I kid you not guys it was like someone yanked back the shower curtain and I saw a deal I'd never seen before and there was a desperately lonely and broken man living inside of me and I didn't know so I was very needy and my communications with the 1st pursuit was very needy and might in my communications with the most recent pursuit didn't understand how broken I was or what I was dealing with but once you go all in the process of finding healing man God just drop in info on you all the time it's not because you're a loser is because you want you to be free and if you're willing to be set free goal do it then totally will do it so warm in here but I don't actually know these things a little more complicated than what my paygrade can handle so I'm going to turn it left because I think that's cold well to see what happens. I was recently feelings of unworthiness self-hatred and it is it was unhealthy I very unhealthy thought life because of what I've gone through all the rejection all the difficulty now here's the issue the Bible says that I'm to love my neighbor as myself and I said in the 50 the small thing when Eric Waltz is preaching maybe as Dr Jackson I forget. But the Bible says on the love my neighbors myself ask yourself a question how would I treat my neighbors if I treated them like I treat me in my thought life and in my belief structures it would be pretty I know about you but for me it would be pretty here's the thing I was more than willing to give and give and give for other people but I felt that I didn't deserve to receive it there were also serves or blessings without me I was disqualifying myself from this stuff and I didn't realize it and remember Andrew Peterson a singer songwriter he was telling some one of his the things he was going through and he told them. Andrew you know that self hatred is really just a form of self worship There's awkward pause and he says so we're not friends anymore and ever laughs He says I'm just kidding but isn't there truth to that you know if you're so busy hating yourself you're hating the one that Jesus loves and if we're hating the one that Jesus loves There we're not spending the time we need to on showing that love to the people around us were focused on us so in so much time hating me instead of loving the one that God gave me to love and something I had to come to terms with the fact terms with was the fact that loneliness is an invitation to respond to the love that are already have in Christ when you're wrestling with feelings of loneliness and I do a lot of traveling ministry in a studies except travel alone so you're giving giving giving doing for everybody else but you receive very little because your job is to give but it's very rare that I have people the ministry said NG who just want to come in give him bless me because I think people are parasites That's why when there is to give and I find with doing it I have no problem in doing it but there have been less probably than less than a handful of situations in my life where someone has pulled me aside and said Brother How are you doing how can I pray for you and can I pray for you right now. And 5 times are the same guy and I cried both times. Because there's a sense of ministry where there's always giving giving giving we don't receive as much and it can happen and so I had to come to terms of the fact that my moments when I feel lonely are an invitation for me to go to the other one who can feel me and to remind myself of the fact that I'm already loved I'm already accepted and there's actually never a time in which I'm actually alone now I can know that intellectually right that Jesus is everywhere Jesus is enough but I tell you what man when the rubber meets the road of actually believing that on the inside it's hard it's hard I preach the gospel all over this country begging people with tears and tears of sincerity I'm not lying to people to believe the love that God has for them and I want their process this summer away to go into the situation it was way better than I ever would have asked for myself and God told me because I want to settle down guys travel life is killing me I'm exhausted I've lost weight and talk to Brother limit about that this morning and he had to come to terms of that too and I just it's not good for me to have this much travel without getting the chance to actually exercise never regular schedule eat regular meals and healthy food and God convicted me so heavily this summer he said I could sell you I could but the reason why have you traveling around the country sharing the same messages with people because it's very similar messages everywhere I go the reason why I keep having to do this because Son you don't believe what you're saying. You don't believe it and wasn't lying to people I believed in the process of salvation but I didn't believe in this area of my life with a was so much brokenness in relationships in family and intimacy and stuff like that and God told me the reason why you keep doing this is because you don't believe what you're saying in this area of your life. I could sell you but I need you to believe this so I had to die to myself and I had to choose to believe what God believe about me and it's a process guys there's a process in success if you're willing to commit to it it happens guys I'm finding so much freedom in the last 12 months I can't even tell you this last pursuit literally has raised me from the dead literally raised me from the dead changed my life I'm able to hope again in this area of my life for the 1st time in who knows how long it's changed my life so here's the promise is that God's given me about my true and full identity in Him Now you can take pictures of this or you can just come up here and all are after the fact and I will give you my e-mail address. And you can e-mail me and I'll send you my slides in the audio from both these presentations because my story went longer than I had anticipated and how much as it is HILL I hope it was helpful but these promises are a bunch of references anyway so be very easy to go through this fairly quickly but you can take pictures of these if you like but I'll give you my slides you can have them OK whatever you want because this is part of what I've had to do to go through a process of changing the way I think is kind of called cognitive behavioral therapy you're right you're basically taking your broken thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ you're taking the false thoughts to Jesus and replacing them with true thoughts and so every single morning I have a document on my phone a lot document in the Notes section of my phone filled with promises. Directly tailored to my brokenness the battles on facing the battles I'm losing the promises that God has made to me and every single day all it's just verbatim scriptures and spread across the quotes that's it no commentary just verses and the references just spit speed across a quote in the references every single day a ling the truth as it is in Jesus before Jesus claiming that promise and to Jesus as in John Chapter 17 over 17 he says Father same defy them by your truth your word is truth and I always thought of this in the context of devotions but I didn't understand that there's great power in praying the word back to God not just reading it it's you taking action upon the Word of God not just receiving it and since I began doing that in August last year every day every single day another man I was back in unbelieving more truth than I was then I have more hope in my life in these areas of brokenness than I did then God is changing my life I was a dead man I was converted I loved Jesus was fully committed to ministry but I was hurting guys in a dark place and Jesus they use all this process to literally raise me from the dead so this is a cautious tootin you are complete in him already guys you don't need a woman to complete you ladies you don't need a man to complete you and others not ladies here but presentations to whoever wants them only Jesus can complete you only Jesus. Accept or 17 in Him I live and move and have my being and if he says Chapter One we're told that we're already excepted in the beloved already and I had to keep reminding myself of these truths and so in time I get those moments of discouragement or loneliness or impatience while waiting on God's promises to be fulfilled I go back to these 3 scriptures and I pray them back to him multiple times if I have to and I just remind God of the promises he's made to me. And what it does is it brings a sense of stillness and peace in my life that is 1st and last handful of days like there is just this abiding sense of peace I want to pray any more for certain things God told me I've heard you now just are praising me for them to do in your life man praises a whole nother level healing. Since Psalm 73 who have I in heaven but you and then it says and there is none upon the earth that I desire Besides you could you say that in truth if not pray that Jesus is a Jesus make this true in my life that there's no one and if I desire beside you God is a strength of my heart and he is my portion forever King David says some 732526 some 63 because your loving kindness is better than life my lips shall praise you thus I will bless you while I live I will lift up my hands in your name and then it says my soul shall be satisfied as with Marilyn fat Innes and I Mel shall praise you a joyful lips you can be satisfied in God That doesn't mean that you don't have to you're not going to have a desire for relationships you can have that but the point is you don't need that I don't need anybody ever you have no idea how healing that is never You've lived a very needy life when you've been filled with brokenness I don't need a woman I desire to have a wife but I don't need one you know see the difference because my identity is only found in Christ not in her doesn't mean you don't love him doesn't mean I'll support them that doesn't mean they are there for them but only Jesus can give me my true identity so 142 you are my refuge and you are my portion in the land of the Living God as the Great in chief price he is one that brings more worth than her present value Isaiah 26 the desire of our souls for your name and for the remembrance of you and with my soul I have desired you in the night has your soul longed for a god in the same way that is longing for companionship and in those moments a longing for companionship have you stopped and said you know what Jesus was just focus on us. Let me just focus on this I know that your timing is right I know your promise is true bliss is focus on this right now and what happens is you're no longer putting a yoke upon your future spouse that they're never going to be able to handle because if you're worth your happiness and your purpose is tied to a person that person fails you you get mad and you get mad at them for no reason you get mad at them for still going under a low that they never should have had to carry shame on you and that's not fair to them they deserve better than that your wife deserves better than to be your source of security your wife deserves better than to be your source of identity and your husband and so forth male and female and so when we have the security in crisis far easier for us to give people grace when they fail us because I don't need them I love them and I committed my life to living for them but I don't need them and so when they stumble it allows me to find compassion and love and forgiveness for them in patience and say the getting on to them for stumbling into seeing the difference big big difference and it isn't because God doesn't want companionship we're going to get to that in our 2nd seminar but guys are our compass on who we truly are and where we're going it has to start with God If it doesn't you're setting yourself up for heartbreak and that's a yoke that women should have to bear those men should have to bear. So these are a bunch of promises that I claimed before before God every day 10 promises said one of the things he recommends in his prayer seminar is to lay 10 promises before God every day. And so I did Proverbs 1312 Proverbs 1822 as if 402931 Romans 42021 Hebrews 103539 Psalm 271-3214 John 162224 Proverbs 312-935-1819 Genesis 218-2324 I used to say them all by memory of my prayer walks to Jesus but I'm not going to do that right now she's too much time but I stored these promises in my heart and I just can't claim in the Lord you promised me that you're going to provide in this area of my life and I'm going to remind you of the promises you've made to me and I'm telling you I believe them I believe what you said and I'm going to keep waiting into you Dewey said every single day every means before the Lord. And then once you do this when this problem is that God makes to you hold him to that and these have been very helpful for me Isaiah 55110 man so I say if he's actually Isaiah says. He says Social my word be that goes forth my mouth it shall not return to Me void but it shall accomplish what I please and show prosper the thing for which I sent it he's not lying to you guys when Jesus makes a promise to provide in an area of your life you can take it to the bank when that happens is none of your business but what happens is your business and claiming that promise and believing in Jesus every step of the way trust him you can take it to the bank someone 26 I love this one those who so in tears show reap enjoy He who continually goes forth weeping burying seed for sowing shall doubtless without doubt come again with rejoicing bringing his sheaves with him. He times I've said that verse in tears to God more time than I want to confess publicly Romans 55 but here's the point guys this situation in Gaza brought me through the last 12 months has put me in a situation to be able to hope again for the 1st time in a long time. And these are verses on Hope Hope firearms 5 now hope does not disappoint because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us amen someone 19 up hold me according to your word that I may live end do not let me be ashamed of my hope Lord don't let me be ashamed of my hope 1st of these 910 he who plows should plow in hope you said and he who threshers and hope should be partaker of his hope glaciers 69 were told Let us not grow we will doing good for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart don't quit if God made a promise to you don't give up don't give up Abraham waited 25 years guys but God was faithful and God gave him something better than what he demands and just think about this guys think about this God spoke to me directly a few years ago with this very promise the idea of Abraham every time Abraham looked in the eyes of Isaac he was reminded of the faithfulness of God Isaac was a living and breathing reminder to Abraham that there's a God in heaven who is real a God in heaven who is faithful a God in heaven who has never failed me even when it felt like he failed me all the pain he forgot about I think I had that verse later in John Chapter 16 where yeah I do it and it was in the 2nd presentation where Jesus says there's a time separation coming is going to devastate you guys but it's for your good and then she says equates this separation to childbirth he says a woman when she's in labor has sorrow because her hour has come but then he says whenever the child comes for she forgets or sorrow for joy that a child is born into the world she forgets all the pain she went through when the child is here Abraham forgot it too and he says in this joy will be yours in your joy Jesus says no man can take from you will make him take it from you Abraham had that every time he looked a son in the eyes he was reminded of the faith of this of God. We did all these OK. And this is one of my favorite Romans 1513 now made that God of hope you know that we serve a God of hope who wants you to have hope and May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing and that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit I claim this every day guys Jesus I think you for bringing hope back into my life don't listen take it from me so here's my question because this is a hard one are you willing to lay the promises of God on the altar and tell him that you are the most important thing in my life nothing else is more important mean in Jesus if this thing is becoming too important to me I willing to lay it on the altar and if God in His great mercy were to give that promise back to you and your to keep it are you going to do what Abraham did and what Hannah did do with it as you please and committed to his service just imagine all Hannah wanted was a son she's weeping in church inquietude the precinct kids are being drunk she is no I'm just I'm just praying it will be the Lord hear your quest God gives her a son if this is all you've dreamed about and God really hit me with this one if this is all you dreamed about and all you desire because of whatever you've gone through in life when God gives it to you Are you willing to consecrate it to service for him are you willing to give it back to him we're going to get yours and run away finally he and run away I pledge to God This is a mine is going to be yours and I'll use it for your service Lord all on are you I promised him my wife will not be mine she'll be yours I'll order it and we will do this for you enough for me and Lord Jesus I want to believe that and I want to live that because topic is too important even to be the case for you it's been a few messages I've listened to they've actually all been non Adventists resources ironically. Served by Timothy Keller to service by God from transformation church Michael something I can remember last name and. It's served by Charles Stanley and they've been super helpful me the topic of waiting if you like the links for those I'm happy to send them to you in the email in fact just remind me they'll do that though that even super helpful resources. But one of things the guy made that Michael made from transformation church was a big one he made this point to how you wait directly affects how long you wait or that the Bible look at the nation of Israel they were impatient they weren't trusting what God said and they kept causing problems guys how you weigh directly affects how long you wait I spent 5 years trying to change another person's head looking at my own brokenness sorry I did that I wish I could apologize to that person I made other mistakes in life which is a lack of do about that but I tell you what once I realized I've been wrong I'm not going back Jesus deserves better than that once I see what I've done wrong I want to make it right and I want to grow I want to find healing I want to do this in a way that honors God but how you wait directly affects how long you wait to listen to this John Chapter 12 verse 24 Jesus says Most assuredly I say to you that unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies how does it remain alone I believe one of the reasons why we find ourselves in seasons of singleness is because we haven't died there are things that we need to die to that we need to leave at the feet of Jesus and to be healed from so that we can be in a situation in a healthy place to receive the blessings that God wants to give us says that unless a grain of wheat falls on the ground and dies it remains alone but if it dies it produces much grain and I know certainly God spoke to me about this I can't speak for you I don't know your story I don't know your background they may not be the case God may have something else in mind I can tell you for me that was one of them I refused to die I want to God's promises on my terms I one of the now it's I'm tired of waiting and so I waited longer and I hurt people while I waited and I'm sorry I wish I didn't wish I could have that back. Here's the good news guys God does long to give you the desires of your heart he does but the desires of your heart are the desires that are in harmony with how God operates some of us what we think of the desires of our heart I believe the way that God defines the desire of your heart is based upon the you knowing what he knows now what you want are you with me the truth because God wants to honor the true desires of your heart not the superficial weak views of the desires of our heart and the true desire of our heart is to be fully known and fully loaded in Christ before we ever know a person. God does desire to give you the desires of your heart in the villa had it had to grill me on this Neville said Look brother you doing this is like knowledge his brothers of a single thing I don't tell God what I want for my wife what I want for my son the things I want for my stepson for my ministry the things that scare me he says I tell God everything is and I'd like to tell you what to do but I would strongly encourage you to give the desires of your heart to God and I started that a year ago just over 12 months ago there were 4 things only before God That night 1234 to me I could tell you what they were and I saw the hand of God working in every single one of those areas guys those 4 things now become 6 things and I'm coming to realize that one of the reasons why I wasn't given the desires of my heart to God is because I hated myself I've been hurt so many times I didn't feel that I was worthy enough I felt I was a lovable that I didn't deserve them and God had to bring me to a point to be willing to hope again and when you're willing to pray and hope in faith stuff happens guys Jesus says with faith the size of a mustard seed you can move a mountain well tell you what had a big mountain in my heart in my mind it was negative core beliefs negative self talk stinking thinking whatever you want to call it had a big mountain and the only way that I could get out of that was by God bringing me to a situation that challenged my core beliefs. That situation's out of my league guess what it's yours begin to take it the jobs out of my league guess what it's yours we take it God had to put me in situations and overwhelm with encourage me to challenge the lies I was believing about myself and what God wanted for my future and when that happened I started to find healing I started to think differently I started to live my life in harmony with the things that God believed about me instead of what I thought about me and things started to change and are changing and I'm finding healing and growing every day as a result of this and praise God for that I can't claim any of it it's a goodness of God He was in some 21st for May he grant you according to your heart's desire and fulfill your purpose some 212 you've given him his heart's desire and you've not withheld the request of his lips to listen to this one some 37 verses 45 delight yourself also in your spouse delight yourself also in being free from singleness delight yourself also in your job and what it says says delight yourself also in the Lord and when that happens he can give you the desires of your heart the Texas will we are complete and content in God it's now safe to give us those blessings who will make an idol out of it he's a jealous god guys in for good reasons commit your way to the Lord trust also in him and he'll bring it to pass he's promised that guys he longs to give you the desires of your heart and if you knew what he knew those are the things you would ask for and that's what he means I believe and so this is the last point the pastor Mike makes in his sermon that just. Man he says the only thing harder than waiting on God is wishing that you had come here testified to that you know the heart of the Waiting on God is wishing that you would wait on God I've been there there are some apologies I wish I could give right now. Some of us we need to do that I could send an e-mail I guess that's what I need to do. But the way this is this is again the topic of the weight of waiting and it's a heavy load sometimes isn't it Abraham can testify to that Isaacson to be chill I don't know how he did it. Jacob that he wrestled you almost wonder because you have been in situations where you know what God wants but there's variables that don't fall into place and you feel like I don't do something nothing will happen because it seems like they are falling apart you're in situations like this and I tell you what they one of the most convicting thoughts in the world to me is what would have happened if for Becca and Jacob waited and said to deceiving their husband and dad what would have happened because I feel like that's me I was impatient what would have happened if I'd actually waited on God and better I don't know because I do know God makes all things new and his promise to do so is true and it's faith what's a scripture says and he can make good things even other bad things and he can redeem the time that's been lost he says he can redeem with the locus of even restore the locus of it and I believe that I believe in a God of 2nd 3rd 4th 5th and 6th chances and here's why I don't believe a relational predestination but what I do believe is God does have someone in mind for you and God will provide and the very person God would provide for his who you would want for you if you know what he knew but we're waiting on him we'll let God make that choice or will you settle I talk to kids in academies all the time most relationship to happen in our boarding schools and academies are relationships of convenience it's the best option on campus also the for that or the best option on campus your boys are already dating or even have a no dating policy so I'll take that one because it's the next best thing. You laugh man but most relationships in these academies are relationships of convenience and it no no they are like this picturesque couple Yeah and they do get to southern and you never calls or get why it's more fish in the sea. Right you're making decisions based upon what you see instead of baseball what God sees don't settle guys don't settle Don't sell yourself short God has blessings for you relationally emotionally spiritually God wants to bless you but are you settling because you're impatient so worth it the problem is you don't hurting people in your impatience not just you but other people right and it's not worth it and so I committed the fact that Lord only you know what I need and wait on you to provide it and I tell you what men are in a situation a year ago that I didn't know someone that existed so if God can do that God can do anything and I don't know what I don't know God's doing but I do know this much there out there and you can wait and all wait whatever he's got mine for me all do that whatever that is whoever it is whatever it is I will God wants but he made it clear to me a year ago there out there they do exist and tell you what mean you won't regret it God has someone out there that will make you happy they will make you better what you do in the name of Jesus will be a blessing to you but will you wait on him while you wait. Are you guys praying God in heaven I think you that you love us more than that we hate ourselves. Lord you love us more than anything that we love and I just pray that we would believe that today that we would have braced that truth today and that you would fill our hearts and our minds with the truth as it is and Jesus that you truly are enough that doesn't mean that you desire for us to stay in a single state but you truly are enough for us and so I pray you to help us to better understand these principles as we get into our 2nd similar after this of talking about specific topic of. When it's not good for man to be alone Lord help us help us to see clearly and Lord Jesus I just pray that you would heal us of our brokenness you'd open our eyes that we'd be able to find the freedom in the peace that only you can give they would find the security in the identity that you long to give us and that your will reign supreme God I pray for those young women who are waiting God I pray that you would bless them I pray for the young men who are waiting that you would bless them in that you give them patience that you give them the willingness to wait for your perfect provision and that I pray that they would recognize that moment of your provision that everything else that they were seeking for themselves before then. They were settling and you got something good in store for them thank you Lord we asked these things of Jesus to. Him in this media was brought to you by audio 1st a website dedicated to spreading God's word through free sermon audio and much more if you would like to know more about audio verse or if you would like to listen to more sermon leave a Visit W W W dot audio verse or.

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