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Raising the Remnant

Scott Ritsema
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How do I help my children grow into spiritually strong young adults? Recent research has finally painted a remarkably clear portrait of the character, values, and practices of parents whose young adult children are now spiritual role models! How did these parents do it? Raising the Remnant uncovers the most exciting fact of all: this very same parenting counsel was given more than 100 years ago! You’re sure to walk away from this fast-paced, information-packed seminar with inspired, practical, and time-tested success strategies from real Christian families of today.

Presenter

Scott Ritsema

Founder and Speaker for Belt of Truth Ministries

Sponsor

Conference

Recorded

  • August 8, 2014
    10:45 AM
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but prayer selling modern enemy thank you so much for this opportunity to gather together and consider one of the most important topics that you have force in these last days and that is the training and education and parenting a bar of our children your children Lord we trust that you have a plan in store for us how perhaps conviction correction but also much encouragement the Lord we need direction from you today in Jesus name amen Linda seminars raising the remnants and the first thing are the dates that I always talk about when I do the parenting seminar is people look at this young guy in a safe parenting seminar age twenty five what's going on here but I'm not twenty five I know by all appearances you might think I just graduated from high school but at thirty three I do have a couple of kids and ER you can see here when you when this moment happens in your life how many of you have had that moment this changes everything for you doesn't that it changes your priorities you're what you're studying and looking into when this happened I began began to be a student of parenting I got into this in great depth and so when I come to you with a parenting seminar it is it with the gray-headed years of wisdom of having experienced this for decades it I I am your resident nerd okay I love information I love knowledge truth data studies research all of this and so I collected by study and I share with you but does that share with you my family photo album this moment and happens right the toddler learns how to sit perfectly still for long periods of time rights not so much that that is a long time to get that shot now is a distinguished gentlemen this is my son Levi and then the second comes along our little boy Silas Levi and Silas are now four years old and ten months old respectively is about eleven months old here in the summer of twenty fourteen and their best friends of course now I'm high I have to say I want to say is thank you to ASI for saying this topic is important enough we want this topic is to be featured at at ASI and I am honored as a privilege and it would be here to present what I think is the most important thing that we can even be talking about in these last days is how will the last generation of Earth 's history we parented there will be children to go through the last days as children and that's been my focus is he I I I believe that it serves the purpose of the enemy of souls to put a far off the closer time that Jesus will not come for five or ten or twenty more years and I believe it is imminent and that urgency that intensity is always needed on the part of God lastly people so my children I have a view that they will be going to the last days as children so how does that make me parents well that may change some things and it certainly has for me when and where I started what I obviously read through our spirit proxy councils on this job not done that get the child guidance to the cabin is home to read them immediately but also something that I written it up and read was a study that was done by the Barna group George Barney may have heard of him he does research and collect data for the evangelical Christian church broadly speaking and his research was interesting because he actually went out in search of spiritually strong young adults in America and ask them how were you raised so in other words what kind of parenting actually works were actually produces spiritually strong young adults and in our winter 's findings one by one by one about fifty every single finding could be also found in spirit of prophecy about the Sony to me not only to have this viewpoint on parenting validated from multiple sites but also as a a a validation or a increasing incredibility of spare prophecy when you see all the scientific studies backing up the health and health message when you see all the parents and councils being backed up by modern research is exciting to look back and say we has all online were not following these things will get back to those councils you know George Barna 's research has found that according to studies most parents think that they're doing a pretty good job you were going to be satisfied librarians in America uncertainly doing better than most of the blog that's however when you dig a little deeper and you ask these parents will unlock the different areas of parents and how you rank yourself in training your children academically the rank is open training your children socially your rank yourself and take care of their physical element how do you rank itself in spiritual training of your children all this is where parents could very insecure and they rank themselves literally in all the different areas that ringtones the last and spiritual training and this is on among Christians in the date America today we feel very insecure about training our children spiritually and so we turn to the school and the church to do what God has assigned to us is that working people are leaving the church young people leaving the church in great numbers in our community as well as the other face in America this is why this topic is important and in this is why want to look at parents who done it successfully address home actually recommends this address on page thirty one BC using this phrase guarding the home against Satanic influences by Shaw and Company want to guard your homes and satanic influence me to him knowledge address the sentence right here's how we got our homes against Satanic influence goes like this other families will mark the results attained by a godly home and will follow the example set in their turn guarding the home again significant was a sort of the sponsor to do exactly what Barnett has done go out in search of the godly homes Newmark the results and then do what they are doing or even more importantly he would God is asked us to do but they're the same thing beautifully enough now quick disclaimer about parenting from a spiritual point of view I can think of only one perfect parents in the history of the universe and with that those God God had a family in heaven a family of Angels to all of them stay loyal to him no one third of them rebelled against God because of free will so you can view everything right as God him that doesn't negate and shouldn't negate the free will about other youth or young adult so don't beat yourself up if you are an older person we get our Basson and ninety one audio mistakes all the failure and you carry on his guilt and shame God has forgiven you let the pass me the past if you have grown children if you have children and my age I look back man I was I wouldn't have know what God wanted to export only can do is look forward from here not backward we can learn from our mistakes that's what God has asked us to do but also remember that at the end of the day if your interior not in the older crowd with withdrawn kids God understands your pain he understands what it's like to lose children to rebellion and so I does want to encourage you in that regard I don't want the seminar to be well if you wanted on the ass then mouth God is and is and keeping a guilt upon you at all we can do our best selves are there tendencies and trends for how to give our children the best chances of success absolutely this is an just uphill press your luck kind of things is and is a gamble nominal there are lots of things we can do that will increase the chances of our children walking with the Lord strongly in the last days what you're going to hear over the next hour is a combination from multiple different things that we've been working on first of course raising the run and that's the name of of our talk today raising the remnant is a single session seventy five eighty minutes presentation that I did last summer which is available on DVD you can hear bits and pieces of that here today also we just released literally yesterday here at a aside how to raise the remnants this is a three disc documentary style parenting DVD set which features all of these wonderful parent in mind that you see on the screen hominids and Oser and on the clapping voluntarily take whose monks among others friends and and and and probably thought what to say the same guys help people walk through some of this information now how do we apply the things that are written spirit of prophecy and that been found by the Barna research and so that we are a three disc signal here some that do this in the session today also something is not yet released but it is recorded and were in the editing phase on it right now is a project called the classroom of the remnants this one had been working on with a friend of mine and Joshua White a expert a prominent researcher in child development early childhood education good friend of mine and you got solid information on how children that come to know the Lord and and develop a thinking critical mind and an hot hot raise and educate children so we're going here and here a little bit of the research from that as well and then just announced from of course media on the brain but were not going to get very deeply into that today but no hear from all for those over the next hour so let's get into it for some interesting text by the way how many flying company going really fast sizes and people get ready to take notes on the DVDs if you miss anything I'm not to say anything here that isn't on one of those for now those projects okay some interesting facts about these parents that George Barna study the parents that actually produced spiritually strong young adults the one that had success with it what would I like what are some interesting facts and the spiritually strong young adults most like mostly from rich families middle-class families poor families what you think 's I'm hearing all of them indeed it did not matter what your socioeconomic status what if you follow all the principles that he identified the other forty nine of them then socioeconomic status didn't didn't matter so you get your following the Lord 's plan it doesn't give you an advantage to be upper-middle-class if I was thought that if I got your middle-class values are upper-middle-class family and has given me some great advantage in parenting not so for family can do just as well as it was this the statement here because these parents who raise spiritually strong an adult they were more likely to come from deliberately single income households silver spirit of prophecy we read poverty in many cases is a blessing it prevents youth and children from being ruined by an action poverty is a lot as a blessing so there's no advantage to wealth when it comes to parenting our children that's it that's good news thankful hearts in time looks are more valuable than wealth and luxury and contentment with simple things will make home happy if love be the right answer is that they made it a priority were going to have one parent being a full-time parent here were going to be a single income households and logs can be in the home because the parent is full-time parenting get nobody's parents like number one they have a living face they have a real living faith in Jesus and they study the Bible to grasp principles for success in dancing maybe they came across Deuteronomy six ever read this one for Deuteronomy six verses six and seven it says and these words which I command you today shall be in your hearts you shall teach them diligently to your what do not to your children and you shall talk of them talk about what is them these words which I commanded to talk about talk of the word of God with your children when you sit in your house when you walk by the way when you are down and when you rise up to these parents look to the word of God for their guide for parents and not just that but we read from and in his own God himself established the family relation his word is the only safe guy in the management of children's actually look to the Bible for their parenting principles how do we parent let's go and ask God the disease even as inspiration in the word of God and the spirit of prophecy on how to parent not also noticed they had a living faith in Jesus was in his mother 's quotation from education it says in order to interest our children in the Bible we ourselves must be interested in it to awaken in them a lot for this study we must love it are instructions about what only have the weight of influence given it by our own example and spirit a strong statement they are not that his home for those listening to Eminem the word as much as we need to be in the children of his loving the word of God wow can we expect them to let these parents also what George Barna calls it the God talk that they had a lady is a lot of God talk meaning baby intermingled there there's their spiritual life with their daily experience it wasn't some empty phrases that they were using the big they really talked of Christ as if he was a real part of their life because he was we read in spirit of prophecy Christ is not a stranger in their homes his name is a household revered and glorified in my family would tautly vises he was very very young that there are certain members of our families mommy and daddy Levi and Silas came along and end of their other of the members were taught by Jesus mommy daddy Levi Silas Jesus denies getting the point where you talk about the father and the Holy Spirit this morning when I said to me we're doing our morning worship he said that Jesus is my real daddy is my pretend daddy like you want to find out a little bit more as he gets older with an acute dealer show in your life that Jesus is everything see if our children see this they are much more likely going to adopt the faith of Jesus Christ into their hearts into the license is real for us now these parents are also true beside the worst they don't just view their job as providing for the necessities of their children and taking care of their physical needs taken care of the sultan know it they are spiritually training their children their true design flares in the gauntlet to the church to take the lead in spiritual training they said this is our job we read this is very proxy and by our first and foremost the father the father is to dedicate every inmate of his home to God it is perilous to leave this solemn duty in the hands of others and that a strong statement is perilous for somebody else in the father to be the priest that child's development spiritually and of course it is no father in the situation mother is is the priest of that child appointed dealing with a single mom and that's that's necessity that's what what has to be done but single moms good parents never never parents alone bringing mentors bring in man is anybody that can help grandparents and and and and have a child see Christ and in others as well that are that he has a close close in the relationship but situation where the data 's home that is your job right there and then secondly date when they got into matters of faith they did as a family it was it had family worship these kinds of things as a family as we read in spirit of prophecy spread out the word of God before your families and laws and ask what God said so you ask them what is God said God is our God is our Lord are are are are ruler authority you know with this issue of family needs the family worship devotions helping our children really experience a walk with the Lord 's own attempt to the clip where you'll hear Polly Carolyn Reine commenting on this topic one of the most important things we can do from your children to help them to come to know Jesus as a friend for themselves when they release will not shoot with babies we would say that Scripture some tension and then and then he noticed deleterious into the wind realized their minds are like sponges and it was so couple comes their way naturally we can do so cut the road will readily than the good and so we just fill out our children's minds of good stuff that we didn't have so much room for the last of their mindset so start off with devotions with the release and will help connect their little hearts to their Savior and then as they get older they will come to him and they were a relationship will take them places we never could I do have thing that we a few know now that was family worship if we can set aside a little bit of time every day for reading the Bible together it will go a long way is that children are like sponges they just so cool he so beset the old upset his job 's parent company and it will come to fruition later on in life a minimum of big supporter of their ministry on restoration and rational there is seminar speakers that have a family retreats and wonderful stuff and in his letters I decide I have those children listening to the word of God from the time their babies we've been doing that will lead but these things are here we got a hold of from us by word creations and him and we seen these before the guy you know what these are summary these are incredible and they look like books are actually most of the reason we use it for was the CD in the back these are Scripture soft tissues were burned to death effects of the very same very same items that they were using I should ask them what you go through either get learns that the creation story from Genesis one learns Psalm twenty three Psalm ninety one Psalm one thirty nine all these wonderful scriptures about all of the angel of the Lord is is is protecting is the Lord 's prayer learning how to pray Isaiah fifty three to learn about the sacrifice of Christ the temptations of Jesus the ten Commandments first twenty thirteen you can read the Scriptures for being that the most foundational things to hide the word of God in the hearts of these the small children has only been playing these also since Levi was a baby and an end to the point where his two years Alden and learning to speak a little more fluently and what was already in his head is now coming out of his mouth and on why the new result launched a thousand better than we do sometimes we was a lot of Scripture songs not just these with other scripted songs and sometimes I'll be singing one and all I'll I'll I'll forget the words of the Levi he ignored by two half three when he was helping me to say data goes like a side singer Ronnie catch me anything that it's actually been tested so they have like I said sponges and we got feedback from the desktop by the way over at our exhibit booth I don't have these laying out on the on the table but I brought some of these if you're wanting to share those with your children want to get those and those watching videos available on the website but getting back to the information here why is there such a lack of missionary spirit in our churches this is due to privacy quotes and asks a question we are all asking why is Laodicea so when it is the why are we not getting out there sharing the word of God would result in seeing Jesus come in our day here's the answer you're why is there such a lack of missionary spirit in the church is today it is because there is a neglect of home financing you can't lay this at the doors the schools the church this starts in the home and if we're not doing it in a home that is not going to take root to discipleship number three these parents actually serve God together with their kids they engaged in service projects I love the nostrums example of this eligibility Herbert is the moment when and how to have a devotional time how to prepare time you weren't actually actually go out and practice it in the community who wanted them to share their faith to children putting the foot they were letting go at seven years of age in fact I got alike are older than six years old and she wanted to get by with any action in the region for hydrogen at a related and I gave her some contacts that she could use to get Bible studies knocking on doors and asking anybody should care if they would get that her Dennis started to them people do not telephone -year-old no data that identifies a study that was the way that she got to share with people she actually say youth group Bible study group into the nineteen shadow of a correspondence school that she and I got a hat of babysitting the history and a truck listed accident she call a parents and see if she could volunteer some time to take care of their children so they can get a house cleaner how both of them felt the cold Porter and and and papal works for a ministry that was a bookstore and defined his time they had a lot of opportunities to share how I mentioned the beginning that we're looking at raising a generation of children that may go through the very last days as children right this statement great controversies actually quoted from evidence on here will be away the first time I read this is this is heavy stuff listen to this one we read when heavenly intelligences see that men are no longer permitted to present the truth the Spirit of God will come upon the children and they will do a work in the proclamation of the true which the older workers cannot do because their way will be headshot in the closing scenes of the earth history many of these children and youth will astonish people by their witness to the truth which will be born and simplicity yet with spirit and power in the near future many children will be ended with a spirit automobile work proclaiming the truth to the world at that time cannot well be done by the older members of the church to hear that brothers and sisters are our children being raised up serving on doing missionary work reaching out to the needy Rich and all the lost souls if they are doing that they will be the chosen ones to do this the very last messages a morning right before the close of original because my children that amazing this happen by the way already in history in the Reformation and the second Advent awakening movements a great add-on movements read about that in the great controversies can happen again in the closing scenes of this is history powerful another way to these parents were true disciple is that their children saw that the parents who lived in what they were asking on their children the parent to live their faith this is very very very important and I want to hear from our experts on this one one more click here two children get older comment when you began to mock something that you learned in your time with God today helps them know that you have that time and that meant something to you Prince silently each files your children will pick up your faith or lack of say they will take out what you say what you do how do you control your emotions how do you say things to them that will give them on an accurate picture of your face so you never pick up your Bible and I think you you know I have a very strong faith needs her relationship with him her first film we always deprive the defendant of the militia but we were more intent on it only moved onto the country we want to make sure it wasn't erratic after they decide to have it hidden then we decided that it would be anti-gay and anti- children were watching how they learned how to pray they watch their father in the morning and night said that they would understand that he always set them before the Lord so even the next two years when they are struggling and failing that the father to pray for them that modeling is about the most important thing that we can do real it's been said that children will children will not go any deeper in their face than their parents aren't they won't walk with Jesus and any more series on the way than their parents are and so we got a set that bar high for our children by the way to speakers that you just heard that the first was Doctor .com in the second one on Doctor Kay Krusemark and the third once in a surrendered as parenting seminars these are excellent resources and you find their books and materials out there they that are dead turn to the many times four for counseling wisdom on this on the subject but you heard him say what we are living the children will pick up more than what we say writers who we are and so what kind of apposition may have as parents you almost never in research do you find one hundred percent of people in agreement on anything but in this case these successful parents one hundred percent of them had the character development of their children as their number one priority and focus the character development of the children was number one and so college degrees careers intellectual economic advancement these things were not the most importance that's not to say that academic things are unimportant but they are not the most important not even close the most important by far in the development of that child's character and so we have secured a prophecy on this many are turned aside by wrong methods of what education so we emphasize the academic life is to generally regard is made up of distinct areas of learning undoing the property of preparation and achievement so we have these these categories in our lives this is the category for study and academics and then over here we are practical lies and they are disconnected they are disjointed and so what happens is our ideas in education take too narrow and too low arrange true education has to do with the whole meeting with the whole period of existence possible to man our whole being and our whole lives are education I love that concept that's very much emphasized in the classroom the run in the eight date disc series my friend Joshua White and I put together he's a speaker on that that is an excellent excellent stop because educated women broaden our view of education am a teacher that that's what I'd gone for eleven years of my and my career education is not just what happens when you're in a book and in the classroom and in studying education is all of life is a whole range of the mind-body everything in the whole period of existence known to man and listen to how Jesus learned was in his is education Jesus 's education was gained from heaven directly from heaven appointed sources tell us that without a point the sources are useful work the study of the Scriptures the study of nature and the experiences of life isn't that interesting I wonder sometimes if we and we spent far too much time in class trips we spent far too much time in formal academic experiences Jesus for having appointed sources of his education study of nature which by the way to get from booking and classroom study of God which books in classrooms also daily life experiences and from real practical work was his education very interesting now when you look at Doctor Jane Hailey Edward Everett heard of Doctor Jane Hailey wonderful researcher and in the secular realm but what she has pointed out from her research on childhood development is that academical knowledge rather than being based on academic knowledge Sirs actually shows that your child ultimate success this success not based on academic knowledge but it will depend in life will depend more on personal characteristics like motivation creativity the ability communicate effectively with other people softly want to be successful even in temporal terms even if you don't in our jobs and our lives in this world it's not necessarily how much time was spent in the classroom is not a silly how much book knowledge we have army raising our children but that practical knowledge words about how they communicate their motivation and creativity meetings are essential these grants help not only did they focus on the character character character character they didn't negate academics or children learned those are important things the character was number one and an end that is a perfect segue into how absolutely revolutionary these parents were the parents who raise the spiritually strong young adults in America today their number one priority their number one job in life was the parenting of their children parenting is my primary job and like any any necessary career actually exists primarily as a means to that end submitted outsourcer parenting if you will to the media our children fifty three hours a week in front of screens that they didn't outsource their parenting to teachers churches media entertainment they said I am the parents of this child this is my most important job in life is that my primary aim and identity during my child childhood years and that's just weird in our culture today right and we get busy we all have our own thing and its outcome takes second place here takes a second fiddle if you will but these parents into this includes fathers that a lot of dads of course that the workable Sullivan of the work outside the home in some cases it's moms outside on the dad dads at at the home with the kids but you have one parent at least working here but still their mindset is parenting is my primary job and so you know what that that means other things may have to go get in that second I have a bunch of quotations on this that really spoke to me as apparent as I was evaluating my and my new identity my new role when I had my first three years ago this was what we to go I am now for the next number of years why have these children and says how sad it is that many parents have cast off their God-given responsibilities to their children and are willing that strangers should bear it for them they are willing to others should bear for their children and relieve them of all to labor for their children and relieve them of all burden in the matter the mother has in her power modules into this you have in your power the molding of your children's characters that they may be fitted for the higher immortal life this is the sentence an angel could not ask for a higher mission next to God the mother 's power for good is the strongest known on earth do you realize what you just read moms let me give you the order of the order here are the most powerful agency in the universe of course is the creator of the universe God but you'll comes next honors moms that after moms comes Angels and the rest of God moms Angels the rest of us in terms of the influence you can have over the characters fitting them for the heavenly immortal life and Angel do not ask for a higher mission is powerful that's wonderful I love you if you ignore your duty as wife and mother and hold out your hands for the Lord to put another class award in them be sure that he will not contradict himself he points you to the duty-bound to do it home if you have the idea that somewhere greater and holier than this has been entrusted to you you are under the section of the effort me they got from the spirits this is a somebody's opinion this is the spirit of prophecy I've heard many times Ottawa Europe was very prompt and want here the spirit of prophecy to realize what that sentence is saying I don't want to get a spirit is not about a person who wrote this a hundred plus years ago this is from the Holy Spirit sense of vitality of spirits a proxy that's a very dangerous statement so but again don't I I I will say things like that people discussed the ride out of the ugly that you got when you set strong seems to us like you're under a deception if you think it is not your primary job in life right now so I think that from your loving heavenly father he says those whom I love I rebuke and discipline and so he speaks very strongly to us sometimes but by the way this is not just moms this is this is the data ready for now golf is it says I saw that but a few fathers realize their responsibility the father 's duty to his children cannot be transferred to the mother if she performs her own dirty she has burdened enough to bear and I get an amen from the ladies on this and from the guys I made these ladies are the hardest working people on planet Earth moms are either I never see my wife's incredible person more respect for women now than ever did before only by working in unison can the father and mother accomplish the work which God is committed to the hands and I like this with the children not his as well as ours could hear fathers this one all members will knock my socks off this is probably the quota change my view of my role more than anything else fathers spend as much time as possible with your children is in the Garden of Eden that would've been leaving four forty fifty hours a week to go to a job because the curse your knowledge about it's one of your valued habit the thorns and vessels and all that so what is a part of the lot of mankind it is a blessing but I wonder of God 's original design and anyone were in heaven is actually the families doing that work together and that dad is more a more integral part the more we can move toward that the better and I not try to put a burden on men's and no no not for search cause and provide for their families that's what God has called us to do we have to do that in some cases as them on the menu that ended at the home preferably the mother but here's the council spent as much time as possible don't go beyond possible and start stressing yourself out in in in in in go go extreme but as much as we can find to find some of our children we have to be doing that if he is engaged if the father is engaged in the business was almost wholly closes the door of usefulness to his family listened and asked should seek other employment which is not prevent him from devoting some time to his children if he neglects them he is unfaithful to the trust committed to them of God writing the character of his business it is not so great importance that he needs used in neglecting the work of educating and training his children to keep the way of the Lord in my own personal life this is the challenge of some a teacher out teaching full time and doing as many on the brain message on salicylates are going well we got a baby here and things are starting to change sides that you are legally full-time teaching decided to step out the part-time teaching last year and now full-time zero time teaching and in doing this ministry full-time if you will so that if I'm gone away from the family for the office of the fly we gone for three days client Friday finance on a speaker on Sabbath somewhere around the country and meanwhile boy I'm missing some very important time of the families of those other days focus on the family and that's what we all need to do as much time as possible with our children and need to seek other employment I was why I said and what the Lord is calling me into the ministry digit to talk about media and entertainment on a different church every weekend sharing this message so many doors open that's that obvious calling at that point and I know what I can be that into each full-time the same time if I did I would be unfaithful to the trust that God is given to seek other employment by the FSC drag finding is Gonzaga used to get Gill opened the door if he doesn't open the door then you don't need the stress and say I'm a bad dad because I have to work so much you seek it and God Wolf dog will find CNN's Ben and he will show usually you will you open up the door that he wills for you to talk to walk through so seek other primary interest in a second way of these parents are true revolutionaries is the actually spent hours in dialogue with their children each day they did talk with the children for hours and it was a surprising finding to because we all get so busy right we were were were doing this were on our phone were going to work for documents on many were over here over there this was maxed out were overcommitted were very very busy in life will give you read that the mother must understand preeminence in this work of training the children while grave and important duties rest upon the father the mother by almost constant association with the especially during their tender years must always be there special instructor in companion almost constant no more we are now on our devices we are busy and endless vistas need for that small child to be bonded and and and how that attachment with mother we are losing out on important foundation for those youngest of children she usually important but where they learn language skills by talking they don't my mind was filled by hearing words on the TV or even an audio they learn language filled by interpersonal and white language skills are important language is the stuff of thought right language is how you learn academically later in life language site comprehend biblical truth one what is I you communicate truth throughout his language is the foundation of all learning for the rest of your life even spiritual learning and so learning good language that was very important during those earliest years talking with your children for hours a day but it's not the smallest fathers cultivate friendship with them especially with your sons in this way he will be a strong influence for good and we also read no times at the father I have no time to get to the training of my children have no time for social and domestic enjoyments then you should not have taken upon yourself the responsibility of a family by withholding from them the time which is justly there's the problem of the education which they should have at your hands if you have children you have a work to do in union with the mother and the formation of their characters it is the drive many mothers I have no time to be with my children then for Christ's sake spent less time on your dress neglected he will to adorn your apparel I'm guessing ladies in your undoing all that much of adorning their apparel so you can put that 21st-century spin out and like to be on Facebook and want to have those socialist is a segment like to receive and make all the mean social but whatever it is is getting in the way neglected cook an endless variety of dishes but never never neglect their children what is the chapter the weight nothing interpose between you and the best interests of your children I want back to that that that statement right there by the way it's not just the quantity of time it's also the quality of time Diablo receiving about have been quality time with my kids and that was that was a trend of couple of decades ago where you even have your busy life and you spend ten minutes of the yard throw the frisbee around you feel like at the parenting duties on I spent quality time it was just microns of time it was quality the researcher Jean the quality time in small amounts is not is not sufficient need quantity of time but if you just add quantity of time it's not good quality you do do treating it showed disrespect the kindness of a home was an atmosphere love and joy that's not actually being very cut either so you want quantity and quality both a third way that these parents are revolutionary is that they sacrifice their own experiences that they rather happen I'll be honest sometimes frankly doing that thing with a small child that is just like fascinating to him sometimes I don't importance and we done that nineteen times out of a habit I have a different level of interest in stimulation intellectually than a three -year-old and so I have to say Lord help me to sacrifice self and to do with us for this child and to enjoy the child on Justin Britt might even go through but to really enjoy being with them because I don't think that I might rather do but this is way more important cut out everything else from your life that prevents this work from being done and train your children after his order to neglect anything in a temporal nature to be satisfied to live economically buying about your wants but for Christ's sake again do not neglect the religious training of yourselves and your children did you notice is not economically remember it didn't matter about the socioeconomic status of the families and we actually read and spirit of prophecy that poverty can be a blessing I know that a lot of people are normal we can't go down to one income we can't knew what these guys are doing because many bald incomes derived and sometimes that's more of a perceived situation in a real situation I don't know your situation I think sometimes it is not all was for us we had the house in the suburbs actually right here Grand Rapids suburban Ramsey at a decent house not matter that is a middle-class house locally Michigan hundred twenty thousand dollar house rights I thought even around the country but you know around there is no invention in the in California and elsewhere real estate is real nice but in Michigan don't we mortgage and were going okay we're now committed to going on a one income how do we do it since that worthy the example as an example of what we do is reset we need to have no mortgage that's the reason we need to pull off in order for a teacher to be a will to continue to support his family not to mention somebody was non- Linden ministry work that's even less on so how do we do that well we need to we need to have no debt so now we weave always driven like fifteen hundred dollars cars assisted-living to buy a sentence that was easy but they know no credit car that we wanted to get rid of organisms that were to sell his house and we felt on the country living as all other seminar at their work on next year but we moved in a country we started looking at country homes it's amazing what you can find like an hour north of Grand Rapids we found nine acres with entry is a pond at the mobile home test is a mobile holiday so we got it all come to terms with that but we found this place woods for burning for he and all that said the guide wrong food we can limit very economically by Nevada wants to buy the place of forty seven thousand dollars an week we had not been able to have children for years the Lord worked a miracle to bring his children to us and so we had some savings built up an relevant cash now with no mortgage we say now we can do the one income thanks and that requires a sacrifice to the wild animal Park I like not having a garage or basement no but she knows it is important to note that these children are worth it so praise the Lord for moms that are willing sacrifice number four these guys they are so revolutionary they did something that actually woods in violation of the rights and how to involve yourself in your child's choice of friends is not in violation of the right they don't have the freedom to choose their own associate that is your responsibility as parents attendees benefited that they said were not going to do is let them play with her and be with anybody is going to a bad influence on numbers as their prophecy on this to my voice reach the parents all through the land as a strong traffic the twentieth arrest here's what I would say if I could speak to everybody throughout the land here's what the spirit of prophecy would tell them I would warn them not to yield to the desires of the children in choosing their companions or associates and that something little did parents consider that injurious impressions are far more readily received by the young than on divine impressions we go on and seek to let them associate with those that love God let them bring them to the people of God as children whom you are seeking to help build characters for eternity it is impossible to overestimate the importance for this world and the next of the associations we choose for our children we are in the world this is a people say they say oh come on Scott you're telling them somehow don't looking on where in the world were in the world and so you can't get out of it so they're just going to have to be exposed to all of these worldly things and the media and the Associates and all of this just realize were living in the next they had to say something like that to results through proxy addresses this very question we are in the world they say we cannot get out of it here's what we see the parents we can get a good way of the world if we choose to do so we can avoid seeing many of the evils that are multiply so vast in these last days we can avoid hearing about much of the wickedness and crime that exists now we also read I have been shown that there should be a sacred shield around every family I love this time of a shield because I was thinking about it if you're holding a shield it was kind of curved like this rants and indicated that she was as storm begins a a brainstorming in the individually woman over your head like this makes a nice little roof right and we call that is that she'll be called at a shelter and I've heard this word shall serve the music I use it when I was against me is to make fun of what the homeschooled kids on the street who weren't allowed to go trick-or-treating on Halloween or go to the movies or whatever type drop administers on the same dynamic that and so with all those guys are so sheltered and and and now that I look back was silly and foolish and nonsensical thing to say it's like there's a storm of worldly syndrome is going on and were standing out and hammered on I wonder SL through it even if that's obviously what you do at the star to watch out there I think that where there sensibly says to concerns that are sheltering your children a little bit ability noticed that we are trying to which I didn't tell me about some of the ways that your shelter your kids will learn how to do it better that's a compliment right to take that word back Doctor Jane Haley has a mouth to say about this too because the funny thing about with the way he is not funny and sad the way that things go in our culture today is we don't shelter our children from the evils but then we try to hover over them and protect them from every little mistake that roommate in which we micromanage their little eyes was it all don't do it that way I'll do it this way you enough time to work archival Juergen I even hurt your disciple of novels we don't want our children to get into life-threatening original major injury situations and make mistakes that's how they learn right and in a doctor 's inhaling is studied it extensively children she wrote this since I have worked with children who are afraid to attempt even simple tasks because mom is a way jumped in and on the job for them and that's one of the ways that would train children to be self-reliant to grow op is let them make mistakes let them learn to do things that are hard for themselves and that's an hard for us to watch you know what you let them put the pants on backwards and I'll let them put them to screw the cap on backwards and one right and that will learn no figure it out you don't have to always jump in let the child and the youth being taught that every mistake every fault every difficulty conquered becomes a stepping stone to better and higher things it is through such experiences that all that ever made life worth living have achieved success so these parents are different another way that they are revolutionaries not only that they protect their children from worldly influences and in and out of peers but they actually protect their children from all worldly influences and they are very concerned about that the fact that their countercultural and his parents are weird I is different but that causes a little stress or consent except that from day one of the dancing would be different from most reasons were processing there should be less careful what the outside were will say more thoughtful attention to the members of the family circle what's best for my family I don't care what other people or things in here we also read the votaries of fashion will never see or understand the immortal beauty of that Christian mothers work and will sneer at her old-fashioned notions and a plain unadorned dress when the Majesty of Heaven who write the name of that faithful mother in the book of immortal thing we want to please anyway the sister-in-law the mother of a friend on the road the lady in charge for the Majesty in heaven their angels in our homes right and were being specific enough for the society of heavenly angels when I speak to use unless the hotel and guide you interested in was cool like in your in your culture of youth or in the popular music or whatever I'm a lot more interested in what's cool in heaven because that's what I want to fit in that's where I want to be a part of right now want and what is Gabriel think is cool collected in a pool that is I don't care what people think anymore so we got to be revolutionaries about this in a fifth way media consumption these parents that raised Beardsley strong young adults headstrong and strict media standards for their children that in many cases getting rid of TV altogether this is the evangelical Christian world is not even Adventist records as as evidence we know that many quotations in the media on the brain seminar that bring in the idea that spare prophecy actually warned us a hundred years ago against things like the article dealt with in attainment games hypnotic devices these things work work work warning us already for twenty first century deceptions as the media is actually it are not to talk about it you probably I've mentioned earlier fifty three hours a week is the average screen time for American children on their nineteen million videogame addicts in America today and are five million Americans playing over forty hours of video games per week so working as a serious serious issues in our in our world today and in in our church as well I did a study of seven feminist youth where I asked them to report anonymously to me how much time they were spending on TV and movies and video games and how much time they're spending on devotions Bible study and prayer ratio was twenty five to one worldly food to spiritual foods we have a problem major problem with media and we got a be able to take a stand and say we're not going to trip the way that the world does it six of all the legions often resisted certain things because well we're different right were different from our friends here my friends get to do this and that my friends don't have to do that but then stuck to their guns they said this is overdue because this is right this is what the Lord has asked us to do but should this is not new by the way a hundred years ago the children referred to other children who knowing how many privileges wholesale self you are without a mother fearing that her children will think are unjust gratifies there which wishes which in turn in the end proves a great injury to young visitors who have not advanced watchful eye over them to see and correct the faults often receive impressions which will take months to remove these bands are very very very revolutionary as we've seen that but at the same time they're not like running around letting their hair and firing ongoing fanatical about their very balanced if you are readable child guidance the compilers of that were brilliance they brought in statement one statement here one statement there which bring a beautiful beautiful balance and harmony to our parenting so that we don't add up on off on some tangent wing over here or over here and so the parents had a balanced approach number one the first weather amounts for dispensing time on this one in the course of spending the time of the child listening to the child was very very important issue usually important for the emotional development of the attachment of a child to mother that you are a responsive mother and responsive to their answer needs to their to their emotional needs and ending your listener immediately see what they say in years onto it that's why you get dialogue on writing understanding directions and printing some lectures at your having that openness parents and encouraging their children to encourage their children to confide in them and unburdened to and on their heart brings there little daily annoyances and trials kindly instruct them and bind them to your hearts teach them to regular confidante let them whisper in your ear their trials and joys than you think by the way that they're going to be willing to do that stealing is wrong to feel an openness to do that if they're being criticized all the time if we just barking at them and in putting them down the field open and not available on blizzard is that hard not that we want that openness we got to encourage them to unburden our hearts and the like is when children would be safe for many evils if they were more familiar with their parents as managers think parents are encouraging their children the disposition to be open and frank with them to come to them with their difficulties and when they are perplexed as to what course is right to lay the matter just as they knew it before the parents and ask their advice is not a wonderful thing and by the way Goodchild opens up and they been doing something is wrong do not at that moment get nonetheless in the lecture because that's convincing Coles Myer for the next you will need to do that instruction you will need to be that guiding but they're opening up in it saying you know what I I am feeling a little bit bad about something and I did you don't come down on them hard their arty opening on their confessing twenty oh four Lord we confess our sins busy busy start pointing his finger down our nose and say you must stop why did you do it that way come on now they've Artie reach the point of repentance and confession your gentleness is needed here to guide them at that point or else shut them down you should take time off and pray with your little ones this is so important to talk and pray with your little ones to plug my computer gear and allow nothing to interrupt that season of communion with God and with your children nothing should interrupt the second ladies dance of balance is they avoided being too soft and touchy-feely but also they avoid being too intimidated they found the sweet spot right in the middle technology or take whose month PhD an child element talk about this very topic what makes positive feelings in or you can be a benevolent dictator I seems like a massive moron you know it is impossible that that is exactly what children need to need to know that they are absolutely love no matter what and that's a soft side you may need to know that you have boundaries you have rules that need to be cast out you are strong enough to make sure that you keep that they do those things and I have used for many many years the idea that the child one thing to do and then make sure you follow through so that balance between being what I call having a gentle trash but having strong boundaries and when kids see that with Ian and their parents in each one of their parents that will be the child will become the strongest in terms of the spiritual development in terms of their spirituality you have to be strong in values and be able to stand up for what needs to be done but you will also be loving and understanding and when you can get back to gather and respect each other it's amazing that the notice she said both parents are that way a lot of times visit we balance each other out you'll nonstop that's hard for the other way around that confuses it's not good that is not healthy both of you need to find a balance of what Christ websites crisis firm principled standards weren't as high as the character of himself right but the love of Christ in the gentleness and the end of the concern and the empathy and compassion and was also equally high insulin certain to blend those do not balance and blend them into the defense is sometimes and this was sometimes on that way that's confusing right so were always kind to our children were always disciplining and lots him authority and a flat affection be whether his work blended fathers combining affection with authority kindness and sympathy with firm restraint the third way these parents work balance is that the children knew the parents were the bosses and were in in in controller in charge so they're not so so weak and flimsy they knew as you do certain takers not that they are in control that one mother said I'm not a control person by nature this is enjoyed on his research but when you have little ones depending on you for direction you learn pretty quickly how important it is to be the leader and indeed a father said this one is that I think I been able to get away with being the boss because deep down the kids want to be interviewed to be in control related a father of three they periodically just need to see if I'm not that it's still up to the challenge but the bottom line is they want to have the confidence that the old man is capable of holding the job once I proved over and over again I can do it and I intend to retain the leadership role he can relax and feel as if everything is in balance in their universe that's the only thing they test the fence as we call it in my home they they they want to make sure they want to see where the line is not overly biweekly and really doesn't get up on the coffee table is not allowed to climb up there and so he'll look at us and it was agreed as to when he put his knee up there like base of a mountain out of this allowed a little verbalize that they don't ask permission this is the way they do it you let them know with much communication where the lines are and you're an authoritative parents in that respect not an authoritarian parents but also not allowed some some sort of wishy-washy situation where they don't know where the lines are than they get confused and they get scared and advanced so much freedom they don't know what to do with anything insecure home so they need to know where those lines are uniform firmness and compassion control are necessary and the discipline of every family say what you mean how calmly move with consideration and carry out what you say without what deviation is a beautiful picture so balance number five these parents own a part here for a while this issue important if you are meeting your child's physical and emotional needs a lot and back I'd venture to say the majority of the misbehavior that you might be witnessing ten can disappear and vanish and it will become angels in that moment but a lot of misbehaviors because these needs are not being met but not getting enough attention they are there most Derrida strongly with her emotions they don't deal with fact that the amount of sleep this kind of thing you see so much more misbehavior when the physical and emotional needs are not being met and so you read here from spare process of my favorite quotes I love that young children love companionship and can sell them enjoy themselves alone they yearn for Cynthia and tenderness that which they enjoy that people please mother also and it is natural for them to go to her with a little joys and sorrows the mother should not invest sensitive hearts training within difference matters that no trifling to her are of great importance to the children her sympathy and approval our precious and approving glance a word of encouragement accommodation can be like sunshine in our hearts often making the whole day I love that I love that statement help that child know that the things they think important port and are important to you too and that along with command your children whenever possible make their lives as happy as possible remember that children need not only reproof and correction but encouragement and commendation the pleasant sunshine of kind words but we aren't just given building our children on the singer the greatest are the smartest of the most party a disconsolate prison unless that is what children need appreciation yes Symphony asked encouragement yes but care should be taken not to foster in them a love of praise you know how you give childless a good set healthy sense of self-worth is your worthy of my time children's dialogue not LOD unless a lot of TV I am in your that one before and its culture it also allowed by your you turn your back to all you the greatest thing ever and him and go do something else not the love appraised is an insecure sort self-awareness we need to have a feeling of self-worth because they need somebody to us to spend our time is also what else are we commending him for look at this one like every mother teacher children but they are members of the family farm and it must bear their share of the responsibility on this from and that they get a satisfaction right to satisfaction the children will haven't been useful and in denying themselves to help others will be the most helpful pleasure they ever enjoy to win a family farm we have Georgia responsible Israel daily duties most of life in the home for a family are doing a lot of work involved the kids in that constantly switch it can be with mother doing all these things happened then important responsibilities you need to do this if you don't do this is not to get done there are real consequences in the family so what else is going to be inconvenienced in some way if you don't do that it's a nice time so yeah I have a role to play I'm understanding my individuality myself what I mean something in this family that when you commend them with a simple thank you you'll have to build them up with all this artificial praise they are the internal rather than the extrinsic and intrinsic sense of motivation and self worth that is huge for the development of those children listen to this one this is so ironic those children from parents do the most to you in everything for your child they actually feel under the least obligation to where you think I'll may they mail me the most gratitude because I did so much for the no Pentagon soil that has a lid they feel is right and is is that I is owed to me in life well not so we want to make sure that they take ownership of things themselves there was an interesting study on this in this topic people might say what you doing going back to that child labor era of the late nineteenth century of development have no abuse of jnana not anything like that we want to have them have responsibilities but then people will say our analysis can cause hardship to answer what you do with this issue of hardship wickedness this is amazing that the committee to study where they look at three groups of people experience no child in adversity people experiencing moderate childhood adversity and people had experienced severe adversity such as abuse filed at OSU question of those three groups which group do you think the greatest well-being mental well-being emotional well-being as adults which ones were able to handle stress the best situations in life and challenges in life the best it is number to the moderate adversity groups we want our children to experience some challenges in life moderate adversity because they take him out with the higher mental health well-being life satisfaction the release affected by recent adverse events they were more optimistic there are more emotionally stable and there were able to depend on difficult strategies and minors are difficult stressors and minor challenges is not something so having moderate adversity as a child is actually good think all of this research is presented much more thoroughly in the classroom is run by Joshua light but I wanted to bring it in now one more on the self most interestingly this is incredible those who experienced no adversity actually perform the same during later stress tests as those who had experienced severe adversity are you hearing what this is saying if we give our children the easy life the silver spoon and all of that if they don't have to work if they don't have challenges that they have to overcome on the do everything for them that's like child abuse their ability to handle life will be as bad as someone who experienced abuse so that's not serious serious stuff right there this research uncovered we really spirit of prophecy it is obstacles that make men strong not helps with difficulties conflicts rebuffs that make men of moral singing for the second time I would make a really important point felt when I say your children need experience hardships that doesn't mean harshness hardships never mean harshness of borrowing from a good friend Joshua light powerful important statement in a heated if you will have origins in order for the extreme on this and become harsh baritone from distant from the hardship never means separation either God says I will never leave you nor forsake you he lets his face challenges but he's always there with us through it so that's important as a disclaimer and those that those are some of the emotional needs about the physical needs hated adequate nutrition and sleep this one the health cannot be preserved unless some portion of each day is given to muscular exertion in the opener stated hours should be devoted to manual labor of some kind stated what powers parents in action is the greatest curse that ever came up on you equalize taxation of the mental and physical powers equalized very just and the mind of the students those older kids do will be refreshed the health should be as sacredly guarded as the character also these parents have the goal to teach their children to think independently this is so important as an educator my education philosophy even before I was a seven-day Adventist business thi

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