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Overcoming Addictions

Alan Parker

Presenter

Alan Parker

Professor of missions and evangelism and director of Pierson Institute of Evangelism at Southern Adventist University

Conference

Recorded

  • January 1, 2010
    10:45 AM
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all right we are going to be talking about addictions particularly and so my name is Alan Potter on this thread seven and I was not supposed to be presenting but because of Janice Watson not being well I can't escape into into the place and the sun to beat him to be talking about the realities of addictions trying figure out based on some of the things that we've shared our how do we handle addictions ourselves because just about everybody I know is addicted and the other is a lie and so addiction is ready of a problem we all face but before we get into a discussion of addictions once you value his with me for what to pray for God we want to thank you that you have called us not just to be Christians but to be heels so many of us have discovered the pain of not finding healing Lord we have scrambled between wanting to know you for who you really are and yet feeling frustrated by how sinful humanness help us not to come up with just a typical human answer but to experience the reality of your grace we ask these things in Jesus name amen I think most of us would understand the concept of secret shame it on until cannot do things we never talk about when we become Christians especially Seventh-day Adventist Christians we like to put on a mask is it you want to mask to judge you know you wanted to show it since they comes the holiness may you won't care how is your brother by you and I'm fine you know my grandmother died this rebound by you and we put on these mass because we don't want other people to see what's really inside and the mask represents out happy holy face infected of the story was told by some he worked in the White House he told me that Bill Clinton when they decided to play a prank on people who were coming to the White House and as they were walking in anyone was shaking his head with its own knows how you missed the president and in and save a little speech and in a job that he would sometimes say things like I'm having a terrible day how about you and they wouldn't even know it because there is so scripted to be happy and and being of anyone as one of whom is the president is dynamically gone how do we deal with the reality of my life that we can never face with going on inside and so we blunts to play the game to say the right words to say the right things and insight honesty when we witness a seminar you know that we are going to deal with Shane most of us into a shantytown and adherence is enough of a crowd unit would feel better we can all be shameful together shed happens in our lives and it is become secrets we don't admitted to other people but secretly in alliance there is a secret shame and we need to figure out what to do with that secret shame I been reading a book called inside outs by Larry Crabb and in that book he covers a student who just one time in a few minutes was exposed to pornography he happened to be a flipping through channels and there was something that had pornography on it and he got so fascinated by that became an addiction just a momentary glimpse and Sonny took over his life and Harry was a finally a bright young person he was determined to find out and yet he had the secret shame the secrets then that was holding them back from God wanted him to be and he was struggling so how did this take over my life and what it suggests that the real problem is not just a behavior it goes deeper than that and so we made a deal with more than behavior today we need to take a look at what is really driving us to the secret sense of oneness and addictions with forcible need to answer the question what is an addiction what is an addiction and addiction anyone want to tell me what addiction is a now repeated what is an addiction something if you keep craving well you know I I keep craving food every day -year-old niece twice a day I crave for food does that make it an addiction it might be it depicts you it's compulsive behavior even when it's not good for you I I like the definition enslavement to a hazardous substance personal thing and the inability to break free even when you realize that it is harming you and you had an addiction I have some bugs to let you know what I'm talking about there are things that we get addicted to sometimes it's simple you know it it may be that you get addicted to chocolate glaze now I'm not saying a related get addicted to chocolate but I have not ladies to walk on one campus I used to live at Leeds on Africa that's it my accidents from that's one African-American and slick so I I know some ladies who walked three miles to get chocolates and then but that's often says that the original tree of the knowledge of good and evil anything was an Apple hanging is his know was a chocolate treat that's why it was so attractive so what we have are simple things sometimes but they still control allies that they become an addiction and you can have an addiction not only to a habit but it can be a substance that can be good it can be you can be something odd that you would just store and take a candy cigarettes alcohol it can be a person in any women on somebody in an addictive relationship it's haunting them but they can't stop it can be a pain it can be something like pornography on the Internet it's the thing that you are addicted to that you can stop you out when you realize this is not good for me you know like the little same once you pop you can stop right and sellers what happens is you start down the path and it will likewise already started the site as well enjoy myself any of you ever been in that kind of situation and so we get into addictive cycles and in order to understand that cycle he has a common one is we can understand where redemption comes from if we understand the aspect of shame so that's for instance take a drive nicotine oncology is the start of a textbook you have gratification it makes you feel better but when you take the drugs the alcohol of the nicotine it needs to shame and that simply adds to your unaddressed long-term pain that long-term pain then on a confluence that you have an unfulfilling personal life that needs you to be more stressed and anxious and the most stressed and anxious to become the will you go back to the thing that gives you gratification that makes you feel better but the more you do the thing that makes you feel better the drug alcohol and nicotine for instance the more you experience shame the more you have a long-term unaddressed pain and then you have and unfulfilling postal life it just means you feel I really am a failure if I can do well in this guy really can't do well in anything that any reasonable stress anxiety and will stress anxiety you feel the more you want to whiskey and so you escape into that may well be as this process escape shame pain I know good sense of failure as an escape particularly right before exams provide on a campus I noticed that addictive behaviors get a whole lot worse it said a movement and its exam week let's move into southern campus where and they will know that because they know it's almost like you are heated up for it because you are not dealing with something now this is to be critical for how to understand addictions because addictions are not a behavioral issue everybody there on that they are not a behavioral issue you don't think so addictions just by fixing your behavior something else is going on yet it has to do with your shame and your long-term paying suggests on traditional ways to deal with addictions and maybe I you have someone shared this with you you're just not serious enough to have to work hard erratic so let's change behavior so the problem the reason why you are having this problem is you haven't done these behaviors so we do these behaviors do they work know you try to behaviors doesn't work then you know what your problem is not doing enough of spiritual activities of your depraved moral purity spent more time in Bible study this wouldn't happen so the person goes that they take up the Bible thinks that it boggles like crazy and right after that cause the Bible 's the addictive behavior comes back what's going on here see it's not simply a matter of doing changing behaviors what we have instead when we tried these behavioral activities is we have increasing guilt and frustration and the more guilty accountable like a lot to this day to the very advent of behavior that you can't overcome it and if they were far away so this is a continuous cycle and beheading or listened a little to fix it and the Bible never suggest if you just change these behaviors you make everything right the Bible has a much more fundamental way of dealing with the problem of addiction then there's the other side of the worry about it we got anything until Jesus comes in also though I don't feel guilty we all do it you know everybody's in the same barbiturates that are on the set of frames along but this tends to only lead to avoidance and a numbing of the pain that actually leads you into so you see these people in Hollywood on a oil stressed out over the bad addictive behaviors know they're having a good thought how you doing narrow you know sliding together on the road down to health but they're all having a fun time as they do it but inside they are empty have you ever felt that sense of emptiness that comes when you ignore the hidden pain and one nights in red home alone is the people 's freedoms the computer died with the virus praise the Lord and suddenly you're a long and you realize I'm empty inside and that emptiness is what is being driving those addictions all along to the real problem is we don't understand how hidden this their office inside of us then drive us to certain activities and behaviors if we could understand out the best we can understand why we keep filling it up with these addictive behaviors those behaviors are feeding out those in inadequate ways but they feed out this and I don't understand what tries us to benediction we tend to just try and tropical fruit change the behavior without changing the roots and units the root that is at the heart of this and the root is feeding the behaviors you ever gone into a store shopping when you're hungry yet bad idea why that looks good that looks good that was cannot think that I'll take it wow how did I end up with all the secluded because you are hungry everything looked good you understand the principle here when you have a deep system inside of you you will be continuously absorbing behaviors of feedback that is the real problem is not the products it's the slowest and if you could really develop your list then it would change how you shop for the products so you know what you have to do to eat before you got shopping because they don't feel like buying a fruit fly command you to skip that skip that it helps you to know what you really need instead of just simply what you design and that's what makes the difference with addictions so how do we get down to the roots instead of the fruits most of us are being driven by our sewage for happiness for popularity what do other people think about me when we go to church instead of money how much of it is about what God thinks of us and how much is it about what is everybody else can I say about me and so we going to judge we are driven into the church by our addictive compulsive desires to be popular and it's often like reaching for something that will send us over the edge so understand this I wanted to introduce to you like a concept from the book inside out and he deals with three levels of significance the most important one is right in the middle that is your spiritual put I was going to open a crucial longing on a asked the question in the USA Today they said if you could ask one question of God or a higher power what would it be visiting when he know what the answer would be that what is my purpose in life God what is my purpose in life the central driving question thank you little bit Internet feels wonderful the driving question that most of us face is what is my put some life that we can discover a second aspect Ms. a relational site now the first one is crucial you can't live without a purpose the second one is still critical is not crucial but it is critical and that is your relational meet no man is an island 's it is not good for a person to be alone would you will agree we need relationships we need to belong to other people to connect to other people and so this is really the second level of significance and this is at the level that makes us feel significant and this is your physical needs and is a multinational abuses desire for food desire for status desire more casual audience you know for your physical being but what happens is most people live this the other way around where did I put the emphasis on the physical if I can have good foods if I cannot appease my sexual desires if I can you don't feel good look good in my own eyes be healthy then I'm pretty happy if I'm healthy and I can have some my desires met and have chocolates for related cake I am going to be happy and my life and I flew pretty good anywhere as long as you feel good yeah we don't worry as much about this level and we certainly tend to ignore the outlet and so we live our lives on that album labeled the outer layer of significance with his physical desires being mixed so when it lost addictions take by on the physical level but mad some of us are more relational and so even though we get the physical side made we had been relational need and we want to have a young relationship and so people attend without I need a boyfriend or girlfriend I said no you don't need a boyfriend girlfriend you want a boyfriend or girlfriend and right now that's not a good idea because you want to the state view of the data that this because of the makeup where we going out where we don't can you just give me suspect this have you ever been with this because you like your my world I worship you you are my everything I do what I did before you exist that you are alive but somehow you are so caught up in that addictive relationship we had atoned for at the psychological codependency when you become dependent on the other person you both addicted to each other and to other things to satisfy your in the first one book of love is a choice cut a piece of this way it says you have to love a cup 's that all you parents moms love to dance leapt up they marry each other and then you get born in a poor in a poor into your laptop down here below so that pouring into your laptop and your taking in they love to know what happens if mom and dad don't have a whole lot of love that outpouring in a letter left at your laptop what does that leave you empty dusty and so you have this listing laptop and then you find someone else with an empty love and the two left cups meet each other and there is temporary exhilaration as they discover that the other person is really attracted to them because they are both white men Agnes coming towards each other to Internet and is a feeling that sending my laptop as well because they think that the other person is to meet this need and so there is a temporary elevation on love levels but it just like you know so the pop it's not the real thing just comes up and then I comes again about after a while because that's still both those he wasn't the real thing they left cups quickly drain and they start demanding of the other person feel my life cap but the other was intentionally left out because they running on empty and so they get all frustrated with each other at any mental block you I hate you I'm in love with you I need you at my IQ that will apply I need you to come back to get up a new non- asked that question we had this desperate desire inside of our lives with someone else because we don't this be everybody clear on that point solenoid to understand addictions we need to deal with the problem of Phyllis and God has a way of helping us deal with that and you may not like his method and can attend you what it is what God does is eat she takes away the things that are masking a real plus so we lose the politico you know suddenly we had been help you get sick of you notice how you willing to follow the book councils on diets and foods when you sick because they realize hey man I better get wise my life right I want to be sick anymore sickness motivates you to go deeper so we lose the physical sometimes we may lose the relational you been dating this person it masks your hidden thirst at a God says you know what I've been working with them and they don't break up with you he sang I got I need them but they getting healthy and the only way for you to get help used to break up and so you have this break up into separate and is a loss of relationships the northerly this better in the spiritual desire that in a desire that can only be met by God and it isn't enough the list because in many ways what's happening inside of us is that we are thirsty now USA what this have to do with addictions everything is everything to do with addictions because what's happening inside of you we could get the water level in a moment is that you are thirsty for something that the world cannot meet that you remember the story of the woman at the well wireless yet the well to get somewhat right and that what the day was yet the well about and you have a goldfish water at noon not why not because this is not like going to the aforesaid and funny you have to look outside of town in a hot heat of the day you have to lower down and get the water and the need to put on your shoulders and you'll go to walk back this long distance back to the village why would anyone do that in the middle of the day why she is a shank she is ashamed of what people would think of her because she has had five husbands and the one she's living with now is just on attempt we base this season evangelistic prospect and so what happens is she's there and she believes she is looking for water and Jesus has this whole dialogue about water without we don't have time to go into today but this whole dialogue about whatever it has been dealing with the concept of water he tells a lot I told you I needed a drink and I just need physical water but really what you need is the water of eternal life you need everlasting one just like we can I don't get this United Auto Workers I don't like making the walking out of town every day she doesn't get it right how did she react she thinks he's talking about the external thanks now let me tell you when I told about addictions I thought to not some people just turn off like I already have been in others I'm feeling pretty good because you don't realize the deepness of your best the deepness of your post is so deep that we want to mask it I think you know what I really feel like right now I feel like chocolates will know it's not about chocolate inside of you is something much deeper that's thirsty and that's what the woman in real life she thought she was just physically thirsty but she had at this something deep down inside of her and when he touched that when he got through the she realize what I've been looking for is a savior to soon I been looking for somebody who will follow my life the great mass of mankind are engrossed in the things on what this life and divine truth can find no abiding place in the hearts and get all the blessings which the well can you have failed to satisfy the what the wants of the sole reason and of those there is a nameless longing for something which they had not at peace and rest that is not born Auburn NY Tribune Herald favorite twenty eight eighteen eighty two so while I saying here is that we will have an endless money know what's in it was funny and you ever had a nameless longing I'm to give an illustration that was given to me that works really well imagine that you been out mowing on a hot day and you walked into a walk and your house and you remember that you have an ice cold jar of lemonade in your refrigerator you hit was a refrigerated mom calls is a habit of doing this just when you're on your way to do something important that you pick up the fall you begin chatting to a high lot Monday it's great and then after you finish adding to her he put the phone down and now you can't remember why you came in there in the first place and saw you looking around with around one are you experiencing a nameless longing and then at last say hey what a particular refrigerant he opened the refrigerator door NBC the ice cold John her own women and already I can see that you wanting this you take it out you pour it in show put it down you hold it up to about what book have you satisfied with this yes now most people when you ask them do you have a nameless longing than a bit ago yeah but I the I don't know they have a sense of restlessness and again Saturday night restlessness you know you just like I want to do something but I know what it is any people solder it and it still doesn't add up a can of Smith and S Madison and his recent Haley study Bibles are you kidding we just had a whole twenty four hours of that you know an end is the sense that business restlessness that I can satisfy and it's rarely a desire of my soul then I'm trying to meet with something else and so I have the desires of the spirit and the desires of the flesh and what happens is then routed in the same desire of the soul but the place is just how you can satisfy yourself yes I you can feel better about yourself just want to make you feel happy and the desires of the spirit come from the same basic design but they need you to really satisfy you at this thing God if I can vacuum inside of your life what is a vacuum do it sex why I think that you have a way out of the second visible in a band right very good I've had other people give me fancy definitions about vacuums but I'm not to get into those Kazaa another scientist but there is a vacuum inside again this is an illustration I wish it with me on my anymore Jen and I want to share it with you just imagine that you go out the mountain and you come back down and what a gamble what about what happens to one about a little beat up why it has a vacuum it has a vacuum inside because that pressure outside is now more than the pressure inside and so you have an acting business water buffalo pretty good knowledge of that look a little bent out of shape yet this is what allies alike now when you get down to the bottom of the hill and you open up the water bottle disorder does it sucks and whatever is right around now she has what goes on in our lives we haven't those that is put in there by God but because we don't have satisfied at this being just open it up and whatever is close by we second some of us it happened when we're ready you remaining five remaining ten ways of satisfying out those that were not good for us and now we find ourselves addicted because in a timely field that those we look for that thing that made us happy originates like it's built into our brains are you already remember how I used to feel when I had chocolate is feel better now but what is the one about of Bothell for water so until I have learned in my life until I been real thing I've always had this ongoing those that does not satisfy this is what it only goes on to send review and Herald sheath is Christ who alone can satisfy that since all want in the human soul his gracious invitation reaches down a new job time for the fountain of life is Christ who goes forth to a lost won't come unto me and Greg which uses the same huge handful of your life by going to some warehouse the only one who can satisfy the offensive line is Jesus he's the only one who can fill out within us all fears listenable essays we'll born helpless as soon as we are fully conscious we discover what loneliness a whole mean by very nature is one best need incomplete the parish recent MTA cloud and crying out with him who can identify the things that are now about it together and tie up those things that are still dangling lose you are a need none of us likes to think of ourselves that way hi my name is Allen and I'm needed that I mean he forgot and the reason why did need for others is because my mindless cop is running on empty so two ways I see you know pulling this altogether to waste on the spinoff this may have a blissful significance and we had a list for belonging so I'm dealing with addiction shows how I like to think about the summary company says I'm addicted I want to go down to the root what cool is there to become addicted in the first place how did this addiction begin and I want to leave them from focusing on their addiction because that's unfortunate what most psychology tends to do with you with addiction exchange behaviors exchange my fix I want to move away from that to understanding how I can help the gospel to meet with this because they will does is to be somebody who has purpose in life 's purpose in life doesn't tend to be as addictive and you notice that a placenta less significant scans to deal with addictions somebody has a meaningful belonging supposing from some young to see how can I how can I help them we established a purpose in life find out how God needs the significance they worked as ultimately we have with the creation and redemption and God when he meets out with when you feel worthwhile we tend to be less addicted secondly I find that people tend to have a need to connect with other people lots of people are more likely to get addicted people have a sense of belonging to feel like a part of the family part of the friendship group are less likely to be addicted now the problem is most of us mascot addictions with superficial connections so you know I have three hundred and twenty friends on Facebook anything else not France and I have like two thousand five hundred or something I don't know what it is but I'm a nightmare not my friend so sorry maybe some you get what I mean is that that's not ready what I experienced connection t run of my wall knowledge of what and what helps us to be connected is true vulnerability together with evidence in a community of faith that's what really helps me connect that you come to do I see because you want to connect with other people who want to follow junkies amen and so when you get she sometimes G Y C with all of its thousands of people can be the longest place in the plan because he was yes I maybe maybe I'll meet up with the person who I can really connect with the world is he going to programs and sitting listening to one guy will go right and so we know expensive connections on setting we need to find a way to connect because we don't connect people will not overcome their addictions so yes what I discovered when people get into community and experience true community that is more powerful than any counseling academic and when you really get with people who love you and care about you so we need to stop being those kinds of people to others can you say men that's what will help us so the reason I got to pastor we face it when we face in addiction I'm getting into some real practical things is as we finish up the seminar the reason once thriving some people feel is that I can't be happy and if you have less than I could escape my pain and you ever experience that although it's Saturday night and if I just had a boyfriend I would be so happy right now but that's not how you escape your pain and so they feel that a funny I can have the sense that my paying the second path that's quite different from that first path is that my goal is not happiness it is holiness is to reflect Christ in my life saw Hall in us does not mean the absence of pain was Jesus holding did he experienced pain he absolutely does the pain was not something that he avoided in fact sometimes you seem to have embraced Jesus say if any man would come after me with him deny himself with happiness they take up this and then followed me the way to deal with addictions is to embrace your pain I know I sound strange but hang in there with me holiness you see is being filled by God 's presence than what I mean by that if you were to go let's say it's the day after the burning bush Moses is walking past that same Bush the next day that he suddenly do a little dance and skipper to all like to take my shoes off Mrs. Polly ground is of the lolling around now why not because it was God 's presence that made at home so what his Holiness Holiness is being filled with God 's presence but you can't be filled with God 's presence if you don't recognize your those for God so the way to overcome addictions is to really deal with the pain all out does and so you can say you don't like my mother didn't love me my father did love him and let me my grandmother been lending my great-grandfather did not you may have all of these things say how many of these you University my knowledge I know that Hoskins I've been through I came from a divorced family my mother remarried a man who should know at the time that he was homosexual and then he made a move on my brother so my mother divorced him married another guy she had five kids who couldn't stand kids and so I ended up at the age of six and a half going to boarding school and so that's funny my background is missed that but I know my first and if I cancel that tremendous boost inside of me is going to be meant by the wrong things is a long following and sulk until I understand my pain is that I can and in intellect and embrace my pain and realize that God would in the midst of my painter felt like those I am not going to be able to sell him fully and the great news is this Jesus said who loves him or the one who is forgiven much of the one who is forgiven little notch why because they understand us and you and you feel like you know how deep my partners and I think God does and his grace is sufficient for weights in at about grace that much more about you baby so dusty that God 's grace will be much more of why until you recognize you those you are going to continue to be addicted that's the only way so instead what we can have is the self-directed life we can't control our life avoid pain this you pleasure we try and control our lives not just control it help prevent pain no pain pain is out to pleasure as it however nicely control not pay the money all have it all control and instead we find ourselves addicted an out-of-control interview follow me with this as all just what happens this from inside out one once things that seem clear at the moment one thing that seems clear at the moment sorry then is that momentum what kind of suicide by Larry Graham said exactly the opposite is true the fact that the pets alive across often feels like the path to dance and at the past today that his players to feel like the path to live is a tragic common tree on how far we've gotten off the track in one following the process of becoming aware about those that is terrible what a great weight in the same but to explore and embrace update puts us in a small company of Thursday people who because they feel beat us know what it means to come to Christ indeed in quiet trust the way to space is helplessness the way to face his helplessness because it is only when you're truly helpless you recognize I can fix this by myself for those of you who struggled in CNN again and face the same thing are not the prescribed is read your Bible and pray we do even all those things are very needful and status of just you can't do it but got to God 's grace is sufficient for God 's grace is the already thing the Internet you are a child of the shank and because you are a child of the King the more despicable you are the greater his grace the more challenging of circumstances the more incredible his power the law you struggle with temptation the more power he promises which is they went every temptation there is a way of escape but that way of escape God is an act of grace the placenta manages to deny his pain behind the sign off togetherness is dangerously vulnerable listen to this developing can't possibly sinful habits because he is not dealing a death blow to the wrong strategies that enjoy that blocked his enjoyment of the Lord he is not worried to deal with South the unrecognized and largely consult a can assault still demands relief he's rightful being looked when he stumbled onto something that provides a flash of excitement at having done a lot of evangelism icing people stop addictive behaviors already to become addicted something else why because the real issue would what was going on in their hot and they never doubted that in a week on what they had monopoly on and so they will write for addiction example and so therefore they provide the facts of excitement and a sense of involvement the most entry relief of that core eight more closely resembles the experience of joyful living than anything he's known it brings them closer than all his efforts to be obedient and a half season of the obedient Christian I am frequently going to do what God wants me to do I will step all right let's see what we have to do code to judge off to church I got out of the appraisal was all right on Sarah Judge Catherine supposed to do that but you have to hide that might be disobedient just saying nice and quiet nice and can't wait I am going to be an obedient Christian praise the Lord and then it's time to go home and we go home and we faithfully get out how Bible study and we get out always in study and we study our list and we don't faithfully and obediently at the end that nights Sabbath hours world we get into an addictive behavior and for just a moment we experience a sudden sense of fulfillment that are beautiful existence then I guess I becomes powerful now if within a community of believers we experience genuine belonging and real significance if a hot need was fulfilled off from Christ it is grace was poured out into our life if it should could become that kind of place and if we focus in our Bible study saying God life is so thirsty that is real this is why is experiencing on and pay any thought about that that what's on my just a public space walk away Nintendo brings this cheap little invitation to make you feel that you think I'd either the real things on Coca-Cola I've had the real thing God has filled my that's a man that's what makes the difference in addictions what we do is remove of Sal on the throne and we put Christ on the front because when South is on the throne we hold these competing interests do this do that all of these wines that Australian outlines and yet when he put Christ on the front cell yields to Christ our interests our director by Christ and of hominy in our lives he brings harmony and so that the solution the way to fight the battle of addiction is to surrender not to the addiction I mean you know one of the poets I forget who it was the youngest he wasn't spiritually said the best way to get rid of and addiction is to give into it that's not a very spiritual approach what we mean by the best way to deal with it is the rent what is the best way more than it what you surrendering to you surrendering yourself and that you can read this all footsteps of Christ that the way to deal with addictions is to say God I give up on myself fill me with who you are enable my true desires to be made and you as the deer pants for the water sold my soul longs after you say got on my desire to be for you instead of for these cheap imitations I want you to fill up my life because you are my all in all I want you so fill me that I can only since my significance of my belonging and you and it would join with the group of believers we pray together we behold each other together I never skip through a couple of these yet because I want to just deal with the some last things yet how do we deal with it I want to give you some ABCs and I'm going to just run through these because these are critical the first thing you need to do with all this from every addiction I never dealt with the fullest place to begin is an admission that you are helpless and admission that you're thirsty you can go to AA meetings you can go to any kind of meeting what's the first thing that happens admit that you are helpless the biblically it says this your sins so that's a confession it begins that way I'm reminded of this story that took place in California where one lady who'd been in the church I just got to give her name Janet for sake of her identity and that Janet had been going to church for years beautiful lady that she had a secret problem with alcohol so she was at church one day and she said in the past I uncovered real problem she started going to AA meetings I started praying together and praise the Lord she ended up in the baptismal font to get rebaptized and so she stood up in front of the congregation and said most of you don't know this you see me as the pretty face that wonders through the whole race but my name is Jen 's and online and out I gasp go through the audience and now praise the Lord follows right afterwards as she shares her testimony in the past that you stand for the taken he says my name is Jim McMurray and nine and the whole gasp go through the audience a symbolic and any baptizes most of us are some kind of a Holick strike we have been addicted to something and when we can admit God I don't have it in myself but you have that foot step is critical because that opens us up to faith next we have to believe in God 's power to overcome and so I started same God I can do anything but I have faith that you can praise the Lord thirdly a specific conversation of sensibly admitting that I helplessly believe in God how telecom we confess our sin specifically we say God I'm helpless and I confess the sins to you infinitely we have to make a decision right now to stop and you can find this if you look in the Bible in a alike to find coals that so you need to do something right away before you leave G Y C you need to make a decision and so there is a choice it's not like you can do it without choice but the choice is a decision to surrender God I am surrendering this to you that when you send a stop right now there are ways to say that the way to say that is not I will never do this again and if you made those promises I never got again and again until tomorrow but when you say I'm not going to do this again is not the right Wednesday we say I choose to surrender this to God and to give up this behavior to instead let God film I influenced food in as a gauge in positive behavior that means you got you can't just take something away without replacing it you all know the parable about the demons that work at the demon that was sent out of the person 's life in any way and in Clovis with McCain back and found that the house was empty so they had a big party and all of the friends moved in there a several people who sit on a throw away all of my and my worldly music and I'm to get rid of it but they never replace it with good music so guess what happens that the list is still there so start doing behaviors that lead you to let God Philip that those inside of you there six arise upon Jesus I wish I had a broom yet I couldn't find one I like to do a little illustration where I put a broomstick on some of these finger and then I have been balancing any of you ever done this as a kid the balance of room in your finger and you know there's always one way you can do it does anybody know how you got a look at that they hit all the broomstick because as soon as you look down your full awareness of what I do as I tell them all right now do it by just looking at your hands so they looked out of a hat the current balance of the inevitably of fools out of balance I think he has the illustration when God is your focus when Christ is your focus when you're looking at your life will be a balance but as soon as you start looking at yourself how well you do we know how badly you during your life will fall out about the solution is not to spend more time thinking about ourselves but more time thinking about God and about how we can meet our needs then this point is just common sense but it really make sense get out of danger and I don't know why we think that if we keep certain things in our house that that will show just how strong we are and how we can overcome it now is really challenging with the computer what you do not have anywhere civil five proof of quite a number you know it takes the computer with a baseball bat is watching them from across the way that was it yes oh he's not young banging into the computer while they think that you are not too far off from because Jesus says if your right hand causes you to send what you did it not saying that you will need to walk around with one hand but what the implication is why would you let something keep you from him there are some things you just need to cut out of your life and get rid of so not place yourself in temptations like get out of danger and is less point is find a way to hold yourself accountable because and unless you want accountability partner we prove this through and through the people who are struggling with addictions do so much better when I have someone else hold them accountable for two reasons double one it stops cell from being on the throne because when South is on the front it says I don't need to be accountable to anyone number two it provides a sense of community and since that's one of our units does it we can have community with someone else that will help to hold us accountable to what we should be now I can tell you that you can do all of these steps and still be addicted if you try this again I've written a hand that you can do all of these steps and still be addicted because it's not a short-term solution using these the going get angry at the morning here in iPhone against that somewhat Drive you need to throw out the bad stuff and going get some real-world because that's what you were created that spring but again I want to thank you that you called us to overcome and some of us we struggle and yet we believe that your grace is sufficient you have six three what I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me help us not to slide down the slope that simply says I just change my behaviors off I forget about it I'll feel better about myself instead low help us to trust in your promise to claim the promise of you weren't that with every temptation you have provided a way of escape as we deal with out in a hot needs as we open up our pain may use the lesser with the water of life and may we walked away from the seminar saying Lord I have found the Messiah for he is showing me everything I evidence and yet he still loves thank you in Jesus name amen and him to this he was in his audio versus what I see generation in Christ through you like to learn more about Jim Lacey please visit www. utilizes that I will review like this more free online service please visit www. audio verse more

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