Favorite Sermon Add to Playlist
Photo of Nicole Parker

The Broken Image, Part 1

Nicole Parker Steve Nelson


It's the ultimate expression of intimacy and commitment. Yet it is all too often distorted into an addiction and a weapon of abuse. Discover the great Miracle Worker's ability to deliver and heal body, mind, and heart as He restores His ideal for sexual wholeness.


Logo of Creative Commons BY-NC-ND 3.0 (US)

Free sharing permitted under the Creative Commons BY-NC-ND 3.0 (US) license.

The ideas in this recording are those of its contributors and may not necessarily reflect the views of AudioVerse.


Audio Downloads

This transcript may be automatically generated

him him him this message was presented FG Y C two thousand and eleven hundred other resources like this online menu I see where I had a mother this is not going talking about itself issue an issue and how it enslaves us I pray that you will make a strength perfect in our wiki especially myself I may need so much power that only you can get I pray that you will speak you need to every person who is listening to my voice today that each one may get what they need in order to draw closer to you and break free from the chains of banks in this morning I have talking about breaking the chains overcoming the cycle of sexual addiction we also titled that the broken which you probably look at in your booklet we challenge those two titled they both are reflection of what were talking about today on the principles and judiciary need today where applying to breaking free from sexual addiction but they actually apply to any kind of addiction and I know if any of you are in ministry your reaching out to other people you're going to be dealing with people who are addicted because addiction is often works all things addiction all addiction is then in some ways because addiction is idolatry putting or something else in the place of Christ they want to talk about how do we break free from the chains of men and I is not the really bad courageous of you to come here and be here for this presentation I know it's very good call for some people to walk into something like that I'm not assuming your sex addict because you're sitting here in the audience I know many of you are struggling with things from no other people in your family or your friend you want to know how to reach out to them how to share the gospel and that's exactly what we're here to talk about today we are here to talk about how the gospel applies to the brokenness that results from then in our lives now I find that young I counseled a lot of people who are struggling with addiction but particularly with sexual addictions everything is just more intense as other in a other addiction people face many of you know I've been overeating and I feel really bad about it but sexual addiction nobody just mentions that not denying out we were painting the boys room green and then by land classroom of sexual addiction you know nobody talked about that for fun my the lengthening and talking about their sexual addiction I know already they've been caught for a while and cycle of depression that you know you try so hard your sure you never do it again in a fall and feel awful and he promised God delivered it again and then it happened again and sometimes there may be a long break in between and you'll feel better you know often when a guy comes and talks to me this is a typical conversation when a guy comes and I think that sexual addiction nothing now been struggling with something you know it it's better now first they make you not you know I've been doing better it's kind of downs only once a week now or once every two months or once a day whatever it is that is better to be sure and tell me first figuring better than they used to they got this under control I think you know but they just thought I'd throw it out there see if I had a suggestion for women it's very different than that usually when a woman is going to talk to me about their sexual addiction I know like from the first sentence before the even of their mouth sometimes there's this tour sure you know this well I don't know where to start in and sometimes that's when the tears start and then I haven't told my mother I hadn't told anybody or you know nobody knows this I just feel like I would die if someone found out or my dad found this on my computer and I just feel so terrible for women there is an intense sense of shame that comes along with sexual addiction feeling like God will never give me a good spouse now nothing I don't feel that you try to cycle through it more guys will feel terrible and then often are coming back to well you know all guys have this problem you know there's a very different feeling about from from one person 's experiences sexual addiction to another person 's experience of sexual addictions allowed to talk about today are general principles but I know for you your experience may be unique and it may not feel like that you know many girls have fallen to the guy category value now I have a day better about this and many guys will be that I just feel like killing myself I remember one guy who e-mailed me new made up a fake e-mail address actually so that he can Skype 's identity and write to me and I wish I could say that the only person is on that and actually had quite a few people make up fake e-mail addresses in order to write me that they don't want to tell me who they really are this intense shame that I was in ministry I don't know to this day who belies e-mail me several times and I was just so struck by the desperation in his e-mail I was afraid to commit suicide I heard from it several times I wrote back I correspond with them but eventually hear from and anymore Vicky sat down that e-mail address but I hope that maybe he's out there and you listen this presentation find victory and now he was really battling to find freedom and use of torture him a new ministry couldn't stop himself from the yesterday we talked about sexual brokenness that happens because of other people and against the being sexually abused and many people who struggle with sexual addiction also have been sexually abused as one of the primary factors that causes a person to fall into a psychosexual addiction and those of interviews sometimes just hated even worse because they felt that he smiled and their whole experience of sexuality has been poisoned by that initial abuse so they easily detach themselves emotionally from the sexual experience and find a way to suppress that craving for God that they have in a craving for agency a craving for somebody to satisfy that somebody loved me somebody please make me feel like I have some control of my life so for guys there's often a strong tendency to need for control for girls there's often a stronger drive a craving for somebody to love me so you know many girls would not consider themselves to be sexually addicted who are addicted to say romance novels or romantic movies or fantasizing these things are also sexual addictions they are warping of what God intended sixty feet and they put you on the track to falling into other things like masturbation and pornography so when a woman gets to the point where she's into pornography often she's been cultivating the seeds of a porn addiction for a long time you know the little girls love to talk about marriage my daughter was two years old when she first said when he gave me we just gone for wedding end to her marriage men walking around in a beautiful dress father that he takes pictures of you and eating cake great but she had been consistent in his desire to get married Mary the Israeli marry somebody exactly like daddy is my daddy to pick her husband right now are at the bullet body help me pick my husband and the views were only eight I hope it gets better he is asked with what he wants no much and am so glad that you look at our marriage is something I want but that means I fear for her because I know that so many of the kids around her are already cultivating things that are leading to them getting sexually addicted how many of these young men were growing up her age now are going to be rapists by the time she's eighteen we live in a terrifying world and for me the most terrifying part of it all probably is that my children are going to have the Internet right at their fingertips all the time there's nothing I can do about that sometimes we just typed in something innocuous on YouTube like American girl and up top whole bunch of things like good news what if my daughter had actually click on its terrifying because I know how deep-rooted problem can begin just by one initial viewing of porn I remember a girl that I talked with who felt so devastated because she had been born when she was about seven or eight years old and one of her friends introduce it to her she didn't realize it was wrong she does watch and that's really interesting you know one for a few years she and her friend went often on March pornography pornography online then one day when she was about twelve it dawned on her how evil this was an act that moment she shut the computer she did not watch anymore but the guilt and shame that tormented her that painting of her thoughts about that stayed with her so much that many years later she's talking to me thank never viewed porn again but I feel so horrible so permanently defiled because of what I on him bring raising young people in this world today I cannot say too much to you about how dangerous it is to just surf the Internet wildly curiously looking up stuff be careful when you have children be careful of your children because while I know that God can heal from anything you don't want to go down that road you always go farther than you think you I've I discovered that many people there in their image of sex is permanently defiled but at least they feel like that because of their early sexual experiences with abuse or viewing porn or something like that is and the question that they have any questions and I had for many years is why did God make sex anyway what a horrible thing off I can't let all the people being laid all these children being molested in all the nasty magazines and just so terrible and second filthy we can make something like that anyway I really doubted that God could have made something so nasty and you know when I think of that makes me think of how sometimes when I make bread I like to make Conrad special kind of bread grated together slightest take my ordinary bread so you know I break into three balls and roll it out into strips and then I break the three together into one low and then put it in the oven when it rises and they those three strands are one you can't just break my heart anymore that love is all one month rent just as surely as if I made it into one ball of dough and put it into the oven and this is often what happens with that God created sex it's a beautiful she were wholly wonderful gift I didn't understand how beautiful and pure will lie only if I got married when I found just how wonderful it is that God has given us this gift will be like if we didn't have sex no two people stand as impenetrable bunch of people and promise to be remain till death do us part you've ever had a roommate you probably don't want a place to live the left the apartment I remain active in with them for one year right marriage would be very strange arrangements if you had to pledge to live your whole life with one person you don't fully know yet just to make a gamble on it choose this one is my roommate for the rest of my life and God created that to change that to make this incredible deep intimate union between two people who if they had sex the day before the wedding it would be then even an hour before the wedding it would be a spent an hour after the wedding or the day after the wedding it is a blessed experience that is ordained by God what is it that makes that magical difference that something that would've been a thin becomes something that blessed and ordained by God and only thing happened in between two people say words and that weird you see there's something magical and mysterious about sex we cannot fully understands that God has created this to be something that belonged to people my husband is the sexiest man in the world to be feared a blessing Murphy is at it again because I had experience with any other guy so I look to him that since he is me and I think wow back in the evening not only that of course this is all we had the fact that we hated each other all the rest with vitamin D the hot right that would be terrible I made him realize how deeply united we are second is a beautiful piece you are wholly wonderful gift from God and you may not feel like that if you have been abused or you've been addicted but I want you know you can because I do and I have been abused and I have been addicted yesterday I talked a little bit about my experience as a ten -year-old and so I was probably like seventeen eighteen you know I struggled with fantasies all the time and my friend and I were totally sexually addicted a little ten -year-old always looking at men's crotches and talking about dings as we called them in my feeds you to be really miles actual addiction when you have to deal with porn addict but I can assure you a warning around and I had been exposed to it as a young person I would have been addicted instead I was addicted to porn if the minds novel reading I would stay up until two or three in the morning when I have to go to school the next day reading the same three pages of the novel is the one for the sex scene and imagining fantasizing with satellite and you know some of those were disturbing these these pictures that now that I'm married I know how different it is in reality need you people are so controlled by passion in the novel they can't hold themselves back they can think they can read all they have to do is just devour each other sexually is not God ordained plan for sex when you're together sexually with a person the way God intended it is about a relationship between the two of you is not about an event that your body craves so intensely that nothing else in the world matters that is called blast that is something that leads to shame and this is the problem that that many people face that sat in life and shame are braided together until they become one in the person 's mind and it's impossible for them to distinguish between sex lust and Shane my analysis and makes them feel like just find somebody anybody many just look at people I remember one of my friends and I would just gone what we called manhunt we just come in stroll around that can't meeting or something looking for hot guide to work with a big announcement what were we smoking my goodness but we were just infesting our needs guys that actually embraces the come up and flirt with that we lock away you could you be happy with you my own and then we go on to find another victim it was it we were just shut less about that but you know I was fifteen the really bad thing is that they are people who are twenty five who were still doing one thing and older you know they walked into the party okay there are young by fifteen people of the opposite effect here so they control around figure out who those three of the most attractive and they don't flirt with those three of the next half an hour and in which everyone seems to respond best to them they flirt with that person the rest of the evening or third world and try to come home and everything that went with them now I would suggest to you that that approach even if you're not even longer than the familiar doing is flirting with the rest of the evening your sowing the seeds of the same kind of behavior that's out there in the world if all you do is just flirt with the person you wouldn't dream of doing something wrong like going to bed now but you using them you using them as an object of sex you using MS something that feeds your hormonal urges instead of seeing this person is a child of God these of the feeds that people so that lead to sexual addiction women talk about today I have two stages of this presentation the first one of talking about things that you will hear a lot of places how to overcome sexual addiction the Santa Monica deeper into how do you upgrade you stop selling those feeds the evil because the way is there to think about sex I think the sea veggies so that leaves the fruits of wrong behaviors God wants us to see sex is a beautiful piece your gift the reflection of his MH if you want to know you he wants to know you mean you specifically he wants you to be able to be totally naked and unashamed and is an art and it should be scooped and I do so more people in supplies created this image of his relationship with us call back he wants you to understand that he wants you to be naked and unashamed with him but you can come to him about anything you feel you don't have to do five things you don't have to pray formally sponsored just for yourself house to become intimate with him I could go much deeper into this whole area you know this picture of God in his love for a four woman to give herself to a man she has to become naked and you know it may be a painful experience particularly the first time when we give ourselves to God it's terrifying when did you feel that way when I surrendered myself to God I felt like I was stepping off this cliff into the blackness not gotten this voice from gamblers Emery will catch you definitely know that no you're not in a wreck my life because you let me be abused and that all these bad things happen to me he seated you that I suffered had worked my image of who God was my belief in his character this is what always happens we wonder if God is really who he says he is you really loving the really trustworthy so we try to take control of our own life we make pleasure our God we think I can do much job finding happiness then God can't look at what is on my life so far so we take the steering on our own lives that I got this under control not all colony if I need you and we had to wear what we think it can make us happy and we surrender our lives to God too often like okay okay think that working out well at all when I'm steering to let you e-mail the money just keep as you get here I'll tell you where to go in and work out okay that's not really surrender to God and I would propose you the facts mindset is that the heart of much sexual addiction we fear that meeting I've not been assessed for you maybe don't want to give us a spouse when he never just as anybody went through my whole life to him and then he never gives me I wish I could say I never was foolish enough to think that but I live many times never gives me anybody and I messed up don't know if I can never be lost I like that could give good gifts and only could get to his children you can trust with your life God wants you know that sex is a beautiful gift where she comes into you God when you surrender yourself to God she comes into view he changes you give themselves to you and you become part of him he becomes part of you you're so intertwined it hard to distinguish when you're doing something with you drink all for doing your own level to the common youth together this is the sexual experience that God ordained for marriage I realize most Americans aren't like that most people get married wish they hadn't honestly most of the people you're walking past in the grocery store who are married and you're going you're so lucky to be married nitpicking your selectivity single silly people get married in order to have sex with Idol meter this one you know one thirty two maybe nobody else will ever come along I'll never be able to have sex many say that the really bad reason to get married him very funny because you want to unite your life with them not because you want to unite your body with them and because you unite your life with them and love them you trust them that's when you have the power to really unite your body and a beautiful and holy way otherwise you to people using each other sex is supposed to be about giving not about getting and this is the problem that lies at the heart of my sexual addiction that people have sex in order to get they want pleasure and want to be loved they want somebody to appreciate their beauty instead of it being about giving which is what it's like nearing marriage and you know I'm not stealing virtue from this person I'm not doing something a loving to use them in order to satisfy my lust you can never really make love outside of marriage even affect but you can only really make love inside of marriage because that's the only time it's nothing and even when it's in marriage if you're trying to force the other person Arthur's some kind of unloving attitude at the heart of why you're having sex it's still not a loving the fact is supposed to be a reflection of the character of God and God 's plan is to parade those strands that lasting shame take them all apart so that you can see them reflected in what he really is a God who loves you who wants to be close to you want to give you good guess just like many another God 's great gift like music relationships referred their great gift from God that they can be used in terrible ways in the same way sex is a great gift of God the fact that it can be so terribly abused in some sense of what a powerful gift it must be forgot to give it to us anyway sexual addiction is powerful for several reasons first of all because we are created sexual beings many people who come to me with their sexual addiction issue him just wish that I cannot feel anything anymore I don't want to be sexually addicted I just prayed and prayed that God doesn't take always meanwhile no because he created you to be sexual God created us male and female that's why sexual abuse strikes at the heart of who we are as my counsel explains me the first time I went to counseling he said you are deeply wounded by the sexual abuse that happened to you because sex is the very core of who we are created male and female there's nothing wrong with being a sexual being it's a beautiful gift of God Beagle I be brown her dream are sex is not bad it's a beautiful gift your sexuality is a reflection of who God made you to be secondly sexual addiction is powerful because we live in a culture of shallow relationships and fractured families this is why people are craving intimacy they don't feel love I don't feel like they're worth anything and everywhere you go you're told that back is the key effects will make you feel love sex will give you that that intimacy you crave them deeply sexual abuse and misuse our grandparents this is another reason why sexual addiction has so much power because the person who has been sexually abused tend to feel permanently defiled and the strong temptation to believe the devil fly that not even the blood of Jesus can cleanse you from your own sexual sin and not even do that can set you free from the shame somebody else's against you you realize the difference between guilt and shame yesterday we talked more about saying what you feel because someone else has abused you Shane of the message from the devil that makes you feel like you are bad guilt is a message from God that since you have done something that the guilt guilt is a different thing altogether and change your no you are and how they tell you you send there something standing between you and me look at the way that can be close to you again guilt is God speaking to your heart and I love you the guilt of the voice of God when you are driven to your knees he said Lord I'm so sorry I spent it until I tried to their when you get an easy repetitive confessed and yet you still feel like trash this is not the same shame is a message from the battle it feels like guilt in the opposite shame the message of hopelessness it tells you not you done something bad but you are bad not even the blood of Jesus can wash it clean David something that will destroy you I've seen so many people who are obsessed with facts and consumed by shame the two are linked like traffic cannot be pulled apart when their access to fax they feel terribly ashamed because the devil keeps telling them you are defiled whether someone else has been against them by their own men and the devil said you're permanently defiled you can never be washed white as snow like the Bible says if each end of the message of unbelief thank God is a liar he said he can cleanse you can't why not well because you still feel dirty if you still feel dirty you must still be dirty right shade the temptation to believe what you feel instead of what the word of God that and if you are struggling with shame you must believe the word of God God said if you confess your sin I am faithful and just to claim you he will do it for you he cannot lie but many people because they cannot believe that are sucked right back into the fight will be used I remember a person you came to me and was battling so desperately but the feeling and when as we talk him she admitted she'd been sexually abused in the past mission told what she was continually doing to them even going back to the employment of the same was done to me and I hate it so much I don't enjoy it all I keep doing it is impossible that the problem is you believe somehow that you are defining health this is who you are this is who you really feel like you you are because you are so dirty and she started to cry yes that's exactly it she felt permanently defiled by someone else's sexual sin against her and therefore she was incapable of believing that Jesus could cleanser I said you know what you've been confessing the wrong thing after you've gotten into a porn binge you go to God he confessed what you've done but you haven't confessed what great sin of unbelief doubting what God said in Scripture where we're told that nothing that comes from outside of a person can defile them it's only what comes from within and find that Jesus gives a list of thin fins that flow from our own hearts the only thing making a file you is your own spin and the blood of Jesus can cleanse you from now when we struggle with sexual addiction often is because sexual abuse in the use of poisons our view of sex and I don't mean just by someone touching you sometimes it can be someone looking at you or making ugly statements about your body or about how sexy you look making you feel the files that sexual abuse but often what also defiled our mind is the advertisements the movies and music that magazines all these things because sexual addiction is powerful for fourth reason that we live in a super sexualized society people are surrounded by sex constantly it's almost in possible to not be affected bias you know my children live in a house where there are no magazines like that where there is no television like that and yet will go out into ten on or sometimes the church I remember get a day we were sitting in church and my four -year-old luck at Friday's match I thank you sweetie that was during Sunday service is not right in the church were settlement heard that you we live in a super sexualized society and people all around you are dressed this way or you're looking at moving them or him something that continually pours this health into your mind so hard to keep your mind clean and girls you know I I know I'm not to make a big one appeal about modesty but growth please have mercy on guide you if you if you really want if you really want to attract the losers trust me dressed modestly and they won't come out like cockroaches if you want to attract a decent time is restrain yourself because video and guide to you and avert their eyes the kind of guy you want to marry is the kind of guy who will not allow himself to be around you if you dressed that way because it's hard for him to look at using sister in Christ when you're busy sticking out candy Frank you know I get so frustrated when my husband a teaching class anytime only like cannot wait until winter come to be women where they will be at an end make that both bird in the front row and you just like okay where can I let you know and I don't feel I have an advantage that a lot of people don't have I have a husband likened rust a lot of my friends who got married I feel so sad because they don't have what I have on my husband does the work I don't ever wonder who he's with a view called manifest on staying late at the office I don't ever wonder if he goes away for a weekend I do not have to ask him when he comes back so what did you do where you with anybody did you watch something in the hotel movie you don't need to ask this question because I trust him I know what kind of man he is I nobody does anything think that he doesn't want the kind of man you want to marry girls and guys F economy you want to be when you avert your eyes the kind of things you reflect the image of Christ and you helped fight back against the super sexualized society when you take the second glances your sowing the seed there animates so much more difficult when late at night you're battling the temptation and you realize I'm about to hit the edge righteous go nevermind I don't care I'm disputing a common computer not feel terrible and just get this over with you know where I'm talking about when you come to that point you've been selling seats for a long time to get to that point selling seeds of not spending time with Jesus of not loving him achieving to serve self of choosing to look at the opposite sex as an object of lust when you start filling those needs you'll be amazed at how much easier that battle with talk about that in the second presentation when God is the center of your life you will find that your sexual addiction will have a way of limitation on ability completely gone now God didn't promise to take away temptation he promised to save you from sin and he will do that but I do find that people deal with the root issues the fruit issues tend to dry up and go away I want to share with you some grim statistics quick quickly here twenty five million Americans visit five or six one to ten hours per week another four five nine him over eleven hours per week on them over half of all money spent on the Internet in two thousand three was related to sexual activity over twenty five percent of those with Internet access at work viewed pornography during working hours that is scary to me deep people aren't that desperate that they can't lazily get off of work what can happen when there's a blackout all over their city for a week and nobody can access their porn is really scary to me this does not even take into account peer-to-peer filesharing which is ICH area of where people interact sexually online someone recently told me that he just doubt that sexual abuse anyway is increasing since the beginning of time the user had buried in the world that you know people actually are kind of blinded to how powerful and how huge this plate is I want to share this partly to help you understand that if you're struggling against her alone probably at least one out of every two people if you might be maybe two out of every three are struggling with it or have struggled recently in the past I know this because not only do you let what people say half of young men are hard doing that a lot of girls are too because I know it coming and talking to me and everyone feels like I'm the only one in the world is doing so sick the total porn industry revenue for two thousand six the thirteen three billion in the United States ninety seven billion dollars worldwide US adult DVD and video rentals in two thousand five were almost one billion that's just in America unique worldwide users that means each individual person visiting adult website monthly seventy two million is mind-boggling that this many people are defiling themselves with the wrong view of sex more than seventy percent of men from eighteen to thirty four visited pornographic fighting a typical month that is terrifying nine out of ten children between the ages of eight and sixteen have viewed pornography on the Internet average age of first viewing pornography for boys and eight and for growth of eleven now that means that your factoring in a lot of kids you don't need until they're sixteen how many kids are seen it to its refining in the guest bedroom or something terrifying because each one of those kids may be stained permanently and twenty years later they can still play with him and at that age forty seven percent of families that pornography is a problem in their home forty seven be careful little eyes which is the and be careful person who is planning to get married you look at don't consider somebody who you think might possibly fall into this one the mass I wanted after twenty seven million sex slaves worldwide two million of them children if that doesn't break your heart and whatever could every thirty seconds someone victimized the slave trade makes more than thirty two billion dollars a year more than Walmart Coke and McDonald's combined statistics say that at least one in four girls are sexually abuse in America in reality from mine my own experience is probably more like one into it terrible and more than that I wanted just bring this about homosexuality is a monumental crisis facing the church I know that with a group this size there several people in here who are struggling with homosexuality don't feel like you are weird aberration and if anybody found out your life would be over not true homosexuality is not something that you just you born thrown into this box your homosexual you never be able to break away from this many people drift back and forth between their sexual attractions in the world knows that even though they do not read the statistic you are somewhere out there very careful to make it sound like you're just one plan is not easy to change but some of you may have already been at the is anything coming out ministries I wanted to first ask those who are here from coming out ministries to stand out and up here is Mike Lisa Wayne and Verna all four of these people have battled and overcome sexual addiction homosexuality and I am just so proud of him and I I would encourage every one of you to go to their blues get their information by their T-shirt be aborted every one of you knows somebody who's struggling with homosexuality you know a lot of people and they also are specializing you can put down now I guess I like the guys that they are not hiding elements any unfair but they can actually help you in dealing with sexual addiction issues you go to their booth W will give you information about their individual ministries that leads by beholding his love with the wealth yet know his love and narrow way therefore ministries events together to make coming out ministries together we need to unite in the battle to help those were battling with homosexuality all good three B and re- airing an interview with Vernon Lisa talking about their testimony going talk with these people take away that the scourge of prejudice that people have toward homosexuality is just a problem of sexual addiction one category of many kinds of sexual addiction and God 's people free all the time I have a lot of homosexual friends everyone knows how much I love them yes I know that I believe homosexuality is wrong but also that I love you with all my heart I pray for them and I do not look down on the him he is not that way at all times set people free we need to deal with a plate of homosexuality and we need to take a front running authentic because it is killing so many people not just the fact that some people are struggling with homosexuality but also the fact this is what the world says see the Bible is true because in years there proof that the Bible is true the Bible says homosexuality but we now know it's just something genetic people are born they can't change nevermind the millions of people who can testify that God has change them and have these conversations is mind blowing beyond Facebook when either my skin burned our argument in weighing you know there's this person is posting on my Facebook page you know nobody actually can break free from homosexuality that's later created and they're all Internet but I decided that I didn't need anything no but nobody can it is impossible that somebody's mind that closed we need to go out there and share the truth that God 's people free from every kind of thin that gone is the author victory piece of healing freedom if you're struggling with things you can also go to North .com national Association for the research and therapy of homosexuality he still can't believe I'm really telling the truth the people change all the time go read the hard statistics that right there and he won read more testimonies that Exodus global alliance .org there are times of testimony is something people break free from all the time many people you know probably have struggled with it broken free from it but they learn anything because they don't want people to be holding their children away from them and you know suspicious of them it's not particularly want to talk about as hard as it was for me to get up and talk about being sexually abused it can be much harder to get up and talk about that breaking free from homosexuality because you think that concentrated disadvantage not really free right we all know feel you'll fall back into that was a rarity on the scale you still look a hot man was the one now you are you tempted the everlasting question thank you are you him him and people amaze me you then you make an excellent UV the fact that people can say well you made and that has mean that your ever be able to actually know the width of the opposite sex but I would I would strongly recommend you that you could talk to these people and you will find out when you get to the root of what's going on in your heart God profoundly changes your attractions your impulses and who you are no not promised to set you free from ever being tempted by anything but God does promise to give you victory and as you get to the root of the things that caused the temptations you find an amazing freedom and healing him him others on my other friend that fairly with Iran either the other when a coming out ministries thank you for coming on our right in sexual addiction all that bad I hope that you've been able to see from the statistics I showed you how dangerous it is that I just want to mention of anything when brain cancer taking about porn and heroin users the brain with almost identical that craving for pleasure for something that they think will form five terrifying sometimes believe one is more addictive than heroin because the porn addicts drug never completely washes out of his assist her system because you forgot the images there he or she had countless hundreds of images that he can flip and pull from his brain anytime you like to go in there this is why it's so difficult to break free and so important that you Matthew Drive Christ the only way that you will never overcome sexual addiction is by focusing yourself on Christ instead of self make Christ the center of your life and you'll watch the chain fall off of yourself things that you never thought I overcome me give you some steps to victory some of these you can find online you know this is a typical progression that many clean places you'll be able to look up some of you I know have already tried many of these that I want to mention I'm going to be talking about something different something you won't usually find on the sexual addictions things like that talking about getting to the root issues but first unless they be honest with yourself and God behold not a virus truth in the inward parts the Bible says and in the hidden part of shalt make me to know wisdom unless you have truth in your heart you can admit to yourself on it and struggling and I am addicted you won't break free just like an alcoholic word drug addicts not as even speak the truth in his heart will be saved to be honest be honest with yourself and with God about what she struggling with number to accept responsibility for your sins first Daniel fifteen verse fifteen tells us the story of fall and how when all had gone attempted to kill a gag and now all that but he ended up not killing a gag not killing all the animal it went than a company conference infected you do what I said oh yeah I love the Lord they said what I hear all these sheep then all that well that people the people brought their in the people save the best in people if other people fall guys do not blame girls who dress in modestly for your sins it is not their fault yes they are responsible they are accountable to God for the way they behave girls don't blame dicey because some girls really struggling guy dressed in tight pants and muscle shirts and try to seven o'clock p.m. please save yourself for yourself and everyone is both appreciate that we dress in fact my money how don't nobody many angry e-mails about how untiringly recommend understanding and responsibility for your own then I get so angry when I hear stuff like some pedophile he says while the problem with this little girl is dressed like this one you going down that road that when you start when everybody else with my life would have affected me I wouldn't be struggling with sexual addiction no if you are connected to thought he would be struggling with sexual addiction if not somebody else's all other people they responsibly for their own sins and you bear responsibility for yours until you except responsibility for your stand for your behaviors and for your thought process that you want to break free choose life get rid of every stumbling block you know some people think that I decided to get rid of everything but I'm not the filter on my computer and then people would know while no you need to get rid of every sampling block I don't care what it is you know what your something blocks are I remember when I felt was a girl who is in New York City she she was bisexual all she had already sexual addiction issues in the content that she gave her life to Christ and we prayed over her she had been battling demon possession and she was delivered from that in a prayer session with several pastors and myself and Annie Morgan is the beginning of the seminar here and we pray that this girl she came to stand in my house that night because she was too terrified to go back to her apartment she said she had so much stuff there that she didn't want to be in that room is full of evil demonic stuff next day I went with her to her apartment man I never saw anything like this stuff geniality sex toys and weird things and dry wine everything you know she's the poor and wine down the think and I'm like okay at drug with this just like all your asthma drugs but this is probably the better you know that you know whether dialysis I joined on the floor and I think nothing okay right down he got sent back to me wow you know one day at a time as I said yeah Jesus now you don't need your your drive anymore she said all of course she present her chapter drugs in the bottom of the stuff I have to hold back across New York City on the Lord but nobody thought anything like that I even am ready that I is him as you know when this girl of all she had in her apartment it was one thing that she was desperate to find one piece of clothing I have no idea why but this one thing has such power for her she's like I got to find that piece of laundry and got defined as going to throwing everything out about her drawers crying uncontrollably I got to find out and get rid of it she finally found it burst into tears again through the box free I don't know what was connected that but she did I don't know what connected with whatever you're struggling with but if you won't kneel down and break your heart before God and say God I need to let go of she will tell you later friendships that need to go maybe their people you need to block on Facebook because the stuff that they post maybe there magazines you need to throw away not even pornographic magazines maybe just model than an people that you look at it you compare your body to bears and its secular enough I thought feeling the tremendous need to feel desirable validity and but God knows and if you pour yourself out before him he will help you to know what the stumbling blocks are entertainment snow of course doesn't mean that you have to give up movies and music none of us could do that right now consider the way I discover in a working end with university students not even four years ago when we first moved to southern things are we have to give up her movies now it's more like Pokémon you can expect not to watch movies people are getting more and more speed every year in this culture as well of course you can watch movies and listen to whatever we like now like to be that music is sensual and you can tell it given that I don't care what the words are if this is someone walked for you do not cling to it and rationalize because that is when the Holy Spirit the city and the Holy Spirit is when you cannot be honest with yourself and with God about what you're actually struggling with if you have to just go with an a cappella Scripture songs for two years and I'm not saying I think you need to do I'm going go to God and put everything in your life on the altar if you're really serious about breaking free and can don't tell him what you are not willing to give up ask him what he wants to give up but if it means not watching movies just because no matter what you do you can't get away from the way people dress and the wrong methods of relating to other people there to be portrayed and then let the TV and movies music whatever discount is more precious to you in Christ because this is the real issue if those things are more precious even Christ you're already lost your already on your way out of the kingdom not saying a prayer hands up in this context final never be able let go of everything I'm saying press close to Christ let him satisfy your heart when you do that you will find that the grip of those things when you send business to come a time when you just go only you know actually not tended by anything in the world anymore but you will find that God will give you victory progressively and as you let go of things you'll find freedom he never could've imagined before forcing you need to admit that willpower alone cannot debut the Bible has many as received him to them gave he power to become the sons of God even to those that believe on his name or watched the blood of Christ this is what will set you free many of you already know willpower cannot save you because you've Artie tried and tried and tried and tried and tried as I have observed in dealing with sexual addiction people try and try and try and try over and over for the asked for help because they just somehow still have the feeling that they can think themselves either works you know it is a legalistic perspective really think somehow we don't really need Christ of course the printer when I could talk to anybody else I know if I just try hard enough I can stop myself from number five builds spiritual community and accountability you know I listed up your covenant eyes .com there are other websites that endeavored at an Xbox is a good when I ate with Eric there are different websites and ways that you can find accountability partners people who can help you I would give you unconscious now with something like covenants high heel send an e-mail to your accountability partner saying phone to access this right now that's important really helpful it may pull you back but if you really got a serious addiction issue on your hands you're not going to be able to just break for using that effect on people find it a challenge to try to get around the software just having an accountability partner or something a filter on your computer is not enough because that's dealing with fruits issues you got to get to the root issues and one of the crucial root issues into God to have spiritual community you need to have healthy relationships with people in order to help you get away from the twisted way of relating to people spiritual community you know I asked chapter one were told about what happened with the apostles Jesus says no guys don't want to do evangelism instead get together and pray for your so oh before the Lord in brokenness in humility and anyone with one another make things right with one another build a solid spiritual community you're not getting out of this are you wrong you didn't get into trouble all by yourself there were lots of factors in your life it drove me there but you never get out on your own denarii found that if you tried and tried and tried if you could run through from broken free from this by yourself you would have to find them build spiritual community find people you can be honest and vulnerable with about what you're battling weight I don't know where you can find those people God knows that they are asking to send you to the people who can help you to be spiritually accountable and cultivating wholesome friendships will help you not to crave intimacy so deeply many people the reason why they driven back to court again and again particularly for girls because they don't have anyone they can be really honest and vulnerable with us so they don't feel really love ever many guys there you know how to be close to people guys had no macho approach to things and they they end up not feeling intimate or close with anybody on this created us to live in the community know other cultures in the world families are so close match you have the whole community that helps raise the kid out of a positive and negative but the truth is God creating estimate and the community that's why he doesn't say go spend every Sabbath fountain was walking around the bonds in the new Bible he said go get together with other believers because you're going to need them you need community you need hold deep relationships you might want to go listen to a presentation I have on audio verse called from self protection to full connection about how to build deeper friendships with people daughter gains that we have close connection with other human beings even if you don't tell everybody you know it's not likely to go sin church and say hi I'm from the porn addiction that may not be the most effective way to deal with it but you need close friend who you can be honest with people you can be real with not just about porn but about life about your walk with God about whether you're having devotional time consistently you need somebody hold you accountable and that he week builds spiritual community and accountability now immerse yourself in God 's word and prayer by word and I hid in my heart I might not sin against thee he want to break free from sin you need his word hidden in your heart you many times what you need to do is ask about what I'm really craving one of my turning to this porn is advanced searching for controlling need desperately to be able to be in control of it I want to be attractive to many different words I need to be one of these root issues are going to keep manifesting himself to possibly extend to come popping redneck up again but as you deal with those issues and say Lord what is that I'm craving and he'll reveal that to you in your time and with him in prayer and study the word then you go to his word and you find promises that tell you I do love you with an everlasting love with loving kindness I draw you find places in the work that God promises to be when it is your craving for then when you start find yourself being attracted to what things you know are wrong deal with it now don't wait until they are not a good undisputed extract myself from it over while and it doesn't shower and getting something we call a friendly order pizza it's not bad to distract yourself that you must deal with the craving that you half that God wants to satisfy on often you'll find yourself instead of getting to where you write on the verge of the cliff and sliding down you catch yourself back here before you get to that point and turn around focus yourself on Christ again think and reason for you pour out your heart in praise and thanksgiving in love for him and you find the addiction will fade away strike at the root of sin issues that what were talking about the whole of next presentation this is what you don't often find in other books you know there's been a lot of people read every man's Battle I'm not a bad book but I don't think it's enough every man will give you some good techniques a lot of good scriptural things to do now there's nothing wrong with cognitive behavioral therapy and a lot of techniques that people will recommend this is something that's really helped me great but what about your heart just avert your eyes is a shallow approach that the behavioral approach to a heart issue okay strike at the root of the thin issues pour yourself out to God and the Lord our God give me what is the point that the root of what is going on in my heart that's making me be attracted to this thing because there's some way that felt upon the throne of my heart instead of Christ I need to know what it is so I can surrender that to you the last embrace the lifelong process of sanctification in other words if you fall down again down wallow in the mud God does not cram your face into your failures does not thought he gets down beside you and I know how you feel Harry Kerry distance of the cross for you I already felt everything to feeling and all the others and the world are pressing on the one I don't give up you never conquered and he stopped getting up again this is a process it's not an event of sanctification there are thousands of events of sanctification on with your life find that you have to choose an item which is to be like Christ on it she is to follow my own sinful life Jesus Christ the realizing of Jesus Christ ten minutes later or the next day and is in the process don't be too hard on yourself or others who you're helping if they fall or if they find themselves not ready yet to surrender people need to believe that Jesus left them off and killed actually believe that Jesus loved them they're never going to even try until they see that the brokenhearted lover son of God that made them come down and suffer and carry that and knowing they wouldn't even be sorry to see just how much he loved them cannot be attracted to him instead he'll be harboring things like well why did God let that happen to me anyway if you so loving unbelief takes away your ability to overcome will be talking about that next section so embrace that lifelong process that realized you're going to find the keys to victory in striking at the root not just falling off the fruits him a lot of people take a lawnmower approach to dealing with sexual addiction plan to get rid of all those magazines you get rid of everything am usually my computer hey now not watching more movies not listening more music executives radical amputate everything approach but they don't get to the root issues and how I mean meeting my garden with a lawnmower when reading my garden with a lawnmower be very effective what if I said it all the way down to just scrape the grounds knowing you no man than I do that right there in the rationale until tomorrow this is the problem with many people approach to sexual addiction and this is my real problem with how many website and many books recommended to overcome they take this lawnmower approach stop doing all the things in her chair I approached those things are great the things are so youthful their biblical they can be like transforming but unless you get to the root you can find yourself continually going back again get to the root that God revealed the thoughts and motives of your heart right the word of God revealed to thought and motives of when you're craving because I put into use these cravings to love him and to be loved in return we have this tremendous God-given longings for love ability for work in college security and significant whatever it had the problem if we speak is that I longing without God and when we do that we are idolaters it's just a matter of times we fall back into sex or something else you may stop the sexual addiction the next thing you know you'll be eating effectively listening to music or calling a friend whatever it is you got it to the roof give yourself to Christ our idolatry were issues boil down to two things attempting to be God or attempting to replace God with someone or something else and those really come from to biblical concepts pride in unbelief we think that we can overcome things and therefore we don't turn to God or when we failed we think that God cannot deliver us the self-directed life is like this itself is on the throne of the heart and everything else around it is in chaos those were the Nokia verse can see the illustration but you've got the self sitting there in the middle and everything else in life can't seem to get workers Christ is outside of your life no matter how hard you try to never get yourself organized never be able to discipline yourself enough to get your life under control but the Christ directed life in contrast is when Christ upon the throne of the heart and sell it yielded to Christ then your interests are directed by Christ resulting in harmony with God and I want to close just by reading one quotation from Dietrich von offer who was martyred for his faith by the Nazis he never married but he lived a long life of freedom and joy in knowing him and he said the convention he is not the suppression of life but the total orientation of one's life toward a goal as you orient your life toward the goal of glorifying God instead of trying to find happiness and peace and enjoyment leisure you're going to find that the other things fall off when you pull the plant up by the roots believes with her up on their own online closeness with record of prayer that will have five minutes and begin again on our next seminar no not a lot of time so let's not has been there funny and we just lived up our hearts to you and that you will need to strengthen perfect in our weekly help us to be learned is you that's brilliant thank you we will see you issue of craving to make it you this message was recorded and is she wasting supporting ministry on the seventh day Adventist sequence by a young vibrant Bible makes price-sensitive Christians the downloadable purchase another resources visit the online and CYC when launching


Embed Code

Short URL