Michigan Camp Meeting 2018: As a Witness, Matthew 24:14

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Michigan Conference of Seventh-day Adventists

To Have and to Hold on

John Lomacang

Becoming One - Part 1

Loving Father in heaven, I thank you so much that you are the God who created marriage.

You are not just the God of love, but you are love.

And Lord, as we talk about relationships this week, Father, I want to first pause and thank you for our marriage, for how you have kept us through the years in our uptimes and downtimes, in our valleys as well as our mountaintops.

You have kept us and you brought us to this place where today we can not only celebrate your grace and your mercy and your strength, but we can celebrate the beautiful gift of marriage.

Be with us, Lord, this afternoon and also during the week as we grow together, as we smile, as we learn things together, as we have times where the moments will be very serious and other moments where they will bring a smile.

We ask for your spirit to guide and for all your purposes to be accomplished.

Now I want to begin with some things to smile about because when we did this seminar in Crystal Mountain, I like to begin with something to make you smile because we tend to be very, very serious.

But if you've been married any length of time you know that there's a lot of humor in relationships there are many days my wife and I we laugh every day we either laugh with each other we either laugh at each other or we laugh at other people.

We have church members that make us laugh.

We've grown through moments of celebration.

We have learned when the times come when you want to throw in the towel, we have learned to go to our knees.

We have learned that when the enemy comes at us with all the fury and tries to separate us.

We serve a God that can still keep us together.

And so marriage is not something that happens automatically.

Marriage is like a job that every morning you show up to work.

And I know there's some of you that have been married a long time.

We met a couple just recently that was just married.

And my wife and I, sometimes we see young married couples and we say this, they haven't got a clue.

But God created marriage like He created the Sabbath.

To be a symbol of the relationship between us and him.

But I want to begin with some things that will make you smile because through the years I thought that laughter is medicine and listen to some of these dialogues, something to make you smile and then we'll get really deadly serious in a moment.

But here's 1, A wife to husband, this is a statement, wife to husband, I'm staying in this marriage because I believe that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Husband to the wife, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.

You may have heard about this person before.

She says, if marriage is so great, why do they call it an institution?

Well, my wife and I have been in the institution of marriage for 35 years.

Can anybody else praise the Lord for that?

Now we're going to work through some of the difficulties, some of the difficult things also.

A lady by the name of Helen Rowland said, in Bible times, sacrifices were made at the altar, a practice that still continues.

Because when you are married, there are certain things you've got to sacrifice that is in you.

And when you learn the blessing of sacrificing the things that can sacrifice your marriage, then you learn the principles of growth.

When I met my wife, she was not crazy about basketball and I was not crazy about malls.

Now I like malls and she likes basketball.

We have learned to play games together, we travel together, we have worked at 3 companies together, same companies.

We traveled for 2 years in a row, every day in the same room, on the same bus, in the same location and we still travel together.

And I've wondered to myself how many marriages are strong enough for husband and wife to share the same space every day, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

We're going to talk about how to do that.

Another 1 that came to my mind, and you've heard this guy, he'll be the last 1, because I know he's a very famous person.

Rodney Dangerfield said, and just forget the HG, he said, my wife and I were happy for 20 years, then we met.

We're going to talk about what it means to be happy in marriage, But let's start with the definition of marriage.

1, marriage is a divine revelation in human vessels.

Marriage is a divine revelation in human vessels.

If God didn't think that marriage was a good thing, he would not have created marriage.

In other words, the marriage is intended to show the relationship between God and his church, between the husband and the wife.

The Apostle Paul communicates it this way.

Ephesians 5, verse 22, notice what the Bible says.

Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord.

Continuing, for the husband is the head of the wife, also as Christ is the head of the church and he is the savior of the body.

And what that means when you study the Bible, it doesn't mean that Eve was taken from Adam's foot and he represents the head or he's got his feet on top of her.

For Adam and Eve to be side by side in their relationship with God.

But when sin entered the world, Genesis chapter 3 says, that the desire of the wife shall be for her husband.

And so the Lord established a principle that will continue through years to show the relationship between God and the Church, between the Church and our Heavenly Father.

Ephesians 5, verse 24, therefore just as Christ is subject, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in how many things?

And that means when a husband, and this is something I want to begin with, when a husband represents the godly priest that the Lord intends for the husband to be, then it makes it a lot easier for the wife to be subject to the husband in everything.

And my wife and I have learned those principles very well.

As a pastor, my schedule gets very, very busy sometimes.

And there are days when I come home and I really am tired from studying or visiting or preaching or doing programs as it is at 3ABN, and I'm just exhausted.

And my wife in the evening would say, honey, let's read our Bible together, or let's do a devotional together.

So what we've learned through the years is when I'm weak, she's strong.

And what we have learned is the marriage is not 1 in control of the other, but both allowing Christ to be in control of them.

Look at a few more principles that the Bible makes very clear.

Marriage is not only a divine revelation in human vessels, but marriage is a reflection of divine love through human vessels.

Ten Relationship Challenges and How to Meet Them - Part 2

Precious loving Father in Heaven, we thank you for the privilege and opportunity that is granted to us to present this afternoon with the presence and power of your Holy Spirit working in us and through us.

Father you said in your Word it is not good that man should be alone and I will give him a help me and so Lord today we thank you for those of us who are still in the journey of marriage we are growing moment by moment day by day And we have submitted ourselves to you through the test and trials of life.

And you are molding us, reminding us that in this journey that we are understanding more clearly your love for your church and your church's dedication to you.

So now guide us at this afternoon as we speak on this beautiful and important topic and may you be praised and glorified we ask in Jesus name.

Well if you bring up that slide on the screen, the seminar is entitled To Have and to Hold On.

You know, So many people marry for better or for worse, but not for good.

For better or for worse, but not for good.

My wife and I have been married for 35 years.

And yesterday I showed the audience a picture of us when we first got married.

I'll throw 1 in there right now because if you were not here yesterday, you surely want to see this clueless young couple.

I even added gray hair to it, but the Lord has blessed us in such a way.

That was us there, but this is a picture of us 35 years ago.

To have and to hold from this day forward for sickness and health and richer for poor, storms or rains, no money in the bank, no food in the cabinet.

And here we are 35 years later, a lot of chisels, a lot of marks, a lot of burns, but we are growing in the Lord.

Too many people marry for better or for worse, but not for good.

I remember the story about the Englishman who met an American at a wishing well in England, And this was an amazing story.

The English man said to the American man, he said, you know, with all the divorces in America, America is becoming the land, America is becoming quickly the land of the free.

With all the divorces, America is becoming the land of the free.

And that American man thought, what can I say to this English chap?

So we said, well we're still getting married so we are the home of the brave.

Still getting married, we're the home of the brave.

And 1 of the greatest examples of a marriage is in fact that because the Lord put the husband and wife together in a perfect setting in the Garden of Eden, as he blessed the Sabbath he blessed the marriage.

And we know the Sabbath has been under attack for a long time and 1 of the last pieces I believe in Satan's puzzle and Satan's arsenal against the church is the destruction of the marriage.

So we we should not say we are married for better or for worse, but we must say we are married for good.

Now I know that in some cases people have been married once, some have been married twice, some have been married 3 times, some have been married 4 times, some have been married 5 times, and the list goes on and on and on.

Some people believe in marriage like Elizabeth Taylor.

She's been married many times and you know she's resting now, she's passed away, but what we must believe in not just the institution of marriage, But we must believe in God's ability to carry us through the storms of life, through the challenges of life, through the disappointments of life, and through the scars, and even when we get patches.

As you know, some of you grew up and you have a cut here or broken legs there.

But I learned a very valuable lesson when I broke my tibia.

I had so many broken bones, I didn't get paid for any of them.

They were all broken because I like sports.

But I learned something very valuable from 1 of my doctors when I broke my tibia bone.

I think that's the 1, the thin 1 down in the shin.

He said to me something that was very profound, which I've learned about relationships.

He said, when that bone heals, when that bone resets, it is going to be stronger than all the other bones in your leg.

He said, oh, any time a bone breaks, it retrofits itself with a calcified sleeve that surrounds it.

He said, well, what happens is because the bone experienced a break it builds around it somewhat of a wall, a fortress that makes it stronger than it was before.

And my wife and I have learned in the places in our lives where we've had attacks from outside of our marriage, challenges within our marriage, either battles that came to us, or sometimes battles of our own making.

We've learned that through all of those at the broken places in relationships, God is able to retrofit us and cause those bad experiences, those broken places, to become places that are not just healed but we're stronger at those broken places than we were before.

But only as you submit to the process, only as you are determined to stay in the journey, will you even be able to appreciate aspects of that journey.

Now for the benefit of those, and I'm looking at the audience, for the benefit of those who are here.

I want to put that list up again and I'll just get in just a moment here of all the aspects of what marriage is included and the different facets of a relationship and how we should look at them because when you think about when you think about building a house I talked about this to somebody the other day.

When you think about building a house, you think about the house in its completed form.

But we were studying the sanctuary and we're learning this at our church.

And I said when you think of the sanctuary message, Think of the sanctuary in your elementary understanding as a blueprint.

You know, Pastor Ivermeyer has a wonderful book called The Blueprint, and he talks about the sanctuary message.

But before you can see the full picture developed, you think about the architecture or the architect that puts together the blueprint and he takes you to the spot where the house is about to be built and he says in this corner right here is going to be the master bedroom and he walks the dimensions of the master bedroom and he said and right over here is going to be the the jacuzzi tub and here is going to be the two-person shower and then right across from that's going to be the suite where we kind of have a little couch chair and he's excited because he sees it and you're thinking this guy's a nut he's excited about dirt there's just we're running back and forth on dirt and he's excited about it and then when you go home you say to your family member where were you going for the last 2 hours?

Well you know Harry was showing us where he's building his house.

He's going nuts over something there's nothing there.

Because Harry sees it before it's finished.

You see what I love about God, he sees the blueprint of the marriage.

He sees it, he says, it has not yet been revealed what you shall be.

1st John 3 verse 2, it has not yet been revealed what you shall be.

He sees us not only in the finished product of our righteous walk with him, but he sees the husband and wife.

And he says to this young couple, there we are again, he says to this young couple, it has not yet been revealed what you shall be.

But he says to the husband, you've got stuff in you that I got to get rid of for you to be what I see.

He says to the wife, there's stuff in you I got to get rid of for you to be what you need to be.

And so he takes us through this process kind of like a white shirt being put in a hot washing machine with hot water.

If a white shirt could talk what would it say?

What did I do to be put in this hot water and to make it worse you throw Clorox in here and I can't see.

And then you got detergent and I'm in there drowning and being agitated and I'm saying what is this all about?

And the Lord is saying there are stains in you I need to get out.

And then and just when the water begins to drain away, all of a sudden the shirt said, finally the ride is over.

Then he hears a click, and all of a sudden comes a spin cycle.

He's holding on for dear life until the Lord is wringing out every bit of him that's still left and he falls to the floor of his experiences like ah and he sees a light above as the washing machine is opened and he's taken out he says finally it's over Then he's carried across the room into another hard machine and they said you thought it was over and they open the drawer and they drop him in And he hears another click and he says, it's getting hot in here.

And then he realizes, this is not what they told me would happen when that guy came to the store and bought me.

This is not what I signed up for." But he's wringing every vestige of himself.

The Lord is wringing out everything that is still there.

Then he's finally taken out and he says, oh I'm so glad it's over, only to be plunged on an ironing board.

And then you realize what marriage is all about.

Then you realize what Christ's relationship with this church is all about.

And since you thought that was just a wonderful imaginary picture, the Bible says he's coming back for a church.

When you say I do, you don't have a clue.

Husbands learn the manipulative way of answering questions.

Do You Speak My Language - Part 3

Precious, loving Father in Heaven, we thank you for the wonderful opportunity we now have to spend this time together and to just learn what it means to be husband and wife in the Lord.

We know that there are those who have been married for decades and those who just got married and everyone in between.

And we invite you, Lord, to tabernacle with us, to give us wisdom from above as we talk about a topic that is of great importance.

Sometimes it could be lighthearted, at other moments, very serious.

And so, strengthen us today in our time we spend together and may you be glorified.

I told you my wife and I, we have been married 35 years, and by God's grace, we have this new saying that we developed last year.

And I wanna invite my wife to come up and share with you.

You want to clap, whatever you want to do.

When we were in the Cayman Islands last year, we always try to celebrate.

1 of the things that we do is we celebrate.

Yeah, we do, especially our anniversaries.

So whenever something happens, we always tell people not that date, that's our anniversary.

We have a school in Thompsonville, and it just so happens that every year, graduation, everything about our life is around something that has to do with the church or the school of the conference.

Her birthday is when I'm at pastor's meetings, my birthday is when we're at camp meeting, and the school graduation is during our anniversary.

So we try to always work around that and we said to ourselves if we had known that our anniversary would fall at such a critical time in church we would have picked a different time but we picked May 22nd 1983 write that down next year we'll give you our address you can send us gifts when you like to but May 22nd 19 but this year what was our saying honey let's do it together.

Together, together, forever, eternity in view.

And that has become such a saying in our marriage, in our relationship, that sometimes we could be in an audience, in a room or an audience like this, and I'd make eye contact with her, and we'd go like this.

If you tell us how many times you use it, we'll just give us your credit card information.

We protect each other from the outside world and then sometimes we protect each other from each other.

But if you've been married you know what I'm talking about because no 2 people are alike and what I want to begin today by talking about I want to talk about the evidence of a long and prosperous marriage.

Because, you know, different people have different ideas about a prosperous relationship.

And we believe a prosperous relationship is a relationship that stays together through the ups and downs, the hard times, the easy times, when couples really get to the place where the wife wants to shoot the husband and the husband wants to run through a glass window without opening it, You know, you have those days.

And if you've been married more than a decade or 20 years or 50 years or 30 years, you know you didn't get there on a flowery bed of bees.

You got there because you decided, okay, honey, we are so messed up that if we left each other, nobody would want us anyway.

And there's some people that are so messed up when they leave They come back anyway because I can't find anybody that wants to do what I want them to do so I'm coming back But Marriage is intended by God to be a blessing.

But the devil, just like he attacks the Sabbath, he attacks the marriage.

He wants the marriage to be a perpetual hardship, a curse, and just like he says the Sabbath is a burden, he tries to make marriage a burden.

The only problem with marriage is it's a daily job.

But I heard something that's very important.

They said if you find a job you like, it's no longer work.

So if you If you love your wife, it's no longer work.

If you love your husband, it's no longer work.

But you don't fool yourself into thinking that.

You can show up every day and have a successful relationship without thinking, because you got to think.

Because wives ask questions sometimes that husbands answer and get in trouble just for answering.

So be careful when your wife asks you a question because she's thought long and hard about the answer.

By the time she gets the courage to ask you, notice her body language.

I mean, she has all the facts put together.

I mean, so you got to be really careful in how you ask questions.

But 1 story that I'd like to begin with this lighthearted, is 2 couples that were married for 50 years.

And after 50 years, they sat on the couch together, you know, by the way, you get to the point where you're so predictable, you know what I'm talking about?

Well, you could predict each other, you know what she's going to say, you know what he's going to say, you start ending each other's sentences.

But sometimes you take each other for granted and you sit down with family or on the couch and you're kind of like, okay it's the news.

And you just take each other for granted.

So 1 day the wife broke into the silent mode of the husband's recessitudes and she said, you know, I remember when you used to hug me.

And then he just slid over and put his arm around his wife.

You know who your spouse is Don't let me mess you up.

But anyhow, so he slides over and he puts his arms around her and hug her.

And then she said, I remember those days when you used to whisper sweet nothings in my ear.

And he just tilted up, began to whisper sweet nothings in her ear.

And she said, I also remember when you used to nibble on my earlobes.

Keys to Better Communication - Part 4

Our precious Father in heaven, as we open our minds this afternoon to another topic on marriage and relationships between husband and wife.

Lord, we invite your presence to continue with us.

We know that you established marriage to be a blessing and the enemy of souls has sought to make it anything but a blessing.

And so today Lord as we deal with some very serious issues and some matters of the heart we pray for wisdom and guidance from above.

Give our minds the clarity that we need and may this place today be filled with hearts that are willing.

Series

To Have and to Hold on

Ten Relationship Challenges and How to Meet Them - Part 2

Transcript

Parent Series

Parent Conference

Sponsor

Recorded

Marriage Heart to Heart

1. An Enduring Commitment

1h 5m

Relationship Revival

1. Are You All In?

1h 13m

Biblical Relationships (Afternoon meetings)

Preparing to Tie the Knot (Part 1)

29m

Families

Leading Our Families

57m

The Renewing of Our Minds

4. Treating Worries, Anxieties, and Guilt

1h 13m

The Great Decision: Who Should I Marry?

1h 19m

To Have and to Hold on

Holding On - Part 5

1h 13m

Got Thinking Problems?

Coping with Our Problems - Part 1

1h 13m

Breakout Session B

When You Mess Up, How do you Fix Up

1h 2m

Raising Tech Safe Kids

2. How to Communicate with Kids Who Don’t Want to Talk

1h 16m

Marriage

How Keeping Your Vow Benefits Many Lives!

47m

Reviving Your Devotional Life

50m

Sound Doctrine